Source Agent

Source Agent
Monster ID	1945
Locations	wandering monster during The Source (path)
Hit Points	0
Attack	0
Defense	0
Initiative	0
Meat	unknown
Phylum	construct
Elements	None
Resistance	?
Monster Parts	arm, head, leg, torso
Drops
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting Agent Connor

A sunglasses-clad man in a flawless black suit stands before you.

"<Mr./Ms.> <playername>." he says, almost a snarl.

"Yes?"

"Oh... nothing." His lip curls. He draws his gun.

Hit Message(s):

Agent <name> hacks your internal body temperature regulation systems, causing you to start shivering uncontrollably. Ooh! Ouch! Ooh! (cold damage)

Agent <name> hacks the ambient temperature immediately around you, dropping it to a chilly zero degrees. Argh! Ouch! Oof! (cold damage)

Agent <name> makes your blood run cold. No, I mean literally. He can do that. Ouch! Oof! Ow! (cold damage)

Agent <name> hacks the air around you into pure oxygen and throws a lit match at you. Ouch! Ow! Ouch! (hot damage)

Agent <name> hacks your dataflags, setting "skin_on_fire" to "1". Oof! Ooh! Argh! (hot damage)

Agent <name> hacks your blood, turning it into sriracha sauce. Ouch! Oof! Ugh! (hot damage)

Agent <name> hacks your secret porn collection and posts it online. Ugh! Oof! Eek! (sleaze damage)

Agent <name> hacks your visual cortex, so everything you see is naked. Yes, everything. Eek! Ouch! Ooh! (sleaze damage)

Agent <name> hacks the exciting techno soundtrack into sleazy 70s porn music. Eek! Argh! Ooh! (sleaze damage)

Agent <name> hacks your audio-processing centers so that everything sounds like spooky ghosts. OooooOOOoooo! Oof! Ouch! Oof! (spooky damage)

Agent <name> hacks your "heebie-jeebies" setting to "maximum". Eek! Oof! Ooh! (spooky damage)

Agent <name> hacks your hypothalamus (or whatever) so that everything you see is super-duper frightening. Ooh! Ugh! Argh! (spooky damage)

Agent <name> hacks all the air in your immediate vicinity into farts. Just pure 100% farts. (stench damage)

Agent <name> hacks your olfactory systems so that everything smells like butt. Eek! Ugh! Argh! (stench damage)

Agent <name> hacks your opinions of everything you smell around you. It still smells the same, but you hate it. Oof! Ugh! Ugh! (stench damage)

You didn't even see him move, but you're pretty sure Agent <name> just crushed you in the head. Ow! Ouch! Ow!

Agent <name> smashes you with a reverse cobra knee. Ugh! Eek! Oof!

Agent <name> just punches you right in the throat so many times you lose count. Eek! Ouch! Argh!

Agent <name> leaps into the air and repeatedly tiger slams your knee. Argh! Ugh! Ow!

Agent <name> shoots you. Not very fancy, but it gets the job done. Eek! Argh! Argh!

Agent <name> shoots you with a pistol. I guess we're long past the point where that's a weird thing to happen in what is ostensibly a fantasy game. Argh! Eek! Argh!

Agent <name> fires a pistol at you, and you can clearly see the path of the bullet through the air as it goes straight into your <eye>. Ooh! Eek! Eek!

Agent <name> uses an explosively-propelled piece of copper-coated lead to put a hole in your leg. Eek! Oof! Ouch!

Agent <name> shoots a whole lot of bullets at you, ensuring that at least one of them hits. Ouch! Ouch! Eek!

Agent <name> shouts "BANG!" to make you dodge, and shoots a bullet at the spot you dodge to. Ow! Ow! Ow!

Critical Hit Message:

not known

Miss Message(s):

Staggers:

Agent <name> carefully adjusts his sunglasses.

Agent <name> gives you a bored and disdainful look.

Agent <name> grimaces and glares at you with barely-veiled disgust.

Agent <name> pauses to crack all the vertebrae in his neck.

Agent <name> straightens his tie and cracks his knuckles.

Blocked melee attacks:

Agent <name> assaults you like a raging monkey, but you block and redirect his attacks like a smoothly-flowing river.

Agent <name> attacks faster than your eyes can follow, but you calmly block every punch regardless.

Agent <name> attacks so fast you can't see him, but you block so fast it doesn't matter.

Agent <name> punches you about a million times, but your iron will allows you to withstand the assault without injury.

Agent <name> tries to panda-kick you, but you monkey-block.

Agent <name> unleashes a flurry of punches, but you cross your forearms in an X and his attacks do nothing.

Disbelieved hack attacks:

Agent <name> attempts to hack you, but the strength of your will denies him access.

Agent <name> attempts to hack you, but your belief in this version of reality is unwavering.

Agent <name> attempts to hack you, but your settings directory is write-protected.

Agent <name> tries to hack you, but can't breach your firewall.

Agent <name> tries to hack you, but you hack his ability to hack you.

Agent <name> tries to hack you, but your belief in your abilities is too strong for him to breach.

Dodged ranged attacks:

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but can't hit any of your weird shifting afterimages.

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but you casually step between the bullets as they crawl past.

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but you lean backwards impossibly far to dodge the bullet.

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but you hack the bullets into marshmallows.

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but you're no longer standing where he was aiming.

Agent <name> tries to shoot you, but you calmly pick the bullets out of the air and drop them on the floor.

Fumble Message:

not known

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After Combat

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Occurs every X turns while on the Summer 2016 challenge path.

Notes

• At the start of combat, after three Agents have been defeated that ascension, gives Latency:

Agent <name> hacks your data connection and slows down your packets.
Agent <name> steals your bandwidth by seeding a million H.265 video torrents.

You acquire an effect: Latency (duration: 1 Adventure)

• Regular skills, attacks and combat items will not work against this monster. Only skills from The Source will work. Familiars will not act.

Your normal attacks aren't nearly fast enough to make a difference here.

Your normal tricks aren't going to work against this guy.
That item would be hacked out of existence faster than you could use it.

<name> cowers, terrified.

• Attacks three times per round, plus an additional attack for every Agent that has been defeated that ascension.
• Has base stats of 40 HP, 30 Attack/Defense, +25% Initiative. Each Agent defeated that ascension adds 40 HP, 30 Attack/Defense, and +25% Initiative.
• Stat gains from this monster are multiplied by 5, and not subject to The Source's normal reduction of stat gains.