Debasement (Haunted Sorority House)
It's not hard to make a basement scary. Basements are naturally pretty creepy anyway -- what with the poor lighting, and crumbling mortar in the damp cinderblock walls, and oddly-shaped shadows that are actually just piles of half-empty paint cans and old bicycle parts, but nevertheless always give you a start when you catch them out of the corner of your eye. You don't hardly have to decorate a basement at all for a haunted house. The sorority girls did anyway, though, adding a bunch of full-size cardboard coffins, and replacing all the light bulbs with red ones, making the place thoroughly creeptacular.
- If you haven't turned up the fog machine:
A faint hiss from the corner of the room leads you to a rented fog machine, which occasionally puffs out a small wisp of smoke. It's not particularly mood-enhancing, but maybe the sorority girls wanted to conserve the fog juice. That stuff is rip-off expensive, after all.
- If you have turned up the fog machine:
The room is also full of thick white clouds of artificial fog, and the nauseating sweet chemical smell that comes with it. You can barely see your hand in front of your face, and brief swirls and eddies in the smoke cause you to wonder if someone else is in here with you.
Besides the "coffins" scattered about, you also notice a door in the far wall, which someone has labelled, in magic marker on a sheet of notebook paper, "Scary Props" (followed by a fanged smiley-face).
| Check out the props room |
| Investigate the coffins |
- without plastic vampire fangs equipped:
As you approach the coffins, the lids slide open, and several vampire sorority girls slink out of them, making that duck-face that I guess is supposed to be a sultry pout. "Like, welcome to our lair, right?" one purrs as she wiggles up to you. "Let us introduce you to the pleasures of the night. And stuff."
"Okay," you say, "wanna play a board game? I've got Settlers of Cataan."
"Get lost, nerd," she says, then gets back in her coffin and slams the lid.
- with plastic vampire fangs equipped:
As you approach the coffins, the lids slide open, and several vampire sorority girls slink out of them, making that duck-face that I guess is supposed to be a sultry pout. "Like, welcome to our lair, right?" one purrs as she wiggles up to you. "Let us introduce you to the pleasures of the night. And stuff."
You shake your head and grin, and their heavily-linered eyes widen as you bare your vampire fangs at them. "Und vat can a creature such as yourzelf hope to teach me of ze pleasures of ze night?" you ask them. "I, who haff roamed zis vale of darkness for centuries? Come, my children, you vill learn nozzing cowering in zis basement. Come vith me, and ve shall soar away togezher into ze darkness!"
"Ohmigawd! That is so boss," the sorority girl says, and she and her friends follow you upstairs to a hall window that has been blacked out with construction paper taped to the glass.
"Now, my daughters ov ze night!" you say, "Open zis vindow, and ve shall fly free and rule ze shadows togezher!"
"Rockin'," the vampire girl says, and opens the window. It turns out to be quite a nice sunny day outside, and the vampire girls shriek and explode into sizzling clouds of ash. You feel just a little bit guilty about tricking them, but they probably would have all accidentally killed themselves with tanning beds within a week anyway.
- Subsequent times:
As you approach the coffins, the lids slide open, and several vampire sorority girls slink out of them, then stop short as they recognize you. "Hey!" one says, "You're the guy that tricked Monica and Becky and Candy into catching fire! That was so not cool! We were, like, BFFs!"
"So, you don't vant to come upstairs und fly avay vith me into ze glorious night?" you ask.
"No! Get lost, creep."
- If no vampires remain:
You cautiously knock on one of the coffins and ask "S'alright?"
There is no reply, so you cautiously open the lid. It's empty, which is pretty anticlimactic. You canvass the room, but it turns out all the coffins are empty. Oh well.
[Does not consume an Adventure.]
| Turn down the fog machine |
You turn the fog machine way down, and wave your arms around until the smoke clears enough to see. If you end up getting lung cancer from that crap, someone's gonna have a lawsuit on their hands.
| Turn up the fog machine |
You crank up the fog machine, filling the room with white mist. It smells terrible, but makes things much more spooky and atmospheric in here. Kind of like a crypt filled with burning cotton candy.
Occurs in The Haunted Sorority House.
Notes
- If either all sexy sorority vampires are defeated or you have defeated vampires with the plastic vampire fangs, the second adventure will not consume an adventure.
