The Department of Shadowy Arts and Crafts
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The Department of Shadowy Arts and Crafts is the guild for Disco Bandits and Accordion Thieves and is located on the Wrong Side of the Tracks in Seaside Town. Here guild members can learn new skills and buy useful items.
Initiation
Shifty, the Thief Chief
Shifty decides whether or not you may enter the guild by giving you tasks and judging your ability to complete them. Upon completion of the first three tasks, you are elegible for training by Lefty. Upon completion of the fourth task, you are permitted to purchase items from The Shadowy Store.
First task
- The first task is to steal Paco's wallet (capable of completion with raw Moxie of 7, perhaps less.)
- Reward: Access to the Barrel full of Barrels, 2 giant moxie weeds, an enchanted barbell, and a rockin' wagon.
- Message when completing it:
- Shifty quickly moves the cards around on the table, seemingly at random. When they come to rest, you hesitantly point to the third card from the right. Shifty turns the card over, revealing it to be the Queen of Pointy Things.
- "Nicely done, Initiate," says Shifty. "Welcome to the Department of Shadowy Arts and Crafts."
- "Here, take these -- you can get more at the Barrel Full of Barrels, in the Big Mountains. I'll mark it on your map.
You acquire 2 giant moxie weeds
You acquire an item: enchanted barbell
You acquire an item: rockin' wagon
Second task
- The second task is to play 11-Card Monte (not capable of completion with raw Moxie of 11 (you get the Ace of Post-Hole Diggers), but capable of completion with a buffed Moxie of 12)
- Message before doing it:
- Your second task is a simple one -- we're going to play a straightforward game of 11-Card Monte. If you can find the Queen, you have passed the test.
Third task
- The third task is to steal a beer from the bar behind the bar (capable of completion with a buffed moxie of 16, but not a buffed Moxie of 15, which got me beat about the head and neck by the bar)
- Message before doing it:
- Only one task remains, Initiate: In the back room of this building, there is a bar. Behind the bar, there is a bar. You must sneak past the bar, and grab me a beer from the bar.
Fourth task
- The fourth task is to steal your own pants (completed with a base moxie of 16, buffed to 18)
- Message before doing it:
- You have done well so far, my friend. You have almost earned access to the Shadowy Store in our back room. In order to do this, you must complete another challenge: Steal your own pants, without alerting yourself to your presence...
- Message when completing it:
- You sneak up behind yourself and remove your pants before you realize what's going on. Nice work!
Message after completion
- You have already passed all of the challenges of your Guild.
Trainer
Lefty the Trainer
Lefty teaches Disco Bandit Skills and Accordion Thief Skills for a fee of 1,000 meat per skill level.
Shop
The Shadowy Store
Moxie-based characters who have passed the fourth guild task may buy wares here to aid them in any and all shadowy activities they might choose to pursue.
Items Sold
ye olde golde frontes: 1,500 Meat
bejeweled accordion strap: 2,000 Meat
moxie magnet: 3,000 Meat
References
- Post-hole diggers (Post-holers) may be a reference to the Sci-Fi show Firefly where, in one episode, post-holers briefly become the topic of discussion for some of the characters.
- The second task may be a reference to the band Queen, and a song of theirs, Play The Game.
Related Locations
- Other guild halls:
- The Brotherhood of the Smackdown for muscle classes (Seal Clubber, Turtle Tamer)
- The League of Chef-Magi for mysticality classes (Pastamancer, Sauceror)
