PirateRealm Guide
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This is your guide to sailing the seas of PirateRealm, a monorail destination available after using a PirateRealm membership packet.
Overview
Once per day, you can make a journey through PirateRealm. You start at Port Beginning, where you select one crewmate, one curio, and a ship for the day's journey. You then choose from a selection of island destinations and progress through several sailing adventures to get there. The first island consists of 4 fights and a final adventure that may be a reward or boss fight. The sequence of sailing and island adventures repeats for second and third island destinations, although the third island contains 9 fights before a final reward adventure or boss.
You must wear a PirateRealm eyepatch (provided) which limits your base stats to 20, and your buffed stats must not be higher than 100.
There are 6 stats to keep track of while Sailing the PirateRealm Seas:
- Guns determine your chances of winning fights against other ships and sea serpents. Can be bought from the shops or retrieved from defeated civilian ships, sometimes.
- Grub and Grog are spent at the end of every Sailing adventure. Can be gained and lost in various ways, such as found on other ships, bought, accidentally dropped or used to calm the crew. Running out of one of them forces you to spend an adventure looking for some. Running out of both simultaneously simply gives the scavenging adventures back to back.
- Glue is needed to repair your ship if it gets damaged from losing against another ship, a sea serpent or failing to outrun a storm. Not having glue to use forces you to waste an adventure waiting for help, only giving 1 Fun.
- Gold is used to buy other resources from the occasional shop ships, or to calm the crew. Found from shipwrecks, winning against other pirates, and in various ways, depending on your Curio, Crewmate and island of choice.
- FunPoints are gained at every adventure and are spent by using the Quest item PirateRealm Fun-a-Log; they don't disappear at rollover or ascension.
Preparations
Each journey starts with your selection of one crewmate, one curio, and a ship for the day's journey.
Crew
Each crewmate is randomly generated with an adjective and a role. Two random crewmates are available daily at Groggy's Tavern. A third choice becomes permanently available after rescuing a prisoner from Prison Island with the ancient skull key.
- Adjectives
- Beligerent - Unlocks Jungle Island. Can find an extra Gun from shipwrecks.
- Dipsomaniacal - Can give one Grog after combat. Can find extra Grog from shipwrecks.
- Gluttonous - Can give one Grub after combat. Can find extra Grub at shipwrecks. Helps when running out of Grub.
- Pinch-Fisted - Gives 5-10 Gold at the end of PirateRealm combats. Increases Gold yields from sinking pirate ships.
- Wide-Eyed - Unlocks Skull Island. Bonus fun when counting birds in Smooth Sailing.
- Roles
- Coxswain - ???
- Cryptobotanist - Unlocks Jungle Island, helps when running out of Grog.
- Cuisinier - Unlocks Dessert Island, helps when running out of Grub, bonus fun for eating in Smooth Sailing.
- Harquebusier - Unlocks Skull Island, deals damage in combat, and gives +1 fun from fights.
- Mixologist - Required to unlock Island Drinkin', a Tiki Mixology Odyssey at Tiki Island, bonus fun for drinking in Smooth Sailing.
Curios
bloody harpoon: +100% weapon damage in PirateRealm. Defeating a sea serpent gives 300-400? gold and unlocks plush sea serpent in Fun-a-Log.
cursed compass: +100% item drops in PirateRealm. Can be sold for 500 gold and subsequently recovered from a shipwreck to unlock Jack's Hideout.
ancient skull key: Shipwreck Salvage adventures will give 100-200 extra gold. Unlocks Prison Island.
curious anemometer: Unlocks Trash Island and improves odds on outrunning a storm
- Unlocked in The Calm After the Storm, after beating Storm Island.
Red Roger's flag: Increases the number of naval combat adventures while sailing.
- Unlocked by defeating Red Roger.
Glass Jack's spyglass: Unlocks Key Key.
- Unlocked by defeating Glass Jack Hummel.
Ships
| Ship | Speed (turns to travel between islands) |
Guns | Grub | Grog | Glue |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Rigged Frigate | 7 turns | 3 | 10 | 10 | 1 |
| Intimidating Galleon | 7 turns | 4 | 8 | 8 | 0 |
| Speedy Caravel | 6 turns | 1 | 5 | 5 | 1 |
| Swift Clipper | 4 turns | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 |
| Menacing Man o' War | 9 turns | 8 | 5 | 30 | 0 |
The Swift Clipper and The Menacing Man o' War are unlocked by ???
Sailing adventures
Each sailing adventure costs 1 grub and 1 grog.
- Defeating the monster gives 10-15 grub and 8 fun. If you have the bloody harpoon curio, instead you get 300-400 Gold and 10 fun and unlock the plush sea serpent in the Fun-a-Log.
