User:Hashimashadoo
Hashimashadoo (created August 26, 2004) is a Pastamancer in the online MMORPG Kingdom Of Loathing. He is a member of The Ugly Ducklings, and can be found most of the time in the chair in front of his computer.
Origins
"Hash" as he has come to be known has forgotten where he found out about KoL. He does however remember why he named himself thus. He was thinking about a username that wouldn't have been taken yet after half an hour of fruitless attempts his thoughts drifted and turned to something he heard somewhere at some point. Although its origins were dubious he was certain that this name would work. And so 'Hashimashadoo' was born! Using their ultra-super powers Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup dedicated their lives to fighting crime and the forces of evil. *Ahem* (Hash trailed off there for a second as he is oft to do). He later found out a friend had got it from an episode of Futurama and forced it into his unconcious mind. When he joined up he had just moved to an area in the middle of nowhere and used KoL to waste as much time as possible.
Biography
Hash is actually a gigolo. Thing is, the dumb ba*d is usually so drunk he forgets to ask for his money. According to the girls who know him 'that way' he's pretty good in the sack or wherever but he is continually trying to improve his technique. He only does girls that he likes (except in one particular case heh, heh, heh...) and always plays it safe (he is petrified of STDs. Some of the stories he has heard...Yeesh) One day he'd like to settle down with a nerd girl and finally grow up but that day won't come for a few years yet. Those who know him well know him as a kind and generous guy. Those who don't view him as an out and out freak of nature. He joined The Goddess' Knights in October and soon became a major presence in the 'Bored Out of Your Mind' forums. He was one of the few who was sad at the clan's demise but he quickly moved on to join The Ugly Ducklings and has reclaimed his place in the cloned 'Bored' section of their forums, recently becoming an admin (although so far he hasn't been doing incredibly well) He created a comic that had to go on an udetermined period of hiatus due to his studies (it'll be back soon folks, Promise). Hash is into metal music (whether heavy, goth or german, etc. He'll listen to anything except pop music though.) plays sports whenever he can and is planning on learning to surf in the summer (beach is just over there. Why not use it?) He is a strange breed of goth and...something else...in terms of his social circles. Noone can classify it and thats just the way he likes it. He is also heavily into RPGs and tabletop wargames having been a veteran of Warhammer for 10 years and Dungeons and Dragons for 4. Hash had a multi named n1nj4c0w for use as a pastamancer-sauceror duet but instead Hash discovered Knob Sausage Chow mein and the poor sauceror fell into disuse. Hash now uses n1nj to farm for meat on the icy peak. As previously mentioned, hash is a 'bit' of a drunkard. his favorite tipple is cider. He manages to drink it in VERY large quantities when he feels like it. He is also very blunt and honest, often to his own detriment.
Major Accomplishments
Hash has been notoriously unlucky in the kingdom after wasting his luck early on in his career when he didn't know jack about the game. He found himself heir to many rare items but not knowing their worth sold them all at the autosell value. Millions of meat in the gutter, he also wasted a lot of time in the outskirts of Cobb's Knob wondering why he was levelling so slowly and gaining only paltry amounts of meat from his adventures. Eventually he found out why and punched himself repeatedly for being such an idiot.
Quotes
"When life turns it's back on you... Sneak attack for extra damage."
"I wasn't born with enough middle fingers."
"Time for cake and sodomy."
Wrongly Attributed
Hash is not a faggot, just because he kisses guys and prefers a girl's eyes to her mammary glands does not make him a faggot. He has many homosexual friends and considers it an insult to them as well as himself when referred to as such. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Hash does NOT enjoy smearing tacos all over his pallid flesh.
Current Goals
To get his filthy mitts on a rare item that everyone who joined before Crimbo 2k4 hasn't got now and NOT get brutally ass raped for it.
External Links
http://www.somethingpositive.net
http://www.ghastlycomic.com (Not suitable for work!)
Finally
Any British girls in the region of Cornwall are welcome to hash's services as long as they promise not to ply him with liquor beforehand.
Writing in the third person is fun.
Not so finally: Updates!
At the moment hash is pissed about all the work he has to do.
