Irritating Series of Random Encounters

They kind of blandly stomp you into a mudhole. Yawn. I mean, Ow. Argh! Eek!

They smack you around a little. And then a little more. Ugh! Ow!

They all swarm around you, bouncing excitedly up and down. Then they start bouncing up and down on top of you. You feel irritated, random, and in intense pain. Ow! Ooh! Argh! Ow!

They blandly and blindly attack, but you distractedly step to the side.

They try and hit you, but for some reason just stand about ten feet away and make hitting motions.

They start to attack again, but are stopped by a series of unfortunate events. Most of which are far too unfortunate to describe. Sorry about that.

You gain 81−179 Meat (average: 133.8, stdev: 18.0)*

You acquire an item: cocoa eggshell fragment (20.3% chance)*

You acquire an item: soft green echo eyedrop antidote (21.2% chance)*

You acquire an item: tiny house (20.1% chance)*

You gain 21 <substat>.

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Occurs at The Penultimate Fantasy Airship.

References

• Like many things that occur on the Penultimate Fantasy Airship, this monster is a Final Fantasy reference. It references the fact that you can never go far in dungeons and fields in FF (and many other RPGs, for that matter) without having a random encounter with an enemy. In the first Final Fantasy, there was even an area (which, thankfully, could be bypassed) that automatically triggered a random battle every time the party took a step!
• Additionally, this monster resembles the unoffical mascot of Square-Enix's other well known RPG series Dragon Quest (also known as Dragon Warrior), the Slimes.
• "They try and hit you, but for some reason just stand about ten feet away and make hitting motions" refers to many RPG's, where the monsters never actually approach you to attack, they just sort of make motions or flash and your characters take damage.
• "They blandly and blindly attack, but you distractedly step to the side." may refer to how monsters in early RPGs would always use the same hitting motion, as well as the fact that player characters would appear to make no effort to actually evade the attack when the attack misses.
• This monster's name and fumble message refers to the children's book series A Series of Unfortunate Events.