Video Game Minion (blob)

Blob minion
Monster ID	unknown
Locations	The GameInformPowerDailyPro Dungeon
Hit Points	75% of Defense
Attack	Scales with player's Moxie
Defense	Scales with player's Muscle
Initiative	0
Meat	None
Phylum	construct
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	body
Drops	2 GIPDP items
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting a blob minion

Blobs come in many varieties -- animate fungus, runoff from magical distillation processes, ectoplasmic clots... the one thing they all have in common is: ew.

or

When dealing with a blob, the most important question is: is it just going to poison you, or is it going to dissolve your flesh to create more of itself? Well, there's really only one way to find out.

or

Isn't it strange that you can fight a blob with physical weapons, when that ought to be basically like trying to stab a mud puddle? Since that is essentially exactly what you're trying to do? Well, I don't imagine you're going to object too strenuously to that little oversight.

Hit Message(s):

It extrudes a pseudopod that bonks you in the leg. Ouch! Ooh! Ouch! Ouch!

It slides up the wall and smacks you right in the hindquarters with a pseudopod. Must be a frat blob. Oof! Oof! Eek! Ooh!

It impersonates a puddle and chews on your toes as you step through it. Eek! Argh! Ow! Eek!

It extrudes a pseudopod and loops it around your legs, making you go all AT-AT. Argh! Ow! Ugh! Ow!

It oozes corrosive goo on you, etching its name on your <arm>. Oof! Argh! Ouch! Ooh!

It oozes corrosive goo on you. Ick, and ow. Ugh! Ooh! Ow! Eek!

It oozes corrosive goo on you. Now you know how batteries left in a toy for ten years feel. Ow! Ooh! Ouch! Ouch!

It oozes corrosive goo on you, leaving a red, stinging welt on your <arm>. Ouch! Argh! Ouch! Ouch!

It slides up the wall and slaps a pseudopod across your face, taking your breath away, and not in a good way. Ooh! Ouch! Eek! Argh!

It slides up the wall and sticks a pseudopod down your throat, then strangles your internal organs. Eek! Ooh! Eek! Eek!

Critical Hit Message:

It extrudes a pseudopod that bonks you in the <arm>. (CRITICAL HIT!) Argh! Eek! Oof! Ouch!

Miss Message(s):

It extrudes a pseudopod, but you tell it to pseudo make you a sandwich.

It flattens on the floor to make a puddle for you to get trapped in, but you're wise to that trick.

It extrudes a pseudopod to wrap around your legs, but you play jump-rope with it.

It drips corrosive goo on you, but you're immune to its corrosive influence.

It drips corrosive goo no you, but you're strong enough for a man and Ph-balanced against corrosive goo.

It drips corrosive goo on you, but you're so base that the acid is neutralized.

It drips corrosive goo at you, but you dodge the drip.

It slides up the wall and launches at your face, but you duck and watch it sail hilariously overhead.

It slides up the wall and tries to go down your throat, but you tell it no monster's taking that route with you.

It extrudes a pseudopod to smack you, but you just give it a high-five.

It extrudes a pseudopod and tries to smack you with it, but is only pseudo-successful.

Fumble Message:

It extrudes a pseudopod to trip you up, but you hop over it. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire... something. [[Data:{{{item}}}]]

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Occurs at The GameInformPowerDailyPro Dungeon.

Notes

• Will drop up to 1 of each of the items selected to drop on the level.
• The name, image, and introduction text of this monster are all randomly selected:
  • Names follow the pattern of: ?
  • Introductions are listed above.
  • Images are randomly any of the following:

GameInformPowerDailyPro Minion Drops

Type Level 1 Level 2 Level 3 Booze tankard of ale bottle of wine shining goblet Food slice of pizza hamburger whole roasted chicken Combat Item vial of holy water round blue bomb fireball Meat Generator huge gold coin dollar-sign bag massive gemstone HP Restorer cartoon heart red potion extra-strength red potion MP Restorer gold star blue potion fancy blue potion Weapon iron dagger steel sword flaming sword Helm green cloth cap iron helmet gold crown

References

• The hit message where the blob minion loops around your legs and makes you go all AT-AT is a reference to the Battle of Hoth in Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back.

• The miss message where you tell the blob minion to "pseudo make you a sandwich" is a reference to the webcomic XKCD (specifically, the installment titled Sandwich).