The Man on Fire
| The Man on Fire | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 2219 |
| Locations | The Orcish Frat House (Wartime) during Wildfire run |
| Hit Points | 2000 |
| Attack | 250 |
| Defense | 225 |
| Initiative | 60 |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | dude |
| Elements | hot |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | arm, head, leg, torso |
| Drops | really dense meat stack |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting The Man on FireDon't be fooled -- this man is neither Bing Crosby, Scott Glenn, nor Denzel Washington. This is the one you didn't hear about, because he's the one working behind the scenes, making the shady deals and connections and uh business stuff. He pulls the scenes behind the strings, and he's on fire because that's how he does business, baby. That's how he does everything. A B OF.
It's also real convenient for lighting cigars.
Hit Message(s):
He punches you square in the jaw. The giant gem on his class ring leaves a brand on your face that's actually kind of pretty. Ooh! Ouch! Ow! Oof! (hot damage)
He holds his solid baconstone letter opener in a fire for a while and then stabs you with it. Ooh! Ouch! (hot damage)
He whips out a giant, smoldering, chrome-embossed, ebony-and-sandalwood paddle and paddles you with it. Fancy! Ouch! Eek! Ooh! (hot damage)
He burns you with his giant cigar. You see that scar? It's about the size of a cigar. Do I stutter? Oof! Ow! (hot damage)
He whips out a molten glass ceiling and smashes it over your head repeatedly. No matter how hard you hit it or it hits you, you just can't seem to break it. (CRITICAL HIT!) Ouch! Ooh! Ow! (hot damage)
He tries to punch you, but gets winded from the effort and has to sit down.
He tries to paddle you with his custom-made paddle, but gets winded before he starts.
He tries to stab you with his solid baconstone letter opener, but baconstone is brittle and the point breaks off. There's probably a moral in there somewhere.
He suddenly stops and clutches his right arm. "Oh no, it's the big one!" he says. "Oh, I've wasted my life, I should have cared for my fellow man...wait, never mind, just gas." (FUMBLE!)
 | You acquire an item: really dense meat stack (100% chance)* |
Occurs at The Orcish Frat House (Wartime) in a Wildfire run.
References
- Man on Fire is the title of three films, released in 1957, 1987 and 2004, starring Bing Crosby, Scott Glenn, and Denzel Washington respectively.
- A B OF (Always Be On Fire) is a reference to ABC (Always Be Closing) from Glengarry Glen Ross..
