Uniclops

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Familiar number: 94
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Uniclops
One eye and one horn a wink, a smile, but stand back (no depth perception)

Increases Meat drops and stats after combat

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Ability: Has the properties of both a Leprechaun and a Blood-Faced Volleyball

Throne/Bjorn: +2 Mysticality Stat(s) Per Fight, sometimes deals damage

Hatchling: uniclops egg

Familiar-Specific Equipment: eye 'n' horn shampoo

	Ultimate Cage Match	Scavenger Hunt	Obstacle Course	Hide and Seek

Mumming Trunk Abilities:

+15% Meat Drop	4-5 MP	+4 Muscle statgain	+15% Item Drop	+4 Mysticality statgain	8-10 HP	+2 Moxie statgain
			Bleeding damage*
*Hover for details

Cannot breathe underwater

Combat Messages

• Regular messages:

  Vs. monsters that drop meat, on the meat bonus

  <name> lays her head in your lap (no accounting for taste, I guess). You grab the extra Meat she has speared on her horn, and she smiles gratefully.

  <name> smiles proudly at you as she examines the body of your foe. Then she gives you the extra Meat she accidentally speared with her horn by examining too closely.

  <name> whinnies and tosses her head, her freakishly white teeth gleaming. She accidentally spears your foe with her horn, knocking loose some extra Meat.

  <name> whinnies, "look, it's a magical leopluradon^[sic]!" You turn to look, and when you turn back, she has some Meat speared on her horn for you. She grins mischievously as she hands it over.

  <name> whinnies, "might be innocent, might be sweet; not half as nice as rotting meat," and gives you some extra Meat, smiling innocently.

  Vs. all monsters, on substats.

  <name> lays her head in your lap (no accounting for taste, I guess) and smiles up at you, blinking (winking?) coquettishly.

  <name> tells you a story about her adventures on a mountain made of candy, smiling wistfully and blinking tears out of her eye.

  <name> tells you about the time she auditioned to run through replicant's dreams, smiling wistfully and blinking thoughtfully (and gerunding adverbily).

  <name> tells you a hilarious story about the time a former child star rode on her back. She laughs until tears stream from her eye.

  <name>whinnies, "why the long face?" and grins widely, blinking her eye.

• Enthroned in the Crown of Thrones:

  <name> lays her head in its lap, doing 15-25 damage with her horn. It's a wonder most unicorn stories don't end with perforated virgins, and that Perforated Virgins isn't a band already.

• Bjornified in the Buddy Bjorn:

  <name> sticks her head up over your shoulder, and you do 15-25 damage to your enemy with a polite (if sarcastic) bow.

• With lucky Tam O'Shanter equipped:

  <name> blinks her single, soulful eye beneath the Tam O'Shanter.

• With miniature gravy-covered maypole equipped:

  <name> does a festive canter around the Maypole.

• With wax lips equipped:

  <name> chews thoughtfully on the wax lips.

References

• A unicorn is an imaginary one-horned horse-like creature which, on catching sight of a maiden will curl up in her lap and go to sleep.
• Candy mountain and the magical liopleurodon are from the popular online animation "Charlie the Unicorn", much referenced elsewhere.
• "Why the long face?" is the punch-line of a joke that starts "A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says..."
• "May be innocent, may be sweet... ain't half as nice as rotting meat" is from the film Legend, whose plot features unicorns heavily.
• Replicants dreaming of unicorns is a reference to Blade Runner.
• The message about the child star probably refers to Neil Patrick Harris (played by Neil Patrick Harris) from Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay.
• The message about a child star is probably also a reference to the song "Child Star" by The Unicorns.
• "One eye, one horn" is a reference to the song "The Purple People Eater".

See Also

• Meat from Monsters
• Stat Gains from Fights