Sabre-toothed goat

Sabre-toothed goat
Monster ID	84
Locations	The Goatlet
Hit Points	50
Attack	68
Defense	61
No-Hit	78
Initiative	80
Meat	44-66
Phylum	beast
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	head, leg, tail, torso
Drops	goat beard, sabre teeth
Bounty	billy idol
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting a sabre-toothed goat

This is a fearsome sabre-toothed goat. He's fierce, but handy if you need a can of tomato juice opened, and then eaten.

Hit Message(s):

He bites you with his sabre teeth. You feel the urge to visit the theatre, and maybe see a spectre. Eek! Ooh!

He gores you with his sharp horns and his sabre-teeth simultaneously. It's like being attacked by some minotaur-vampire hybrid. Ugh! Eek! Argh! Ooh! Ow!

He gnashes his sabre teeth at you and butts you in the head. And heads you in the butt. Eek! Ooh! Argh!

He does a little sabre-dance, goathandling you with his sharp hooves. Ugh! Ooh! Oof! Ooh! Ow!

Critical Hit Message:

He leaps high in the air onto the rocks above you, then dive-bombs you with sabre-teeth extended. He lodges them deep in your skull, which kind of itches, and scratches you with his goatee, which hurts like hell. Wait, reverse those effects. Ow! Eek! Ow!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to bite you with his sabre teeth, but gets his lower lip instead.

He tries to gore you with his horns, but gets a tooth trapped in the ground and trips. He should really be careful of those trip-traps.

He gnashes his sabre teeth at you. You give him a toothbrush and some toothpaste. You didn't know you had either a toothbrush or some toothpaste, but they're both gone now.

He tries to sabre-dance on you, but it's hard to dance on one's teeth.

Fumble Message:

He starts to trash-talk you, which is unusual for a goat. It doesn't really upset you, though, because he "tawks wike diff." Thank goodness for speech impediments! You laugh until you're sure you've gotten the goat's goat. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You gain 44-66 Meat (average: 55, stdev: 4.88)*

You acquire an item: goat beard (2.9% chance)*

You acquire an item: sabre teeth (4.9% chance)*

• If you are on the appropriate bounty hunt:

You acquire an item: billy idol (100% chance)*

You gain 17 <substat>.

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Occurs at The Goatlet. The drop rate of sabre teeth appears to be drastically increased in Bad Moon.

References

• The bit about "tomato juice" is probably a reference to "I've Got a Fang" by They Might Be Giants: "Glistening white triangular tooth / Open up a can of tomato juice".
• The reference to "visit the theatre" and "see a spectre" is probably a complaint about differences between American English (saber, specter, theater) and international English (sabre, spectre, theatre).
• The theatre bit could also be reference to a part in the book Interview with the Vampire, in which Louis is invited to "Théâtre des Vampires".
• The bit about the "toothbrush and some toothpaste" may be a reference to My Father's Dragon in which the main character gives a rhino a toothbrush and toothpaste to avoid being gored.
• "Trip-trap" is a reference to the traditional fairy tale Three Billy Goats Gruff, in which the bridge makes the sound "trip-trap" as the goats' hooves cross it.
• The Sabre Dance is a rather famous piece of orchestral music, noted for its high tempo and energy, and is commonly used in popular media to convey a sense of excitement.
• The "Wait, reverse those" line could be a reference to the movie Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, in which Wonka says "So much time so little to do. Wait, strike that. Reverse it."
• The lines about using the goat for opening cans of tomato juice and having to "tawk wike diff" may be a reference to a Calvin and Hobbes strip where Calvin uses similar lines to ridicule the sabre-toothed tiger.
• The line in the miss message "He gnashes his sabre teeth at you" may be a reference to the Norse god Thor's chariot-goat/snack "Tanngnjóstr", which translates roughly to "Toothgnasher."