Who killed (Victim)?/messages

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This page documents all possible responses from the Who killed (Victim)? choice encounter.

Need messages for each character for the following categories (all seem to be in sets of 3):

  • Location Intro (first time)
  • Location Intro (returning)
  • Him/Herself (positive)
  • Him/Herself (negative)
  • Name (positive, gives relation)
  • Name (negative, gives relation)
  • Name (negative, gives location)
  • Name (positive, gives location)
  • Relation (negative, gives name)
  • Relation (positive, gives name)
  • Relation (negative, gives location)
  • Relation (positive, gives location)
  • Killer (no idea)
  • Killer (suspect's name)
  • Killer (suspect's relation)
  • When arrested

Suspect: Bertie (suspect_bertie.gif, suspect_bertie_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • When you enter the Lounge, you find a young man dressed in crisp tennis whites, idly bouncing a tennis ball on a racket and whistling a jaunty little tune. <dossier message>
  • In the Pantry you meet a young woman dressed in crisp tennis whites, relaxing and leafing idly through a fashion magazine, apparently without a care in the world. <dossier message>
  • You enter the Smoking Lounge and encounter a well-to-do-looking young man dressed in crisp tennis whites, lounging casually across an overstuffed chair and flipping playing cards into a straw boater -- or rather, attempting to, and largely missing. <dossier message>

Then one of:

  • "Excuse me," you say, and he looks up at you, surprised.
    "Oh, I say! You must be with the police! Jolly good! Frightful business, just dreadful. What can I do for you?"
  • "I'd love a spot of tea, if you've got one handy," she says, then looks up at you and practically jumps to her feet in surprise. "Oh, I say! I do beg your pardon, that was dreadfully silly of me -- I thought you were the butler at first."
    "I'm a detective, investigating the murder of <Vic Full Name>," you say.
    "Jolly good show! What a dreadful mess this has all been, what?"
  • She looks up, and seems rather surprised. "Hullo! Are you with the police?"
    "That's right," you say, shaking her proffered hand. "I'm the detective in charge of the case. I'll need to ask you a few questions."
    "Well! By all means, ask away, old chap!"
Returning

One of:

  • The victim's accountant, <Full Name>, is pacing around the Pantry with her hands behind her back, apparently looking for some means of entertaining herself. Her eyes light up when she sees you enter.
  • When you return to the Pantry, the victim's accountant, <Full Name>, is tapping her fingers on the table, miming a piano and humming along. "Dee-dum bum BUM!" she says when she sees you, finishing the song with a flourish.
  • You return to the Pantry, and find <Victim First Name>'s accountant, <Full Name>, snoozing on a couch with her straw boater over her face. You clear your throat loudly, and she pushes up the brim of the hat and blinks at you.

Then one of:

  • "What-ho, Detective!" she says with a grin. "I was wondering when you'd be popping back around for more of the old Q and A!"
  • "I say!" she says. "Back for more questions, are you?"
    "Yes, I'm sorry to disturb you, but --"
    "Oh, no apologies needed, my good Detective! I've never been what you might call 'murder-adjacent' before! It's bally exciting!"
  • "Hallo hallo!" she says, grinning. "Back for round two, are you? I must say, this is exciting!"
Him/Herself (positive)
  • "Gosh, yes!" <First Name> says. "Positively delightful, was old <Victim First Name>. This grand old edifice simply won't be the same without her knocking about in it!"
  • "Oh, rather, yes!" <First Name> says. "Old <Victim First Name> threw the most smashing parties! I tell you, if anyone manages to usurp her as reigning party-throwing champion of this century, why, I'll eat my hat! ...Not this one, of course. I quite like this one."
  • "Well, I should say so!" <First Name> says. "Old <Victim First Name> was a jolly good friend, we've known each other for simply ages! Lovely person, absolutely spiffing."
Him/Herself (negative)
  • "Did we get along? Huh, well!" Makayla rolls her eyes theatrically. "I'd say we got along like a horse on fire! Eh? 'Horse on fire'? That's quite a good one, you should write that down!"
  • "Ho, my goodness no," Makayla says. "One shouldn't speak ill of the dead and all, but well -- I honestly haven't any other sort of speak for that frightful old codger!" A worried shadow suddenly passes over her face. "By Jove, you don't think they'll expect me to speak at the funeral, do you?"
  • "Huh! Did I get along with Billy Bob Thompson?" Makayla exclaims. "You might just as well ask if Genghis Khan got along well with... umm... well. Whoever it was that Genghis Khan was so bally angry at!"
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Lovely woman, Jessica Holmes. Always stands her round, wouldn't say a word against her," Makayla says. "Did you know she's Billy Bob's chauffeur? I was flabbergasted when I found out!"
  • "Oh yes, Jessica Holmes's a positive delight!" Makayla says. "Why, I could tell you some real stories, Detective!"
    "That won't be necessary," you say.
    "Just as well. I'd forgotten you were a policeman for a moment."
  • "Certainly!" Makayla says. "Marvelous woman, just brilliant. She's Billy Bob's chauffeur, did you know that? Wouldn't think it to look at her! But it's like the Greeks said, you know, Detective."
    "...What did they say?"
    "Hmm? Oh, I don't speak a word of Greek. Something about columns, I expect."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Great Scott, do you mean Old Billy Bob's neighbor?" Makayla says. "Well, here's what I have to say about that particular bounder, Detective: Hmph! And furthermore, tut!"
  • "Oh, that scallywag," Makayla says. "He's Billy Bob's neighbor, you know -- and a boor, and a bore, and a bounder to boot!"
  • "Hmm," Makayla muses. "Hmm and also hmm. Oh, steady on, do you mean Old Billy Bob's neighbor? Hah! No, Detective -- you'd need to pay me a fair penny just to stand behind him in a queue!"
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Detective, you won't find a better man with whom to share a pint than Niles Romero," Makayla says. "Well, two pints. One for each of you. Hah! Drinking the same pint, that'd be ridiculous! When you see him in the Ballroom, tell him I said that, he likes a good laugh."
  • "Certainly I know Niles Romero!" Makayla says. "He's the feline's nightclothes, I don't mind telling you. A pollen purveyor's leg-hinges! A... Well, I can't think of another one. He's in the Ballroom."
  • "Oh, we go way back, Detective," Makayla says. "All the way back! Practically antediluvian, he and I! If you see him in the Ballroom, give him a 'What-ho!' from me, won't you?"
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Well, there's nothing like a good friend, Detective," Makayla says, "and that creature currently residing within the Living Room is nothing like a good friend!"
  • "Madison Everett is less a person, and more a sort of angry vole," Makayla says. "That twitching nose, those beady little eyes... Go have a look in the Living Room, Detective -- you'll find the resemblance positively uncanny!"
  • "I stay bloody well away from that character, Detective," Makayla says, "if you'll excuse the 'bloody'. Could set your hat alight with a glare, she could. She's in the Living Room, go see for yourself!"
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Personal assistant, personal assistant. Hmm," Makayla ponders. "No, sorry Detective, I don't know who that is, dash it all. ...Oh! Unless you mean Niles Romero? Now that you mention it, I do seem to remember something about him being Billy Bob's personal assistant. Well there you go! That must be it."
  • "That's Niles Romero, isn't it?" Makayla asks. "Don't know him well, Detective, but he seems quite respectable. Stable sort, plenty of atoms up in the old thinkpiece."
  • "Unless I'm well off the mark, you're referring to Niles Romero," Makayla says. "Can't say I know him very well, I regret to inform. Seems nice enough."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh, him," Makayla says with a slight grimace. "That little blighter goes by the name Jonas Lindsay, Detective. Nasty piece of work. Face like a horse. And I shall leave the question of which bit of the horse to your own deductive prowess."
  • "Oh, that's a rotten one there, Detective," Makayla says. "Calls himself 'Jonas Lindsay', but is that even his legitimate moniker? ... ...Well, yes, probably. Can't quite imagine someone calling themselves 'Jonas Lindsay' by choice, can you?"
  • "Do you mean Jonas Lindsay, Detective?" Makayla asks. "Well! I'm not one to tell tales out of school, but well. Hmph! Yes. Tch! With perhaps a Hoh! and Tsk! for good measure."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Oh yes! Yes, quite well," Makayla says. "What was the name... hmm... Began with an S, I believe. Or an R? ...No, it's no good, I'm afraid, old chap. You'll have to go to the Wine Cellar and ask for yourself."
  • "Why yes, we get along splendidly," Makayla says. "If we're thinking of the same person, that is. With the um? In the Wine Cellar? Is that the one?"
  • "Oh certainly, certainly," Makayla says. "Indubitably, even, if I'm correct in assuming that to be a word. Spends a lot of time in the Wine Cellar, don't you know. Yes yes, we're quite close."
    "Do you know their name?" you ask.
    "Haven't the foggiest."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Detective," Makayla says as sternly as she can muster, "Billy Bob's child is the very reason I'm in here and not in the Living Room. Absolutely frightful individual."
  • "I'm afraid I could no more stand to be in the Living Room with that person than a snowman could stand to vacation within a fizzing volcano, Detective," Makayla declares.
  • "As concerns the individual currently occupying the Living Room, Detective," Makayla says, "allow me to say one word: balderdash."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Haven't the foggiest, Detective," Stan says. "Not the slightest idea. Not a tiddle, nor a jot. I could no more tell you the name of Jessica's murderer than I could tell you the--"
    "I get it," you grumble.
  • "Who murdered Jessica?" Stan asks. "Hmm. Well now. Was it Louis Tanner?"
    You flip through your dossier. "Who the devil's that?"
    "Made it up. Sorry, it was a shot in the dark."
  • "You want to know... who do I...?" Stan looks flummoxed. "Sorry, old bean. I can certainly understand why you'd ascribe me a certain Sherlockian intelligence, but I haven't the first clue of who might have done that deed."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Well now, I'm not sure it would be right to be a squealer, Detective," Makayla says. "Not quite cricket, you know. ...Then again, neither is murder, what? Very well, you've forced my hand. It was Ava Gregory."
  • "Who put paid to old Billy Bob? Well, that's quite a question, isn't it Detective?" Makayla says. "I mean, it could be bally anyone, and there's quite a quantity of people on this old ball of rock we call Earth."
    "...We're pretty sure it was someone in this house," you say.
    "Oh! Well, it was Ava Gregory, then."
  • "You want to know who I think did it?" Makayla says, looking surprised. "Well, that's a rum go. I hadn't even considered the question. I suppose it must've been Ava Gregory, though, mustn't it? Stands to reason."
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "It was Travis's gardener, Detective," Sarah says. "And that's the honest truth, not a fib to get out of an unpleasant betrothal arrangement, I assure you."
  • "It's interesting you should ask me that, Detective, because I was just asking myself the very same," Sarah says. "The identical, as it were."
    "...And?"
    "Hmm?"
    "Who killed Travis Duncan?"
    "Oh! It was the gardener, of course. Terribly sorry, I thought you already knew."
  • "Who did it, Detective? Well yes, that's the question, isn't it?" Sarah says. "That's the query whizzing around everyone's racetrack today. Who put the nails in poor old Travis's coffin. Well, well. And might I add, well."
    "...You don't know, do you?"
    "Oh, certainly. It was the gardener."
When arrested

"I say, what?" Riley looks aghast as the Offers Chaps enter the room and handcuff her. "Here now, this is balderdash! Absolute bloody piffle! You can't do this!"

As the officers haul her out the door, she shouts "Somebody call my valet! Quickly!"

Suspect: Eeyore (suspect_eeyore.gif , suspect_eeyore_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • As you enter the Billiard Room, a woman in a drab gray suit looks up at you from the chair she's slouched in, and sighs.
  • In the Smoking Lounge you find a pale, drably-dressed man slouched on a small chair. He looks up at you as you enter, and sighs pathetically.
  • You enter the Hall Closet, and find a woman dressed in a shapeless gray suit, slouched on a chair and staring at her feet.

Then <dosier message>.

Then one of:

  • "Great, here we go," she says morosely. "You'll probably put the blame for this on me, same as everyone always does when anything goes wrong around here."
  • "It's just one more thing after another, isn't it?" she mutters bitterly. "It always rains, and it always pours."
    "Well, I can see you're going to be a real barrel of laughs," you say.
  • "Might as well get it over with and put the cuffs on me now," he mutters, holding up his wrists.
    "Is this a confession?" you frown.
    "No. I didn't do anything. But I never do anything, and I get blamed for it anyway. It's just how it goes. I'm used to it."
Returning

One of:

  • As you enter the Billiard Room, the victim's best friend, <Full Name>, looks up from her shoes and regards you with gray eyes.
  • <Full Name>, the victim's best friend, looks up as you enter the Billiard Room.
  • You enter the Billiard Room, where the victim's best friend, <Full Name>, is still slouched on a small uncomfortable-looking chair.

