Monster Compendium (F to M)

This is a nearly complete alphabetized listing of the monsters in the Kingdom. Each of the critters' names links to the spoilertastic description of an encounter with them. These are the monsters alphabetically from F to M.

Fallen Archfiend  Habitat: The Dark Heart of the Woods and Pandamonium Slums  Item Drops: demon skin, evil golden arch, infernal insoles, pink slime  Quest Items: heavy-duty bendy straw

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Family Jewels]] The Family Jewels  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

fancy bath slug  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

Feeling That You're Being Watched  Habitat: An Incredibly Strange Place (Mediocre Trip)  Item Drops: pink-frosted astral cupcake

Felonia, Queen of the Spooky Gravy Fairies  Habitat: The Spooky Gravy Burrow: On the Verge of a Dirge  Item Drops: spooky bicycle chain, spooky cosmetics bag, miniature carton of clove cigarettes (if Spooky Gravy Fairy is active familiar)

Ferocious bugbear  Habitat: The Haiku Dungeon  Item Drops: bugbear bungguard, bugbear beanie

Fickle Finger of F8  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

fiendish can of asparagus  Habitat: The Haunted Pantry, The Haunted Pantry (Retired)  Item Drops: asparagus knife, razor-sharp can lid, stalk of asparagus  Bounty: shredded can label

fiendish zombie can of asparagus  Habitat: Market Square, 28 Days Later  Item Drops: asparagus knife, razor-sharp can lid, stalk of asparagus, zombie pineal gland

figure-skating duck  Habitat: The Pond, McMillicancuddy's Farm (Post-War)  Item Drops: duct tape, frozen feather

filthworm royal guard  Habitat: The Guards' Chamber  Item Drops: None  Quest Items: filthworm royal guard scent gland

filthworm drone  Habitat: The Feeding Chamber  Item Drops: None  Quest Items: filthworm drone scent gland

filthy hippy  Habitat: The Hippy Camp  Item Drops: decorative fountain, double-barreled sling, filthy corduroys, filthy knitted dread sack, patchouli incense stick, reodorant, tambourine bells  Bounty: greasy dreadlock  Quest Items: Spanish fly

filthy hippy jewelry maker  Habitat: The Hippy Camp  Item Drops: beach glass bead, clay peace-sign bead, filthy corduroys, filthy knitted dread sack, hemp string, phat turquoise bead, patchouli incense stick, reodorant, double-barreled sling  Bounty: greasy dreadlock  Quest Items: Spanish fly

filthy hippy Vegan chef  Habitat: The Hippy Camp  Item Drops: double-barreled sling, filthy corduroys, filthy knitted dread sack, filthy pestle, patchouli incense stick, reodorant, tambourine bells, wad of tofu  Bounty: greasy dreadlock  Quest Items: Spanish fly

fire-breathing duck  Habitat: The Back 40, McMillicancuddy's Farm (Post-War)  Item Drops: duct tape, flaming feather

fisherfish  Habitat: The Marinara Trench  Item Drops: glowing esca, halibut, rough fish scale

flame-broiled meat blob  Habitat: The Haunted Pantry, The Haunted Pantry (Retired)  Item Drops: meat paste, meat paste, meat paste

Flaming Samurai  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

Flaming Troll  Habitat: The Valley of Rof L'm Fao  Item Drops: flaming talons, Trollhouse cookies

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Flange]] The Flange  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

flint-scraping cave elf  Habitat: Simple Tool-Making Cave  Item Drops: rock, stick, stick  Quest Items: big leaf

floating platter of hors d'oeuvres  Habitat: The Haunted Ballroom  Item Drops: dehydrated caviar, desiccated apricot, flute of flat champagne, hors d'oeuvre tray

