Gunther, Lord of the Smackdown

There are some vague or non-exact figures and information on this page. Some spading is required. Highest fail points for tests (lowest pass is basically useless information without some idea of how likely a given stat value is to pass

Gunther, Lord of the Smackdown

Gunther, Lord of the Smackdown is located in the Brotherhood of the Smackdown. He decides whether or not you may enter the guild by giving you tasks and judging your ability to complete them. Upon completion of the first task, you are eligible to be trained by Torg, the Trainer. Upon completion of the second task, you can start the Bitchin' Meatcar Quest. Upon completion of the third and fourth task, you are permitted to purchase items from The Smacketeria.

First task

• The first task is to fetch a can of beans. 3 Muscle is the bare minimum to succeed. Higher Muscle is much more likely to pass.
• Reward: Access to The Barrel full of Barrels, Torg the Trainer, and The Malus of Forethought (if you have the Pulverize skill), as well as several items (see below).
• Before attempting the test:

"Greetings, <name>. I am Gunther, the leader of the Brotherhood. If you wish to join us, there are several tasks you must perform in order by prove yourself.

The first task is this: Do you see that pot of baked beans over there? Bring it to me."

Carry the Beans (1)

• Failing the test:

Those are some heavy beans! Try as you might, you are unable to lift the pot.

Gunther sneers at you disdainfully.

• Message when completing it:

You lift the pot of beans, and proudly place it at Gunther's feet.

"Well done, Initiate," says Gunther. "Welcome to the Brotherhood."

"Here, have a small reward. You can get more of these items at the Barrel Full of Barrels, in the Big Mountains. I'll mark it on your map.

Seal Clubber	Turtle Tamer
You acquire 2 enchanted barbells	You acquire 2 enchanted barbells
You acquire an item: giant moxie weed	You acquire an item: concentrated magicalness pill
You acquire N fuzzbumps	You acquire N slips 'n' slide
N is 3 on one's first ascension run, 2 on the second, 1 on the third, and 0 on all subsequent runs.

You can also now use the services of the guild's trainer, who will teach you how to do all kinds of things.

Second task

• The second task is to arm-wrestle Olaf the Janitor. 9 Muscle is the bare minimum to succeed. Higher Muscle is much more likely to pass.
• Reward: The Bitchin' Meatcar Quest.
• Before attempting the test:
  

"Greetings, Initiate," says Gunther. "Are you prepared for your second task? If you can defeat Olaf, our janitor, in an arm-wrestling match, I will grant you permission to use the guild meatcar."

• Failing the test:

Olaf turns out to be much stronger than he looks. You are unable to beat him.

Gunther shakes his head sadly.

• Message when completing it:
  

You swiftly show Olaf who's boss, and he walks away, dejected, rubbing his bicep.

"Bravo, Initiate," says Gunther. "You now have permission to use the Brotherhood's meatcar. Olaf will tell you where he parked it."

Third task

• The third task is to eat a 72-ounce steak in one sitting. 13 Muscle is the bare minimum to succeed. Higher Muscle is much more likely to pass.
• Before attempting the test:
  

"One more task," says Gunther, "and you will be a full member of the Brotherhood of the Smackdown.

The challenge is this: you must eat this entire 72-ounce steak in one sitting."

• Failing the test:

You manage to eat most of the steak, but you can't finish the last few bites.

"Try again when you're a little tougher," says Gunther.

• Message when completing it:
  

You easily polish off the steak.

Gunther smiles. "Welcome to the Brotherhood of the Smackdown, <name>." he says.

Eating the 72-ounce steak does not violate Boozetafarian or Oxygenarian conduct.

Fourth task

• The fourth task is to perform 500 chin-ups. 17 Muscle is the bare minimum to succeed. Higher Muscle is much more likely to pass.
• Reward: Access to The Smacketeria.
• Before attempting the test:
  

Though you are now a full member, you must further prove yourself in order to gain access to our Guild store, the Smacketeria. I'd say... 500 chinups would do the trick.

• Failing the test:
  

After 100 chinups, you're feeling good. After 200 chinups, you're feeling not so good. After 300 chinups, you're feeling pretty bad. After 400 chinups, you're feeling the floor hit you in the face.

"Perhaps you should try again when you're stronger," says Gunther.

• Message when completing it:
  

You grab the bar, and begin to do chinups. It starts to get pretty difficult at number 450, but you redouble your efforts, and complete the challenge.

"Enjoy the Smacketeria," says Gunther.

On Subsequent Visits

You have already passed all of the challenges of your Guild.