Marcus Macurgeon
| Marcus Macurgeon | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 1133 |
| Locations | The Maelstrom of Lovers |
| Hit Points | 75% of Monster Defense |
| Attack | Player's Moxie+2 (min 10, max 150) |
| Defense | Player's Muscle+2 (min 10, max 150) |
| Initiative | 50 |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | undead |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | head, arm, leg, torso |
| Drops | jar full of wind, jar full of wind, jar full of wind, purple prose pen |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting Marcus MacurgeonMarcus Macurgeon, all sallow and paunchy,
Wrote volumes of poetry terribly raunchy.
He wrote with no shortage of details explicit,
To tell of encounters bizarre and illicit,
Of creams and of oils and of sweaty exertion,
He catalogued every unseemly perversion!
So all were surprised to hear Marcus Macurgeon
Lived all alone and he died still a virgin.
Hit Message(s):
The next poem he reads isn't raunchy or dirty
Just painfully bad and unbearably wordy.
He reads you a rather lascivious rondel,
In which there is many a grope and a fondle. (sleaze damage)
He reads you a rather risque villainelle,
With some unlikely acts by a young mademoiselle. (sleaze damage)
He reads you a limerick ribald and ripe,
The rhyme that he puts at the end of it: Yipe! (sleaze damage)
He reads you a poem that's so naughty, you blush,
That blush makes your cheeks flush and your veins turn to mush! (sleaze damage)
He reads you a poem but you block both your ears
So you don't hear about all those boobies and rears.
He asks if you'd like a quick roll in the hay,
You decline, to which he responds, "oh. Okay."
You turn a deaf ear to the poems that he's reading
And thus you are spared from a bout of ear-bleeding.
He tells you a tale of a girl and a sheep,
But you just count sheep until you're fast asleep.
Marcus's muse strikes, so he leaves the fight,
To write poems of more sordid deeds done in the night.
Marcus's muse strikes, so he leaves the fight,
To write poems of more sordid deeds done in the night. (FUMBLE!)
 | You acquire an item: jar full of wind (80% chance)* |
| You acquire an item: jar full of wind (2% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: purple prose pen (20% chance)* |
Occurs at The Maelstrom of Lovers.