Flock of Stab-bats  Habitat: Inside the Palindome, The Palindome (OLD), The Palindome (Retired)  Item Drops: bat wing, batblade, batgut

fluffy bunny  Habitat: The Dire Warren  Item Drops: bunny liver

forest spirit  Habitat: Outskirts of Camp Logging Camp  Item Drops: forest tears

Frat Warrior drill sergeant  Habitat: Orcish Frat House (Verge of War) (in Filthy Hippy Disguise or War Hippy Fatigues)  Item Drops: beer helmet, distressed denim pants, bejeweled pledge pin, flask flops

frog  Habitat: after casting CLEESH in combat  Item Drops: squashed frog

Frosty  Habitat: Exposure Esplanade: Bumpity Bump Bump  Item Drops: Benetton's Medley of Diversity, Evil Snowman Heart, Frosty's arm, Frosty's carrot, Frosty's frosty mug, Frosty's iceball, Frosty's nailbat, Frosty's old silk hat, Frosty's snowball sack

frozen duck  Habitat: The Pond, McMillicancuddy's Farm (Post-War)  Item Drops: duct tape, frozen feather

Fruit Golem  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 1  Item Drops: cherry, lime, orange; grapefruit (when attacking with a certain message)

funk sole brother  Habitat: The Briny Deeps  Item Drops: dull fish scale, slick fish meat

Furry Giant  Habitat: The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky (Basement), The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky (Retired)  Item Drops: disturbing fanfic, furry fur, wolf mask

G imp  Habitat: The Dark Elbow of the Woods, The Dark Heart of the Woods and Pandamonium Slums  Item Drops: hot wing, Imp Ale, leather mask, Vitamin G pill

gang of hobo muggers  Habitat: Hobopolis Town Square: The Hobo Marketplace  Item Drops: None

ganger  Habitat: The Briniest Deepests  Item Drops: dull fish scale, ganger bandana, temporary teardrop tattoo

gargantulihc  Habitat: The Defiled Niche  Item Drops: lihc eye, lihc eye, lihc face

Gathering of Angels?  Habitat: An Incredibly Strange Place (Great Trip)  Item Drops: orange-frosted astral cupcake

gaudy pirate  Habitat: Belowdecks  Item Drops: enormous hoop earring, costume sword, gold lamé pants

gaunt ghuol  Habitat: The Defiled Cranny, The VERY Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: ghuol ears, ghuol egg, dieting pill

gelatinous cube  Habitat: The Haiku Dungeon  Item Drops: Orcish meat locker, rusty metal ring, rusty metal shaft

generic duck  Habitat: The Barn  Item Drops: None

ghastly organist  Habitat: The Haunted Ballroom: Curtains  Item Drops: opera mask

ghost miner  Habitat: The Knob Shaft  Item Drops: bubblewrap ore, bubblewrap ore, cardboard ore, cardboard ore, styrofoam ore, styrofoam ore

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=the Ghost of Fernswarthy's n great-grandfather]] the Ghost of Fernswarthy's n great-grandfather  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

ghostly pickle factory worker  Habitat: The Spectral Pickle Factory  Item Drops: ghost cucumber, ghost cucumber

ghuol  Habitat: The Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: ghuol ears, ghuol egg

giant bee  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

Giant Desktop Globe  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

giant fried egg  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

giant giant giant centipede  Habitat: The Arid, Extra-Dry Desert  Item Drops: centipede eggs, handful of sand, handful of sand

giant giant moth  Habitat: The Daily Dungeon  Item Drops: giant giant moth dust

giant pair of tweezers  Habitat: Fernswarthy's Tower (Retired)  Item Drops: None

giant sandworm  Habitat: using a drum machine without worm-riding hooks in inventory  Item Drops: spices, spices, spices, spice melange

giant skeelton  Habitat: The Defiled Nook  Item Drops: skeleton bone, skeleton bone, skeleton bone

giant squid  Habitat: The Marinara Trench  Item Drops: ink bladder, inky squid sauce

giant zombie goldfish  Habitat: A Maze of Sewer Tunnels  Item Drops: decaying goldfish liver, sewer nuggets, sewer nuggets

gift-wrapping vampire  Habitat: The Spooky Fright Factory  Item Drops: evil googly eye, spooky felt, spooky length of string, spooky stuffing, spooky toy wheel, spooky wooden block  Quest Items: spooky frank

