Your mission, Agent, should you choose to accept it (you have no choice), is to procure the latest mosquito larva from the Spooky Forest. Security is tight, and we can't tell you why we need it, but it's of the utmost importance. The coordinates are in this file.
Your next target is a local crime boss, the Boss Bat. He's gone deep underground in the Nearby Plains and built up an army of bats. He'll only live once, so kill him an[sic] bring back proof of unlife.
Subsequent times:
The Boss Bat is still alive isn't he? Do your job.
After defeating the Boss Bat:
Well done! You've brought us a view to your killing of the Boss Bat!
Word on the dark net is that the Knob Goblins, who normally keep to themselves over at Cobb's Knob, are planning a major military action against Seaside Town.
We need you to go deep under cover in the Knob, and using your license to kill on the Goblin King.
Double-Oh Three has determined that there is a secret entrance that will allow you to access the inside of the Knob. They recovered this map, but nobody knows how to read it.
You'll need to figure out how to decrypt the symbols on it if you're going to find that entrance, maybe some sort of Lektor machine or something.
Seems like there is a new terrorist cell in the Cyrpt, near the Misspelled Cemetary. We suspect there's a ring-leader activating all the local eternal-sleeper cells. Take this gadget from Q-Branch and root him out:
You're being sent to the Highlands. Black Angus is raising a stink and we can't afford the fallout if he decides to spill the beans about that other thing. Could you do us a favor and go to his tower, in the Highlands? The Highlands are just on the other side of the Orc Chasm. We'll mark it on your map.
Cross the Orc Chasm and do what it takes to make Angus happy.
Your name is <name>, right? LI-intercepted this weird message about you:
Agent, we need you go report to the Nearby Plains and investigate the current bout of anti-eco-terrorism. Giant piles of garbage keep falling from the sky, like some moonraker is up there knocking them down. It's your mission to stop this scourge.
Subsequent times:
Report back to the Nearby Plains and solve this ecological garbage crisis.
After completing the quest:
Well done, Agent. The garbage has stopped falling. Whatever you did it worked. Here's a token in honor of your service.
Agent <name>, we have a complicated mission for you. It seems the father of a distant lands spy has gone missing while searching for a powerful artifact, the Holy MacGuffin. We've stolen his diary and it's stuck in customs in the Distant Lands.
First, you'll need to obtain a forged identity from the Black Market, then travel from The Shore to obtain the diary. Once you've done that, you must impersonate the distant lands operative, the child of the diary's author, and follow the clues in the diary to obtain this Holy MacGuffin. We certainly don't want it to fall in to the hands of another agency.
Subsequent times:
Any luck impersonating the son of the distant lands agent and obtaining the MacGuffin based on the intel in his diary?
After completing the quest:
Excellent, Agent <name>. Now we can ship this MacGuffin off for storage at Area 52, so no one can use it.
His Majesty has ordered a ticker tape parade in your honor. But, nobody can know your identity or the roll[sic] you played. So, we sent an actor. We saved you this:
Ok, this mission is going to sound a little bit like the various terrorist and criminal plots that you're normally stopping... but we're the good guys, so it's OK.
We need you to incite war between the frat boys and the hippies. Totally destabilize the region. One you've done so, we'll have further orders.
Subsequent times:
The Mysterious Island still seems awfully stable. Do we need to send another agent? The world is not enough space for those groups to co-exist. This should be easy!
After starting the war:
Great, you've started the war.
Now end it.
No, seriously. Now that we've secretly started the war, we want to publicly end it. Talk to all the operatives on the island, kill a bunch of people, just make a big scene and end the war.
After defeating the hippies:
Good job Agent. We told you to make a big public spectacle of ending the war. The frat boys will be much easier to control with their numbers decimated. You deserve a medal!
You acquire... something. [[Data:{{{item}}}]]
After defeating the frat boys:
Good job Agent. We told you to make a big public spectacle of ending the war. The hippies will be much easier to control with their numbers decimated. You deserve a medal!
You acquire... something. [[Data:{{{item}}}]]
After defeating both sides:
Good job Agent. We told you to make a big public spectacle of ending the war. You deserve a medal!
Agent <name>! We've recently intercepted chatter suggesting that a shadowy figure is holding some sort of contest. We believe that this may be the leader of the secretive organization behind all the recent criminal activity. Your mission is to enter this contest and destroy this criminal. He's hosting the contest in the Lair of the Naughty Sorceress. If our sources our[sic] correct, he had her killed after one too many failures, and took over her lair.
Subsequent times:
Head to the Naughty Sorceress's lair and take care of the villain now residing there.
After completing the quest, but before freeing the king:
Greetings Agent <name>. We couldn't help but notice that you defeated "Blofeld" and then left the King trapped above the lair. You should probably head back there and free him when you get a chance. You do work for him, after all.
