The Avatar of Boris
Not to be confused with Avatar of Boris (challenge path).
The Avatar of Boris | |
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Monster ID | 1339 |
Locations | The Sorceress's Chamber |
Hit Points | 1000 |
Attack | 230 |
Defense | 190 |
No-Hit | 240 |
Initiative | 50 |
Meat | None |
Phylum | dude |
Elements | None |
Resistance | None |
Monster Parts | leg, torso, arm, head |
Drops | Thwaitgold firefly statuette |
Manuel Entry | |
refreshedit data |
This is the Avatar of Boris the Bold, the mightiest fighter in Loathing's history. His muscles have muscles upon them. He terrifies monsters with his bellow. He can demand a sandwich and the universe is compelled to provide him with one.
Basically, he's the ultimate jock, and Jarlsberg is the ultimate nerd. However, most nerds don't have the ability to transmute matter at the subatomic level with the sheer power of their will.
Hit Message(s):
Boris uses his thunderous thigh muscles to raise his kneecap straight into your groin. Your bellow of pain comes out as a squeak. Ow! Ugh! Ouch! Oof!
He hits you with the flat of Trusty, his axe. It hurts as much as getting hit with the blade, just spread out over a broader area. Oof! Ouch! Ooh! Ugh!
Boris punches you in the <skull> so hard you feel it in your <skull>. Ouch! Ooh! Ow! Argh!
With an earth-shattering bellow, Boris swings his axe in a spine-shattering blow. Ow! Eek! Ow! Oof!
He bellows a bellow so mighty it ruptures both your eardrums. Oof! Ooh! Ow! Ugh!
Boris flings Trusty, his axe, at you. It severs one of your favorite limbs before returning to Boris's hand. Ouch! Argh! Eek! Oof!
Boris hits you with his famed Bifurcating Blow. Thankfully, the Avatar of Jarlsberg manages to put up a forcefield to hold you together for the rest of the fight, but man, that smarts. Ugh! Argh! Ooh! Argh!
He starts a mighty bellow, but a fly flies into his mouth and he chokes and sputters.
Boris flings Trusty, his axe, at you, but misses. The axe slams into the wall mere inches from your head, and both you and Boris look shocked.
He tries to knee you in the groin, but his thigh muscles are so massive he can't raise his knee that high.
Boris tries to punch you in the <skull>, but you manage to duck out of the way.
Boris's legendary impatience kicks in, and he loses interest in the fight for a few minutes.
He tries to hit you with the flat of his axe, but you drop down flat on the ground and dodge.
With an earth-shattering bellow, Boris drops his axe on his own foot. That's what you get for naming your axe "Trusty" in a universe where irony is a major narrative force. (FUMBLE!)
- Item block (X chance):
![]() | You acquire an item: Instant Karma |
![]() | You acquire an item: Thwaitgold firefly statuette |
Occurs at The Sorceress's Chamber as a result of Of Might and Magic, if you are in the Avatar of Jarlsberg path.
Notes
- This monster has 50% elemental resistance (but no physical resistance).
- Unlike his minstrel, he can be stunned.
- The Instant Karma only drops if you are at Level 13