- If you lose, you get 7 fun.
- Fleeing gives 5 fun.
- If you attack the ship and win, gain 6 fun and one of: 50-60 gold, 1 gun, 3-10 grub, or 3-10 grog.
- If you lose, gain 4 fun and your ship is broken.
- Leaving them alone gives 4 fun.
- Searching the wreckage gives 91-112 gold and 5 fun. Additionally gives: 1 gun with a Beligerent mate, 3 grub with a Gluttonous mate, 3 grog with a Dipsomaniacal mate, and ? more gold with an ancient skull key.
- If you previously sold your cursed compass to a shop ship, obtain a recursed compass and 10 fun.
- High Tide, Low Morale - Appears periodically when your crew's morale is low. Occurs approximately every 5th sailing adventure, though the interval can vary. (Currently unknown if anything else influences morale.)
- Spend either 3 grub, 3 grog, or 30 gold to get 5 fun.
- Doing a little dance (free) gives 1 fun (twice).
- Buy 5 grub, 5 grog, or 1 glue at the cost of 10 gold each.
- Buy a gun for 200 gold
- Sell cursed compass curio for 500 gold
- Having a snack costs 1 grub to get 5 fun (+2 with Cuisinier mate)
- Having a cocktail costs 1 grog to get 5 Fun (+2 with a Mixologist)
- Bridwatching gives 3 fun (+3 with a Wide-Eyed mate)
- Battening the hatches gives 5 fun.
- Trying to outrun the storm gives 8 fun. Chance of success is improved by ship speed?, having a Coxswain as a crewmate? and curious anemometer curio. If successful, reduces your travel time to the next island by 1 turn. If failed, breaks your ship.
- Fight another pirate ship. If you win, get 50-60 gold, (sometimes) a gun, and 8 fun.
- If you lose, you will still gain 7 fun, but may lose 3 grub, lose 3 grog, lose 26-30? gold, or your ship may be broken.
- Fleeing-?
Emergency adventures occur on the next sailing encounter if your ship has suffered a malfunction:
- Grog for the Grogless occurs if you have no grog.
- Ferment seawater for 5 grog and 1 fun. Bonus for Cryptobotanist mate?
- Dive for casks to gain 1-5 grog and 3 fun. Bonus for Dipsomanical mate?
- The Starboard is Bare occurs if you have no grub.
- Catch fish for 5 grub and 1 fun. +3 grub with a Gluttonous mate.
- Dive for 1-5 grub and 3 fun.
- The Ship is Wrecked occurs if your ship was broken in the previous adventure. This adventure does not count as progress toward the next island, so encountering it means your journey will be 1 adventure longer.
- Repairing with glue gives 5 fun.
- Waiting for assistance gives only 1 fun.
Island adventures
All non-boss monsters give 3 fun except for the plastic skeleton (4 fun) and plastic pirate (7 fun).
Island 1
- Monsters: melty army man - Drops melty plastic grenade (combat item that deals scaling stench damage and elementally aligns enemy)
- Reward: 3 guns
- Monsters: giant crab - Drop 1 grub
- Boss: giant giant crab - Gives 17 fun and drops 2000 base meat. Unlocks the crabsicle in the Fun-a-Log.
- Monsters: translucent monkey - Drop 1 grog
- Reward: Some base booze. Unlocks bottle of dark rhum, bottle of extra-dark rhum, bottle of super-extra-dark rhum in the Fun-a-Log.
- Requires a Cuisinier crewmate.
- Monsters: melty freezeface - Drop oversized ice molecule (1-size spleen item, gives 50 turns of +5 cold res, +25 cold damage, +50 cold spell damage)
- Reward: cocoa of youth, a usable item that extends the duration of up to 10 of your effects by 5 Adventures.
- Requires Glass Jack's spyglass curio.
- Monsters: plastic pirate - Drop 7 fun each.
- Reward: A Daily Dungeon key
- Requires a Wide-Eyed or Harquebusier crewmate.
- Monsters: plastic skeleton - Drop 5-10 Gold and 4 fun each.
- Reward: tomb-opener, which can be used on Cemetery Island to obtain the map to Red Roger's Fortress, giving one of Red Roger's parts.
Island 2
- Monsters: toy dinosaur
- Reward: Unlock pirate shaving cream in the Fun-a-Log. Subsequent visits yield 30 fun.
- Monsters: plastic skeleton, vape ghost - Fights give 10-15 gold.
- Reward: With tomb-opener, obtain Red Roger's map and 20 fun. Otherwise, gain 10 fun.
