Beaver

Beaver
Monster ID	539
Locations	The Hole in the Sky
Hit Points	150
Attack	162
Defense	145
No-Hit	172
Initiative	70
Meat	None
Phylum	constellation
Elements	sleaze
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	head, leg, star, tail
Drops	line, star, star
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting The Beaver

The Astronomers of old named this constellation "The Beaver" because the stars that comprise it are very volatile, and seem to be almost eager to go supernova. Then they noticed that it was also sort of shaped like the small mammal they referred to as the flat-tailed river ferret, so they changed that animal's name to "beaver."

Hit Message(s):

It eagerly smacks you with its big, flat tail. You somewhat less eagerly feel big, flat pain. Argh! Ow! Eek! Eek! Ugh! Oof!

It produces a huge celestial cleaver and successfully cleaves you in twain. You jump around like a frog in Calaveras County, howling in pain. Ugh! Eek! Ouch! Ooh! Ouch! Eek!

It stacks a bunch of celestial logs on you. Dam it! Oof! Eek! Ugh! Ugh! Argh! Ow!

It swims through the sky around you, creating a whirling vortex and making you really, really dizzy. Ooh! Ouch! Ooh! Eek! Ugh! Oof!

Critical Hit Message:

It nibbles on you with its little rodent-teeth. It wouldn't hurt, except the points of said teeth are flaming balls of gas. Argh! Ouch! Ooh! Ow! Ouch! Argh! (hot damage)

Miss Message(s):

It eagerly smacks at you with its big, flat tail, but you dodge with even more eagerness.

It tries to nibble on you, but you dodge its gaping beaver mouth.

It tries to stack logs on top of you, but you get out of the dam way.

It swims through the sky around you, seemingly without a care in the world. What a relaxed, open beaver.

Fumble Message:

It tries to cleave you with a cleaver, but you know better than to get cleaved by a beaver, and you ward off the attack like junebugs in june. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire an item: star (? chance)*

You acquire an item: star (? chance)*

You acquire an item: line (? chance)*

You gain 32? <substat>.

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Occurs at The Hole in the Sky.

References

• The references to eagerness derive from the term "eager beaver."
• The several instances of "dam" in combat messages appearing when fighting this monster is a reference to the fact that beavers are known for constructing dams.
• "You jump around like a frog in Calaveras County" is a reference to the Mark Twain short story "The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County."
• The fumble message refers to the members of the Cleaver family from the television show Leave It to Beaver, namely Ward, June, and (of course) Beaver.
• The name of this monster is a reference to female genitalia.