Maximizing Your Meat Drops

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All players find themselves at some time requiring more Meat. Whether it is to buy that last skill you need, or to save up for that Ultra-Rare you've always wanted, you'll have to be dressed appropriately.

Note that purchasing all the item buffs below is not necessarily cost-efficient, as the resulting drop bonus may not cover the cost of the buffs. It may be more useful for a Meat farmer to read Basic Farming or Advanced Farming instead.

For a complete list of everything which will affect the amount of Meat dropped by monsters, see Meat from Monsters.

Legend
Ultra rares and Raffle House/Radio prizes	Tradable and still obtainable, but rare
Semi-rares and war hero drops
Mr. Store/KoL Con accessible derivatives	Tradable (directly or ingredients or zone access consumable), unlimited generation to those who own source, source no longer obtainable
Mr. Store/KoL Con items and inaccessible derivatives	Tradable, but no longer obtainable
Other limited time content
Clan Dungeon non-tradables	Untradable, but still obtainable
Other non-tradables
Non-tradables from past holidays and world events	Untradable, and no longer obtainable
*	Single-equip restriction, or two-handed/three-handed weapon
^	Equipment disappears at the end of the day or the equipment (or its associated enchantment) has a limited duration

NOTE: Leprechaun-type familiars increase meat drops with weight. The Hobo Monkey acts as a Leprechaun at 1.25 times the weight, and will also occasionally steal an extra 50-100 meat from your opponent during combat.

