A Jukebox

This jukebox has a staggering four songs available for play. Which one would you like to hear?

Material Orc

You press the button, but nothing happens. You shout "Heyyyyyy!" and hit the jukebox with your elbow, and it abruptly starts playing. You feel a brief urge to put on a white undershirt and a leather jacket, but it passes.

The jukebox plays the 1980's-era tune "Material Orc." You put on some legwarmers and listen while you dance like a maniac, maniac on the floor. It's a song all about how women don't like men who aren't wealthy. It's sung by a woman, though, so it's okay. You sing along with the chorus: "for I am wielding a material spork / And I am a material orc." It makes you more determined than ever to get as much meat as you can.

You acquire an effect: Material Witness (duration: 10 Adventures)

After hearing a song (presumably resets at rollovers)

You press the button, but nothing happens. You shout "Heyyyyyy!" and hit the jukebox with your elbow. Nothing continues to happen, but now your elbow hurts. Guess the thing is actually broken.

You lose 1 hit point.