Doctor Oh, the Junksprite Boss

Doctor Oh, the Junksprite Boss
Monster ID	1439
Locations	The Old Landfill: Once More Unto the Junk
Hit Points	60
Attack	40
Defense	40
Initiative	0
Meat	None
Phylum	humanoid
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	arm, leg, head, torso, wing
Drops	eternal car battery
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting Doctor Oh, the Junksprite Boss

You grab a mallet and whack the hubcap. A junksprite comes running into the room to see who made the noise. He's dressed a little differently than the other sprites you've seen; he's got goggles and a bright red cape, and his entire torso is wrapped in gleaming bronze chain. "Who made a wondrous discovery?" he says, excited. "Who gets to add another link to the chain?"

You shrug your shoulders. "Oh, I beg your pardon," he says, "you're new here. I'm Doctor Oh, the lead brain in the junksprite makerspace, and every time someone comes up with a truly creative and original idea, that junksprite gets to bang the gong. I take the plans for the idea and inscribe them on one of these links, so everyone can use them."

"What if the junksprite wants to keep the idea to his or herself, to maybe make a profit off of it?" you ask.

"Well, then I hit them with the chain until they see reason," Doctor Oh replies. "Knowledge functions best when it is freely shared without regard to personal profit."

"So you're saying information wants to be free?" you ask.

"Information doesn't want anything! It can't think! But I'm beginning to think you want a beatdown," he says, unwinding his chain. Looks like he's got some wondrous links to show you, and won't stop until you've felt them all.

or

You turn on the hot water to wash your hands, and it emits that high-pitched whine of ancient plumbing under stress. You quickly turn it off, but not before you hear someone shout, "dangit, I said we were 3D-printing a new hot water valve from open-source plans under a Commonly Creative license, and for nobody to use the hot water until it was done!"

Then the shouter runs into the room, scowling. He's got a little more flair than the other junksprites you've seen; he's wearing goggles and a bright red cape, and he's got a long chain wrapped around his body. "What the--hey, you're not a junksprite! Welcome to our hackspace! I'm Doctor Oh, the--well, we don't have a hierarchy around here, but I guess you could say I'm in charge. We have wonderful things to show you!" He holds up part of the chain. "Each of these links is a wonder in its own right, and together they're a masterpiece of freely-shared knowledge."

"Sounds great," you say, "but I really don't have time to look at a bunch of links, no matter how enlightening."

"Well," Doctor Oh replies, "it's up to you, I guess. You're just as free to leave as I am free to beat you up for trying to leave. Isn't that wondrous?"

or

Hit Message(s):

not known

Critical Hit Message:

not known

Miss Message(s):

He 3D-prints an open-source club, but it shatters when he smacks you with it. Must be a flaw in the design.

Fumble Message:

not known

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After Combat

You acquire an item: eternal car battery

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Occurs at The Old Landfill (choice adventure).

References

His name, description, and dialogue are references to the celebrity blogger and copyright activist Cory Doctorow.