Ice skate
| Ice skate | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 731 |
| Locations | A Rumble Near the Fountain and Ice Skate Territory |
| Hit Points | 600 |
| Attack | 400 |
| Defense | 400 |
| Initiative | 75 |
| Meat | 80-120 |
| Phylum | fish |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | head, fin, tail |
| Drops | collapsible baton, skate blade, skate skin, spangly unitard |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting an ice skateThis is one of the flamboyant skate punks that has taken over the skate park. It scoots along the ocean floor on a pair of vestigial blades, looking to ice members of the rival gang, the roller skates.
It's possible that this particular ice skate is actually a sensitive, artistic skate who puts up a tough-skate image but secretly has a forbidden crush on one of the roller skates.
It's possible, but it's not very likely.
Hit Message(s):
It impales you with the stinger on its tail. Too soon? Ow! Oof! Eek! Ouch! Argh!
It whacks you with one of its fins. Man, what a whackjob. Ow! Oof! Oof! Argh! Eek!
It skates up to you and slashes you with its blade. At least it didn't sling its blade, mm hm. Ouch! Eek! Eek! Ouch! Ooh!
It bites you with its little fishy mouth. Nothing hurts like it. Eek! Ouch! Argh! Argh! Eek!
It calls some of its fellow ice skates over to do a Triple Salkow and a reverse Lund on you. It hurts, in a kind of effeminate way. Ugh! Eek! Oof! Argh! Ugh!
It tries to slash you with its blade, but you sling it away, mm hm.
It tries to impale you with the barb on its tail, but determines that would be in poor taste. Too soon.
It tries to bite you, but its mouth is too small to latch on.
It tries to whack you with a fin, but you hash it a fin instead.
It stops attacking to do a few Triple Salkows and a backflip. Impressive, but not painful. (FUMBLE!)
 | You gain 80-120 Meat (average: 100, stdev: 8.56)* |
 | You acquire an item: collapsible baton (4% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: skate blade (2% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: skate skin (20% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: spangly unitard (15% chance)* |
| You gain some <substat>. |
Occurs at A Rumble Near the Fountain and Ice Skate Territory.
References
- The first miss message references the 1996 film Sling Blade.
- The second miss message references the death of Steve "The Crocodile Hunter" Irwin (making a similar joke that South Park did).