Glass of Orange Juice  Habitat: The Battlefield (Frat Warrior Fatigues)  Item Drops: bullet-proof corduroys, Lockenstock™ sandals, orange peel hat, round purple sunglasses, green clay bead

gluttonous ghuol  Habitat: The Defiled Cranny, The VERY Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: ghuol ears, ghuol egg, ghuol guolash, huge spoon

gnarly gnome  Habitat: Thugnderdome  Item Drops: clockwork key, clockwork key, flange

gnasty gnome  Habitat: Thugnderdome  Item Drops: clockwork key, clockwork key, flange

gnefarious gnome  Habitat: Thugnderdome  Item Drops: cog, flange, sprocket

Gnollish Bodybuilder  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Gym, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: enchanted barbell, gnoll lips, gnoll teeth

Gnollish Crossdresser  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Gym, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: frilly shirt, frilly skirt, gnoll teeth, maiden wig

Gnollish Flyslayer  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Restroom, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: gnoll lips, gnoll teeth, Gnollish flyswatter

Gnollish Gearhead  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Garage, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: gnoll lips, Gnollish toolbox, folder (Knight Writer)  Bounty: oily rag

Gnollish Piebaker  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Bakery, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: Gnollish pie server, Gnollish pie tin, skewer, wad of dough

Gnollish Plungermaster  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Restroom, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: gnoll lips, gnoll teeth, Gnollish plunger  Bounty: broken plunger handle

Gnollish Sorceress  Habitat: Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: gnoll lips, gnoll teeth

Gnollish Tirejuggler  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Garage, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: gnoll lips, gnoll teeth, tires

Gnollish War Chef  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Bakery, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: Gnollish slotted spoon, Knoll mushroom, Knoll mushroom, skewer

Gnomester Blomester  Habitat: Thugnderdome  Item Drops: cog, flange, spring

gnu jack gnome  Habitat: Thugnderdome  Item Drops: flange, spring, sprocket

golden ring  Habitat: A Sinister Dodecahedron  Item Drops: golden ring

Goomba  Habitat: The Fungus Plains, 8-Bit Realm (Retired)  Item Drops: black pixel, red pixel, white pixel

goose a-laying  Habitat: A Sinister Dodecahedron  Item Drops: robotronic egg, robotronic egg

Goth Giant  Habitat: The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky (Top Floor), The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky (Retired)  Item Drops: awful poetry journal, thin black candle, Warm Subject gift certificate

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=Gorgolok, the Infernal Seal]] Gorgolok, the Infernal Seal  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Grass Elemental  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 2  Item Drops: leaf of grass, folder (Ex-Files)

grassy pirate  Habitat: Belowdecks  Item Drops: grassy cutlass

grave rober  Habitat: The Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: coffin lid, dead guy's watch, grave robbing shovel

grave rober zmobie  Habitat: The Defiled Alcove, The VERY Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: coffin lid, dead guy's watch, loose teeth, rusty grave robbing shovel

greasy duck  Habitat: The Back 40, McMillicancuddy's Farm (Post-War)  Item Drops: duct tape, flirtatious feather

Green Ops Soldier  Habitat: The Battlefield (Frat Warrior Fatigues)  Item Drops: communications windchimes, gas balloon, gas balloon, green smoke bomb, henna face paint, round green sunglasses, green clay bead

gritty pirate  Habitat: Belowdecks  Item Drops: true grit, keel-haulin' knife

groovy pirate  Habitat: Belowdecks  Item Drops: buoybottoms

Grumpy, the Reindeer  Habitat: Crimbo Town Toy Factory (2005, with Sign)  Item Drops: None

grungy pirate  Habitat: Belowdecks  Item Drops: acoustic guitarrr, grungy bandana, grungy flannel shirt

Guard Bugbear  Habitat: The Degrassi Knoll Bakery, The Degrassi Knoll Restroom, The Degrassi Knoll Garage, Degrassi Knoll (Retired)  Item Drops: bugbear beanie, bugbear bungguard

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Guy Made Of Bees]] The Guy Made Of Bees  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

guy with a pitchfork, and his wife  Habitat: The Haunted Gallery  Item Drops: pitchfork

handsome mariachi  Habitat: South of The Border  Item Drops: bottle of tequila, chorizo taco, handsomeness potion