Then one of:

  • "Well, now what?" she asks. "I don't know how this day could get any worse, but I'm sure it'll happen anyway."
  • "You again," she says. "How could this day get any worse?"
    "Well," you remark dryly, "you could have been the one murdered."
    "You think that would be worse?"
  • "You again," she mutters. "Did the others manage to pin everything on me yet? It's only a matter of time."
  • (occasionally, two of above in a row, bugged?)
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "She'd ask me how I was doing, once in a while," she replies. "And I'd tell her. In detail. Our conversations never went much beyond that."
  • "She pretty much just ignored me," she replies. "So yeah, comparatively speaking, we got along okay I suppose."
  • "Yeah, I guess," she says. "I mean, she hated me just like everyone else, but she was polite about it. She didn't go out of her way to make me miserable."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • Alvin shakes his head. "We never talked. That's not unusual, though. Nobody ever talks to me."
    "I wonder why," you mutter.
    "I don't.
  • Alvin shrugs. "I was her neighbor. She hated me. That's par for the course, though. "
  • "Not very well," comes the reply. "She hardly ever spoke to me. But I don't blame her. I wouldn't either."
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "I know Billy Bob Banks, yeah," he says. "He's Jessica's business partner. I get less verbal abuse from him than from the others. Which is nice of him."
  • "Oh, Billy Bob Banks is actually a good person, at least compared to everyone else around here," Alvin says. "He's Jessica's business partner. He actually does what he's supposed to, instead of expecting me to do it. That's worth a lot in my book. Well, a little."
  • "That's Jessica's business partner," Alvin says. "He's all right. Never inflicted actual physical harm on me."
    "Err... do the others?" you ask.
    "Well, no. But they'd like to. I can tell."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • Alvin shudders. "She's Jessica's lawyer. She's horrible. At least she's horrible to me. Now that I think about it, in that respect she's no different from anyone else, really."
  • "Ugh," Alvin mutters. "I don't know how Jessica got stuck with a lawyer like her. Of course, I don't know how she got stuck with a neighbor like me, either. Unlucky, I suppose."
  • "Yeah, that's Jessica's lawyer," Alvin replies. "Not that you'd know it. I'm the one who does all the work around here. But do I get any thanks? No, of course not. Just the blame."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "He'll be in the Smoking Lounge," he says. "You'll probably have a very nice conversation with him. Not that I ever have. But he seems like a man someone could have a nice conversation with. Someone other than me."
  • "He's in the Smoking Lounge," Harold says. "I like him -- he doesn't immediately blame me when things go wrong around here. As they inevitably do. And as everyone else inevitably does."
  • "I don't know him very well, because he never talks to me," he replies. "Which is okay. I don't expect him to take any interest in me. Why should he, I'm just the only one who does any work around here, after all. He's probably in the Smoking Lounge, having a grand old time."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I don't know much," he replies. "She avoids me like the plague. Like the world's most boring plague. 'World's Most Boring Plague,' I wouldn't be surprised if that was her nickname for me. She's probably in the Master Bedroom. That's where I'd be, if I was here and I wanted to avoid me."
  • "I know she's in the Master Bedroom. And that she hates me. Fair's fair, I don't like her much either. Or myself, come to think of it. So we've got that much in common, at least."
  • "Yeah, I know Gabriella Lester," he replies. "I bet she'll tell you she doesn't know me, though. Probably considers me beneath her notice. Go on and ask her, you'll see. She's in the Master Bedroom."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Golf caddy..." Alvin mutters. "...Oh, you mean Clive Prince. Sure, I know him. I mean, as well as I know anybody, which isn't very well, but he says hello to me sometimes, and that's more than I get from most people."
  • "That's Clive Prince," he replies. "I had an entire conversation with him once. Not a long one. And I was doing most of the talking. But still, I guess that counts for a little something."
  • "Oh, he's great. Just great," Alvin says. "Everyone loves Clive Prince."
    "...I can't tell if you're being sarcastic."
    "Yeah, me neither," he sighs.
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "...Oh. You're talking about Chloe Palmer," Tomas says. "Well, if you're expecting me to say anything nice about her, I won't."
    "I wasn't."
  • "That's Chloe Palmer. Totally useless. She just sits around all day while everyone else does all the work. And by 'everyone else' I mean me."
  • "The only chauffeur I'm aware of around here is Chloe Palmer, and she isn't much of one if you ask me."
    "I don't think I will."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Jessica's business partner?" Alvin says. "We don't talk much. Well, we don't talk at all. But they've never said anything mean to me. Never said anything to me."
    "Are you certain this person actually exists?" you ask.
    "Oh, I've seen them, yeah. In the Foyer."
  • "I don't have a single unkind word to say about that person," Alvin says.
    "Do you have anything at all to say about them?"
    "No. Well, they're probably in the Foyer. Does that count?"
  • "I don't know much about them," Alvin says. "They mostly avoid me. I mean, everyone does, but they're better at it than most. You might find them in the Foyer."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "They're in the Master Bedroom," he mutters. "Probably leaving cigarette butts everywhere. And who do you think will be expected to clean them up? You're a detective -- go ahead and guess."
  • "Ugh," Alvin mutters. "Well, if you want to talk to them, they're in the Master Bedroom, but I can't think of anyone I'd want to talk to less."
    "I can," you mutter.
  • "You'll find them in the Master Bedroom, if you want to talk to them," Alvin says. "Though why you would want to do that is beyond me. I'd rather throw myself out of a window. ...Actually, I might do that anyway."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "I don't know who killed Jessica, but I do know they'd have saved me a lot of trouble if they'd killed me too. Guess they couldn't be bothered to waste the bullet or whatever."
  • "I don't have any idea," he says, "but I guarantee if you ask anyone else, they'll all say it was me. That's how it goes around here. I do all the work, and do I get any of the credit? No, don't bother answering, it's a rhetorical question and the answer is perfectly obvious anyway."
  • "Who killed Jessica Shaffer? You're asking me? Why not ask me something I know the answer to, like who's supposed to clean the toilets around here. The answer to that is not, in fact, me, but guess what? I end up having to do it anyway."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Oh, is that all you want to know?" Harold asks. "All right. It was Willie Gamble. Go ahead and make a big show about how you solved the case all by yourself with your big detective skills, I don't expect to receive any credit for the information."
  • "Yeah, it's not enough that I have to do everything else around here, I might as well solve the murder for the detective too," Harold grumbles. "It was Willie Gamble. There. Happy?"
  • "You want to know who I think killed Nicky?" Harold asks. "Yeah, sure. Why not? I might as well tell you, what do I care anyway? It was Willie Gamble. Take 'em away, it's one less person I'll have to clean up after in this place."
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "It was Jasmine's cousin," Melanie says. "Does it make you happy to know that? If it does, please let me know, because having never experienced that emotion myself, it's difficult for me to detect it in others."
  • "Well," Melanie says, "if I tell you, what's in it for me?"
    "Nothing."
    "Oh good, my standard compensation. Okay, it was Jasmine's cousin."
  • "Well gosh," Melanie says, her eyes widening. "Do you actually expect me to rat out one of my precious friends and/or colleagues?"
    "...Are you joking?"
    "Yes. Jasmine's cousin killed her."
When arrested

"Oh, great. Marvelous," Brianna says as the Officers Chaps enter the room on cue, and cuff her hands behind her back. "Yeah. That's exactly what I figured would happen. It's nice when things go how you expect, isn't it? Yayyyyyyy. Oh well, I suppose I should look on the bright side -- I might get the death penalty, right?"


Suspect: Shifty (suspect_shifty.gif, suspect_shifty_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • Inside the Sunroom you find a woman pacing around and smoking a cigarette. As you enter, she turns and shoots you that particular grin that people use when they're extremely nervous, but are trying to play it cool.
  • You enter the Breakfast Nook and meet a woman dressed in cheap knockoff versions of the latest rich peoples' fashions.
  • You enter the Laundry Room. The woman inside stands to greet you, but her gaze doesn't seem to want to meet your own, flickering around you like a rat sizing up a trap.

Then one of <dossier messages>.

Then one of:

  • "Good, good," she says. "I'm glad you're here, Officer."
    "Detective."
    "Right! Right, of course, Detective, sorry. What a terrible thing that happened, just awful. But I'm sure you'll get to the bottom of it right away, yeah?"
    "Hopefully, yes," you say. "I'd like to ask you a few questions."
    "Sure, sure! Ask away, Detective, I've got nothin' to hide!"
  • "Boy, am I glad to see you!" she says. "I just can't believe someone would do this to dear old Anna. Listen, if there's anything I can do to help, anything at all, you just let me know."
    "Well," you say, "I would like to ask you some questions."
    "Questions? Oh, er, right! Yeah, sure, ask away! Always happy to cooperate with the police, that's me!"
  • "Hey, what took ya so long?" she asks. "Hah, nah, just kiddin' with ya. I know you boys have got a tough job, always had a deep respect for the boys in blue. Anything you wanna know, just ask me -- Sophie Whitley. Nobody knows what's going down around this place like I do."
Returning

One of:

  • As you enter the Breakfast Nook, <Full Name>'s demeanor instantly shifts from nail-biting anxiety to the coolest cucumber in the crop. "Welcome back, Detective," says <Victim First Name>'s boss. "Just couldn't keep away from ol' <First Name>, eh? What can I do ya for?"
  • As you enter the Breakfast Nook, the victim's boss, <Full Name>, hurriedly stands up from the bookcase she was rifling through. "Oh, hey there Detective!" she says. "I was just, ah, lookin' for a magazine. What can I do for you?"
  • You return to the Breakfast Nook, where <Vic Full Name>'s boss, <Full Name>, is adding another butt to a rapidly-filling ashtray.

Then one of:

  • "I need to ask you some more questions," you say.
    "Hey, you got it! Never let it be said that <Full Name> wasn't one hundred percent on-board when it comes to helping the cops -- I mean, police," she says, grinning broadly at you.
  • "Got a couple more questions for you," you say.
    "Oh sure, sure! Anything you need, Detective, I'm your woman. Whaddya wanna know?"
  • "Few more things I need to ask you, if that's all right," you say.
    "Hey, no problem!" <First Name> says. "Ask away, Detective, I'm an open book here."
Him/Herself (positive)
  • "Oh yeah, absolutely!" <First Name> says. "<Vic First Name> was a prince of a woman, absolute saint. Me and her, we were practically best friends! Anybody in this house'll tell ya the same."
  • "Heck, me and ol' <Vic First Name>, we were best pals!" <First Name> exclaims. "This big fancy mansion just isn't gonna be the same without her."
  • "Oh for sure, we got along great!" <First Name> says. "We were thick as thie- er, thick as... things. Best buds, that's me and ol' <Vic First Name>."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "Ahh, you know, Jessica went her way and I went mine, Detective," Sophie says. "You know how it is."
  • "Nah, me and Jessica, we didn't really see eye-to-eye, Detective," Sophie says. "I mean, we didn't fight or nothin', no bad blood, but we didn't share a lot of opinions on stuff."
  • "Sheesh, not hardly!" Sophie says, rolling her eyes. "I barely knew the woman, to be honest with ya, Detective. Just one of those things, you know?"
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Oh sure, Jessica's neighbor, I know him pretty well," she says. "She's a real straight-shooter. Real trustworthy."
  • "Sure, sure, we get along great," Sophie says. "Ever since he first became Jessica's neighbor. Practically inseparable, him and me."
  • "Yeah, that's Jessica's neighbor," Sophie says. "He's good people. Dependable, you know?"
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Yeah, that's Billy Bob's gardener," she replies. "Don't care much for her. She's a crook, if you ask me."
  • "Oh, you mean Billy Bob's gardener?" Gabrielle asks. "I know of her, but that's about it. We ain't what you'd call 'chummy'."
  • Gabrielle rolls her eyes. "Pfft. Yeah, I know Makayla Delacruz. That's Billy Bob's gardener. I trust that woman about as far as I can throw her."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Ah yeah, Gabriella Lester's great, just great," Sophie says. "Go check out the Study, that's where she is. See for yourself how great she is."
  • "Oh sure!" Sophie says. "That woman's a real peach. She's over in the Study -- tell her I said hi."
  • "Oh yeah, me and Gabriella Lester, we get along great!" Sophie says. "Two peas in a pod, that's us. She'll be in the Study, tell her I sent ya."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Ugh, yeah, I know Billy Bob Banks," Sophie says. "He's in the Breakfast Nook. If he says anything about me, though, it's a total lie."
  • "Who? Oh, right. I know who ya mean," she replies. "We don't pal around -- he's not really my cup of tea. He's in the Breakfast Nook, though, if you wanna meet him yourself."
  • "Yeah, I know him," Sophie says. "Don't care much for him, though. He's up to something shifty, if you ask me. Probably skulking around the Breakfast Nook."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Neighbor... Neighbor..." Gabrielle mutters. "...Oh! You mean Ava Gregory! Heck, we're such good pals I practically forgot she's Billy Bob's neighbor!"
  • "D'you mean Ava Gregory?" Gabrielle asks. "She's great, a real riot. You need someone to watch your back, that's who you need, is Ava Gregory."
  • "Oh sure, that's Ava Gregory," she says. "Me and her, we go way back. Waaay back. Can't say enough good things about her."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Ah. Yeah. I know who you mean," she replies. "His name's Alvin Sharp. I don't recommend you waste your time with him though, Detective. That ain't gonna be a, whaddyacallit -- a profitable endeavor."
  • "Jessica's business partner... Oh. You mean Alvin Sharp," Sophie says, shaking her head. "Yeah, no. I don't need the stress, know what I mean?"
  • "Sheesh," Sophie grumbles. "Yeah, I know Alvin Sharp. Know him like a kick in the teeth. Got about as much need for him, too."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "I don't know them real well," Sophie says, "but we run into each other from time to time, sure. They're alright. Check in the Attic."
  • "Oh sure," Sophie says. "Jessica's sibling is great. I don't know them much more than to say hello to, but I can tell they're a decent sort. Check in the Attic, if you wanna chat."
  • "Yeah, I know Jessica's sibling," Sophie says. "Not real well, but we've chatted. Charming, real charming type. Probably in the Attic, if I hadda guess."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Nah, I got no use for them," Gabrielle says. "Nothin' but trouble. Probably hangin' around the Ballroom, if you've got time to waste."
  • "I know who that is, Detective, but we don't talk much," Gabrielle says. "Try the Ballroom, they're usually skulking around there."
  • "Hmm," Gabrielle muses. "I think I know who you mean, Detective, but I dunno them real well. I think they're in the Ballroom, though."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Ahh, well now, I'm afraid I can't help ya there, Detective," Sophie says. "I was all the way on the other side of the house when it happened, and I didn't hear a thing. Sorry."
  • "Nah, 'fraid I can't help ya there, Detective," Sophie says. "I mean, I know, and I'll absolutely tell ya anything else ya wanna know, but my rep'll take a real dive if people think I'm a rat, you know what I'm sayin'?"
  • "Well gee, Detective," Sophie says, "I hate to disappoint ya, but I haven't got a clue who could've done it. Far as I know, everyone in this house loved Jessica like a brother. Or a sister, or whatever."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "All right, Detective, all right," Jack grins. "Ya dragged it out of me. The killer was Ricky Graves. And I trust you'll remember how helpful I was to you, if we should ever cross paths again!"
  • "All right, well, I'm trusting you to keep my name out of this, Detective," Jack says. "My life wouldn't be worth a plugged nickel if the wrong people found out I told you this. But it was Ricky Graves. I can't risk tellin' ya any more than that."
  • "Well now!" Jack says, glancing around the room and over his shoulder. "Ain't every day a police detective asks my opinion on a thing like that! Sorry though, I just don't know what to tell ya. *cough*Ricky Graves*cough*"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Well now," Clive says, "I wouldn't wanna be tellin' tales outta school, Detective. I haven't got any evidence for this, y'unnerstand. But if ya ask me -- which you did -- I'd say it was Ted's child."
  • "Well I gotta say, Detective, I wasn't expecting such a direct line of questioning," Clive says. "Tell ya what, I'll give ya a hint: check out Ted's child."
  • "Well Detective, you know what they always say," he says with a twinkle in his eye. "The child did it!"
    "...Is that what they always say?"
    "Something like that, yeah. Pretty sure."
When arrested

"Hey, what? Is this a joke?"

