Maximizing Your HP

Below is a comprehensive list of the best equipment to wear that directly affects your maximum HP.

Increasing your Muscle also has an effect on your maximum HP, at a base ratio of one HP per Muscle point. This ratio is improved to 1.5 HP per Muscle point if you are a Seal Clubber or a Turtle Tamer. Seal Clubbing Frenzy can also increase your maximum HP indirectly by raising your Muscle by two for a cost of one MP.

For these reasons, you may also be interested in the list of Muscle Modifiers. They are not listed alongside these items due to the variable nature of the Muscle-to-HP ratio.

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Legend
Ultra rares and Raffle House/Radio prizes	Tradable and still obtainable, but rare
Semi-rares and war hero drops
Mr. Store/KoL Con accessible derivatives	Tradable (directly or ingredients or zone access consumable), unlimited generation to those who own source, source no longer obtainable
Mr. Store/KoL Con items and inaccessible derivatives	Tradable, but no longer obtainable
Other limited time content
Clan Dungeon non-tradables	Untradable, but still obtainable
Other non-tradables
Non-tradables from past holidays and world events	Untradable, and no longer obtainable
*	Single-equip restriction, or two-handed/three-handed weapon
^	Equipment disappears at the end of the day or the equipment (or its associated enchantment) has a limited duration

Hat	Back Item	Shirt	Pants
battered old top-hat 500 Unkillable Skeleton's skullcap 500 (Turtle Tamers only) nurse's hat 300 Great Wolf's headband 250 (Seal Clubbers only) zombie mariachi hat 150 (Accordion Thieves only) Covers-Your-Head 100 (Disco Bandits only) guard turtle shell 50 sea cowboy hat 50 warbear plain fedora 50 catskin cap 40 reinforced beaded headband 40 black helmet 30 stainless steel skullcap 30	sea shawl 100 sea cape 30	sea salt scrubs 400 cool iron breastplate 200 wumpus-hair sweater 30 white snakeskin duster 10	Jeans of Loathing 500 weedy skirt 400 The Ghoul King's ghoulottes 100 leggings of the Spider Queen 50 warbear party pants 50 crotchety pants 40 double-ice britches 40 astronaut pants 30 palm-frond capris 30 turtlemail breeches 30 hippopotamus pants 25
Mainhand	Offhand	Accessory	Familiar equipment
lawn dart 300 black kettle drum* 30 elegant nightstick 30 giant cactus quill 30	lawn dart 300 complicated device 111% and 111 battered hubcap 100 stress ball 100 duct tape buckler 65 eelskin shield 55 Plush hamsterpus 50 six-rainbow shield 50 slime-covered lantern 50 wonderwall shield 50 snarling wolf shield 40	slime-covered necklace 200 hopping socks* 200 Gauntlets of the Blood Moon* 75 Caveman Dan's favorite rock* 60 sphygmomanometer 60 warbear goggles* 50 blackberry combat boots* 45 bejeweled pledge pin* 40 streetfighting champion's belt* 40 plastic vampire fangs* 30 shiny hood ornament 30 tiny plastic Ed the Undying 30 rusty chain necklace 25	Disembodied Hand familiar with lawn dart equipped 300 Disembodied Hand familiar with giant cactus quill equipped 30
Outfit	Effects and buffs	Passive skills, non-buff skills and others
El Vibrato Relics 0-1000	Preemptive Medicine 500% Nigh-Invincible 100% Gemini Rising 100% Song of Starch 50% Nutrient-Rich 50% Fitter, Bitter 50% Meat the Flintstones 50% Superveiny 9000 300 Cold Hard Skin 200 Digitalis, Dig It 200 Grape Expectations 50 Nuts about Candy 50 Thick-Skinned 50 Fishy Fortification 50 Juicy Boost 30 Reptilian Fortitude 30 Power Ballad of the Arrowsmith 20 Puddingskin 20	Spirit of Ravioli 25% Abs of Tin 10% Gnomish Hardigness 5% Irrepressible Spunk 5% A Few Extra Pounds 5-55 Slimy Sinews 2-20 Thick-Skinned 10 Mariachi Mood 3 Patience of the Tortoise 3 Saucemastery 3

Notes

• The passive percent boosters used to be multiplicative, but are now additive. See HP for details.
• This table describes only HP increasers; it would be more accurate to take HP due to Muscle into account. Since almost all effects from items or skills are stackable, maximizers should also buff their Muscle as much as possible. Choices usually only have to be made between what equipment to wear. From the HP page, Muscle classes want to wear an outfit that has the maximum value of

1.5 × EquipmentMuscleBuff + EquipmentHPBuff

whereas other classes should wear the outfit that has the maximum value of

EquipmentMuscleBuff + EquipmentHPBuff

• El Vibrato Relics must have El Vibrato punchcard (165 holes)(s) in the helmet, for every one you add it is 100 HP

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