Blockin' Out the Scenery (Frat Boy Ensemble)
You sneakily, stealthily, unobtrusively, covertly sneak your way into the hippy camp. Exhausted from carrying all those adverbs around, you take a deep breath, lean back against a nearby pole, and rest for a minute. When you stand back up, you see that the pole you were leaning on is really a signpost, and the sign on top of it is some kind of directory for the hippy camp. You see a star that says "You Are Here (But Where's Your HEAD, Man?)" and near it three different buildings. Toward which one would you like to head?
| The Chill-Out Yurt |
You step into the yurt marked as the "Chill-Out Yurt" on the map. You see a lot of cushions on the floor, a few glass "sculptures," and lots of trippy artwork on the walls. You cautiously step into the tent, and hear a strange bubbling noise. Before you can react, you're engulfed in thick white smoke. Oh no! Someone set up you a smoke bomb!
You start to panic, then inhale a little of the smoke, cough, and feel a lot more relaxed. Apparently it wasn't a bomb at all -- just the normal herbal smoke you get whenever a funk of hippies have too much time on their hands.
You spend the next few hours communing with the mystic (which is a fancy way of saying "staring at your hands"). When the effect wears off, you continue on your way, but you feel much more in tune with magic than you did when you started. The magic? The magics? The magicks? Whatever.
| You gain 50 Wizardliness. |
| The Rations Yurt |
You sneak into the yurt where the hippies keep all of their rations. This time, though, you're not out to sabotage, but to pilfer. Or purloin, if that works better for you. You fashion a rationale for grabbing their rations, even though you don't have a passion for the food itself. Anything that hurts the hippy army is good for your side, right?
You grab some organic, cruelty-free food and drink, then make like a drum and beat it. Or make like what you do at a drum circle, and leave. Let's hope none of the frat brothers see you with this stuff -- you won't be able to sit down for a week. And they'll probably paddle you, too.
 | You acquire an item: cruelty-free wine |
 | You acquire an item: handful of walnuts |
 | You acquire an item: Genalen™ Bottle |
 | You acquire an item: mixed wildflower greens |
| You acquire an item: thistle wine |
Until July 10, 2007, this adventure was unfinished, instead giving:
 | You acquire an item: seal-clubbing club |
| The H.A.S.H. Yurt |
You sneak into the H.A.S.H. (Hippy Army Surgical Hospital) Yurt, hoping to hear some wacky surgeons making jokes in order to withstand the horrors of war, but instead you see a hippy lying in a hospital bed, tossing and turning and moaning. As you come closer, he says:
"Dude, Peaceflower, is that you? I can't see you... come into the light. Man, I never thought the war was going to be like this, man... you wouldn't believe where I have bruises from those paddles. Those guys -- they don't understand anything about peace and love, man."
He has a coughing fit, then sits bolt upright. "I can see the light, Peaceflower! It's so beautiful... all my friends are there, man... they want me to go join them."
"No!" you say, before you're aware you're saying anything. "Go away from the light, man! It's not your time!"
"Hey, woah," he says, his eyes focusing. You aren't Peaceflower. You're a frat boy! Stay away from me, man!"
You guiltily sneak back out before he raises the alarm. You didn't realize the raw truth of this war. Then you start thinking about "raw war," and feel vaguely palindromic.
Occurs at The Hippy Camp (Verge of War).
Notes
- If you're wearing the Frat Warrior Fatigues, you will encounter Blockin' Out the Scenery (Frat Warrior Fatigues) instead.
- You will receive at least 2 of the items listed when selecting the Rations Yurt adventure.
References
- One of the possible third options, "The H.A.S.H Yurt," is a reference to the TV show M*A*S*H, and possibly the psychoactive drug hashish.
- The name of this adventure, apropos of its content, is a reference to Five Man Electrical Band's song "Signs", which features themes and content relevant, in a broad sense, to hippy culture and attitudes; the song's lyrics read, in part, as follows: "Sign, sign, everywhere a sign / Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind / 'Do this!' 'Don't do that!' 'Can't you read the sign?'"
- "Someone set up you a smoke bomb" is a reference to the Engrish found in the game Zero Wing, which was also the source of the most overused internet meme in existence: All Your Base.
- The line "Exhausted from carrying all those adverbs around" could be a nod to School House Rock's "Unpack Your Adjectives."
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The Hippy Camp (Verge of War) Choice Adventures | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Bait and Switch | Blockin' Out the Scenery | The Thin Tie-Dyed Line | ||||||
| Take the bait and go wreak havoc | gain 50 Beefiness | The Chill-Out Yurt | gain 50 Magicalness | The Munitions Yurt | 2-5 water pipe bombs | |||
| Gaffle some bait for later | 2-5 handfuls of ferret bait | The Rations Yurt | cruelty-free wine, handful of walnuts, Genalen™ Bottle, mixed wildflower greens, thistle wine | The Rations Yurt | gain 50 Sarcasm | |||
| Wake the cadet up and fight him | fight a War Hippy (space) cadet | (The Lookout Tower / The H.A.S.H. Yurt) | (start the war / nothing) | The Barracks Yurt | Fight a War Hippy drill sergeant | |||
