The Table
The kitchen table. The gathering place for families, the groaning board upon which nourishment is laid, the flat surface upon which the day's worries (and the mail) is laid. A powerful symbolic entity for the Pretentious Artist. It's also the place where he eats his breakfast.
| See what you've made so far |
You look at your kitchen table to survey what you have accomplished so far:
Initially:
- You've haven't managed to make any breakfast foods at all! At this rate, it's going to take you all day just to make a single meal.
After making a dish with the wrong utensil:
- You tried to do something new and innovative, but the result was jejune and barely edible. [meat?]
- You couldn't fully realize your artistic vision on a dish, and it's just a mess. [bread?]
- Despite your best efforts, one of the dishes you made isn't as arty or edible as you'd like. [potatoes?]
After making dishes with the right utensil:
- You've made a poignant plate of scrambled eggs.
- You've really pushed the boundaries of metaphor to make some waffles.
And then, initially:
- You sit down at the table, but something just doesn't seem right. The aesthetics of the meal are incomplete; you could no sooner eat this now than you could put a moustache on the Mona Lisa.
Or, after making five dishes:
- Your opus is nearly complete. It need now only be subsumed (and consumed) by the Artist's soul (and mouth).
| Eat your breakfast |
You don't yet have a full breakfast to eat. Breakfast is an art, and art takes time. Lots of time.
Or, once you've made 5 dishes:
You sit down to the troubled repast of an artist's soul. Like all great art, it nourishes your soul. Like all artists, you're just thankful you get to have something to eat today.
| You gain 220 Strongness. |
| You gain 180 Smarm. |
 | You gain 29 hit points. |
 | You gain 1 Mana Point. |
(The above was for making eggs and waffles, and screwing up the other dishes. Presumably different results possible.)
| Contemplate Existence |
You've eaten your daily repast, and the table contains nothing but the unwashed dishes of your lingering discontent.
- Occurs in The Pretentious Artist's Obsession
Notes
- This encounter doesn't use any energy.
- The first two buttons show up before you've eaten, the last one only shows up afterwards.