Happy, the Reindeer  Habitat: Crimbo Town Toy Factory (2005, with Sign)  Item Drops: None

Heavy Kegtank  Habitat: The Battlefield (War Hippy Fatigues)  Item Drops: meat engine, PADL Phone, sake bomb, sake bomb

Hellion  Habitat: The Dark Neck of the Woods, Pandamonium Slums  Item Drops: hellion cube  Pickpocket: unstable quark

Higher Plane Serpents  Habitat: An Incredibly Strange Place (Great Trip)  Item Drops: pink-frosted astral cupcake

hockey elemental  Habitat: Camp Logging Camp (ultra-rarely)  Item Drops: hockey stick of furious angry rage

Hodgman, The Hoboverlord  Habitat: Hobopolis Town Square: Enter The Hoboverlord  Item Drops: hobo fortress blueprints, Hodgman's bow tie, Hodgman's porkpie hat, Hodgman's lobsterskin pants, stuffed Hodgman, Hodgman's almanac, Hodgman's lucky sock, Hodgman's metal detector, Hodgman's blanket, Hodgman's varcolac paw, Hodgman's harmonica, Hodgman's garbage sticker, Hodgman's cane, Hodgman's disgusting technicolor overcoat, Hodgman's whackin' stick, Hodgman's imaginary hamster, Hodgman's journal 1: The Lean Times, Hodgman's journal 2: Entrepreneurythmics, Hodgman's journal 3: Pumping Tin, Hodgman's journal 4: View From The Big Top, Hodgman's skivvies, tin cup of mulligan stew

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Honey Pot]] The Honey Pot  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Hooded Warrior]] The Hooded Warrior  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Hot hobo  Habitat: Burnbarrel Blvd.  Item Drops: bed of coals, flamin' bindle, hobo nickel, Kissin' Cousins, Tales from the Fireside

huge ghuol  Habitat: The Defiled Cranny  Item Drops: ghuol ears, ghuol egg

hulking construct  Habitat: A Shimmering Portal  Item Drops: El Vibrato punchcard (88 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (97 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (104 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (115 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (129 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (142 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (165 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (176 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (182 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (213 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (216 holes)

hung-over half-orc hobo  Habitat: The Sleazy Back Alley, The Sleazy Back Alley (Retired)  Item Drops: dirty hobo gloves, Mad Train wine, moxie weed  Bounty: hobo gristle  Pickpocket: Boozehounds Anonymous token

hunter-gatherer cave elf  Habitat: Simple Tool-Making Cave  Item Drops: tooth, tooth  Quest Items: big leaf

Hypnotist of Hey Deze  Habitat: Pandamonium Slums (ultra-rarely)  Item Drops: hypnodisk

Ice Cube  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

Iiti Kitty  Habitat: The Upper Chamber  Item Drops: ancient Magi-Wipes, ancient vinyl coin purse, Iiti Kitty phone charm, leathery cat skin, mummy wrapping, unidentified jerky

industrious construct  Habitat: A Shimmering Portal  Item Drops: El Vibrato punchcard (88 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (129 holes)

infinite meat bug  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Treasury (ultra-rarely)  Item Drops: incredibly dense meat gem

irate mariachi  Habitat: South of The Border  Item Drops: bottle of tequila, half-sized guitar, irate sombrero, mariachi G-string

Irritating Series of Random Encounters  Habitat: The Penultimate Fantasy Airship  Item Drops: cocoa eggshell fragment, soft green echo eyedrop antidote, tiny house

jamfish  Habitat: Madness Reef  Item Drops: jamfish jam, jellyfish gel, seaweed, jam band

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Junk]] The Junk  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Keese  Habitat: Hero's Field, 8-Bit Realm (Retired)  Item Drops: blue pixel, blue pixel, blue pixel

Killer Festive Arc-Welding Elfbot  Habitat: The Crimborg Collective Factory  Item Drops: capacitor relay, carbon nanotube frame, Feynman gate, high-resistance ultrapolymer plating, ion grid, logic synthesizer  Quest Items: flask of peppermint oil

