PvP/minigames
PvP fights are resolved by scoring points in minigames. A different set of minigames exist in each PvP season. These are the minigames that have appeared so far, with an explanation of how each one works.
The minigames appear in alphabetical order and cover all seasons.
Minigames
Adventurer's Prowess
Adventurer's Prowess exists in every season. It is the first minigame in any fight where the attacker chooses to attack with stats. It will never be chosen randomly.
When attacking with stats, the attacker picks which stat to use. The attacker's buffed stat is compared to the defender's same buffed stat, and the higher stat takes the minigame.
There may be some variance(?). Also, in Season 1, the defender sometimes defended with a different stat than the attacker used. This no longer happens.
Adventurer's Flexibility
This minigame only existed in Season 1. It was the second minigame in every fight when attacking with stats. One of the two stats the attacker did not choose was randomly selected, and compared to the defender's stat. The higher buffed stat took the minigame.
This minigame was retired after Season 1.
As the Pie Turns
This minigame counts the total number of key lime pies eaten this Season.
Balanced Diet Comparison
This minigame counts the number of different food items eaten in the past 30 days, or since the start of the PvP Season, whichever is later.
In Season 1, this minigame included foods eaten before the start of the Season.
You can see which food items you've eaten recently by going to your character sheet, clicking "Favorite Food", scrolling down to the bottom, and clicking "Sort by Recentness of Consumption".
Birds of a Slimy Feather
This minigame counts the number of Slimy Eyeballs in the player's pledged clan's trophy case.
This minigame existed only in Season 1, and counted all Slimy Eyeballs, regardless of whether they were earned during the Season. This gave an advantage to clans who happened to have a large number of them already.
It is not known whether the game is able to track clan trophies earned since the start of a PvP Season.
Bleeding Contest
This minigame compares total current HP (highest wins).
Broad Resistance Contest
This minigame compares elemental resistances. Each player's lowest single elemental resistance is determined, and the higher number wins.
E.g. if player A has 5 points in every element, and player B has 6 points of Hot, Cold, Spooky and Sleaze resistance, but only 4 points of Stench resistance, player A wins.
Deepest Diver
This minigame counts your total pressure penalty negation ("makes you a better diver"). This includes equipment and effects.
Epic-urean
This minigame counts total Hobo Power.
Exterminator, Too
This minigame counts the number of drunken rats defeated in the Tavern Cellar during the Season. A bunch of drunken rats counts for 3 points, and a drunken rat king counts for 5 points. Stomping a drunken rat into paste also counts for 1 point.
An unlimited number of drunken rats may be fought by revisiting the faucet.
Familiar Show
This minigame compares familiar weight (heaviest wins).
Flowers Picked
This minigame counts the number of pretty flowers picked in PvP fights this Season. It also includes pretty flowers produced as a result of a looting attempt tbat was foiled by a meat golem.
How Hung Over Are You?
This minigame compares yesterday's drunkenness level (highest wins).
Karmic Battle
This minigame counts the amount of Karma earned this Season. The Karma is only counted after you arrive in Valhalla, and only includes Karma for your ascension; it does not include Karma received for discarding Instant Karma.
Laconic Dresser
This minigame counts the total length (in "characters") of the names of all equipment worn. The lowest total wins. An empty equipment slot counts as 23 points.
Empty slots include the offhand slot when wielding a two-handed weapon, the shirt slot when the player does not have Torso Awaregness or Best Dressed, and the familiar equipment slot when the player cannot use familiars.
"Characters" are not as straightforward as they may appear. Items with non-ASCII characters, or with HTML metacharacters, were originally counted according to their HTML-encoded names. Later, CDMoyer changed this.
Least Boring Slideshow
This minigame counts the number of different zones (snarfblats) visited in the past X days. The number of days has varies from Season to Season.
There is no native in-game way to determine which zones you have visited recently; obviously the game tracks them, but it does not reveal this to you. Third-party or manual tracking is required if you wish to optimize this minigame.
In Season 2 where this minigame first appeared, the Booth said it counted visits in the past 5 days, but it is believed that the actual time period was longer (possibly 7 or 10 days). When the minigame appeared again in Season 8, the booth said 10 days.
Letter of the Moment
This minigame counts the total number of times a specific letter appears in the names of all equipment worn. The letter is chosen at random every 24 hours or so.
