User:Civilizati 3

Civilizati 3: The Unknown Sub-Sub-Sub-Pseudo-Hemi-Semi-Apprentice Hero who does mediocre stuff!

Watch out for his bodyguards!

Be amazed at his player id! (#829984)

Notice his ascensions!

Softcore Ascensions

Accordion Thief

(got nothing special)

Hardcore Ascensions

Disco Bandit

1.)OC (OxyCore) DB: got plexiglass pants!

You hear things, and all of a sudden, Civilizati 3 lands in front of you, riding a sperm whale. The sperm whale morphs into a pair of plexiglass pants unexpectedly. Hey, where are the petunias? Civilizati 3 puts a curse on the the plexiglass pants. IT'S.... ALIVE!!!

You're Fighting A Pair of Plexiglass Pants

He/They/Her/It? get the jump on you.

They blind you with their utter shininess. Ouch! Eek!

You lose 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419 7169399375105820974944592307816406286208998628034825342117067982148086513 2823066470938446095505822317253594081284811174502841027019385211055596446 2294895493038196442881097566593344612847564823378678316527120190914564856 6923460348610454326648213393607260249141273724587006606315588174881520920 9628292540917153643678925903600113305305488204665213841469519415116094330 5727036575959195309218611738193261179310511854807446237996274956735188575 272489122793818301194912 Hit Points.

(How can you lose Pi Hitpoints? Who knows? Anyways, you lost them, so stop complaining.)

You try to hit them, but they resist, since they are so powerful compared to you.

They force you to see through them, and disappear. Hey, where did they go? They body-slam you. There they are! Argh! Ugh! Ow! Oof! Ooh! Oof! Ooh!

You lose 42 Hit Points.

In a last-ditch effort, you put on the pants, thus shielding you from any attack!

You win the fight!

That was lucky, though, so you gain no meat or stats. Cheater.

(If you have no idea of what the above was, scroll down to the penultimate paragraph.)

You acquire an item: plexiglass pants

Seal Cubber

2.) OC (OxyCore) SC Got Plexiglass Pike Pike!

You're Fighting A Plexiglass Pike Pike

After your tiring fight, you hear a flowery scream of "Oh no, not again!" and a bowl of petunias lands right in front of you. Civilizati 3 grins, says the magic words "42, 42, a plexiglass item is you!", and then a plexiglass pike pike is fighting you.

(Some people never learn, do they? This includes YOU, website viewer person-type thingy! You already tried fighting another plexiglass item! Sheesh, do you want to learn this the HARD way? Apparently you have no choice anyways, but get out of these situations and life might give you some meat and stats!)

It gets the jump on you.

It harmlessly pinks you on the finger Argh! Ow!

You lose 1.41421356237309504880168872420969807856967 1875376948073176679737990732478462107038850387534327641572735013846230912297 0249248360558507372126441214970999358314132226659275055927557999505011527820 6057147010955997160597027453459686201472851741864088919860955232923048430871 4321450839762603627995251407989687253396546331808829640620615258352395054745 7502877599617298355752203375318570113543746034084988471603868999706990048150 3054402779031645424782306849293691862158057846311159666871301301561856898723 7235288509264861249497715421833420428568606014682472077143585487415565706967 7653720226485447015858801620758474922657226002085584466521458398893944370926 5918003113882464681570826301005948587040031864803421948972782906410450726368 8131373985525611732204024509122770022694112757362728049573810896750401836986 8368450725799364729060762996941380475654823728997180326802474420629269124859 0521810044598421505911202494413417285314781058036033710773091828693147101711 1168391658172688941975871658215212822951848847208969463386289156288276595263 5140542267653239694617511291602408715510135150455381287560052631468017127402 6539694702403005174953188629256313851881634780015693691768818523786840522878 3762938921430065586956868596459515550164472450983689603 Hit Points.

(Stop whining about losing the square root of 2 Hit Points, 'cause you're not getting them back.)

You try to attack the weapon, but fail miserably. Gosh.

It harmlessly stabs you in the jugular vein. Wait a minute... That's not harmless! Ouch! Argh! Ooh! Argh! Ooh! Ouch! Eek! Oof!

You lose 55 Hit Points.

You trip over it, and knock it dead by coincidence. You pick it up and figure it's good for bashing!

You win the fight.