Killer Festive Decal-Applying Elfbot  Habitat: The Crimborg Collective Factory  Item Drops: capacitor relay, carbon nanotube frame, Feynman gate, high-resistance ultrapolymer plating, ion grid, logic synthesizer  Quest Items: flask of peppermint oil

Killer Festive Laser-Calibrating Elfbot  Habitat: The Crimborg Collective Factory  Item Drops: capacitor relay, carbon nanotube frame, Feynman gate, high-resistance ultrapolymer plating, ion grid, logic synthesizer  Quest Items: flask of peppermint oil

Killer Festive Weapons-Assembly Elfbot  Habitat: The Crimborg Collective Factory  Item Drops: capacitor relay, carbon nanotube frame, Feynman gate, high-resistance ultrapolymer plating, ion grid, logic synthesizer  Quest Items: flask of peppermint oil

killing bird  Habitat: A Sinister Dodecahedron  Item Drops: killing feather, killing feather

knight  Habitat: The Haunted Gallery: Out in the Garden  Item Drops: serpentine sword, snake shield

knight  Habitat: The Haunted Gallery: Out in the Garden  Item Drops: lupine sword, snarling wolf shield

Knight in White Satin  Habitat: Whitey's Grove  Item Drops: white page, white satin pants, white sword, white satin shield  Bounty: white lint

Knob Goblin Assistant Chef  Habitat: Outskirts of Cobb's Knob, The Haunted Pantry: Trespasser  Item Drops: chef's hat, Knob Goblin pants, Knob Goblin tongs, concentrated cooking

Knob Goblin Barbecue Team  Habitat: Outskirts of Cobb's Knob  Item Drops: bowl of cottage cheese, Knob Goblin pants, Knob Goblin tongs  Bounty: bloodstained briquette  Pickpocket: Colon Annihilation Hot Sauce

Knob Goblin Bean Counter  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Treasury  Item Drops: hill of beans, Knob Goblin visor, meat stack, stolen office supplies  Bounty: bundle of receipts

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=Knob Goblin Chef]] Knob Goblin Chef  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Knob Goblin Elite Guard Captain  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Barracks (While Lucky!)  Item Drops: Knob Goblin elite helm, Knob Goblin elite pants, Knob Goblin elite polearm

Knob Goblin Elite Guardsman  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Treasury (Retired), Cobb's Knob Harem (Retired)  Item Drops: knob bugle, Knob Goblin elite helm, Knob Goblin elite pants, Knob Goblin elite polearm, Knob Goblin elite shirt

Knob Goblin Embezzler  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Treasury (While Lucky!)  Item Drops: Knob Goblin visor, meat stack, meat stack, meat stack, meat stack  Bounty: bundle of receipts

Knob Goblin Harem Girl  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Harem  Item Drops: disease, finger cymbals, harem girl t-shirt, Knob Goblin harem pants, Knob Goblin harem veil

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Knob Goblin King]] The Knob Goblin King  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Knob Goblin Mad Scientist  Habitat: Knob Goblin Laboratory  Item Drops: Knob Goblin love potion, Knob Goblin seltzer, Knob Goblin steroids  Bounty: broken petri dish

Knob Goblin Master Chef  Habitat: Cobb's Knob Kitchens  Item Drops: dry noodles, Knob Goblin spatula, Knob mushroom, spices

Knob Goblin poseur  Habitat: The Haiku Dungeon  Item Drops: dope gangsta bling-bling, out-of-tune biwa, terrible poem

knight  Habitat: The Haunted Gallery: Out in the Garden  Item Drops: lupine sword, snarling wolf shield

Knob Goblin Very Mad Scientist  Habitat: Knob Goblin Laboratory  Item Drops: bunch of square grapes, Knob Goblin melon baller, Knob Goblin seltzer, Knob Goblin superseltzer, scrumptious reagent  Quest Items: Cobb's Knob Menagerie key, Subject 37 file  Pickpocket: smudged alchemical recipe

Knott Slanding  Habitat: The Icy Peak (ultra-rarely)  Item Drops: Dallas Dynasty Falcon Crest shield

