Skeletons and The Closet
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Skeletons and The Closet
You look at the skeleton and decide that it's not dressed up enough. You rummage through your closet for something to put on it, and find a chest you hadn't noticed before. It is labeled:
"Magic equipment. Do not put on skeletons or they will come to life and it will be totally awesome."
Would you like to dress up the skeleton, in spite of this dire warning?
| A rusty sword and shield |
You dress him up!
 | You acquire an effect: Skeletal Warrior (duration: 30 Adventures) |
| A tattered mitre and flail |
You dress him up!
 | You acquire an effect: Skeletal Cleric (duration: 30 Adventures) |
| A gnarled wooden staff |
You dress him up!
 | You acquire an effect: Skeletal Wizard (duration: 30 Adventures) |
| A black cloak and a pair of knives |
You dress him up!
 | You acquire an effect: Skeletal Rogue (duration: 30 Adventures) |
| A T-shirt reading "The Weasel" |
You dress him up!
 | You acquire an effect: Skeletal Buddy (duration: 30 Adventures) |
| Never mind |
You decide to play with your dolls later. I mean your skeletons, sir.
Notes
- Accessed by using 1 Skeleton.
- Consumes 1 Skeleton, unless the "Never mind" choice is selected.
- Skeleton effects interact, and become more powerful if you have specific combinations of effects. (Exact interactions need more spading.)
| Skeleton | Start of Combat | Each Round | End of Combat | +Warrior | +Cleric | +Wizard | +Rogue | +Buddy |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Skeletal Warrior | Delevels enemy's attack by 10-12 | Attacks your opponent for 9-12 damage | +5 to Cleric's attack, +10 to Warrior's debuff | +5-6 Hot damage to Warrior's attack | Rogue attacks each round. 8-10 damage | +5 to Warrior's debuff and +5 to Warrior's attack. | ||
| Skeletal Cleric | Blessing (unknown effect) | Does 9-12 Hot Damage | Restores 13-15 HP | +5 to Cleric's attack, +10 to Warrior's debuff | +11 to Wizard's attack | +10 to Rogue's bonus meat | +10 to Cleric's HP restore | |
| Skeletal Wizard | Does 9-12 Cold Damage | Restores 5-6 MP | Adds +5-6 Hot Damage to Warrior's attack | +11 to Wizard's attack | Multiplies Rogue's initial attack by 1.5 (15% of monster's HP, minimum 15, maximum 1000) | +5 MP to Wizard's restore | ||
| Skeletal Rogue | Does damage equal to 10% of the monster's HP (minimum 10 damage, maximum 1000) at the beginning of combat, before the first round | Gives 15-20 meat at the end of combat; this effect applies even to enemies that do not drop any meat. | Attacks again each subsequent round. 8-10 damage | +10 to Rogue's bonus meat | Multiplies Rogue's initial attack by 1.5 (15% of monster's HP, minimum 15, maximum 1000) | +15 to Rogue's bonus meat drop | ||
| Skeletal Buddy | Delevels defense by 4-5 each round of combat. | Gives +2 stats per fight | +5 to Warrior's debuff and +5 to Warrior's attack. | +10 to Cleric's HP restore | +5 MP to Wizard's restore | +15 to Rogue's bonus meat drop |
References
- Although the exact class names have varied over the years, a Warrior, a Cleric, a Wizard, and a Rogue make up the iconic Dungeons & Dragons adventuring party.
- The quip about playing with dolls is likely a reference to Spaceballs.
- The title of this adventure refers to the idiom "skeletons in the closet."