Familiar	Hat	Back	Shirt	Pants
Weight Leprechaun type Hobo Monkey 1 10.83% 13.08% 5 37.17% 43.58% 10 60.90% 71.44% 15 81.45% 95.73% 20 100.33% 118.16% 25 118.16% 139.42% 30 135.24% 159.83% 35 151.75% 179.61% 40 167.81% 198.88% 45 183.50% 217.74% 50 198.88% 236.26% 60 228.89% 272.45% 70 258.10% 307.74% 80 286.66% 342.32% 90 314.71% 376.32% 100 342.32% 409.83%	Hodgman's porkpie hat 25 Hobo Power crumpled felt fedora 10 lbs Zombo's skullcap 10 lbs (Turtle Tamers only) wad of used tape 30% Crown of Thrones with a Golden Monkey, Hobo Monkey, Knob Goblin Organ Grinder, or Happy Medium 25% Crown of Thrones with a Leprechaun-type 20% The Crown of Ed the Undying with a golden mouse installed 20% Boris's Helm 5 lbs papier-mitre 5 lbs warbear foil hat 5/15 lbs (Turtle Tamers only) plexiglass pith helmet 5 lbs Lens of Hatred 15% ancient turtle shell helmet 10% gold crown 10% Hairpiece On Fire 5 Smithsness Elder Turtle Shell 3 lbs (Turtle Tamers only)	Carpe^ 50% Buddy Bjorn with a Golden Monkey, Hobo Monkey, Knob Goblin Organ Grinder, or Happy Medium 25% Buddy Bjorn with a Leprechaun-type 20% Drapes-You-Regally 20% (Disco Bandits only) teddybear backpack 10% (Disco Bandits only) Cloak of Dire Shadows 10% Buddy Bjorn with a Barrrnacle-type 5 lbs	origami pasties 30% duct tape shirt 20% Sneaky Pete's leather jacket 20% cane-mail shirt 15% conquistador's breastplate 15% Stephen's lab coat 5 lbs Unkillable Skeleton's breastplate 5 lbs (Turtle Tamers only) Ye Olde Navy Fleece 10% BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt 7%	Portable pantogram pants^ 60% and/or 10 lbs, depending on sacrifices Great Wolf's beastly trousers 10 lbs Galapagosian Cuisses 10 lbs (Turtle Tamers only) Pantsgiving 30% Hodgman's lobsterskin pants 25 Hobo Power poodle skirt 25% astral trousers 20% Pair of plants 20% stainless steel slacks 20% Spooky Putty leotard 15% Greaves of the Murk Lord 5 lbs Vicar's Tutu 5 Smithsness
Mainhand	Offhand	Accessory	Familiar equipment	Outfit
scratch 'n' sniff sword/crossbow with 3 UPC stickers^ 75% knife^ 50% Meatcleaver* 35% garbage sticker 30% astral longbow* 30% ice nine^ 30% Coily™* 25% Seeger's Unstoppable Banjo* 23% gnawed-up dog bone 5 lbs iFlail 5 lbs love 5 lbs fish hatchet^ 5 lbs Shakespeare's Sister's Accordion 5 Smithsness 10 with Accordion Appreciation bottle-rocket crossbow 15% meatspout staff* 15% sticky hand whip 15% Meat Tenderizer is Murder, Saucepanic, Hand that Rocks the Ladle, or Frankly Mr. Shank (as the appropriate class) 5 Smithsness Work is a Four Letter Sword, Sheila Take a Crossbow, or Staff of the Headmaster's Victuals 5 Smithsness fish bazooka* 10% Shagadelic Disco Banjo* 10% cyber-mattock* 10% rusted-out shootin' iron 10% acoustic guitarrr* 8% muculent machete 5% world's smallest violin 5% fouet de tortue-dressage 10 lbs (TT only)	Half a Purse 2% per Smithsness Hodgman's garbage sticker 1% per Hobo Power Hodgman's imaginary hamster 1% per Hobo Power knife^ 50% latte lovers member's mug 40% and/or 5 lbs, depending on ingredients garbage sticker 30% ice nine^ 30% silver cow creamer 30% Loathing Legion electric knife 20% Bag o' Tricks 15% bobble-hip hula elf doll 15% bottle-rocket crossbow 15% cup of infinite pencils 15% sticky hand whip 15% Ellsbury's skull 10% loadstone 10% gnawed-up dog bone 5 lbs iFlail 5 lbs love 5 lbs fish hatchet^ 5 lbs old school flying disc 5 lbs Operation Patriot Shield 5 lbs (TT only) Ouija Board, Ouija Board 5 lbs (TT only)	cheap sunglasses 60% (at Barf Mountain only) ring of the Skeleton Lord* 50% LOV Earrings^ 50% Belt of Loathing 10 lbs Hodgman's lucky sock* 50 Hobo Power incredibly dense meat gem 40% Grimacite gauntlets* 30% gold detective badge 30% Grimacite galoshes* 25% Sister Accessory 25% (minimum of +20 Meat) Uncle Hobo's belt* 25% silver detective badge 25% Hodgman's bow tie* 25 Hobo Power droll monocle* 20% Mr. Screege's spectacles* 20% natty blue ascot 20% bronze detective badge 20% bewitching boots 10-20% bitter bowtie 10-20% brazen bracelet 10-20% stinky cheese eye 1-20% Baron von Ratsworth's money clip* 15% evil flaming eyeball pendant* 15% ice skates* 15% long-forgotten necklace 15% plaid pocket square 15% pulled porquoise pendant* 15% Radio KoL Bottle Opener 15% Xiblaxian xeno-detection goggles* 15% plastic detective badge 15% Order of the Silver Wossname* 11% Hand in Glove 5 Smithsness	Li'l pirate costume^ 300% (Trick-or-Treating Tot only) amulet coin^ 50% and 10 lbs lucky Tam O'Shanter 50% lucky Tam O'Shatner 50% Mayflower bouquet 0-40% and 5 lbs astral pet sweater 10 lbs sugar shield 10 lbs Most familiar specific equipment 5 lbs lead necklace 3 lbs	Hodgman's Regal Frippery 25 Hobo Power