Knott Yeti  Habitat: The Icy Peak  Item Drops: yeti fur

Koopa Troopa  Habitat: The Fungus Plains‎, 8-Bit Realm (Retired)  Item Drops: black pixel, green pixel, white pixel

Kubla Khan  Habitat: The Stately Pleasure Dome  Item Drops: None

L imp  Habitat: The Dark Elbow of the Woods and Pandamonium Slums  Item Drops: cast, flaming crutch, Imp Ale

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=La Novia Cadáver]] La Novia Cadáver  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=La Persona Inocente Cadáver]] La Persona Inocente Cadáver  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

Lamz0r N00b  Habitat: The Valley of Rof L'm Fao  Item Drops: 33398 scroll, draggin' ball hat, plastic guitar  Pickpocket: Nardz energy beverage

large kobold  Habitat: The Dungeons of Doom  Item Drops: ring of aggravate monster, small box  Bounty: worthless piece of yellow glass

larval filthworm  Habitat: The Hatching Chamber  Item Drops: None  Quest Items: filthworm hatchling scent gland

laser lancing  Habitat: A Sinister Dodecahedron  Item Drops: unstable laser battery, unstable laser battery

lemon-in-the-box  Habitat: The "Fun" House  Item Drops: box, lemon

Lesser Fruit Golem  Habitat: Tower Ruins  Item Drops: grapefruit, grapes, lemon, orange, strawberry

lihc  Habitat: The Unquiet Garves  Item Drops: lihc eye

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Little Man in the Canoe]] The Little Man in the Canoe  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

lobsterfrogman  Habitat: Sonofa Beach  Item Drops: None  Quest Items: barrel of gunpowder

lonely construct  Habitat: A Shimmering Portal  Item Drops: El Vibrato punchcard (182 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (213 holes)

Lord Spookyraven  Habitat: Summoning Chamber  Item Drops: Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet  Quest Items: Eye of Ed

lumberjack supervisor  Habitat: Camp Logging Camp  Item Drops: balaclava, balaclava baklava

lumberjill  Habitat: Camp Logging Camp  Item Drops: Blatantly Canadian, maple syrup, supportive bra

lumberjuan  Habitat: Camp Logging Camp  Item Drops: leaflet, los chinos, wooden axe

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=Lumpy, the Sinister Sauceblob]] Lumpy, the Sinister Sauceblob  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

mad bugbears  Habitat: The Bugbear Pen  Item Drops: None

magic dragonfish  Habitat: Madness Reef  Item Drops: dragonfish caviar, rough fish scale, seaweed

MagiMechTech MechaMech  Habitat: The Penultimate Fantasy Airship  Item Drops: glowing red eye, metallic A, oversized pizza cutter, photoprotoneutron torpedo, magilaser blastercannon  Bounty: burned-out arcanodiode

malevolent crop circle  Habitat: The Sorceress' Tower (The Stairs)  Item Drops: None

malevolent hair clog  Habitat: The Haunted Bathroom  Item Drops: gob of wet hair

Malevolent Tofurkey  Habitat: Appears about every 30 adventures on Feast of Boris  Item Drops: tofurkey nugget, packet of tofurkey gravy (below level 5); tofurkey gravy, tofurkey leg (level 5 and above)

The Man  Habitat: The Orcish Frat House (Wartime)  Item Drops: really dense meat stack

man-eating plant  Habitat: The Haunted Conservatory  Item Drops: None

mariachi calavera  Habitat: South of The Border  Item Drops: bottle of tequila, marzipan skull  Bounty: callused fingerbone  Pickpocket: calavera concertina

master of ceremonies  Habitat: The Rogue Windmill  Item Drops: escargotsicle

The Master Of Thieves  Habitat: The Dungeons of Doom (ultra-rarely)  Item Drops: Platinum Yendorian Express Card

mayonnaise wasp  Habitat: The Daily Dungeon  Item Drops: glob of spoiled mayo

me4t begZ0r  Habitat: The Valley of Rof L'm Fao  Item Drops: meat vortex

mean drunk duck  Habitat: The Shady Thicket, McMillicancuddy's Farm (Post-War)  Item Drops: bottle of tequila, bottle of vodka, bottle of whiskey, duct tape

