An Elf Haberdasher
An Elf Haberdasher is located in the 2016 incarnation of Crimbo Town after aligning Uncle Crimbo's Reindeer Chakra.
- After aligning Uncle Crimbo's Beard Chakra:
You approach the serious-looking elf in his green-with-red-pinstripes suit. "You must be the one fixing our little... dilemma," he says, with a stiff handshake.
"That's right," you say.
"I am Robert. I am Uncle Crimbo's chief Haberdasher."
"Robert? Not something cute like Hatsworth, or..."
"No. I am in charge of Uncle Crimbo's hat. It is an extremely important job. That hat is the single most recognizable symbol of Uncle Crimbo, and by extension, Crimbo itself. Even the most haphazard child's crayon scribble is identifiable as being Uncle Crimbo, if it has a red triangle with a white pom-pom on top. In a sense, the hat is Uncle Crimbo, just as Uncle Crimbo is the holiday."
"Gosh!" you say. "So Hat is the last chakra, then?"
"Correct. But that's not the end of the problem." He picks up a wrapped Crimbo present, tears off the paper to reveal an aluminum attache case, unlocks the case, and opens it to reveal a foam lining with a cut-out in the shape of a triangle with a little circle at the top. The cut-out is empty.
"Is this... what I think it is?" you ask.
"Probably, yes, if you think it is an absence of Uncle Crimbo's hat. The hat is missing, and must be recovered."
"I see. All right, I'm on it."
"You have done well so far, and I do not doubt your abilities. Good luck, adventurer."
- Subsequent visits (before aligning Uncle Crimbo's Hat Chakra):
"Greetings, adventurer," Robert says, stony-faced. "I sense, from the general lack of extreme jubilation in the vicinity, that you have not yet finished your task."
"Er, no. Still working on it," you say.
"Do not dally. We are nearly out of time."
"Yeah, don't worry. I'm on it."
- After aligning Uncle Crimbo's Hat Chakra:
"Hey Robert!" you say to the besuited Haberdasher. "I did it! Both things! I fixed Uncle Crimbo's chakras, and gave him his hat back!"
Robert nods calmly. "Yes, I... knew, somehow. We all know." He gestures around at all the elves, who are cheering and dancing in the snow and throwing snowballs and generally doing excited happy elf things. "Thank you, %name%," he says. "Tammy will want to congratulate you more officially."
