Terrible mutant

Terrible mutant
Monster ID	2096
Locations	When wearing an "I Voted!" sticker
Hit Points	75% of its Defense
Attack	Player's Moxie + 15 (cap at 1 000)
Defense	Player's Muscle + 15 (cap at 1 000)
Initiative	0
Meat	8-12
Phylum	humanoid
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	arm, body, head, leg
Drops	glob of undifferentiated tissue, glob of undifferentiated tissue, mutant arm, mutant legs, mutant crown
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting a terrible mutant

This horribly-mutated person is rambling manically -- the only bit you can really understand is "Iä Ich'Xuul'kor!" ...which is kind of weird, since that's not even close to being comprehensible words.

or

It's a little hard to tell, but you think maybe this used to be a human being? Apparently whatever alien vitamins the new mayor put in the drinking water didn't really agree with them. And by "didn't really agree" I mean "strenuously objected".

or

Judging from the look of this guy, Pork Elf DNA doesn't mix real great with human DNA. From what I hear, the tax break wasn't all that impressive, either.

or

The new mayor's health program seems to have had some strange effects on people. It's hard to tell if this result was purely an accident, or if they were actually trying to breed humans with extra necks.

or

Okay, so, it turns out that when you drink cough medicine and polio vaccine and insulin and laudanum and rubbing alcohol all at once, it does weird things to your body. Who knew?

Hit Message(s):

The mutant thrashes around wildly and gets in a couple lucky hits. Lucky for it, not you. Argh! Ow! Ow!

The mutant bashes you in the <ear> with its big muscly arm. ...Or is that a leg? Ugh! Ouch! Ugh! Ouch! Argh!

The mutant either punches you or stomps on you, and I'm not sure which. Argh! Ugh! Eek! Ugh! Ow!

Critical Hit Message:

The mutant roars and bashes you with all of its limbs at once! Which is tricky, but its weird bone structure allows it. (CRITICAL HIT!) Oof! Ow! Eek! Oof! Ouch!

Miss Message(s):

The mutant tries to kick you, but can't because that's an arm.

The mutant thrashes around wildly. You wait until it's finished.

The mutant tries to attack you, but trips over its own head.

Fumble Message:

The mutant tries to attack you, but has trouble figuring out its joints. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire an item: mutant arm (1% chance)*

You acquire an item: mutant legs (1% chance)*

You acquire an item: mutant crown (1% chance)*

(Only one of the 3 pieces of mutant equipment can drop per day)

You acquire an item: glob of undifferentiated tissue (100% chance)*

If you have acquired a piece of mutant equipment today:

You acquire an item: glob of undifferentiated tissue (?% chance)*

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Occurs every 11 adventures, if wearing an "I Voted!" sticker.

Notes

• You must have the arm equipped when fighting this monster to be eligible for the legs. You must have the legs equipped when fighting this monster to be eligible for the crown. You can only acquire 1 piece of mutant equipment per day.
• If both mutant arm and mutant legs are equipped, you will only receive a mutant crown.
• This monster has a significantly increased chance to hit, even when your moxie vastly exceeds its attack.
• This monster cannot be copied.