"No joke," you say as the Officers Chaps enter the room and put the handcuffs on Gabriella's wrists.

"You can't do this!" she protests loudly. "I'm an innocent woman! I didn't do nothin' -- this is a frame job! I'll have your badge for this! I got friends in high places, just you wait and see!"

Suspect: Nancy Drew (suspect_nancydrew.gif, suspect_nancydrew_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • You enter the Sunroom, and encounter a young woman -- very young, barely a teenager -- who is creeping around in a half-crouch, inspecting the furniture with a large magnifying glass.
  • Inside the Ballroom, you meet a young man, maybe 13 or 14 years old, who is methodically tilting every book in a bookcase, as though trying to find the trigger for a secret door.
  • Inside the Boiler Room, you discover a young woman, about 14 years old, give or take, who appears to be dusting a glass-topped coffee table for prints with a homemade fingerprinting kit.

Then one of <dossier messages>.

Then one of:

  • "Looking for clues?" you ask.
    "Yep!" she says. "I'm gonna bring that ol' murderer to justice! Say -- are you a real-life police detective?"
    "That's me," you say, and her eyes widen when you show her your badge. "Sorry to spoil your fun, but I need you to stay in here while I investigate."
    "Aw, gee willikers! Do I have to?" she pouts.
  • He looks up at you, and his eyes widen with surprise. "Ooh! You must be the police detective assigned to the case!"
    "That's me," you say, showing your badge.
    "Great! I'm gonna be a real big help, you'll see!"
    "As long as you stay in here while doing it," you say. "Sorry, but I can't have you running around during the investigation."
    "Aw, that's okay," he says. "I'll just sneak out while you aren't watching, dodge the guards, and come back before you've realized I'm gone!"
  • "What are you doing?" you ask him.
    "Looking for clues! I'm pretty sure Nicky Duncan was murdered, and I'm going to track down who did it!"
    "Well, you're right, it was a murder. I'm the detective in charge of the case."
    "Gosh!"
    "Yeah," you say. "Sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to stay in this room while I'm investigating."
    "Aww, gee," he says, disappointed. "Well, that's okay. I bet I can figure it out from here, if I put my mind to it!"


Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Sunroom, and find the victim's ex-boss, Brooke Cox the Kid Detective, quickly brushing dirt off of her knees.
  • You return to the Sunroom just in time to see Brooke Cox, the Kid Detective and the victim's ex-boss, quickly shutting a window and adjusting her cardigan.
  • When you return to the Sunroom, Kid Detective Brooke Cox, the victim's ex-boss, is sitting on a sofa twiddling her thumbs with a very innocent expression on her face.
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "Timmy was really great, Detective!" Brooklyn says. "He really encouraged me to follow my dreams of being the world's greatest detective! I used to shadow his business rivals for him all the time!"
  • "Golly, yes!" she says. "We got along ever so well! I can't imagine why anyone would want to murder him! Except for greed, I suppose. Or revenge for some failed business deal. Or the fact that he was blackmailing about a jillion different people..."
  • "Oh gosh, yes!" Brooklyn exclaims. "Timmy was always very nice to me! He gave me this fancy magnifying glass for my birthday!" She shows you the large brass-collared magnifier with pride.
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "Jessica Shaffer was a mean ol' jerk," Merle scowls. "I wouldn't even be trying to solve this case, if I didn't believe in truth and justice so much!"
  • "No, she was pretty mean to just about everybody, Detective," Merle says. "She threatened to have me sent away to military school!"
  • Merle scowls. "She was real mean, Detective. I'm honestly not surprised someone killed that mean old jerk."
    "Well, that's not a very nice thing to say," you frown.
    "Oh, gosh, you're right! I'm sorry, Detective," he sniffs.
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Oh sure, I know Peyton Alvarez!" Merle says. "She's the victim's gardener. She's way at the bottom of my suspects list, though. I don't think she has it in her to kill."
  • "She's the victim's gardener," Merle says. "She is pretty friendly. I haven't found anything to tie her to the scene of the crime yet."
  • "That's Jessica Shaffer's gardener!" Merle says. "She's really very nice, once you get to know her! Or once you follow her around for a while, peeking out from behind lampposts and stuff."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Shucks, Detective!" Paul says, "I know a bunch of stuff about him! He's the victim's cousin, and he has a lot of gambling debts to some very dangerous people!"
  • "Sure, I know who that is!" he says. "That's Nicky Duncan's cousin. He has a pretty good motive for the murder, what with the life insurance and all!"
  • "Yeah, I know who that is!" Paul says. "That's the victim's cousin, and he's real suspicious! Did you know he's been married like six times? And two of his spouses died in mysterious circumstances!"
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "He's in the Sunroom right now," Merle says, "but I don't think he did the murder. At least, I haven't found any evidence to suggest it yet!"
  • "I sure do!" Merle says. "He's in the Sunroom. I don't think he did it, but it's dangerous to make assumptions before you have all the facts. That's like the first rule of detectiveing!"
  • "Oh sure, Detective! Billy Bob Banks's great fun!" Merle says. "He's in the Sunroom right now. He'll probably share his chewing gum with you, if you ask!"
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I don't know much about her yet, Detective," Niles says, "But you can tell just by looking at her that she has tons of underworld connections! She's in the Living Room right now, I could be the Bad Cop for you!"
    "No thank you," you say, to his disappointment.
  • "She's one of my top suspects!" Niles exclaims.
    "Why's that?" you ask.
    "Well jeez, Detective! Have you met her? She super-suspicious! Go to the Living Room and see for yourself!"
  • "Oh, she's in the Living Room -- you should check her out very carefully, Detective!" Niles says. "I bet the FBI has a rap sheet on her a mile long! Maybe Interpol too!"
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh sure, that's Alvin Sharp. He's real nice! ...Wait, you don't think he did the murder, do you?" he gasps.
  • "Oh, you mean Alvin Sharp?" Merle says. "I'd be real surprised if he did it, Detective! But I guess you have to cover all the bases in our line of work!"
  • "Uh-huh, that's Alvin Sharp. He's pretty funny," Merle says. "Wait, do you think he did it? Should I be investigating him?"
    "You should be sitting here quietly without investigate anything," you say sternly.
    "Aw, gee!"
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "That's Gabrielle Hyde, Detective," Niles says, nodding. "I'm pretty sure she's hiding something, but I guess that doesn't necessarily make her the killer. Lots of people around here have stuff they wanna keep secret."
  • "Sure, yeah," Niles nods. "That's Gabrielle Hyde. She's a real suspicious character, if you ask me! Keep your eyes peeled!"
  • "Gross. Yeah," Niles says. "That's Gabrielle Hyde. She creeps me out. There's something real fishy about her, Detective."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "That must be who's in the Study right now, Detective, "Merle says. "I was trying to figure out who that was, we've never really been introduced."
  • "They're in the Study, if I know who you mean, Detective," Merle says. "We've never really talked or anything."
  • "They seem nice enough, but I've never really talked to them, Detective," Merle says. "I think they're in the Study?"
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "All I know is they're in the Guest Bedroom," Merle says. "Sorry, Detective, I barely know them to say hi to."
  • "Hmm. I know who that is, but I dunno much of anything about them. Sorry, Detective," Merle says. "They're in the Guest Bedroom, maybe you can investigate them there?"
  • "I dunno much of anything about them, Detective," Merle says apologetically. "I'm pretty sure they're in the Guest Bedroom right now, though."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Gosh, Detective!" Merle exclaims. "I sure wish I knew! I've been looking all over for clues, but the bad guy really covered their tracks on this one!"
  • "Jeez, Detective!" Merle pouts. "If you hadn't ordered me to stay in here, maybe I'd be able to tell you! How about I just follow you around, I promise I won't get in the way!"
    "No," you say. "Stay here."
    "Well, phooey! You're no fun at all!"
  • "Sorry, Detective," Merle says sadly. "I haven't figured it out yet. This is bunches harder than when I solved the Mystery of Pirate Island!"
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Golly! You really want to know what I think, Detective?" Niles says, excitedly, and pulls out a notebook. "Okay, so, first I measured some footprints out in the driveway, and..."
    "Kid, we're short on time. Cut to the chase and tell me the details later, okay?"
    "Oh, okay! It was Ava Gregory!"
  • "Oh boy!" Niles says. "You really want to know who I think did it?"
    "Sure, kid," you say. "Lay it on me."
    "It was Ava Gregory for sure, Detective! That's the only suspect that fits all the clues!"
  • "It's just gotta be Ava Gregory, Detective," Niles says excitedly. "Means, motive, and opportunity -- just like the Junior Detective's Handbook says!"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Golly!" Todd exclaims, "A real-life detective wants to know what I think?"
    "Sure, kid," you say. "What've you got?"
    He flips open his notebook and quickly scans the pages. "I think it's the victim's child, Detective! It's gotta be!"
  • "Oh, it's definitely the child, Detective!" Todd says. "I can't prove it, but if you send these hair and fingerprint samples to the police lab..."
    "I'll just take your word for it, kid."
  • "Well, Detective," Todd says, excitedly pulling out his notebook, "if you correlate everyone's movements and alibis on this chart I made..."
    "The short version, please," you interrupt.
    "It's gotta be the victim's child! Nobody else fits!"

When arrested

Paul's eyes get really big and fill up with tears, and his lower lip quivers. "W-w-what? You can't mean that, Detective! Wait, no!" he protests, as the Officers Chaps enter the room and handcuff him.

"Sorry, kid -- the crocodile tears won't work on me," you growl as the officers drag him out the door. "Nice try, though."

"But what about my permanent record??" he wails.

"It just got a lot more interesting."


Suspect: Snooty (suspect_snooty.gif, suspect_snooty_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • As you enter the Pantry, you are greeted by an aristocratic-looking man dressed for a white-tie occasion. He looks you up and down, and doesn't appear to think much of what he sees.
  • You enter the Hall Closet and encounter a man dressed in very expensive-looking formal attire. He regards you with a look of distaste and disdain.
  • You walk into the Study and meet a man dressed for an extremely expensive white-tie affair. He looks down his nose regally at you.

