EXtreme Sports Orcs

EXtreme Sports Orcs
Monster ID	336
Locations	Orcish Frat House, The Road to the White Citadel (Retired)
Hit Points	30
Attack	39
Defense	34
No-Hit	48
Initiative	60
Meat	24-36
Phylum	orc
Elements	sleaze
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	head, arm, leg, torso
Drops	eXtreme mittens, flask flops, Mountain Stream soda, Orcish baseball cap, Orcish cargo shorts, ultimate ultimate frisbee
Quest	hang glider
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting some eXtreme Sports Orcs

These are Orcs that are more specialized than the standard Frat Orcs, but not as much as eXtreme Orcish Snowboarders. Mainly they like to shout “EXTREME!” a lot, and do silly things like riding kayaks in Quik-E-Marts.

Hit Message(s):

The eXtreme sports Orcs pummel you with a variety of eXtreme sports equipment. "EXTREME!" Argh! Eek! (sleaze damage)

The eXtreme sports Orcs give you a beating rated 9.5 on a scale of 1 (not so eXtreme) to 10 (eXtremely eXtreme). Argh! Oof! (sleaze damage)

Critical Hit Message:

One of the orcs gets into a kayak, and the other one picks him up and throws him at you. Those things are a lot heavier than they look. Oof! Argh! Ugh! (sleaze damage)

Miss Message(s):

The eXtreme sports Orcs find themselves unable to decide which sporting goods would be most eXtreme to pummel you with. With which to pummel you.

The eXtreme sports Orcs’ failure to hurt you is SO not eXtreme.

Fumble Message:

One of the orcs gets into a kayak, and the other one picks him up and throws him at you. Fortunately, his paddle gets stuck on a nearby tree and he veers harmlessly out of the way. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You gain 24-36 Meat (average: 30, stdev: 2.83)*

You acquire an item: eXtreme mittens (4% chance)*

You acquire an item: Mountain Stream soda (39% chance)*

You acquire an item: Orcish baseball cap (9% chance)*

You acquire an item: Orcish cargo shorts (10% chance)*

You acquire an item: ultimate ultimate frisbee (10% chance)*

• If you have received the Summer Holiday adventure:

You acquire an item: hang glider (100% chance)*

You gain 9-10 <substat>.

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Occurs at The Road to the White Citadel.

Notes

• The hang glider is a one time drop.

References

• This adventure refers to events in the movie Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle. In the movie, a group of antagonists do irritating things (e.g., riding a kayak inside a convenience store) while yelling, "EXTREME!"
• One of the miss messages refers to a moment in the aforementioned movie when after having their truck stolen, one of the antagonists comments, "Dude, that was SO not extreme."
• Quik-E-Mart is a small chain of convenience stores in Washington state. A larger convenience store chain exists in metropolitan areas such as Phoenix, Arizona, under the similar name QuikTrip. This name may also be influenced by Kwik-E-Mart, the name of the convenience store on The Simpsons.