Wild girl
| Wild girl | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 1570 |
| Locations | The Sunken Party Yacht |
| Hit Points | 450 |
| Attack | 325 |
| Defense | 350 |
| Initiative | 100 |
| Meat | 80-120 |
| Phylum | dude |
| Elements | sleaze |
| Resistance | ? |
| Monster Parts | arm, head, leg, torso |
| Drops | string of moist beads, go-go potion, extremely wet T-shirt |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting a wild girlThis girl was partying on board the yacht when it sank, and as the icy seawater (okay, as the bathwater-temperature seawater) closed above her head, something snapped inside of her. She became a beast, a feral thing, not even dimly self-aware, seeking only to kill and eat those weaker than she. She has gone wild, and she is not coming back.
Hit Message(s):
She leaps onto your back and gnaws at your neck. Eek! Argh! Ouch! Ouch! (sleaze damage)
She tries to flash you for beads. Most of her torso is encrusted with barnacles, but it's still pretty shocking. Oof! Oof! Ugh! Ouch! (sleaze damage)
She scratches you with her chipped manicure. God only knows what's trapped under those nails. Oof! Ow! Oof! Oof! (sleaze damage)
She kicks you with her totes adorbs jelly flip-flops. They go "squish" and you go "ew." Eek! Ouch! Ugh! Ooh! (sleaze damage)
She pulls a bottle opener from her bikini bottom and tries to open your <nipple> with it, unsuccessfully and painfully. Oof! Argh! Ugh! Oof! (sleaze damage)
She takes off her wet T-shirt and throttles you with it. Thank goodness she was wearing a bikini top underneath, so we didn't jeopardize our pg-13 rating. Ooh! Ooh! Oof! Eek! Ooh! (sleaze damage)
She wraps her legs around your neck and squeezes until you feel like your head will pop off like a pimple. It doesn't, but the resulting headache almost makes you wish it had. Ow! Ooh! Ugh! Oof! Ouch! Oof! Oof!
She attacks you with a bottle opener, but you're not a bottle, so it doesn't work so well.
She leaps at you to gnaw on your neck, but you never neck on the first date.
She tries to flash you for beads, but you hastily point out you haven't got any.
She tries to hit you with her wet T-shirt, but it's too sodden to do any real damage.
She tries to kick you, but her totes adorbs jelly flip-flops are too soft to hurt.
She tries to scratch you, but her manicure's totally shot from being submerged for so long.
She sees some brightly colored plastic beads tangled in some nearby seaweed. It must have set off a faint memory in her feral brain, for she heads over to the seaweed to snag them. (FUMBLE!)
 | You gain 80-120 Meat (average: 100, stdev: 8.56)* |
 | You acquire an item: extremely wet T-shirt (5% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: go-go potion (25% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: string of moist beads (30% chance)* |
Occurs at The Sunken Party Yacht.
References
- This monster overall is a reference to the Girls Gone Wild franchise.