Then one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "Sorry to keep you waiting," you say, "but I need to ask you a few questions."
    "Do you know who I am, Detective?" he says with an icy stare.
    "Yes, and I'm sure you have more important things to do. As soon as you answer my questions, you can get on with whatever they are."
    "...Very well."
  • "Excuse me," you say. "I'm with the police, and I need to ask you a few questions."
    "I am already late for the French Ambassador's gala," she says coldly. "I trust this will not take long?"
    "Depends on how quickly you answer."
    She glares at you for a second, then rolls her eyes. "Oh, very well. Ask."
  • "Sorry to disturb you," you say, "but I'm investigating Jessica Shaffer's death, and I need to ask you some questions."
    "I am an extremely busy man, Detective, and I have places to be this evening," he sniffs haughtily.
    "That's fine," you say. "The sooner I get these questions answered, the sooner you can go."
Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Hall Closet, where the victim's butler, <Full Name>, is waiting impatiently. His icy glare as you enter drops the ambient temperature of the room by several degrees.
  • You enter the Hall Closet, where <Full Name>, the victim's butler, is leafing impatiently through his appointment book.
  • You enter the Hall Closet and find the victim's butler, <Full Name>, glaring at the furnishings as though daring them to say something impertinent. You suppress a shudder as that gaze is turned on you.
Him/Herself (positive)
  • "We were quite cordial, yes Detective," he says. "We did not see eye-to-eye on every issue, particularly where politics were concerned, but there were no lasting arguments between us."
  • "<Vic Full Name> was a well-respected member of the community, Detective," <First Name> says. "<Vic First Name> was liked by everyone. Everyone worth considering, at any rate."
  • His glare defrosts, very slightly. "We were quite close, Detective. <Vic First Name> was a brilliant conversationalist, and had excellent taste in wine. It is a shame that she had so little taste in, for example, furnishings. Or the other people she associated with."
Him/Herself (negative)
  • "Jessica Shaffer was a pathetic little woman without class or taste," Prince sniffs. "Just look at the furniture in this place. Awful."
    "So that's a 'no' then?"
  • "To be perfectly honest with you, Detective," he says, "Jessica and I despised each other. We have not exchanged more than six words within as many months."
  • "We were not friends, if that's what you mean, Detective," he sniffs. "I had as little contact with that nouveau riche little upstart as was possible."
Name (positive, gives relation)
  • "Yes, Detective, that is Anna's chauffeur," Leonard says. "A perfectly charming woman, despite her upbringing."
  • "Ah yes, Anna's chauffeur," Leonard says. "Quite a polite and good-natured woman. She may even make something of herself one day."
  • "You're referring to Anna's chauffeur," Leonard says. "Yes, our interactions have been pleasant, though I have little reason to speak with her with any frequency."
Name (negative, gives relation)
  • "Ah, you're referring to that creature that Timmy refers to as his chauffeur," Brock says. "I make it a policy never to interact with people of such low caliber."
  • "Chloe Palmer?" he muses. "I don't think I know anyone by that name... oh, are you referring to Timmy's chauffeur? Ha ha, no, I do not associate with her."
  • Brock snorts derisively. "Timmy's chauffeur is utterly beneath my notice, Detective. I have nothing whatsoever to say about that woman."
Name (positive, gives location)
  • "I am familiar with Travis Key, Detective," Leonard says. "Our relationship is perfectly cordial, though I don't have much else to say about him. He is in the Billiard Room, if you require more information than that."
  • "I have nothing in particular to say about that man, Detective," Leonard says. "We have little occasion to interact. I believe he is in the Billiard Room at present."
  • "He and I do not interact in any significant way," he says, "but he seems fairly respectable. If you wish to know more, I can only recommend you go to the Billiard Room and ask him directly."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I do not associate with people of such low breeding and reprehensible moral character, Detective," Prince says haughtily. "You may speak to her yourself, if you wish -- she's in the Guest Bedroom."
  • "Hmph!" he snorts. "I don't know why you would take an interest in that rude little nobody, Detective. If you wish to lower yourself even further by actually speaking with her, she is in the Guest Bedroom."
  • "That... guttersnipe can be found in the Guest Bedroom," Prince sniffs. "Other than that, I have absolutely nothing to say about her."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Travis Key? Why yes," he replies. "He's delightful -- wonderful sense of humor. What a shame he'll never amount to anything."
  • "I know him, yes," he says. "Travis Key. As pleasant a luncheon companion as I've had, at least from the lower strata of society."
  • "Oh yes, I know him," Leonard says. "His name is Travis Key. Charming man. Utterly unsuited to the upper-class lifestyle, of course."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "I presume you are asking about Merle Mason," Prince says. "That loathsome little insect of a man. I have nothing to do with him, and nothing more to say."
  • "I utterly refuse to have anything to do with that despicable man," Prince scowls. "Jessica really suffered from the most appalling luck, to be stuck with a lawyer such as Merle Mason."
  • "Ugh! Do not even breathe the name Merle Mason in my presence, Detective!" Prince demands. "I didn't, but your request is noted," you reply.
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "No, I'm not familiar with that person," he says. "I believe I've seen them in the mansion from time to time, however. Go look in the Sunroom."
  • "I don't really know who that is," Leonard says. "I've seen them around, of course, but I certainly didn't take any notice. Perhaps they're in the Sunroom?"
  • "I know the person you mean," Leonard says, "but I've never really had occasion to speak with them. We travel in entirely different circles. Perhaps you should try the Sunroom?"
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Apart from the fact that they are in the Smoking Lounge," he says, "I know nothing about them, and nor do I care to."
  • "I know of that person, but have never found it necessary to interact with them," he sniffs. "I believe they're in the Smoking Lounge at the moment."
  • "I will not lower myself to that person's level by deigning to speak to them," Prince sniffs. "If you wish to know about them, try the Smoking Lounge."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Detective," Prince says with a glare, "if you cannot be bothered to do your own job, I most certainly am not going to do it for you."
  • "I'm sure I have no idea," he says coldly. "Perhaps you should figure it out, Detective, so that I needn't stand around this place answering your questions any longer!"
  • "You're asking me, Detective?" he exclaims. "If I knew that, this ridiculous little mishap would have been handled already!"
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "I believe the answer is quite obvious, Detective," Hunt sneers. "Who could it possibly have been except Sarah Casey? A prime specimen of the criminal underclass."
  • "Naturally I know who it was," Hunt smirks. "Who in this house is hungrier for elevation from their miserable station than Sarah Casey?"
  • "You wish to hear my opinion?" he says. "Well, that's very astute of you, Detective. In my view, it must have been Sarah Casey. I've never encountered a more obvious criminal."
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Well, since you asked me, Detective," McGee sniffs, "I would say it was undoubtedly that snivelling little upstart of a best friend."
  • "Without question, it was Craig's best friend," he replies.
    "How do you know that?" you ask.
    "Are you serious, Detective? Have you met them?"
  • "You expect me to do your work for you, Detective?" McGee sighs. "Very well, if it will get me out of this miserable situation more quickly. It was Craig's best friend -- no one else has as much to gain."
When arrested

"You... you... how dare you!" Dalton sputters as the Officers Chaps enter the room, right on cue. She stands upright as an iron flagpole, glaring at you as her wrists are cuffed. "You wretched little worm! You'll be writing parking tickets within the week, I'll see to it! This is an outrage!"

"It's a real shame all that money couldn't buy you a better personality," you mutter, as you and the officers escort her out the door.



Suspect: Jock (suspect_jock.gif, suspect_jock_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • The only person in the Master Bedroom is a hugely-muscled woman, currently working out with a set of oversized freeweights.
  • In the Billiard Room, you find a large and powerfully-muscled man doing arm-curls with a set of huge barbells.
  • You enter the Kitchen, and discover an extremely muscular man lifting weights and glistening with sweat.

Then, one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "I'm going to need to ask you a few questions," you say.
    "Yeah, okay," he replies. "S'alright if I keep lifting? It's arm day. Can't slack on arm day."
    "Err, no, go right ahead."
  • "I need to ask you a few questions about the murder," you say.
    "Real shame. Wouldn'ta happened if <Victim First Name>'d had a proper regimen like I told her."
  • "Is this your usual spot for training?" you ask, looking around. "Kind of an unusual choice."
    "Yeah, well," Trinity grunts, "With all this stuff going on, I couldn't leave to go to my usual gym, right? Good thing I carry a set of weights around for emergencies."
Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Master Bedroom, where <Full Name>, the victim's chauffeur, is still puffing and sweating and lifting weights.
  • Back at the Master Bedroom, <Full Name>, the victim's chauffeur, is still lifting weights. Which is not, to be honest, all that surprising.
  • You return to the Master Bedroom, which is starting to smell noticeably of sweat from the workout the victim's chauffeur, <Full Name>, is having.

Then one of:

  • "I've got to hand it to you," you say, "all this working out you do is giving you real results."
    "Heh, yeah, I'd like to see a murderer try and get one over on me," she says. "I'd crush his skull like a pumpkin! Wanna see me crush a pumpkin? I can do it with my armpit!"
    "...Not just now, thanks."
  • "How long do you intend to do that?" you ask.
    "'Nother couple-a hours. On the free-weights, I mean. You gonna be done by then? I don't have a spare heavy-bag here."
  • "Do you do those posing competitions and so on?" you ask.
    "Nope," Audrey says, shaking her head as far as her neck will allow, which isn't much. "Not healthy to compare yourself. Besides, these babies are just for me." She curls a massive bicep and kisses it.
Him/Herself (positive)
  • "Oh yeah, we had a great time," <First Name> says wistfully. "I'm gonna miss giving her those piggyback rides."
  • "We got along pretty well, yeah," she says. "Heh, she was always buying food in jars, 'cuz I'm so good at opening them."
  • "Yeah, <Victim First Name> was real good to me," <First Name> says. "Never listened to what I tried to tell her about his diet and regimen, though."
Him/Herself (negative)
  • "Nah, we didn't get along that well. We weren't, like, enemies -- just nothing in common. She called me a... umm, what was the word?"
    "Narcissist?"
    "Yeah, that was it!" he says. "How'd you know?"
    "Oh, just a wild guess."
  • "Nah, I ain't got time for a skinny little woman like that. Not when I got these!" Travis flexes his arms, making the muscles (and veins) bulge dramatically.
  • "Nah, we didn't talk much. She threatened to throw me out if I didn't stop buggin' her about her exercise regimen."
Name (positive, gives relation)
  • "She's Anna's cousin," Travis says. "We don't have much in common, but we get along pretty well. She's got a real good sense of humor, you know? Funny."
  • "Oh sure, that's Anna's cousin, I know her," Travis says. "We swap training tips all the time. Well, I tell her training tips and she listens politely."
  • "'Course I know Aubrey Booker!" Travis says. "That's Anna's cousin. I challenged her to arm-wrestle once, and nearly threw her across the room, heh heh. Oh, don't give me that look, she was fine."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "I've got no use for that scrawny runt of a business partner," Ava snorts. "Well -- maybe I could use her as bicep floss! Heh!"
    "You... floss your biceps?"
  • "Yeah, I know that wimp. That's Billy Bob's business partner," Ava says. "Pathetic. All talk and no fight."
  • "Huh!" Ava grunts. "That's Billy Bob's business partner -- a skinny little sneak. I trust her about as far as I can throw her... er... I guess that's pretty far actually." Her forehead creases as she considers this. "As far as I could not throw her?"
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Yeah, I like her," Ava says. "Never complains when I accidentally break one of the flimsy little chairs they've got around here. She'll be in the Attic, if you're looking for her."
  • "Sure! Ava Hammond's a good friend. We play games all the time," she replies.
    "Games?"
    "Yeah, she beats me at chess, and then I beat her at leg-wrestling. She's in the Attic if you want to meet her."
  • "Oh sure, she's great," Ava says. "A bit scrawny, but a real go-getter. Smart as a whip, too, always helps me out with the math when I'm counting calories. She's usually in the Attic, you can find her there."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I could break that punk in half with my pinky fingers," Travis snorts. "Heck, with my eyelids! He's in the Master Bedroom, go see for yourself what a weakling he is."
  • "Huh!" Travis snorts. "Yeah, I know him. If you wanna meet the world's biggest wimp, just go to the Master Bedroom."
  • "Pfft, yeah, I know Garrett Leonard," Travis says. "You'll find him in the Master Bedroom, if a stiff breeze hasn't carried him away, hah!"
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Anna's chauffeur? Oh, you mean Bella Sellers," Travis says. "Yeah, I wouldn't say we're close, but we get along. I almost asked her to spot me on the benchpress once, but she couldn'ta handled the weight. Probably couldn't handle the weight of a large phone book, but not everybody has muscles as glorious as mine."
  • "Yeah, her name's Bella Sellers. Seems a decent sort. Keeps to herself, doesn't bug me when I'm working out, you know."
  • "Sure, that's Bella Sellers," Travis says. "She's all right, for a woman with the muscles of a... I dunno, one of those bugs that look like sticks, or something."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Her?" Travis says. "Don't see what you'd be interested in her for. She's all words and hot air. No muscle, no backbone."
  • "Oh, her," Travis says. "Maria Whitney, I think her name is. Dunno what that scrawny little weasel could possibly be good for. I guess if you had some sand, you could kick it in her face."
  • Travis rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I know who that is. Her name's Maria Whitney. Totally useless. Maybe if she had some muscle mass, she'd at least be useful as a barbell, hah!"
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Hmm, I know who that is, but don't know much about 'em," Travis says. "I think they'd be in the Foyer at this time of day."
  • "Yeah, I know who you mean," Travis says. "Not real well, but we make smalltalk from time to time. Which is the only kind of talk they could make, hah! They're in the Foyer if you wanna see 'em."
  • "Yeah, nothin' against them, but we don't talk much," he replies. "They aren't interested in bodybuilding, and I'm not interested in... whatever. Try the Foyer."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Forget that wimp," Travis sneers. "I already did."
    "Can you tell me anything at all?" you ask.
    "Pfft. They'll be in the Sunroom. That's all I know or care."
  • "Umm..." Travis thinks. "Yeah, I know who you mean, but we don't talk. Look in the Sunroom if you have questions for them, I guess."
  • "Oh, that's the jerk that keeps calling me a 'muscle-head' when they think I'm not listening," Travis says. "Little do they know, my ears are as strong as the rest of me! Heck, I can hear them in the Sunroom right now."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Nah, sorry," he says. "No idea. I was blastin' my delts at the time, so I didn't notice anything unusual."
  • "Beats me," he mutters. "If they try and pull that murder stuff on me, though, I'll tie 'em in a knot like a fireplace poker!"
    "...You can do that?" you ask.
    "Yeah! Wanna see?"
    "Yeah, kind of. But later."
  • Travis shakes his head. "No idea who it was. If they tried that on me, though, I'd tear them in half. Literally. I've been practicing on sides of beef."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Oh ho!" Pete exclaims. "If you're asking me, then you must recognize my power!"
    "I... what?"
    "It was Layla Nichols. As plain as these sick pecs!"
  • "Oh yeah," Pete says. I know who it was. It was Layla Nichols. And if I wasn't so busy with Arm Day, I'd wring that scrawny neck myself."
  • "Sure, I know who it was," Pete says. "Nothing gets past these muscles!"
    "I... don't know what that means, but who?" you ask.
    "Layla Nichols. Can you believe it? A skinny twig like that?"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Who killed Travis?" Angelina says. "That's easy, it was his housekeeper."
    "How do you know?" you ask.
    Angelina flexes her muscles at you in several bodybuilder poses. You aren't sure how that relates to the question.
  • "Oh, that's as easy as tearing a telephone in half," Angelina says. "It was Travis's housekeeper."
    'You don't mean 'telephone book', do you?"
    "Nope."
  • "Yeah, easy," Angelina says. "It was Travis's housekeeper."
    "Are you sure?" you ask.
    "Hey buddy, these muscles don't lie." She flexes at you to demonstrate... something.
When arrested

"What?!" Gabrielle roars, as the Officers Chaps and half a dozen other policemen rush into the room and grab her, tying her up with a hefty coil of rope and three pairs of handcuffs. "You're accusing me?? I'll break you all in half! I'll drink protein shakes out of your skulls!" The policemen call for backup, and several more hurry into the room to help drag the struggling ogre away.


