Drunken half-orc hobo

Drunken half-orc hobo
Monster ID	158
Locations	The Haunted Pantry: Oh No, Hobo, The Sleazy Back Alley, The Sleazy Back Alley (Retired)
Hit Points	1
Attack	1
Defense	0
No-Hit	11
Initiative	40
Meat	None
Phylum	hobo
Elements	stench
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	head, arm, leg, torso
Drops	dirty hobo gloves, Mad Train wine, moxie weed
Bounty	hobo gristle
Pickpocket	Boozehounds Anonymous token
Accordion	beer-battered accordion
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting a drunken half-orc hobo

In the Sleazy Back Alley, you are set upon by a drunken half-orc hobo. You're as overpowered by his stench as you are confused by his slurred missives. One thing is for sure, though -- it's beat or be beaten.

Hit Message(s):

He pelts you with a handful of spare change. Argh! (stench damage)

You gain 3−4 Meat

He smacks you upside the <arm> with a bottle of Mad Train Wine. Now there's too much blood in your broken-glass-stream. Ooh! (stench damage)

He stabs you with a sharp piece of rusty metal. Your jaw locks up. Ouch! (stench damage)

He showers you with corrosive, acidic vomit! You stagger under this corrosion, feeling like you've bled all you can, and can't bleed no more. Ooh! (stench damage)

Critical Hit Message:

He knocks you out with his bottle of Mad Train. When you wake up, you feel like you got a visit from the Bruise Fairy. He stands in front of you, grinning, then smacks you again. Eek! (stench damage)

Miss Message(s):

He tries to throw spare change at you, but you block it with a spare tire you find in the alley.

He starts to hit you with his bottle of Mad Train, but decides to drink out of it instead.

He vomits up an acidic stew of Mad Train wine and stomach acid, but you dodge this corrosion. You wish some one would give you some sirens.

He tries to stab you with a sharp piece of rusty metal, but you tell him not to metal in your affairs.

Fumble Message:

He raises his arms and an overpowering odor fills the alley. Before it can overpower you, though, a freak thunderstorm washes him clean. He looks down at his un-grimed body and screams. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire an item: dirty hobo gloves (30.9% chance)*

You acquire an item: Mad Train wine (59.6% chance)*

You acquire an item: moxie weed (14.9% chance)*

You gain 1 <substat>.

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Occurs at The Sleazy Back Alley, and in The Haunted Pantry as a choice of the Oh No, Hobo adventure. Occurred in The Sleazy Back Alley (Retired).

Notes

• Using Pickpocket on this monster may yield a Boozehounds Anonymous token from about 10% of pickpocket attempts.
• Becomes hung-over half-orc hobo after ascension, except for the choice non-combats. Then, after you ascend again, it reverts back to the drunken variation.
• Using Transcendent Olfaction on this monster does not help track hung-over half-orc hobo.
• If you are an Accordion Thief and haven't stolen an accordion from this monster today, this text is added to the introduction:

  Your keen Accordion Thief eyes spy a battered accordion peeking out of the hobo's waistband. And also that his pants are really baggy!

• If you then cast Steal Accordion:

  You pluck the accordion from the hobo's filthy pants, leaving him none the wiser (and none the cleaner.)

  You acquire an item: beer-battered accordion

References

• The attack text "You stagger under this corrosion, feeling like you've bled all you can, and can't bleed no more" is probably a reference to The Sisters of Mercy song "This Corrosion", as is the miss text "dodge this corrosion".

History

• Used to have a 100% chance to drop Hobo gristle if you were on the appropriate bounty hunt prior to the Bounty Hunter revamp on January 14, 2014.