Mer-kin diver  Habitat: The Marinara Trench  Item Drops: Mer-kin foodbucket, Mer-kin hookspear, Mer-kin pressureglobe, Mer-kin thingpouch

Mer-kin scavenger  Habitat: The Wreck of the Edgar Fitzsimmons  Item Drops: Mer-kin hookspear, Mer-kin takebag, Mer-kin thingpouch

migratory pirate  Habitat: every 25-35 adventures on Talk Like a Pirate Day from IV onwards  Item Drops: black spot, can of Binarrrca

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=mimic (Barrel)]] mimic (Barrel)  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

mimic  Habitat: The Dungeons of Doom: Ouch! You bump into a door!  Item Drops: None  Quest Items: dead mimic

mind flayer  Habitat: The Dungeons of Doom  Item Drops: cornuthaum, large box, mind flayer corpse

mine crab  Habitat: The Wreck of the Edgar Fitzsimmons  Item Drops: live nautical mine

Mob Penguin goon  Habitat: Old Crimbo Town Toy Factory  Item Drops: penguin thesaurus

Mob Penguin enforcer  Habitat: Old Crimbo Town Toy Factory  Item Drops: patent leather shoes

Mob Penguin hitpenguin  Habitat: Old Crimbo Town Toy Factory  Item Drops: canteen of wine, depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick

Mob Penguin Pasta Chef  Habitat: The Icy Peak in The Recent Past  Item Drops: delicious noodles, iron pasta spoon, scroll of pasta summoning

Mob Penguin psychopath  Habitat: Old Crimbo Town Toy Factory  Item Drops: knuckle sandwich, psycho sweater

Mob Penguin racketeer  Habitat: Old Crimbo Town Toy Factory  Item Drops: gray bow tie

Mob Penguin Smasher  Habitat: The Grim Grimacite Site  Item Drops: chunk of depleted Grimacite, kneecapping stick, penguin skin

Mob Penguin Smith  Habitat: The Grim Grimacite Site  Item Drops: chunk of depleted Grimacite, iron pasta spoon, scroll of pasta summoning

Mob Penguin Soprano  Habitat: The Icy Peak in The Recent Past  Item Drops: mafia aria, Mob Penguin cellular phone, support cummerbund

Mob Penguin Supervisor  Habitat: The Grim Grimacite Site  Item Drops: chunk of depleted Grimacite, mafia aria, Mob Penguin cellular phone, support cummerbund

Mob Penguin Thug  Habitat: The Icy Peak in The Recent Past  Item Drops: kneecapping stick, penguin skin

Mobile Armored Sweat Lodge  Habitat: The Battlefield (Frat Warrior Fatigues)  Item Drops: communications windchimes, didgeridooka, gas balloon

Monty Basingstoke-Pratt, IV  Habitat: The Battlefield (War Hippy Fatigues)  Item Drops: bejeweled pledge pin, distressed denim pants, kick-ass kicks, natty blue ascot, white class ring

[[File:{{{img}}}|link=The Muff]] The Muff  Habitat: Unknown  Item Drops: None

mutant circuit-soldering elf  Habitat: The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory  Item Drops: elven moonshine, miniature antlers

mutant cookie-baking elf  Habitat: The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory  Item Drops: festive holiday hat

mutant doll-dressing elf  Habitat: The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory  Item Drops: cheap elven gloves

mutant gift-wrapping elf  Habitat: The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory  Item Drops: elven socks

mutant gila monster  Habitat: Appears about every 30 adventures on Halloween XX  Item Drops: beholed bedsheet, invisible bag, witch hat

mutant rattlesnake  Habitat: Appears about every 30 adventures on Halloween XX  Item Drops: beholed bedsheet, invisible bag, witch hat

mutant saguaro  Habitat: Appears about every 30 adventures on Halloween XX  Item Drops: beholed bedsheet, invisible bag, witch hat

mutant whistle-carving elf  Habitat: The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory  Item Drops: elven limbos gingerbread, elven whittling knife