The Fabulous Seven
You wake up bleary-eyed somewhere on the outskirts of BorderTown. You probably shouldn't have done those last couple dozen tequila shots. As your eyes focus, you see six strangely-dressed men standing in front of you. They're wearing cowboy hats with holes in them for their topknots; they're wearing chaps, but instead of pistols they're waving swords.
"Greetings, adventurer," their leader (a big, deeply tanned bald man with gold earrings) says. "We are looking for a fearless swordslinger, or perhaps gunsman, to join us on a little quest, et cetera. Would you be interested in helping us out? We need one more member to complete our party."
"What's the quest?" you ask.
"A bunch of bandits has been stealing food from the poor peasants," he says. "We want to track down the bandits, take back the food, and sell it back to the peasants."
"Don't you mean give it back to the peasants?" you ask.
The leader stares blankly at you. "You clearly don't know much about economics or capitalism, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera."
Since your moral compass is currently at the bottom of a sea of ethanol, you decide to join the raiding party, and take your share of the spoils.
 | You gain 50 Meat. |
Notes
- Occurs during St. Sneaky Pete's Day Stupor on St. Sneaky Pete's Day XI.
References
- The cowboy/samurai mixup is a reference to the 1960 western The Magnificent Seven, which is a remake of Akira Kurosawa's 1954 film Seven Samurai.
- The bald man with gold earrings is a reference to actor Yul Brynner, who not only appeared in The Magnificent Seven but also played King Mongkut of Siam (who used the phrase "et cetera, et cetera, et cetera" frequently) on Broadway in Rodgers and Hammerstein's musical The King and I, and in the 1956 movie of the musical.