Suspect: Punk (suspect_punk.gif, suspect_punk_f.gif)

One of:

  • You enter the <location> and find an annoyed-looking young man slouched on a leather sofa with his motorcycle boots propped up on the expensive ebony coffee-table. He gives you a withering look and lights a cigarette.
  • You enter the <location>, where a bored and angry-looking young woman in motorcycle boots and a leather jacket is stomping around and ashing her cigarette on the expensive-looking Turkish carpet. <dossier message>
  • You enter the Sunroom, where a young woman wearing a leather jacket and motorcycle boots is casually whittling her initials into the surface of a mahogany end-table. She glances at you, finishes her task, and puts her penknife away.

Then, one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "God, finally," he growls. "Hurry up and ask me some effin' questions so I can get out of this place!"
    "You in a hurry or something?" you ask, tapping your pencil on your notepad.
    "Look, cop, I got a life. I got stuff to be doing other than standing around this craphole."
  • "I've got some questions for you," you say.
    "Good! Great! Ask away!" she mutters. "Then maybe I can get out of this dive."
    "You got somewhere better to be?"
    "If that's the kinda questions you're gonna ask, this is gonna be ‘’real’’ fun," she says, rolling her eyes.
  • "I need to ask you some questions about the murder," you say.
    "I didn't kill anybody, but if I have to hang around this dump any longer, I might," he snarls. "Hurry up and ask me whatever you're gonna ask, so I can get out of here!"
Returning

One of:

  • <Full Name> (the victim's child) scowls at you impatiently as you enter the Wine Cellar.
  • You enter the Wine Cellar, where <Full Name>, the victim's child, is pacing around impatiently.
  • You return to the Wine Cellar, and <Full Name>, the victim's child, greets you with an impatient (and rude) gesture.

Then one of:

  • "Hey, cop!" she says. "Are we finished with this crap yet, or what?"
    "Cool your jets, kid," you growl. "We'll be done soon enough."
  • "Oh goody, more questions," she mutters, rolling her eyes.
  • "You again," she grumbles. "Are we done here yet?"
    "We're done when I say so," you reply, glaring. She glares back defiantly.
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "There's nothing to tell!" <First Name> mutters. "I was her child, and she's dead, and if I find out who did it you'll have another case on your hands."
  • "What's to tell?" <First Name> mutters. "I was her child, and she was nice to me. End of story! So when are you gonna tell me who did this, so I can stomp their faces in?"
  • <First Name> shrugs. "I was her child. She was a good person. Not like some of the jackasses that hang around here."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "I was his chauffeur, and there's nothin' else to tell ya," Jessica says. "Except that he was a jerk and a phony, and I'm not gonna miss him."
  • "You want me to tell you about Billy Bob Thompson?" Jessica says, tapping her cigarette into a porcelain urn that you think might be Han Dynasty. "What's to tell? He's dead, and that's just effin' fine with me."
  • "I got nothin' to say about that piece of crap, except that he was a piece of crap," Jessica growls. "He shoulda died years ago and saved all of us some trouble."
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Ava Gregory? Billy Bob's lawyer? She's cool, she's a good person. Don't you be hasslin' her!" she snarls, jabbing a forefinger at you.
  • "Ava Gregory? You mean Billy Bob's lawyer, right? She's cool, I got no beef with her."
  • "Yeah, I know Ava Gregory. She's Billy Bob's lawyer. Or was, I guess. She's okay. I never had any trouble with her."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Makayla Delacruz? That jerk? All I know is she's Billy Bob's child, and that's all I wanna know about that jerk."
  • "You mean Billy Bob's child? She's a scumbag, that's all I know. I wouldn't trust that sack of crap with my life."
  • "Makayla Delacruz, that's Billy Bob's child. I ain't got a single good word to say about that sleazy friggin' weasel."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • Jessica scowls. "What, now you're after Madison Everett? You think I'm gonna help you pin this on one of my friends, think again, cop! She's in the Guest Bedroom, you can go talk to her yourself!"
  • "Hey, cop -- Madison Everett is my friend, and I don't talk to cops about my friends. Haul your cop ass to the Guest Bedroom and ask she yourself."
  • "Madison Everett? She's alright, she's cool. I think she's over in the Guest Bedroom? But that's all I'm gonna say to a cop."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I can tell you that piece of crap is stinking up the Ballroom. You want any more than that, go ask her for yourself."
  • "Feh!" she growls, and stomps her cigarette out on the floor. "If you wanna know about Ava Hammond, go to the Ballroom and ask her yourself. I don't want anything to do with her."
  • "Ava Hammond? I can't stand the sight of that slimy worm. I think she's in the Ballroom? Go see for yourself what a piece of crap she is."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh, you mean Madison Everett. she's all right. Can't tell you much about her, though."
    "Do you mean can't, or won't?" you ask.
    "What I mean is: get bent, cop!"
  • "Yeah, I know her, that's Madison Everett. She's pretty cool."
    "...And?" you ask.
    "And that's all I'm gonna say to a cop, cop!"
  • "Billy Bob's business partner? She's called Madison Everett. She seems okay. That's all I know, though, so choke on it."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Yeah, you mean Ava Gregory, right? I don't know anything about her except that she's a real ass and I don't want anything to do with her. Does that help?"
  • "Billy Bob's housekeeper? Oh -- you mean that jerkbag Ava Gregory. I haven't got a damn thing to say about that piece of crap."
  • "Housekeeper? Housekeeper..." Jessica lights a cigarette and thinks for a moment. "...Oh! You mean Ava Gregory. Yeah, I don't give a crap about that woman."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Hmm, yeah. I think I saw them in the Lounge?"
    "Okay," you say, making a note of it. "Can you tell me anything about them?"
    "Nah. S'alright, I guess? We don't really interact."
  • "Don't know much about 'em. Alright, I suppose. Go find out for yourself -- in the Lounge, I think."
  • "Oh, umm... I think I know who you mean. In the Lounge. Don't know 'em too well, but I guess they're okay."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Oh, that jerkoff. Go to the Servants' Quarters and see for yourself why I wouldn't give a wet fart."
  • "Billy Bob's lawyer? I ain't gonna even say that piece of crap's name. Go to the Servants' Quarters and find out for yourself."
  • "Umm... Yeah, I think I know who you mean, but I can't think of their name. Never cared to know. They're probably in the Servants' Quarters."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "What, now you want me to do your damn job for you?" she sneers. "You're the big-time detective, you figure it out!"
  • "Get the hell outta here! Even if I did know, I still wouldn't tell a cop!"
  • "Look, cop -- I don't know who did it, and if I did, I still wouldn't tell you! Get out of my face, already!"
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Cuttin' right to the chase, huh?" Autumn says. "Well, since you ask so friggin' nice and all -- it was Fritz Olson. Whaddya think of that?"
    You write the name down without replying.
  • "Yeah, fine, okay. You wanna know who did it? It was Fritz Olson. You happy now?"
    "We'll see," you say, writing it down in your notebook.
  • "Yeah, well... normally I wouldn't talk to a cop," she says, "but I am sick to death of sitting around here. So I'll tell you: it was Fritz Olson. Can I friggin' go now?"
    "I'll let you know," you say.
    "Frig!" Autumn says, throwing her hands in the air exasperatedly. "I'm gonna be stuck here all frickin' night!"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Oh, well, it was probably the butler. That's what I figure."
    "Why do you say that?" you ask.
    "Because I'm a friggin' psychic. Get bent!"
  • "Well, I'll tell you this," Lucy says, "if I was you -- and I'm friggin' glad I'm not, hah -- but if I was you I'd look into Jessica's butler."
    "How about a name?" you ask.
    "How about up yours, cop?"
  • "You want me to tell you who the killer is?" Lucy asks. "Okay. It was Jessica's butler."
    "Do you have any evidence for that?"
    "Yeah, sure. Right here in my pocket." She reaches into her jacket pocket, and pulls out her middle finger.

When arrested

"You what?" Autumn shouts. As if on cue, the Officers Chaps enter the room and grab her by the arms and cuff her. "Hey!" she shouts. "Get yer friggin' hands off me, you friggin' cops! I didn't kill nobody!"

"You can tell us all about how you didn't do it down at the station," you growl. "Take her away, boys."

"Eff you, you cop bastards!"


Suspect: Poet (suspect_poet.gif, suspect_poet_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • You enter the <location> and find a young woman in a beret, pacing around and muttering to herself while scribbling in a leather-bound notebook.
  • Inside the Breakfast Nook you find a young man deep in thought, staring at the ceiling while tapping his pencil on the page of a leather-bound notebook.
  • When you enter the Study, you encounter a young man wearing a beret and black turtleneck, chewing on the end of his pencil.

Then, one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "Excuse me," you say. "I'm from the police, and I need to ask you a few questions."
    "Hmm," she says. "Questions, questions. ...No, no, that won't do at all."
    "I beg your pardon?"
    "There's no good rhyme for 'questions', it simply won't fit."
  • "Excuse me," you say. "I need to ask you a few--"
    "One moment, please. I am in the middle of my magnum opus! I just require a suitable rhyme for 'lethal'."
    "This can't wait, I'm afraid," you growl, showing your badge.
    Billy Bob sighs theatrically. "Very well. Ask away, then."
  • "Excuse me," you say. "I'm with the police, and I need to ask--"
    "Ah! Good! A detective!" he says. "Please, I require your aid. I simply cannot, for the life of me, think of a decent rhyme for 'murder'."
    "'Heard her,'" you reply. "or 'hurt her'."
    "Ah! That'll do nicely. And now, quid pro quo: what can I do for you?"
Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Dining Room, where <Full Name>, the victim's college roommate is struggling to compose her poetic masterpiece.
  • You return to the Dining Room, and find the victim's college roommate, <Full Name>, still working feverishly on her poem about the murder.
  • You enter the Dining Room -- the victim's college roommate, <Full Name>, is still working on her poem about the murder.

Then one of:

  • Guess these artistic types get their inspiration from all sorts of places.
  • Perhaps she's trying to race you to the conclusion.
  • Presumably she's got some extra pencils stashed somewhere, because she's chewing the hell out of her current one.

Then one of:

  • "Ah, you're back," she says. "Which do you think sounds better: 'skull dashed 'pon stony hearth', or 'blade-cut grin leaks vital scarlet'?"
    "Er..." you say, "this poem is about <Vic Full Name>, isn't it? She was killed with an egg."
    "Oh, don't be so pedestrian. It's poetic license!"
  • "Ah, good, you're just in time," she says. "What do you think of this: 'life drains, falling, lost, blackened grains drain / 'twixt outstretched fingers grasping, gasping.'"
    "I think you ought to have your poetic license revoked," you say.
    "Hmph! Well, I wouldn't expect a police detective to understand the emotional turmoil of violent death."
  • "Oh! Hello," she says. "I was hoping you would come back, so I could ask you: <Victim First Name>'s last words -- how many were there?"
    "How many? Well, I don't know that anyone but the murderer heard them, but according to the coroner's report it was a short sentence at the most. And probably just 'Ow'."
    "Not an entire sonnet? Well, that's a slight crimp in my plans."
Him/Herself (positive)
  • "Oh, we got along famously," <First Name> says. "She was always asking my opinion on word choice for her boardroom speeches. Although I never could convince her to do them in a properly lyrical meter."
  • "Oh yes," <First Name> says. "We got along marvelously. She always listened very attentively to my poetry. Although I did have to make an appointment in advance for anything longer than half a page."
  • "<Victim First Name> was my biggest fan," <First Name> sighs. "She used to pay me quite well for the original drafts of my works. Especially in the winter, which is a trifle odd now that I come to consider it."
    "Apropos of nothing," you say, "does this mansion have central heating?"
    "Oh no, it's far too old. We use fireplaces. Why do you ask?"
    "No reason."
Him/Herself (negative)
  • "Hmph, no, not very well," Billy Bob sniffs. "She was terribly uncultured when it came to poetry. Why, she couldn't tell a limerick from a sestina."
    "That's a kind of nap, right?"
  • "Oh, she could be so aggravating sometimes!" Billy Bob complains. "You know, she absolutely refused to hear any of my poems? She threatened to throw me out of the house herself when I tried to read her my epic about the dream I had about angels who were made of bread -- you know, I've got it right here, why don't I just--"
    "Consider that threat still in force," you growl.
  • "Ugh, no. Positively beastly woman," Billy Bob says. "She didn't care about any form of fine art that couldn't be bought from a gallery and hung on the wall as an investment."
Name (positive, gives relation)
  • "Certainly!" <First Name> says. "We get along quite well. She's <Victim First Name>'s butler, you know. Very polite and appreciative of my work, though I fear most of it goes over her head."
  • "<Victim First Name>'s butler and I have a very cordial relationship," she says. "She has essentially no understanding of the poetic form, poor soul, but she does the best she can."
  • "You're referring to <Victim First Name>'s butler. She's a perfectly affable woman, Detective," <First Name> says. "We get along reasonably well, though she hasn't the artistic education of a raccoon."
Name (negative, gives relation)
  • "She's <Victim First Name>'s sibling, and an absolute philistine," <First Name> scowls.
    "Doesn't like your poetry, eh?"
    "She tore up my favorite sonnet about mushrooms!"
    "Well, everybody's a critic."
  • "Who?" <First Name> asks. "Oh -- you mean <Victim First Name>'s sibling. No, I have no time for a person with such reprehensible ignorance of the fine arts. She thinks Baudelaire is a type of French wine."
  • "Ah, yes," <First Name> says, rolling her eyes dramatically. "The sibling. No, that feeble-minded blowhard and I have little in common, Detective. Well, she walks upright, I suppose. Barely."
Name (negative, gives location)
  • "No, Detective, I have no respect for such an unthinking degenerate," <First Name> says. "If it were up to her, there would be no art in this world but what might be found upon a television screen. You'll find her in the Pantry, if you wish to behold such a monster for yourself."
  • "Sorry, Detective," <First Name> says, shaking her head. "I refuse to speak to -- or of -- that savage. You'll find her in the Pantry, if you wish to see what the modern educational system does to a person."
  • "She can be found in the Pantry, Detective, and that is all I have to say about a person who thinks any poem longer than a limerick is 'boring as hell', endquote."
Name (positive, gives location)
  • "Oh, <Full Name> is my biggest fan!" <First Name> says. "He is always asking me to read him my poems. I mean, I'm sure he would, if he wasn't always in such a rush, poor dear. You might find him in the Hall Closet."
  • "Oh yes, yes indeed," <First Name> smiles. "We're quite companionable. He's quite an attentive and astute listener. He's in the Hall Closet -- I'm positive that if you ask him, he'll tell you all about how he loves my work."
  • "We get along famously!" <First Name> says. "In fact, he once told me his favorite poem was one of mine."
    "Is it your shortest one?"
    "Why yes, how did you know? It's called--"
    "I'll have him tell me about it himself."
    "Very well! He's in the Hall Closet."
Relation (negative, gives name, lie?)
  • "Hmpf," <First Name> snorts. "You're referring to <Full Name>. I'm afraid I don't associate with people whose idea of a dictionary has little pictures of superheroes providing examples for each definition."
  • "I know of the person you describe," <First Name> sniffs. "Her name is <Full Name>, and she is a boorish lout with the literary education of a ham sandwich."
  • "Do you mean <Full Name>? Bah," <First Name> says with a grimace. "I might as well attempt to converse with the raccoon that knocks over the trash bins in the evening."
Relation (positive, gives name, lie?)
  • "Are you referring to <Full Name>?" <First Name> asks. "Yes, I'd say we get along quite well. She doesn't know very much about poetry, I'm afraid, but I'm doing my best to educate her whenever she's not late for one of her many dentist appointments."
  • "Oh yes, <Full Name> and I get along quite well. Just the other day she helped me think of a rhyme for 'ennui'," <First Name> says. "...Would you like to know what it was?"
    "No, thank you."
    "It's very clever."
    "I'm sure it is."
  • "Yes, <Full Name> and I get along rather well," <First Name> says. "She never seems to have time to hear my poems, but she always seems so saddened by the fact, I can't help but forgive her."
Relation (negative, gives location, lie?)
  • "That barbarian is currently occupying the Master Bedroom," <First Name> says, "which is why I'm not there myself. One might as well read one's poetry to a pickled eel."
  • "I'll have nothing to do with that savage in the Master Bedroom," <First Name> says. "Not until they apologize for comparing my 'Opus XXVII' to Smash Mouth lyrics."
  • "I have nothing good to say about that... person," <First Name> snorts. "Their presence in the Master Bedroom is lowering the average intelligence of the household by at least thirty points."


