Guzzlr Client Selection: Difference between revisions
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**[[Crimbojito]] | **[[Crimbojito]] | ||
**[[electric snakebite]] | **[[electric snakebite]] | ||
**[[elemental caipiroska]] | |||
**[[elven cellocello]] | **[[elven cellocello]] | ||
**[[extra-spicy bloody mary]] | **[[extra-spicy bloody mary]] |
Revision as of 00:30, 23 May 2020
Welcome, valued Guzzlr team member! Select a tier below to accept a client.
With a client in progress:
- You can abandon this client and take a different one, but that EULA you didn't read limits you to one cancellation per day.
You have completed X Bronze Tier deliveries.
You have completed X Gold Tier deliveries.
You have completed X Platinum Tier deliveries.
With Gold locked:
- Make 5 Bronze Tier deliveries to unlock Gold Tier clients!
With Platinum locked:
- Make 5 Gold Tier deliveries to unlock Platinum Tier clients!
Abandon Client |
You give up on that delivery.
Bronze Tier |
You select a Bronze Tier client, <name>, a <species> from <location>.
<name> wants:
something
Gold Tier | [limit 3/day] |
You select a Gold Tier client, <name>, a <species> from <location>.
<name> wants:
something
Platinum Tier | [limit 1/day] |
You select a Platinum Tier client, <name>, a <species> from <location>.
Platinum Tier customers receive personalized Guzzlr cocktails. Premium ingredients have been dispatched.
An autonomous drone arrives almost immediately, dropping off a set of fancy cocktail fixings.
![]() | You acquire an item: Guzzlr cocktail set |
Don't take a client right now |
Maybe later.
Occurs on using your Guzzlr tablet.
Notes
- Abandoned deliveries count against your daily limit.
- While on a delivery, you get messages after combat indicating your lack of ability to find your client.
- After the fight, you glance around looking for <client>. There's no sign of them.
- You look inside <place>, but there's no sign of <client> there.
- You tap a random <species> on the shoulder and ask if they're <client>, but they aren't.
- You finally manage to track down <name>.
- Clients offer rewards of Guzzlrbucks and stat points after you give them their delivery. The first client delivery of the day takes 11 turns; each after that takes ~5 turns longer.
- Bronze tier clients offer 2-4 Guzzlrbucks and 10 of each stat.
- Gold tier clients offer 5-7 Guzzlrbucks and 50 of each stat.
- Platinum tier clients offer 20-25 Guzzlrbucks and 150 of each stat.
- Bronze clients can ask for:
- Gold clients can ask for:
- backwoods screwdriver
- Bowl of Scorpions
- Caipiranha
- Cobb's Knob Wurstbrau
- Crimbojito
- electric snakebite
- elemental caipiroska
- elven cellocello
- extra-spicy bloody mary
- fountain 'soda'
- hacked gibson
- herringcello
- hot watered rum
- Mad Train wine
- martini
- melted Jell-o shot
- moonberry wine cooler
- Morlock's Mark Bourbon
- Murderer's Punch
- ocean motion
- painting of a glass of wine
- pink pony
- rockin' wagon
- rodeo whiskey
- roll in the hay
- salinated mint julep
- sangria
- Siberian sunrise
- slip 'n' slide
- soft green echo eyedrop antidote martini
- spooky eggnog
- strawberry wine
- Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chimichangarita
- white lightning
- wasabi-infused sake
- Species include:
- Alien
- Tikbaz Sectik
- Vazfod Pelvob
- Attorney
- Clara Mercer, Esq.
- Gamer
- PastaBeastLord
- UltraGreatChiefalicious
- UltraRumFettuciniChefarino999
- WeirdDaft Ted
- WeirdStinky Jackmaster
- Hobo
- Jake "Rottencrotch" Westinghous
- Dandy "Halitosis" McDurkeee
- Mickey "Curiously Dense" Nichols
- Ralph "Dart-Hurling" Capulet
- Quinn "Candy Cane" Mills
- Pirate
- Comprehensive Reynaldo Chartreuse
- Extra Jack Goat
- Female Steven Rose
- Fleshy Jack Crimson
- Individual Jack Blue
- Principal Jack Lizard
- Signed Jack Pig
- Scientist
- Dr. Benny Jones
- Dr. Chip Shelton
- Dr. Jane Hale
- Dr. Patrick Simmons
- Dr. Ralph Cooke
- Skeleton
- Coccyx Salisbury
- Femur Nite
- Fibula Lennon
- Skull Hernandez
- Skull Stemple
- Sorority Orc
- Ainsli Whittingstall
- Brittni St. Cloud
- Danni Sheltonbury
- Missi Witchburn
- Staci Hillings
- Vampire
- Barnabas Ogletomb
- Cassius Bloodbane
- Gabriel Greysteam
- Lucius Burnsweat
- Remus Grodgrave
- Alien
- Each species type has a unique ending message:
- "Thank you for this delivery of entertaining hu-man fluid. Please accept this hu-man gratuity."
- "Thank you. This will help me with my... legal matters. Here, take this for your trouble."
- "Thank you. This will provide energy for my intense gaming needs. Please accept this tip."
- "Don't mind if I do! And here, don't mind if you do either."
- "Arr. Thanks. This'll set my sheets to the wind. Have a couple of pieces of eight for your trouble."
- "The reagent! At last! Thank you, here's your consultation fee."
- "Thanks! Say, you didn't happen to bring a mop, did you? No? Oh well. Oh right, here's your tip..."
- "Omigod, thank you thank you thank you! Here, here's a little something for your trouble. Byeeeee!"
- "Blah. Here."