Guy Made Of Bees (Bees Hate You)

Guy Made Of Bees
Monster ID	424
Locations	The Naughty Sorceress' Tower
Hit Points	99999
Attack	99999
Defense	89999
Initiative	0
Meat	None
Phylum	horror
Elements	None
Resistance	100% all
Monster Parts	unknown
Drops	Thwaitgold bee statuette
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting The Guy Made Of Bees

Bzzzzzzz...

"Dang it!" you shout. "How many times do I have to kill you? This battle has taken over a half an hour and there's no save point!"

Bzzzzzzzzzz...

"Ha! You will never defeat me!" The Sorceress cackles. There is a muffled *POP* and a slightly greasy smell as the apparition vanishes and is replaced by a nasty-looking floating sausage.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

A horrible droning fills the room as the room fills with horrible drones -- bees, that is, which pour through the window in a cloud and surround the sausage-cum-sorceress.

"What is going on here?" she shrieks. "What do you think you're doing?"

"WE ARE BEES. YOUR TIME IS AT AN END."

The swarm envelops the sausage and proceeds to tear it apart. You clap your hands to your ears, but it does little to protect you from the horrifying screams. Eventually, their work finished, the bees move away from the sad grease-spot on the floor and approach you. They shift into the roughly-humanoid form known only as the Guy Made of Bees.

"THIS PLACE IS OURS NOW."

"This… this tower? Well sure, I--"

"NO. THIS KINGDOM."

You grit your teeth. "I'm not gonna let you take over the kingdom, Bees."

"YOU WILL NOT STOP US, HUMAN. WE ARE BEES. WE HATE YOU."

---

After Combat

• If a Wand of Nagamar is in your inventory:

"Oh yeah?" you shout. "Well, what do you think of... THIS?" You pull the Wand of Nagamar from your sleeve and point it at malevolent^[sic] swarm. A bolt of light streams from the wand and transforms the Guy Made of Bees into A Bemused Fogey.

"Ho ho ho!" the old man chuckles, then frowns. He scatters into a cloud of bees, which then reforms into its humanoid shape.

"THAT DEVICE WILL NOT SAVE YOU, HU--" Light sprays from the wand again, turning them into an Aged Beefy Sumo.

The elderly sumo wrestler growls, snatches the Wand from you, and breaks it in half before dissipating back into a swarm of bees.

"ENOUGH NONSENSE. PREPARE TO DIE."

• When using an Antique hand mirror:

The swarm freezes as you pull out the antique hand-mirror. "THE SPOOKYRAVEN HUMAN'S MIRROR! HOW DID YOU... NO!" As you hurl the mirror at the ground, the bees leap through the air in a futile attempt to catch it, but the mirror shatters on the floor with a noise as loud as thunder. The Guy Made of Bees reaches out, as if to strangle you, but the bees are already dissolving into puffs of yellow and black dust. "WE WILL RETURN, HUMAN. WE ARE BEES. WE HATE..." Then, silence. "And here you thought you'd take the kingdom... by swarm," you say, as you put on your sunglasses. "Yeeeaaaaaahhhhhh!"

You acquire an item: Instant Karma (100.0% if player is at level 13; otherwise, 0% chance)*

You acquire an item: Thwaitgold bee statuette

You gain 500 <substat>.

Go back to the Sorceress' Chamber

Notes

• Encountered in the Lair of the Naughty Sorceress after defeating her second form while in a Bees Hate You run.
• You lose a Wand of Nagamar when the sumo wrestler breaks it.
• This monster cannot be copied.
• This monster has the same factoids as the regular guy.
• This version of the Guy Made Of Bees has 100% damage resistance. The antique hand mirror is the only feasible way of defeating it.

References

• See Guy Made Of Bees for references related to the monster in general.
• The "by swarm" joke at the end is a reference to Horatio Caine, a character from CSI: Miami, and his habit of making one-liner jokes.