Relation (positive, gives location, lie?)
  • "I see so little of them," she says, "that I would almost suspect they were avoiding me deliberately! But I believe you'll find them in the Lounge at the moment."
  • "Ah yes, the child," <First Name> muses. "Not a poetic bone in that entire body, of course. Such a pity. You might try the Lounge, if you've a need to speak with them."
  • "Ah yes, I know of whom you speak," <First Name> says. "We don't interact much, as we've very little in common. But you can find them in the Lounge."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "I think it was probably either a raven, or a metaphor for the tyranny of social expectations," <First Name> says.
    "Well thanks," you say dryly. "I'll be sure to put an APB out on both of those things."
  • "Who killed <Vic First Name>?" <First Name> asks. "Why, I haven't the faintest idea. I was rather hoping you could tell me, or else I won't be able to give my poem a proper ending."
  • "Well, in my poem I'm attributing the murder to a black shadow wrought from the ghosts of those murdered by capitalism," <First Name> says. "Does that help?"
    "Not... particularly."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Hmm, well," Billy Bob muses, "I suppose it does make for a more satisfying conclusion to my poem if you actually apprehend the criminal. Very well, it was Peyton Alvarez."
  • "Oh, well," Billy Bob says, "I mean, I haven't quite finished my poem yet, and I wouldn't like to spoil the dramatic reveal for you, but I could read you what I have so far and..."
    "Just the name, please."
    "It was Peyton Alvarez," he says dourly.
  • "Well, I hate to give away the ending," Billy Bob says, "but I'm having trouble with that part anyway. What's a good rhyme for 'Peyton Alvarez'?"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "It was the grim spectre of guilt, which gripped Evelyn Newman's heart in the icy talons of--"
    "No metaphors, please."
    "It was her cousin," he grumbles.
  • "Well, obviously, it was karmic debt for decades of selfish corporatism," Ricky says.
    "Do you have anything more concrete?" you ask.
    "Oh, well, if you want to be bourgeois about it," he sniffs. "It was her cousin."
  • "Unfortunately," Ricky grumbles, "it was Evelyn's cousin. I can't think of a single decent rhyme for cousin."

When arrested

"What?!" Sydney exclaims as the Officers Chaps enter the room, right on cue. "Impossible! That you would accuse me of such an affront! Wait -- leave one of my hands free so I can write this down, please," she asks as the officers cuff her wrists and start dragging her out the door. "This will be a masterwork of lyrical protest!"


Suspect: Bookish (suspect_bookish.gif, suspect_bookish_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • In the Guest Bedroom, you find a dark-haired young woman sitting quietly, reading a book. She glances briefly at you over the top of her glasses as you enter, but says nothing.
  • A dark-haired young man is sitting in the Lounge, quietly reading a large hardcover book. He doesn't seem to be aware of your presence.
  • You enter the Bar, where a dark-haired young woman in glasses is sitting, deeply focused on a large hardback book; she doesn't look up as you come in.

Then one of <dossier messages>.

Then one of:

  • "Excuse me," you say, "I'm from the police, and I need to ask you some questions. ...Can you put the book down for a minute?" She slowly drags her eyes away from the page and regard you impassively. "Well, it's a start," you sigh.
  • "I'm from the police, and I'll need to ask you a few questions," you say.
    "Mm-hmm," comes the reply.
    "...You're the quiet type, I gather."
    "Mm-hmm."
    "Are all your answers going to be like this?"
    She turns the page without comment.
  • "What are you reading?" you ask, to break the silence. He silently gestures at the cover, which is jacketless and doesn't have the title printed on it. "So... a book."
    "Mm-hmm," he replies.
Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Lounge -- the victim's neighbor, <Full Name>, is still sitting quietly and reading.
  • You return to the Lounge, where <Full Name> (the victim's neighbor) is still reading his book.
  • The Lounge is still silent but for the sound of turning pages as the victim's neighbor, <Full Name>, sits and reads.

Then one of:

  • "Hey," you say. "I've got some more questions for you."
    "Mm-hmm?" comes the reply.
    "Eyes up here, please," you sigh.
  • "Rest your eyes for a second," you say. "I've got something to ask you." He looks up at you with a very faint sigh.
  • He ignores you, though at least you get the sense that it's not out of dislike so much as absolute disinterest.
Him/Herself (positive)
  • After a long pause, he murmurs, "She liked books."
    "Well, it's nice that you had something in common."
    Nod.
  • "Excellent library," he murmurs, nodding slightly.
  • <Name> nods quietly. "We talked."
    "You actually held a conversation with someone?" you say with feigned surprise.
    "About books."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • After a long moment, she mutters, "Rude. Noisy."
  • Ava scowls slightly, and turns her head from side to side.
  • She turns the page in her book without looking at you, and makes a little displeased noise halfway between "feh" and "bah".
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • Ava nods slightly. "Billy Bob's neighbour".
    "Is there anything else you can tell me?"
    Silence.
  • "Billy Bob's neighbor," comes the murmured reply.
    "Okay. Anything else?"
    "He doesn't disturb me while I'm reading."
  • Ava shrugs. "Billy Bob's neighbor. We get along."
    "Is that all?"
    "That's all."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • Ava snorts quietly. "An ass."
    "Okay. Can you tell me anything more... concrete?"
    "Billy Bob's personal assistant. Garbage."
  • Ava frowns. "Wish I didn't know her. Billy Bob's personal assistant."
  • She scowls. "The personal assistant."
    "Anything else you can tell me?"
    "Hmph."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • Saul shakes his head. "Don't know him well. He's in the Study, I think."
  • Saul shrugs.
    "Nothing at all?"
    "He's in the Study."
  • "Seen him around. That's all."
    "Where?"
    "In the Study."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • Ava sniffs disdainfully. "Living Room."
    "...Anything else?"
    "She's a jerk."
  • "She's a jackass," Ava replies, "and she's in the Living Room."
    "Good lord. Don't wear yourself out, saying that many words all at once."
    "Mm-hmm."
  • "I have nothing good to say about her."
    "At this point," you growl, "I would be delighted to get any kind of information at all out of you."
    "She's in the Living Room."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • Ava nods. "Jessica Holmes."
    "Can you tell me anything about her?"
    Shrug. "Seemed reasonable enough."
  • "Her name's Jessica Holmes."
    "...Anything else? Anything at all?"
    Shrug.
  • "Know her a little. Her name's Jessica Holmes. She doesn't get on my nerves like some people."
    "Like who?"
    She looks up at you, then looks back at her book.
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Don't really know her. Name's Paige Church."
    "Can you tell me anything at all about her?"
    "She's awful."
    "...Anything else?"
    "No."
  • Ava grimaces and turns a page. "Ugh."
    "Can you tell me anything about them at all?"
    "Name's Paige Church."
    "...That's it, huh?"
    "Mm-hmm."
  • "Paige Church. We don't talk."
    "Do you actually talk to anyone?"
    She turns a page and doesn't reply.
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Only know them a little. They're in the Guest Bedroom."
    "What do you think of them?"
    "'S'alright."
  • Ava shrugs. "Try the Guest Bedroom."
  • "They're in the Guest Bedroom."
    "Any opinion on them?"
    Shrug. "Seems okay."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "No."
    "Nothing at all?"
    "Try the Lounge."
  • "Met them once."
    "And?"
    "And they're in the Lounge if you want to try it yourself."
  • "They're in the Lounge."
    "And that's all you're going to say?"
    "Mm-hmm."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "No idea," she says, turning a page in her book.
  • She ignores you and keeps reading.
  • She shakes her head slightly, but doesn't say anything.
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • She looks up at you, and thinks for a second. "Hmm..."
    "Yes?"
    "...probably Jake Walsh."
    "And why do you say that?"
    Shrug.
  • Melanie tilts her head to the side in thought for a moment. "...Jake Walsh."
    "Okay," you say. "And why do you say that?"
    Melanie turns a page and goes back to her reading.
  • "Hmm." After a long pause, she mutters, "Probably Jake Walsh."
    "Do you have any evidence to back that up?"
    She glances up at you, then turns a page and keeps reading.
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "Investigate the gardener," Ike mutters quietly.
    "All right," you say. "Can you tell me anything more concrete?"
    "No."
  • Ike turns a page in his book. "I think it was the gardener."
    "Okay," you say, writing it down. "Why do you say that? ...Hello?"
  • "It was the gardener," Ike mutters from behind his book.
    "Do you have some kind of evidence for that?" you ask.
    No response.

When arrested

Melanie Rios looks up at you, frowning, but says nothing. The Officers Chaps come in the room right on cue, and grab her by the shoulders, hauling her to her feet.

"No! No!" she shouts, as she drops her book. "My place! You made me lose my place!"

"You're gonna lose more than that," you growl. "Take her away, boys."


Suspect: Professor (suspect_professor.gif, suspect_professor_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • Inside the Living Room you find a gray-haired man reading through a stack of papers, scowling at them with faint disgust.
  • The only person in the <location> is an older woman in a tweed suit, slashing at a stack of papers with a red pen.
  • You enter the Attic and find an older man in a tweed suit, muttering to himself over a stack of papers.

Then one of <dossier messages>.

