View source for War Frat Senior Grill Sergeant

{{battle|text=This is a frat boy who stood at the crossroads (so you won't be lonely) on midnight of All Hallow's Eve and traded his soul for the ability to do things with a grill that go beyond our mortal ken. Seeing as how he's a frat boy and all, nobody noticed he didn't have a soul, and everyone agrees his chicken wings are worth a couple of extra eons in purgatory.

|hit=He cooks up the tastiest batburger you've ever smelled, then won't let you have a bite. You bite your tongue in frustration. {{ouch|4}}

He somehow heats a coal until it goes out the other side of hot and down to absolute zero. Then he throws it at you. {{element|cold}}

He points at you, then at a batburger, then grills the batburger. Grill-marks appear on your {{part}} and {{part}}.{{ouch|4}}{{element|hot}}

He tosses a triple-fried lump of lard into your mouth. It tastes delicious, but it's greasier than a bucket of grease. {{ouch|4}} {{element|sleaze}}

|miss=He throws a grilled batburger at you, but you dodge.

He offers you some devils-food cake, but you're not a devil, so you're not tempted.

He tries to skewer you with a skewer, but his attack goes somewhat askew.

He tempts you with deep-fried goodies, but you resist.
|critical=He pulls three knob ka-bobs off his grill and skewers you in the {{part}}, {{part}}, and {{part}}. Somehow the skewers are ice-cold, while the kabobs themselves are white-hot. Spooky, man. {{ouch|4}} {{element|spooky}}
|fumble=Just as he starts to attack again, Satan pops up in a sulfurous cloud and demands a tribute. The grillmaster has to quickly cook up a couple of beelzeburgers before he can rejoin the fray.
|special=The grill sergeant pulls out a bottle of lighter fluid, hoses you down with it, and lights a match. You can guess what ensues.

You're on fire! {{element|hot}}
}}

{{acquire|item=asbestos apron|chance=5%}}
{{acquire|item=Frat Army FGF|chance=19.9%}}
{{acquire|item=kick-ass kicks|chance=14.8%}}
{{acquire|item=Monstar energy beverage|chance=30.7%}}
{{acquire|item=PADL Phone|chance=3.7%}}
{{acquire|item=war tongs|chance=18.8%}}

{{stat|52-53}}
----
Occurs at [[The Battlefield (War Hippy Fatigues)]].

==Notes==
*If he lights you on fire you continue to get the "You're on fire!" message and fire damage for the next three rounds, though it decreases. You will take damage on any action, even "twiddling your thumbs."
*The [[asbestos apron]] will not drop unless you have the [[Torso Awaregness]] skill.

==References==
* The message "at the crossroads (so you won't be lonely)" is a reference to the 1995 song "[[Wikipedia: Tha Crossroads|Tha Crossroads]]" by [[Wikipedia:Bone Thugs-n-Harmony|Bone Thugs-n-Harmony]].
* Selling your soul at the crossroads is a reference to the song "[[Wikipedia:Cross Road Blues|Cross Road Blues]]" by [[Wikipedia: Robert Johnson (musician)|Robert Johnson]].
* The name is a clear pun of the military position Senior Drill Sergeant.
* The cold damage attack is a reference to several [[Wikipedia:Terry Pratchett|Terry Pratchett]] novels in which he refers to things going to one extreme and "out the other side."