Life has no meat or stats when you cheat, bub. Cheater, cheater pumpkin eater.

You acquire an item: plexiglass pikestaff

Turtle Tamer

3.) OC TT got Plexiglass Pith!

You're Fighting A Plexiglass Pith Helmet

Since you forgot to remind yourself to care about even thinking about looking at you hitpoints, you decide to adventure again for some reason. Hey, with good pants and a sharp weapon, what can go wrong? A bowl of petunias shatters right in front of you, and slowly reanimates itself. Civilizati 3 goes and whispers something in its ear-analogue and tells it to kick your butt-analougue. Your mind-analogue tells your feet-analogues to run, but you're too much of a sissy little coward to even run! You stand motionless waiting for your fate, and the petunias pop into a transparent helmet made of plexiglass.

It's helmet time!

It gets the jump on you.

It misses you. CRITICAL MISS! Eek!

You lose 0.245621378674534534543 hitpoints.

You give it a massage. It emerges much relieved.

It goes up, takes a hammer, and hits you on the head. That was refreshing. (see chapter 62 in A Spot of Bother for more details) Eek! Ooh! Ow! Argh! Ouch! Ow! Ooh! Argh! Ouch! Eek!

you lose 88.4211 hitpoints.

You trip, and fall right under it. When you stand up again, you trap the helmet! A helmet catcher is you!

You win the fight!

You acquire an item: plexiglass pith helmet

Stop hacking into the game! It bums the servers! Now that you are a scapegoat, I will not give you your meat and stats! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Pastamancer

OC Pastamancer got Plexiglass pocketwatch!

You're Fighting A Plexiglass Pocketwatch

I you knew what time it is, then you get a gold star! I can't give it to you, though, because you're seeing it now! No gold star for you! Civilzati 3 winds it up and couts the seconds to your death.

It gets the jump on you.

It tells you what time it is. Information overload!!!!! Ugh! Ouch! Oof! Ooh! Ouch! Ugh! Ouch! Argh! Ow! Ouch!

You lose -5:30 hitpoints. Wait, what?

You attack, but suddenly stop to see what time it is. You look for your watch, and after twenty minutes, discover that your enemy has the correct time. You become so embarrased that you don't attack.

It tells you what time it is. Again. Super-mega-ultra information overload!!!Oof! Eek! Ow! Oof! Ow! Oof! Ugh! Ooh! Ugh! Ugh!

You lose 15:7Q hitpoints.

You muster up the strength, but finally, you say what time it is. The clock suffers 5,000,000,000,003 damage of obvious stating.

You win the fight!

No meat or stats from stating the obvious, bud...

Time Waster

If you come all the way from KoL , then thank you. I have wasted some amount of your life!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!

What the Hell was all of that stuff?

If you came here because I told you my website, then tell me what you thought about it. Thanks! Also, click on one of the links above or below this paragraph to the Kingdom. It's worth it. Please join! Or, you could also click on this little link over here (now it's not little, but still, gosh!)(Stop complaining!)(Seriously!)

Gifts!

If you come from KoL, and liked this website, tell me! I might consider giving you a free gift!

Okay, I got my weapons! NOW LET ME KILL THOSE BUNNIES!!

If you came here from Assassin010's page ,then congratulations. You've wasted alot of time. If you haven't, go away!!

You go to where all bunnies live. In your closet. Ten kajabajillizillion bunnies leap out at you!!!

etc. etc.

You attack with your plexiglass stuff!!

You deal a pathetic total of A hundred kajabajillizillion damage. BOOM! SOCKO! KA-POW! KAMEHAMEHA! BONGO!

You win the battle!!

Ten kajabajillizillion cute bunny carcasses lie before you. You know what to do now. You pee in your pants, making you suck so much that your suckiness creates a black hole, thus absorbing large amounts of energy.

All of the carcasses evaporate due to the process of photosynthesis.

All of the bunnies are destroyed. A WINNER IS YOU!!!

As a reward for your troubles, you get.... um.... NOTHING!!!

Congratulations again. You have wasted even more time.

Make your friends waste time by reading all this crap. Send them this link:

http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/User:Assassin010

copy and paste it in an email message and say "If you're extremely bored, go here! :)"

DON'T FORGET THE SMILEY FACE!!!!!

That is All!

Ignore all that you've read, because my accound got invalidated from inactivity. IGNORE IT!!!