- Requires a Beligerent or Cryptobotanist crewmate
- Monsters: translucent monkey
- Boss: jungle titan - Gives 17 fun and unlocks conquistador's breastplate in the Fun-a-Log.
- Requires curious anemometer curio
- Monsters: cockroach - Drop 1 grub and 1 grog
- Reward: Your Empire of Dirt - Obtain random items from throughout the game.
- Requires ancient skull key curio
- Monsters: plastic pirate - Drop 7 fun each.
- Reward: First time, permanently adds a third crewmate option and gives 10 fun. Subsequent visits yield 20 fun.
Island 3
- Monsters: signal - Drops signal fragment
- Boss: pirate radio - Unlocks pirate radio ring in the Fun-a-Log.
- Monsters: tiki idol - Drops one of the tiki cocktail garnishes: hibiscus petal, huge mint leaf, or pineapple slab.
- Reward: With a Mixologist mate, unlock Island Drinkin', a Tiki Mixology Odyssey in the Fun-a-Log. Otherwise, get 10 fun.
- Monsters: strong wind - Reduces all damage sources to 1. Drops windicle, a combat item that runs away and reduces the number of combats on a PirateRealm island.
- Reward: Unlocks curious anemometer curio. Subsequent visits yield 10 fun.
- Requires Red Roger's map
- Monsters: plastic pirate - Drop 7 fun each.
- Boss: Red Roger - Drops 17 fun and Red Roger's reliquary, which contains one of his four body parts
- Requires recursed compass
- Monsters: carnivorous plant
- Boss: Glass Jack Hummel - Reduces all damage sources to 10 and has 200 HP. Use multiple damage sources, elemental damage, and passive damage. Drops 17 fun and unlocks the Glass Jack's spyglass curio.
- Requires you to equip all four pieces of Red Roger gear when entering the island #3 choice adventure.
- Monsters: plastic skeleton, pewter torsohunter - Drops pewter shavings (size-1 spleen item that gives 100 Adventures of damage absorption +250, damage reduction: 25)
- Reward: First visit: Red Roger's skull (familiar hatchling) and unlocks Red Roger tattoo kit in the Fun-a-Log, Subsequent visits give 10,000 meat.
Rewards
Fun-a-Log
Most items in the PirateRealm Fun-a-Log must be unlocked before they can be purchased with FunPoints. Listed below are strategies for some of the more difficult unlocks:
- Pirate fork and Scurvy and Sobriety Prevention are easily obtainable by starting with the compass, selling it, and spending the 500 gold in Grub and Grog. The 100 starting gold, along with the 500 gold, is enough to immediately gain 150 of both resources.
- The lucky gold ring is unlocked after returning to Port Beginning with at least 1000 gold. Taking a bloody harpoon curio and hoping to fight at least 3 sea serpents is probably the easiest way to achieve this.
Red Roger
To obtain all of Red Roger's parts, you must fight Red Roger four times. To find him, you'll need a Wide-Eyed or Harquebusier mate to unlock Skull Island, then travel to Cemetery Island, then to Red Roger's Fortress.
Red Roger's red right foot: accessory, +2 FunPoints from sailing adventures when equipped
Red Roger's red left foot: accessory, +1 FunPoints from island combat adventures when equipped
Red Roger's red right hand: 1-handed weapon, +50 physical damage in PirateRealm
Red Roger's red left hand: off-hand, +100% item drops in PirateRealm
After you have all four pieces, equip them before selecting island #3 to sail to Temple Island, where you will find the familiar hatchling Red Roger's skull and unlock his tattoo in the Fun-a-Log.
Maximizing FunPoints
You'll want to obtain fun-increasing gear early. A PirateRealm party hat and Red Roger's red left foot give +1 fun from island combats, and Red Roger's red right foot gives +2 fun from all sailing adventures. A Harquebusier mate also grants +1 fun from island combats.
A slower ship earns more fun, because you can spend more turns per day in PirateRealm. Generally the "correct" choices in sailing adventures give more fun. However, having your ship broken is often better for fun farming, because the repair adventure lengthens your journey by 1, and repairing (with glue) gives 5 fun.
The most fun-earning path appears to be through Red Roger (see section above for instructions), largely because you fight 9 plastic pirates (7 base fun) on the final island. This path requires a Wide-Eyed or Harquebusier mate. If those mates are not available, the second best path is to try to get the recursed compass while traveling to Crab Island, then Isla Gublar, then Glass Jack's Hideout. If you don't get the compass, go to Tiki or Storm Island for your third island, which gives you just slightly fewer fun.
Copied monsters fought outside PirateRealm do not drop fun.
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