Then one of:

  • "I'm a police detective," you say, showing your badge, "and I'll need to ask you some questions."
    "Very well. The foolishness of my students is threatening to overwhelm me," she says in a clipped Bavarian accent, "and so perhaps it would be advantageous to take a break. What can I do for you?"
  • "Excuse me," you say. "I'm with the police -- need to ask you a few questions. ...What are you doing?"
    "Grading papers. Although Ayers may have escaped her duties for the oblivion of death," he says in a clipped Bavarian accent, "the rest of us still have jobs that require our attention."
  • "Excuse me," you say, showing your badge. "Sorry to interrupt your work, but I need to ask you a few questions.
    "Good. I am weary of the answers my students have given me," she says in a clipped Bavarian accent, "and so now it will be my turn to give the answers. I shall recognize this as a rare moment of justice in the universe."
Returning

One of:

  • You return to the Bar, where the victim's sibling, <Full Name>, is still grimly forcing @askedPoss@ way through a stack of essays.
  • Back in the Bar, you find <Full Name>, the victim's sibling, still grading essays. It looks like she's going to need another red pen soon.
  • When you return to the Bar, the victim's sibling, <Full Name>, is still grading papers with an unusual expression of mixed irritation, disgust, and amusement.
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "We avoided topics of conversation in which we knew we could not reach an agreement, and we were not in conflict over scarce resources," Harrison says. "So it is fair to say that we got on reasonably well."
  • "I regarded <Vic Full Name> as one might regard a caged tiger," Harrison says. "Beautiful. Deadly. But ultimately helpless to control her environment. She had my sympathies."
  • "Yes, Detective. I admired her tenacity, the way she refused to relinquish control of her environment to outside influences," Harrison says. "Ultimately futile, of course, but admirable all the same."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "Jessica Shaffer was a woman who lived in fear, Detective. Fear of the world, and fear of the inevitable," Lester says. "I can have no respect for such a person."
  • "I have little regard for Jessica Shaffer, Detective," Lester says. "Her struggle against the inevitability of entropy and death was a profoundly futile waste."
  • "Like all humans, Jessica Shaffer struggled against her mortality as though it was a cage that bound her," Lester says.
    "... Is that a 'no'?"
    "It is."
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Ah yes. Jasmine Ayers's sibling," Kinney says. "An excellent mind. Very imaginative. Imagination is very important, Detective, for it is one of the few advantages than a human has over an animal."
  • "This is Jasmine Ayers's sibling," Kinney says. "She is very brave, and fearlessness is the primary requirement for a human being to control her own destiny."
  • "You are referring to Jasmine Ayers's sibling," Kinney says. "We have had many interesting conversations; she is an excellent thinker. Our topics of interest are largely dissimilar, but one must expose oneself to new things, or else stagnate and die."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "This is the name of Jessica Shaffer's ex-golf caddy," Lester says. "If such a title continues to have any significance after this day's events. The man himself is of no consequence to me."
  • "You are referring to Jessica Shaffer's ex-golf caddy, I believe," Lester says. "A man of small mind, with no dreams or imagination. He might as well be an iguana."
  • "You are speaking of Jessica Shaffer's ex-golf caddy," Lester says, "and I wish that you would not."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Ah yes," Kinney says. "You will find him in the Master Bedroom, Detective. We have participated in friendly debate on occasion. His views regarding the human condition are unorthodox, but intriguing."
  • "He is in the Master Bedroom," Kinney says. "We are cordial with one another, but speak little. It is refreshing to know someone who does not insist on small talk at every encounter."
  • "I know of whom you speak," Kinney says. "Presently, he is in the Master Bedroom. His outlook on life is, in many ways, quite refreshing."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "He is in the Guest Bedroom at the moment," Lester says. "Perhaps you will discover a use for him where I have not."
  • "Mmm. You will find him in the Guest Bedroom," Lester says. "I must warn you, Detective, that he has little regard for the truth."
  • "You will find this man in the Guest Bedroom," Lester says. "Refusing to accept responsibility for his own actions, I do not doubt."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "This person's name is Billy Bob Banks, Detective," Lester says. "I have found him to be quite companionable, and thoughtful in his opinions."
  • "Yes, I consider Billy Bob Banks to be a friend, Detective. In as much as any two humans, with our limited understanding of the universe filtered by our barely-evolved brains, can be said to truly be friends."
  • "Yes, that is Billy Bob Banks, Lester says. "A fine man, quite fearless and comfortable with the unknown. I regard these as remarkable qualities."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "You are referring to Sydney Benson, I presume," Cleveland says. "She is a petulant child, demanding candy from a universe that does not listen."
  • "I believe you are speaking of Sydney Benson, Detective," Cleveland says. "I have nothing to recommend of such a cowardly, beady-eyed vole of a human being."
  • "This woman you are speaking of, her name is Sydney Benson," Cleveland says. "My interactions with her have been unpleasant, without exception."
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "A well-mannered individual," Kinney says. "Regrettably, I can tell you no more, as we have had no opportunity for conversation. They are in the Foyer, I believe."
  • "I regret that I have had little interaction with this person," Kinney says. "I simply have not had the time. Perhaps, Detective, when you find them in the Foyer, you might send my regards."
  • "If you seek them out in the Foyer, I believe you will find them to be quite reasonable, Detective," Kinney says. "That is the impression I have, though we have not conversed at any length."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "Each of us has a limited amount of time on this Earth, Detective," Lester says, "and I have resolved not to spend mine upon such a person. But, you must judge for yourself. You will find them in the Breakfast Nook."
  • "I have had very little interaction with this person, Detective," Lester says. "This is by choice, as I am certain that they have nothing to offer me. Perhaps it will be a different matter for you, in which case you can find them in the Breakfast Nook."
  • "I have spoken with them on rare occasion, Detective," Lester says. "It was not worth my time. But the Breakfast Nook is where you can find them."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "I do not feel that the question of who murdered Jasmine Ayers has true relevance, Detective," Kinney says. "All people die. It is only a matter of when."
    "And how," you mutter.
  • "I respect that the matter is of interest to you, Detective," Kinney says, "because it is only through the interest of people such as yourself that our society can withstand the forces of chaos for the brief time that we inhabit this universe. However, I do not share your interest."
  • "This is not my field of knowledge or experience, Detective," Kinney says. "Nor of interest. I will leave such matters to you and the other police."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Do you not already know, Detective?" Lester asks. "You need only ask yourself, who among these people is so ruled by fear that they would take the life of another in order to prolong their own existence, miserable though it may be?"
    "...Just answer the question, please?"
    "Peyton Alvarez."
  • "It is not difficult to see who in this house has the soul of a killer, Detective," Lester says. "The desperate eyes, the hunger, the growl of an animal. No human who would take a life can truly hide these things."
    "Great. Okay. So...?"
    "Peyton Alvarez."
  • "It was Peyton Alvarez, Detective," Lester says. "Have you not witnessed for yourself the madness that gnaws at the core of their being, brought on by irrational fear of the unknown?"
    "I guess not," you shrug.
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "The ex-gardener."
    "What?"
    "The killer was Alyssa Murphy's ex-gardener, Detective," Ray says.
    "Oh! I was expecting a wordier response."
    "I hope you will relish that feeling of surprise, for it is one of the few ways in which a person can prove she is alive."
  • "I can only assume it was Alyssa Murphy's ex-gardener," Ray says. "If you have witnessed for yourself the lizard-like quality of their eyes, Detective, you must undoubtedly have reached the same conclusion."
  • "We are all murderers, Detective," Ray says. "Every decision we make, every event we experience, kills our past self and creates a new woman to take her place."
    "...Okay, but I'm talking about Alyssa Murphy's murder specifically."
    "Ah. In that case, it was her ex-gardener."
When arrested
  • "I see," Perez says, and stands as the Officers Chaps enter the room. "I will not, of course, resist arrest, as I am fully aware of the amount of force a panicked human can bring to bear in such a situation. The human animal, when denied it's authority, will naturally..." As the officers drag him out the door, his droning voice fades into the distance.


Suspect: Paranoid (suspect_paranoid.gif, suspect_paranoid_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • As you enter the Ballroom, a wild-eyed woman accosts you, pointing with an outstretched and trembling finger.
  • As you enter the Attic, a small nervous-looking woman spins around with a startled look.
  • You walk into the Sunroom, which appears to be empty -- until a nervous face appears from behind the sofa.

Then one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "Help!" she yells. "They've come for me! It's the murderer!"
    "Settle down," you say. "I'm a detective with the police. I'm investigating the case."
    "Well, so you say," she says, glaring at you with suspicion.
  • "Who are you?!" she demands. "Police," you reply. "I need to ask you a few questions about--"
    "And how do I know you're telling the truth? I should just take your word for it? You could be anybody!"
    With a sigh, you pull out your badge and show it to her. "Happy?"
    "And I'm supposed to just trust that that's real? Well... all right. For now. But I've got my eye on you!"
  • "Who are you?!" she exclaims. "Don't come any closer or I'll call the cops!"
    "I am the cops," you say, showing her your badge.
    "Oh thank god! Thank god you're here! I'm going to be next, I just know it, you have to protect me!"
Returning
  • As you enter the Ballroom, Ava Chandler (the victim's lawyer) hides behind the sofa.
  • You walk into the Ballroom, and the victim's lawyer, Ava Chandler, screams and dives behind a curtain.
  • You knock on the Ballroom door and open it slowly so as to not startle the victim's lawyer, Ava Chandler. She's hiding underneath a table.

Then one of:

  • "Will you just settle the hell down?" you say. "You aren't in any danger. There's cops all over this place."
    "Oh! Oh, that's supposed to make me feel better?"
  • "It's all right," you say. "It's just me again. The detective."
    "Well, of course you'd say that!" comes the response. "How do I know you didn't just kill the detective and now you're wearing a detective skin to trick me?"
  • "Good grief," you mutter. "Come out of there, it's just me."
    "What do you want?" comes the frantic reply.
    "I just need to ask you some more questions."
    "Well, I don't see why I would have to come out there for that to happen."
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "Jack kept me safe! I thought nobody would dare touch him!" Jack babbles frantically. "But they had to. They had to kill Jack to get to me. And now they're coming for me next!"
  • "Jack was the only person in this house I trusted!" Jack laments. "Now that he's gone, I'm defenseless! Now there's nobody between me and them!"
    "Who?"
    "Them! You know, them!"
    "Oh right. Them."
  • "Jack was the only person I trusted! The only one who believed me!" Jack says. "I should've known they'd kill him! They killed him to get to me! I know it!"
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "Get along? Maya hated me with a passion!" Gianna says. "Oh sure, she was very polite on the surface, but I could tell by the way she looked at me that she'd strangle me to death if I ever gave her the opportunity!"
  • "Hated me! She hated me!" Gianna says. "She probably would have murdered me herself, if someone hadn't gotten to her first!"
  • "No way, she wanted me dead, just like the rest!" Gianna says. "It was pure luck that she didn't get the chance! But I'm next, I tell you! I'm next!"
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "I know him a little," Gianna says. "He's Maya's business partner. We don't talk much, but I'm pretty sure he's not part of The Conspiracy. He's just a dupe, like so many others."
  • "You mean Maya's business partner," she replies. "He's okay, I think. If he's an agent, they haven't activated him yet. But if they do, I'll know."
  • "Maya's business partner? Well, I don't trust him," she says, "but I don't think he's actively dangerous. At least, I haven't seen anything to indicate it yet. But I'm watching."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "No way, not on your life," Gianna says. "I wouldn't associate with Maya's creepy sibling if you paid me. Not even in gold. Or bitcoins."
  • "What, are you kidding me?" Gianna exclaims. "Maya's sibling? He's one of the most suspicious of the bunch! I've seen the way he watches me!"
  • "Maya's sibling?" Gianna says. "Oh no, no no no. I don't trust that man one tiny bit. For all I know, that's a lizard underneath that human skin."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "I think she's okay," Gianna says, glancing over her shoulder. "At least, I've seen no overt indications that she's been sent to get me. You'd better go to the Sunroom and check her out for yourself, though."
  • "No, she's fine, she's not dangerous," Gianna says. "At least I don't think so. Not right now. Everyone's got their price, though. Everyone can be bought. She's in the Sunroom, go check her out, see what you think. See if I'm right."
  • "Valeria Middleton? I think she's safe," Gianna says. "Maybe. I'm not sure, though. I can't be certain. I can't ever be certain. Always gotta be watching. Gotta keep an eye on her in the Sunroom."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I stay as far away from that woman as I possibly can," Gianna says, "and you will too, if you know what's good for you. Just keep out of the Smoking Lounge!"
  • "No way, I keep as far away from her as I possibly can," she says. "I don't even go near the Attic, because she has it all wired up with recording devices. She's in there now, probably copying the tapes! Go and see!"
  • "I don't want anything to do with that tool of the Illuminati," Gianna declares. "You can go talk to her in the Smoking Lounge if you want, but you better wear something metallic on your head."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh, you mean Gavin Chambers?" Gianna says. "I'm not one hundred percent on him, but I think he might be okay. I'm keeping my eyes on him."
  • "I've been watching him for unusual activity," Gianna says. "His name's Gavin Chambers. So far he seems to check out fine, but you can't be too careful these days."
  • "Pfft, Gavin Chambers is just a dupe, a patsy!" Gianna says. "He doesn't know what's going on around here. Maybe that'll keep him safe, but I doubt it."
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "No! No, never!" Gianna says, alarmed. "She's one of them! Her name's Khloe Levy, she's always watching me! Watching and waiting!"
  • "Khloe Levy? Stay away from her!" Gianna says. "I've seen her mail -- mission orders disguised as innocuous credit-card offers!"
  • "Do you mean Khloe Levy? Ha ha ha, are you kidding?" Gianna exclaims. "I'm not convinced that woman is even a real human being!"
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Don't know them," Gianna says, shaking her head. "I've seen them around, but we never talk. Can't risk my secrets getting out. They'll be in the Attic, though. Maybe you'll see something I haven't."
  • "I know who you mean," Gianna says, "but I don't know them well. I see them around. No suspicious moves yet, but it's only a matter of time. You can find them in the Attic, check them out for yourself."
  • "We haven't talked," she says. "I can't risk talking to people I don't know and trust. They're in the Library, if you think you haven't got anything to lose."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "No! Keep well away from that one!" Gianna exclaims. "They'rein the Attic, so stay out of there! Don't risk being subverted by that hypnotic gaze!"
  • "I don't even know who that is!" Gianna says. "Oh, I know who they claim to be, but that person in the Kitchen isn't who they say they are, you mark my words!"
  • "There's no such person!" she says. "Maya never even had a lawyer! Go to the Kitchen and ask them for yourself, you'll see!"
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Who did it?" Gianna asks incredulously. "Don't you get it? Don't you see? They all did it! They're all in on it together!"
    "In my experience, that's pretty unlikely," you say.
  • "If I knew that, I wouldn't be out of my mind with fear!" Gianna exclaims. "It could be any of them! Any of them!!"
  • "It could be any of them!" Gianna shouts. "Any of them, or none of them! It could be outside forces! Or maybe Maya committed suicide, don't you see! To put everyone off the scent!"
    "Well, I've seen the pictures," you say, "and I can pretty much confirm it wasn't a suicide."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Tell you who did it?" she says. "I don't trust you as far as I could throw a space-communications relay tower disguised as the Washington Monument! Why would I tell you?"
    "Well, if you don't know, just say so," you shrug.
    "Of course I know! They don't get anything past me! It was Makayla Delacruz!"
  • Paige looks around the room, and picks up a piece of paper and a pen. She writes the name "Makayla Delacruz", shows it to you, then stuffs it in her mouth and swallows it.
  • "I don't know who did it!" Paige says, really loudly. "I don't know a thing! Why are you even asking me? Even if I did know, I certainly wouldn't tell you!" And then she looks around and whispers, "It was Makayla Delacruz!"
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "If I tell you who did it, they'll kill me for sure!"Caroline says.
    "You think they'll do that anyway, though," you say. "If you tell me who it is, I can at least help avenge you."
    "Good point. Okay, it was Nicky's dental hygienist."
  • "I don't know," Caroline says suspiciously. "I still don't entirely trust you."
    "Look," you say, "if I was working for them, then I'd already know who did it, so it wouldn't matter if you told me."
    "...I guess you have a point. All right, it was Nicky's dental hygienist."
  • "Okay, I'll tell you, but I need police protection!" Caroline says.
    "You'll be fine," you say. "Who was it?"
    Caroline looks around, then whispers, "It was Nicky's dental hygienist."
When arrested

"What?!" Zoey shrieks. "I knew it! You're working for them! It's a set up!" The Officers Chaps enter the room, right on cue, and wrestle her into a pair of handcuffs. "You aren't even police! I knew it! You're goons from the Tri-Lateral Commission! Let go of me, you dirty Reptilloids! My website is gonna blow the cover off of your whole conspiracy!"