Effects and buffs	Familiar weight Effects and Buffs	Passive skills, non-buff skills and others
Synthesis: Greed 300% (using Sweet Synthesis skill) How to Scam Tourists 300% (at Barf Mountain only) Buy! Sell! Buy! Sell! 2-200% Covetin' Drunk 200% Frosty 200% Sinuses For Miles 200% Let's Go Shopping! 150% Preternatural Greed 100% Kicked in the Sinuses 100% Low on the Hog 100% Trufflin' 100% Cravin' for a Ravin' 100% Sour Softshoe 2-100% Amorous Avarice 0-100% Carrion' On 60% meat.enh 60% Polka Face 5-55% Black Tongue 50% and 5 lbs (does not stack with other tongues) Merry Smithsness 25 Smithsness Big Meat Big Prizes 50% Cowlick 50% (Avatar of Sneaky Pete only) Egg-stortionary Tactics 50% Eyes Wide Propped 50% Human-Constellation Hybrid 50% Peppermint Twisted 50% Polka of Plenty 50% Red Tongue 50% (does not stack with other tongues) Song of Fortune 50% (Avatar of Boris only) The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder 50% Turkey-Ambitious 50% Dances with Tweedles 40% The Grass... Is Blue... 40% Wasabi Sinuses 40% Sweet Heart 2-40% (does not stack with other love songs) Winklered 40% Can't Be a Chooser 30% Your Cupcake Senses Are Tingling 30% Flashing Eyes 30% Greedy Resolve 30% Smithsness Presence 10 Smithsness Smithsness Cheer 10 Smithsness Smithsness Dinner 10 Smithsness Badger Underfoot 20% Blackberry Politeness 20% Heart of Pink 20% Holiday Bliss 20% Human-Humanoid Hybrid 20% Make Meat FA$T! 20% Sticky Fingers 20% Swimming with Sharks 20% Things Man Was Not Meant to Eat 20% Tingling Feeling 20% Material Witness 10% Cranberry Cordiality 10% Leo Rising 10% So You Can Work More... 10% Hobonic 5 Hobo Power Video... Games? 5%, 5 pounds, 5 Smithsness, 5 Hobo Power	She Ate Too Much Candy 1-25 lbs Meteor Showered 20 lbs Puzzle Champ 5-20 lbs Robot Friends 20 lbs Smart Drunk 20 lbs All Is Forgiven 10 lbs Bureaucratized 10 lbs Chorale of Companionship 10 lbs Crocodile Tear 10 lbs (Underwater only) Cold Hearted 1-10 lbs (does not stack with other love songs) Down With Chow 10 lbs Healthy Green Glow 10 lbs Hip to the Jive 10 lbs Human-Fish Hybrid 10 lbs Joy 10 lbs Open Heart Surgery 10 lbs Pajama Party 10 lbs Spirit of Galactic Unity 10 lbs Thanksgetting 10 lbs The Inquisitor's Unknown Effect 10 lbs Unbarking Dogs 10 lbs Whole Latte Love 10 lbs A Girl Named Sue 5 lbs Billiards Belligerence 5 lbs Black Tongue 5 lbs (does not stack with other tongues) Blue Swayed 1-5 lbs Boxing Day Glow 5 lbs ChibiChanged™ 5 lbs Cute Vision 5 lbs Empathy 5 lbs familiar.enq 5 lbs Greased-Up Familiar 5 lbs (Underwater only) Green Tongue 5 lbs (does not stack with other tongues) Heavy Petting 5 lbs Human-Machine Hybrid 5 lbs Kindly Resolve 5 lbs Loyal Tea 5 lbs Man's Worst Enemy 5 lbs Optimist Primal 5 lbs Over-Familiar With Dactyls 5 lbs Shrimpin' Ain't Easy 5 lbs Spookyravin' 5 lbs Squirming Like a Toad 5 lbs Sugar-Frosted Pet Guts 5 lbs Sweet Incentive 5 lbs Toothy Grin 5 lbs Turkey-Friendly 5 lbs Video... Games? 5 lbs Warm Shoulders 5 lbs Work For Hours a Week 5 lbs You Can Really Taste the Dormouse 5 lbs Phairly Pheromonal 4 lbs Beastly Flavor 3 lbs Bestial Sympathy 3 lbs Happy Salamander 3 lbs Heart of Green 3 lbs Souper Vengeful 3 lbs (Turtle Tamers only) Thanksgot 2 lbs	Rave Nirvana 50% VYKEA Couch 10-50% Lasagmbie 20-40% (PM only) Nimble Fingers 20% The Wombat 20% Base familiar weight 1-20 lbs Expert Panhandling (w/ a saucepan equipped) 15% Expert Panhandling (w/o a saucepan equipped) 10% Disco Leer 10% Thief Among the Honorable 10% Gnefarious Pickpocketing 10% Thrift and Grift 10% Pasta Eyeball 10% (non-PM only) Amphibian Sympathy 5 lbs Leash of Linguini 5 lbs

