Laser lancing
| Laser lancing | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 647 |
| Locations | A Sinister Dodecahedron |
| Hit Points | Scales with player stats |
| Attack | Scales with player stats |
| Defense | Scales with player stats |
| Initiative | 0 |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | construct |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | barrel, hinge, leg |
| Drops | unstable laser battery, unstable laser battery |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting a laser lancingThis is a high-powered cutting laser, originally designed for slicing through hard, dense materials like iron and concrete. It's been re-purposed to slice through soft, fleshy materials, like you.
Hit Message(s):
It slices through your <bung>. At least the wound is automatically cauterized. Ooh! Ouch! Ugh! Argh!
It decides your <bung> is off-balance, and laser-levels it by cutting it in half. Argh! Ugh! Ugh! Eek!
It shoots a grid of laser-cutting goodness at you, dicing you like an onion. Ugh! Ooh! Ouch! Ugh!
It shoots a beam straight through your midsection. Hey, you were using those internal organs! Argh! Ow! Argh! Ugh!
It fires a "laser" at you, which "lances" you like a boil. Speaking of which, "boil" is what your precious internal fluids are currently doing. Argh! Ow! Eek! Eek! (hot damage)
It tries to shoot a beam through your midsection, but your doughy paunch absorbs and diffuses the beam.
It tries to slice through your <bung>, but you deflect it with a nearby mirror.
It shoots a laser-line across the room at you, but you jump over it.
It fires a lancing laser at you, but you quickly hold up that nasty boil you've been trying to get rid of. The laser lances it cleanly, and it heals immediately. Phew! Thank goodness you're rid of that boil you've had for ages! (FUMBLE!)
 | You acquire an item: unstable laser battery (50% chance)* |
| You acquire an item: unstable laser battery (25?% chance)* |
Occurs in A Sinister Dodecahedron.
References
- The word "laser" being in "quotes" is a reference to Dr Evil in Austin Powers, where whenever he says the word "laser" he uses air quotes.