Suspect: Dude (suspect_dude.gif, suspect_dude_f.gif)

First time

One of:

  • As you enter the Family Room, a distinctive smell assaults your sinuses. A young woman wearing a tye-dyed t-shirt and a knitted beanie coughs in surprise, hurriedly stubs out her "cigarette" in a potted plant, and moves to open a window.
  • Inside the Wine Cellar, you find a young man in a tie-dye shirt and beanie, lying on the floor snoozing on some scavenged cushions. You kick his foot to wake him up. "Uh?" he says. "Wha? Oh." He stands up, knuckling sleepy, bloodshot eyes.
  • You walk into the Foyer, and find a young man wearing a tye-die shirt and a knitted beanie, lazily kicking a hackey-sack around. He looks over at you, surprised, and accidentally kicks the beanbag under an overstuffed chair. "Aw dangit," he says, kneeling down to fish for it. "I was totes on a roll."

Then one of <dossier message>.

Then one of:

  • "So uh, what's up man?" she asks. "I mean, Officer."
    "Detective," you say, flashing your badge.
    "Right on, right on. So what's the skinny?"
    "I need to ask you a few questions."
    "Okay, sure, yeah. Shoot."
  • "Uh, hey," he says. "Hi. Yeah. I'm Gavin. What's up, man? You solve this thing yet, or what?"
    "I need to ask you a few questions," you say, flashing your badge.
    "Wow, okay. Heavy. But yeah, sure. Hit me."
  • You show her your badge. "I'm investigating the murder of Evelyn Newman, and I need to ask you some questions.
    "Sure, right on," she says. "Ask away, man. Rock it."
Returning

One of:

  • You head back into the Foyer, and find the victim's bodyguard, Gavin Chambers, idly kicking around a hackey-sack.
  • You return to the Foyer, where Gavin Chambers, the victim's bodyguard is hanging out.
  • When you return to the Foyer, you find Gavin Chambers (the victim's bodyguard) snoozing on the floor. "Wake up," you growl.

Then one of:

  • "Oh, hey man, he says. "How's it goin'? How's the case? Find any, like, clues?"
    "I need to ask you some more questions," you say.
    "Sure, sure. I'm just chillin'. What's up?"
  • "Oh, hey dude," he says. "Listen, I don't wanna hassle ya or nothing, but is this gonna take much longer? There's a dope-ass party that I'm missing."
  • Hey, it's the dude on the case," he says. "You got somethin' else you wanna know?"
    "I have some more questions, yes," you say.
    "Killer. Lay it on me."
Him/Herself (positive)

One of:

  • "Aw man, Timmy was awesome," Olivia says. "I'm like for real broken up about this whole deal, dude. It's the worst! Who could even do that?"
  • "Aw, man. He was cool as hell. I'm gonna miss him. That man knew how to party, he didn't have a stick up his ass like most rich people. It's a real shame, dude."
  • "Heck yeah dude, me and Timmy were like that. It is a stone bummer that this happened. Just ain't gonna be the same around here, dude."
Him/Herself (negative)

One of:

  • "Well, I was just her bodyguard," he says. "We didn't party. Dang I don't think that woman even knew how to party. No fun at all."
  • "Pfft," Gavin says disdainfully. "Man, what a loser. All that cash, and like, no heart! She didn't know how to have fun at all. Can't take it with you, dude! That's what I say."
  • "Relationship?" Gavin asks. "Ugh. I mean, okay, I was her bodyguard, I guess that's a relationship, right? Yeah. But that was, like, it. Who has time to waste on a control freak like that?"
Name (positive, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Oh, that's Jasmine's accountant, dude!" he says. "She's great. Funny as hell. But, like, deep, you know?"
  • "Oh, she's cool," he replies. "Like, maybe you wouldn't think it to meet her, but like deep down, you know? She's good people."
    "Can you tell me anything useful about Maya Delacruz?"
    "Oh, uhh... Well, she's Jasmine's accountant, does that help?"
  • "Oh yeah, man!" Ryan says. "She's cool, she's a real bro. She's, like, Jasmine's accountant and stuff. We don't get to hang out much, but she's fun."
Name (negative, gives relation)

One of:

  • "Oh yeah," he says. "Yeah man. That's Maya's lawyer. I've run into her a couplea times. She's a real bummer, though. Like, zero fun."
  • "Oh jeez, Valeria Middleton is a total downer," he replies. "Like a primo buzzkill."
    "I need something more concrete than that."
    "Right, right. Umm... I think she's Maya's lawyer? Can't tell ya much more than that, man."
  • "Oh yeah I know her," he says. "I mean, kinda. We don't, like, hang. Real unchill woman. I think she's Maya's lawyer or something."
Name (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Oh man, all I know about him is that he's like the coolest! He's wild as hell, go check out the Attic and see for yourself!"
  • "Oh yeah, sure man," Gavin says. "He's a solid bro. He'll be in the Attic, that's where he hangs out. Tell him I said hey."
  • "Heck yeah, I know Clancy Miranda," he says. "He's like, crazy cool. He's a real trip. He's in the Attic, give him a high-five for me."
Name (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • "I met him once or twice," Gavin says. "He seemed like real bad news to me. He's in the Library if you're looking for him."
  • "Jeez man, I dunno much," he replies. "Except he's a total control freak buzzkill. Like, he's in the Library, so like, just check out that scene for yourself and you'll see."
  • "Well, yeah, I know him," Gavin replies. "But no. Not like know-know, y'know? We aren't, like, friends. He's pretty uncool, if you ask me. Real drag. He's probably in the Library, if you're looking for him."
Relation (positive, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh, that's Clive Bailey," Gavin says. "He's cool. Plays a mean hackey-sack, you know? You wouldn't expect that, but like, wow."
  • "Umm... oh, you mean Clive Bailey? I dunno, like, we don't hang out a lot, right, but he's pretty cool. Real casual."
  • "You mean Clive Bailey? Yeah dude! He's a riot! He's like, way cool. Real party animal, know what I mean?"
Relation (negative, gives name)

One of:

  • "Oh, jeez," Gavin says, rolling his eyes. "Him. Clancy Miranda. Phew, he's a real piece of work, dude. When he comes in the room, I'm, like, gone. Like 'No thank you,' right? Who needs that kind of drama?"
  • "You mean Clancy Miranda?" Gavin asks. "Yeah I kinda know him, I guess. Like I know him well enough to say hey to. And then get the hell out of Dodge because dang, man, right?"
  • "Oh, him, yeah. I know him, kinda," Gavin says. "His name's Clancy Miranda. I'm not real into him. He's a real buzzkill, you know?"
Relation (positive, gives location)

One of:

  • "Don't know 'em. I mean, not really," he says. "They're cool, but we're not like bros or anything. Check the Basement, maybe?"
  • "Hmm, dunno much, dude," Gavin says. "I guess look in the Basement? That's where I'd look, if I was looking."
  • "Golf caddy..." Gavin muses, then his eyes light up. "Oh, yeah, dude! I know who you mean. They're cool. Go check out the Basement, you'll find 'em there."
Relation (negative, gives location)

One of:

  • Gavin shakes his head. "Man, I got nothing to say about that freak. Try the Basement, if you wanna see a real headcase, dude."
  • "Jeez, man," Gavin says, shaping his head. "I know enough to stay the hell out of the Basement when they're there, which is like always, and that's all I need to know, right?"
  • "I know they're a drag to be around, and that's about it, dude," he replies. "I dunno, maybe like, check out the Basement and see for yourself? Hope you got a high tolerance for bummers though, dude."
Killer (no idea)

One of:

  • "Heck if I know, dude," he says. "Like, your guess is as good as mine, right?"
  • "Jeez, man, you got me. ...Ha ha, no wait, that sounded bad. I mean, like, you got me, not you got me, right? Like, I dunno who did it."
  • "Dang, dude, like, you're the detective, right? I dunno from this whole murder thing, I'm just mindin' my own."
Killer (suspect's name)

One of:

  • "Aw jeez, man. I can't be havin' people think I'm the sorta dude who talks to cops, you know? But, okay, it was Maya Delacruz. Just, like, keep it on the down-low, right?"
  • "Oh yeah," Ryan says, nodding. "You wanna know who did it, dude? I know for sure who did it. It was Maya Delacruz. No question."
  • Ryan looks over his shoulder. "Okay, well, you didn't hear this from me, right dude? But it was Maya Delacruz. Don't ask me how I know, but like, scout's honor."
Killer (suspect's relation)

One of:

  • "You wanna know who did it?" Madison asks. "Okay well like, hold onto your hat dude -- it was Billy Bob's lawyer! Like crazy, right? Like who would've guessed that? But it so totally was!"
  • "Dang, dude!" Madison says, "I wondered when you were finally gonna get around to asking that! Like, jeez, right? Listen, it was totes Billy Bob's lawyer. Like, for real."
  • "Okay, well, uhh..." Madison hesitates. "...Like I don't wanna be a narc or whatever, so I don't wanna name names, you know dude? But okay, I will say you should check out Billy Bob's lawyer. Like for real, you know?"

When arrested

"Woah, hey dude, what the hell?" Olivia exclaims, as the Officers Chaps enter the room right on cue. "Are you like friggin' kidding me, dude? No way! No way!" The policemen grab her by the shoulders and cuff her wrists as she struggles ineffectually. "This sucks, dude! This is, like, totally a set-up!"

The following messages apply to all the above people:

Him/Herself (intro, all people)

  • "Tell me about the victim, <Vic Full Name>," you ask. "Did the two of you get along?"
  • "Tell me about your relationship with the victim," you ask <Full Name>. "Did you get along well?"
  • "Did you know <Vic Full Name> well?" you ask. "Did you get along?"

Victim (intro, all people)

  • "If you had to guess," you ask, "who would you say did it?"
  • "Help me out here," you say. "You know all the people in this house. Who's the most likely killer?"
  • "Does anyone else here seem particularly suspicious to you?" you ask.

Name (intro, all people)

  • "Do you know someone named <Full Name>?" you ask.
  • "Are you familiar with someone named <Full Name>?" you ask.
  • "Do you know <Full Name>?" you ask.

Relation (intro, all people)

  • "The victim's <relation> -- do you know them?" you ask.
  • "Can you tell me anything about <Vic Full Name>'s <relation>?" you ask.
  • "Have you met the victim's <relation>?" you ask.

Dossier message (all people)

  • Your dossier identifies her as <Full Name>, the victim's <relation>.
  • "You must be <Full Name>, the victim's <relation>," you say, flipping to the relevant page in the dossier.
  • Judging from the dossier the Officers Chaps gave you, this must be <full name>, the victim's chauffeur.
  • According to the dossier, this is <Full Name>, the victim's <relation>.
  • According to the notes the Officers Chaps gave you, this is Ava Chandler, the victim's lawyer.

Accusation

One of:

  • "I just have one thing to say to you," you say with your eyes narrowed. "<name>, you're under arrest. Cuff him, boys."
  • "I just have one thing to say to you," you say with your eyes narrowed. "<name>, you have the right to remain silent."
  • "I hope you have a good lawyer, because you're gonna need one," you say. "Abigail Macias, you're under arrest. Cuff her, boys."
  • "Well, I've heard all I need," you say, flipping your notepad shut. "Gabriella Cannon, I'm arresting you for the murder of Serenity Caldwell."
  • "You'd better get your story straight before you see the judge," you growl. "Stanley David, you're under arrest for the murder of Serenity Osborn."

<role arrest message>

Success:

  • Despite her protests, Gabriella Cannon sings a very different tune under interrogation, and confesses that she murdered Serenity Caldwell <for reason>.
  • Down at the station, however, her story changes pretty quickly. It seems that she killed Jake Blackburn <for reason>.
  • Eventually though, the truth wins out: Paul Henson did indeed murder Nicky Duncan, <for reason>.
  • However, once she's down at the station, Zoey Ramsey soon breaks down and confesses to the crime. She murdered Andrea Sosa <for reason>.

Fail:

  • Unfortunately, once the lawyers arrive on the scene and more facts come to light, it turns out that Abigail Macias's alibi is air-tight. She could not possibly have been the killer, and in the confusion the real killer escaped scot-free.
    Which is worse: the knowledge that you failed? That you almost sent an innocent person to prison on a murder rap? Or the extra hour of paperwork that this generates?
    You failed, in X minutes. Oh well, you still get a paycheck, for what it's worth. (It's worth three dollars.)


Murder reasons

  • although he refused to admit the reason
  • for her money
  • in a fit of mindless, drunken rage
  • out of revenge for a failed business deal some years earlier
  • the usual old, tired reason: her money
  • though the true motive couldn't be comprehended from her frantic ramblings
  • to get back at him for some shady dealings several years ago
  • when some trivial insult turned hatred into mindless rage
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