As with Laconic and Verbosity, the count of "letters" in item names has not traditionally been straightforward. For example, the ™ character (which is HTML-encoded as ™) counted 1 point for R. This may have changed (needs research).
Lightest Load
This minigame compares the total power of each player's hat, shirt and pants (lowest total wins).
Living Forever
This minigame compares players' current Fame (highest wins).
Most Murderous
This minigame counts the number of "bosses" defeated this Season.
Not all of the obvious bosses count. The list of eligible bosses is (almost?) the same as the list of badass pie donors for the Knob Goblin Organ Grinder. Ed the Undying used to count at the beginning of Season 2, but was changed multiple times; current status unknown.
Most Things Eaten
This minigame counts the total number of food items eaten this Season. They need not be different.
Most Unbalanced
This minigame compares the ratio of each player's buffed main stat to the sum of the other two buffed stats. That is, score = Main / (Secondary + Tertiary).
To optimize this mini, reduce your offstats to 1 (via poison and other negative status effects). The simplicity of this strategy may be the reason this minigame has not reappeared since Season 6.
Mystery Contest
Each time this minigame appears, it is different. The nature of the minigame is not revealed to players; it must be spaded.
In Season 1, the Mystery Contest counted the number of baggies of powdered sugar in each player's Display Case. The post-fight text included an indication of the relative scores.
In Season 2, the Mystery Contest counted the length of the active familiar's name (modulo 10) and the number of adventures remaining. (spading)
In Season 3, the Mystery Contest counted the number of different items in each player's mall store priced at 999 Meat or less. (spading)
In Season 6, the Mystery Contest counted your total Meat on hand (modulo 100), with some undetermined additional factor(s). (spading)
Newest Born
This minigame compares the amount of time since each player last ascended (shortest time wins).
This minigame typically counts time using unusual units. In Season 4, it counted time in microcenturies.
Out of the Frying Pan
This minigame compares the amount of time since each player last received an effect from the Deep Fat Friars (shortest time wins).
Purity
This minigame counts the number of active effects; the player with the fewest wins.
Originally, everything listed under "Effects" on the left panel counted. Later, timers were excluded. Still later, any effect that is not decremented by PvP fights was excluded.
Saltiest Mariner
This minigame counts the number of slugs of vodka drunk this Season.
Sharing the Love
This minigame counts the number of different opponents defeated while attacking this Season. (This does not include defensive victories.)
Showing Initiative
This minigame compares total Combat Initiative (highest wins).
Snootee Customer Loyalty
This minigame counts the total number of items eaten from Chez Snootee this Season. They need not be different items.
Sooooper Sneaky
This minigame compares the total Combat Frequency modifiers; the most negative (noncombat) modifier wins.
The readout from the Information Booth is often used to spade new combat rate modifiers to determine their actual strength.
Space Tripper
This minigame compares each player's highest score on Space Trip this Season. The highest high score wins.
Spelunker
This minigame counts the total number of levels of Fernswarthy's Basement traversed during the Season.
Swimming with the Fishes
This minigame counts the total number of turns spent adventuring underwater this Season. (Adventuring without Fishy takes 2 turns and counts as 2 points.)
The Egg Hunt
This minigame assigns points based on total item drop bonus. It includes all equipment, passive skills, effects, intrinsics and Pasta Thralls, but does not include bonuses from familiars, minstrels or companions.
The number of "eggs" shown in the post-fight text is 3 + ceil(item/10) where item is the item drop bonus.
Upward Mobility Contest
This minigame counts total Fame Gained this season.
Fame Gained does not decrease when you lose Fame.
Verbosity Demonstration
This minigame counts the total length (in "characters") of the names of all equipment worn (including familiar equipment). The largest total wins.
"Characters" are not as straightforward as they may appear. Items with non-ASCII characters, or with HTML metacharacters, were originally counted according to their HTML-encoded names. Later, CDMoyer changed this.
What is it Good For?
This minigame counts the total number of turns spent fighting Hippy/Frat War opponents. This includes faxed enemies.
Who Runs Bordertown?
This minigame counts the total number of turns spent in Thugnderdome this Season.
Who Will Not Not Eat Them
This minigame counts green hamhocks eaten this Season.
Wine Tasting Contest
This minigame counts the number of different booze items drunk in the last 30 days, or since the start of the Season, whichever is later.
You can see which booze items you've drunk recently by going to your character sheet, clicking "Favorite Booze", scrolling down to the bottom, and clicking "Sort by Recentness of Consumption".
