{{rewrite|comment=need below-maximum stat gain unit sizes}}
[[File:Tavern0.gif|center]]
<CENTER>[[Image:tavern.gif]]</CENTER>
'''The Typical Tavern''' can be found in [[The Distant Woods]] after an adventurer has reached level 3 and returned [[mosquito larva]] to the [[The Council of Loathing|Council of Loathing]].
[[The Council of Loathing]] sends you on a [[Typical Tavern Quest|quest]] to [[The Typical Tavern]] in [[The Distant Woods]] in order to take care of a bit of a rat problem.
<imagemap>
File:Typicaltavern.gif|center
You must have a minimum of 100 meat to adventure at the Tavern post-quest. If you have 99 meat or less, you receive the following message:
desc none
rect 175 392 235 447 [[The Distant Woods|Exit]]
rect 37 83 131 130 [[Bart Ender]]
rect 24 266 194 375 [[A Barroom Brawl]]
rect 277 290 372 372 [[A Suspicious-Looking Guy]]
rect 284 194 371 271 [[The Pool Table|A Pool Table]]
rect 314 69 378 143 [[Tavern Cellar]]
</imagemap>
<center>Why go to the tavern if you can't afford to drink?</center>
It contains:
*[[Bart Ender]]
*[[The Pool Table|A Pool Table]]
*[[A Barroom Brawl]]
*[[Tavern Cellar]]
*[[A Suspicious-Looking Guy]]
==Pre-Quest==
==Notes==
*In a [[Zombie Slayer]] run, the Brawl is replaced with A Quiet Corner:
:This is the first time you've ever seen this corner of the room without a constant brawl taking place in it. It's so quiet, it's frankly a little eerie. Spooky. Creepy.
:The dead bodies don't help much with that, mind you.
==Post-Quest==
[[Category:Locations|Typical Tavern]]
If you are either a [[Teetotaler]] or an [[Oxygenarian]], attempting to adventure here will get you this message:
<CENTER>You cannot adventure in the Tavern while you're on the Path you're on.</CENTER>
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With the exception of Len Scrafters, all adventures either take away ''n'' substat points, give you 2 * ''n'' substat points, or give you 5 * ''n'' substat points. The value of ''n'' depends on your level, but maxes out at level 15. At that level, ''n'' is equal to 50, so you can either lose 50, gain 100, or gain 250.
<center>
<TABLE CELLPADDING=3 CELLSPACING=0 BORDER=1px>
<tr style="background-color: #EFEFEF">
<td>'''Level'''</td><td>'''''n'''''</td></tr>
<tr><td>3</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>4</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>5</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>6</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>7</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>8</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>9</td><td>29?</td></tr>
<tr><td>10</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>11</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>12</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>13</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>14</td><td>?</td></tr>
<tr><td>15</td><td>50</td></tr></table>
</center>
All stat gains are subject to the phases of the moons, so the maximum gain you can get is 375 stat. (Are stat losses also boosted by moon phases?)
Losing adventures cost 100 meat, the minor wins cost 50 meat, and the major wins are covered by other bar patrons.
There is a rumor that wearing [[beer goggles]] while adventuring in the Typical Tavern would reduce the odds of getting a losing adventure; can anyone confirm or deny this?
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{{Adventure|name=A guy walks up to you at a bar|drops=[[beer lens]]|stat=None|meat=None|image=scrafters.gif}}
In a Zombie Slayer run, the Brawl is replaced with A Quiet Corner:
This is the first time you've ever seen this corner of the room without a constant brawl taking place in it. It's so quiet, it's frankly a little eerie. Spooky. Creepy.
The dead bodies don't help much with that, mind you.