Notes

• The bewitching boots, bitter bowtie and brazen bracelet become more effective if you wear them together. See their item pages for details.
• Wearing n pieces of Brimstone equipment gives +2ⁿ% meat drops.
• Wearing n pieces of the Clothing of Loathing also gives +2ⁿ% meat drops.
• Being underwater gives you an inherent penalty to item- and meat-drops.
• Wearers of Hodgman's Regal Frippery may summon a hobo underling five times per day, then ask it to tell them a joke for 100% meat gains. Owners of a dinged-up triangle can do this too (at an effective cost of at least eleven turns--10 hobo nickels and one turn at The Hobo Marketplace).
• Smithsness can currently be raised to a maximum of 90 points (giving a maximum meat drop bonus of 180% on Half a Purse).
• Hobo Power can currently be raised to a maximum of 170 points (giving a maximum meat drop bonus of 170% on Hodgman offhand items).
• Human-Constellation Hybrid and Human-Humanoid Hybrid are available as potion effects, or as intrinsic effects (the latter requires having a Little Geneticist DNA-Splicing Lab installed in Your Workshed). The potion and the intrinsic do not stack.

Available under Bad Moon

• Greed (+50%) (only if familiars and skills are not recalled)
• Hella Smooth (+40%)
• Braaains (+50%)
• Braaaaaains (+200%)

Farming for Meat with a NPZR

A NPZR has an 11% chance to give [(6 × weight) + 10] meat, per combat round, in the first 10 rounds of any fight.
It also has an 11% chance to deal (weight × 3/2) damage, per combat round.

The 10 round cap has effectively ended the NPZR's reign as meat-farming familiar of choice. The following information is left as an archive of past functionality, rather than a useful modern guide.

Example - Farming the Castle in the Sky

Possibly, the best area for NPZR meat farming would be the The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky, because the base meat drop is added to the meat given by the NPZR. Of course, the non-combat adventures decrease the efficiency, so increasing combat frequency is highly recommended.

All monsters at the Castle have 150 HP. Meat drop is 135-194 (avg: ~150) per monster. So, let's compare a 50-lb NPZR with a 50-lb Leprechaun. In 10 rounds of combat at 11% Chance of meat drop you get a meat drop 1.1 times/adventure. A full weight Stocking Mimic (assuming it's just a really heavy cocoabo) you have a 1/12 chance of getting meat meaning you get 5/6 of a drop per fight. If you do all the math, you will get:

• 50-lb leprechaun = 448.35 meat (198.9% extra meat plus 150 from the end of combat)

• 50-lb NPZR = 491 meat/adventure (310/drop which averages 341 meat plus the 150 you get from the end of combat)

• 130-lb Stocking Mimic (100-lb plus the 30 bonus the others got) = 727 meat/adventure (693.2 per drop factoring in Happy Holidays, averaging out to 578 per actual fight, plus 150 from the end of combat)

Thus, a Stocking Mimic is better than a NPZR, which is better than a leprechaun at the castle.

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