Weapons: Difference between revisions

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imported>Foggy
okay, part 1 done
imported>Zitim
Added petrified wood war pike.
 
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{{NeedsContent|There are a whopping 139 weapons missing from this list.}}
{{RETURNTO Mechanics}}
{{RETURNTO Mechanics}}


Weapons are things adventurers use to [[Weapon Damage|hurt]] monsters, rocks, grass, small children, air, each other, and whatever else happens to get in their line of fire.
Weapons are things adventurers use to [[Weapon Damage|hurt]] monsters, rocks, grass, small children, air, each other, and whatever else happens to get in their line of fire.


As a general rule, weapons having a Moxie requirement are [[ranged weapons]], using Moxie to calculate [[Hit Chance]], and weapons having a Muscle requirement are [[melee weapons]], using Muscle to calculate hit chance. Weapons with a Mysticality requirement are [[mysticality weapons]], which also use Muscle to calculate hit chance, but generally give [[Bonus Spell Damage]].
As a general rule:
*Weapons having a Moxie requirement are [[ranged weapons]] and use Moxie to calculate [[Hit Chance]].
*Weapons having a Muscle requirement are [[melee weapons]] and use Muscle to calculate hit chance.
*Weapons having a Mysticality requirement are [[mysticality weapons]] and use Muscle to calculate hit chance, but generally give [[Bonus Spell Damage]].


In terms of weapon types, all weapons of the following types are ranged:
In terms of weapon types, all weapons of the following types are ranged:
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*yoyo
*yoyo


[[Chefstaves]], [[utensils]], and [[saucepan]]s are mysticality weapons, as is the special [[Periodical Paintbrush]]. All other items are generally [[melee weapons]], although there are exceptions; for example, the [[lucky ball-and-chain]] is a ranged flail, the [[can of maces]] is a ranged [[club]], and the [[heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr]] is a ranged axe.
[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]], [[:Category:Utensils|utensils]], and [[saucepan]]s are Mysticality weapons, as is the special [[Periodical Paintbrush]]. All other items are generally [[melee weapons]], although there are exceptions; for example, the [[lucky ball-and-chain]] is a ranged flail, the [[can of maces]] is a ranged [[:Category:Clubs|club]], and the [[heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr]] is a ranged axe.


If you're clumsy, you may [[fumble]] your weapon on some part of your body. Not only does this hurt, it allows your opponent to get a free hit on you. Which also hurts. And let's face it: everyone's a little clumsy.
If you're clumsy, you may [[fumble]] your weapon on some part of your body. Not only does this hurt, it allows your opponent to get a free hit on you. Which also hurts. And let's face it: everyone's a little clumsy.
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Before an update on September 5th, 2012, weapons only had a power listed. The game would calculate damage by rolling for a number between 10% and 20% of the weapon's power. Following this update, damage scores were instead listed directly on the item's page, replacing power.
Before an update on September 5th, 2012, weapons only had a power listed. The game would calculate damage by rolling for a number between 10% and 20% of the weapon's power. Following this update, damage scores were instead listed directly on the item's page, replacing power.


{| cellpadding="3" cellspacing="0" border="1px" style="border-collapse:collapse; margin:1em auto;" class="sorttable"
{| cellpadding="3" cellspacing="0" border="1px" style="border-collapse:collapse; margin:1em auto;" class="sortable"
|- style="background-color: #EFEFEF"
|- style="background-color: #EFEFEF"
! Name
! Name
Line 46: Line 48:
! Notes
! Notes
|-
|-
|[[7-inch discus]]
||[[Granny Hackleton's Gatling gun]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|85 Moxie
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mox
|1-handed boomerang
|1-handed machine gun
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +25%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +10%
*+10% chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*On [[critical hit]]: grants 3 turns of +50% to All Attributes
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +200%
|-
|-
|[[antique spear]]
||[[Great Wolf's right paw]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=250|250 Mus
|1-handed polearm
|1-handed claw
|
|
*Part of the [[Antique Arms And Armor]]
*Part of the [[Dreadful Werewolf Suit]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-30%</font>
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*[[Pulverize]]s into [[useless powder]]
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]] (SC only)
*Can break in combat
|-
|-
|[[Bigger Bugfinder Blade]]
||[[Great Wolf's rocket launcher]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mox
|2-handed sword
|2-handed bazooka
|
|
*All Attributes +11
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +50
*Awarded to people who find major bugs or a lot of bugs
*+20% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*Grants skill [[Fire Rocket]]
|-
|-
|[[bindlestocking]]
||[[scepter of the Skeleton Lord]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mys
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed staff
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +50%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventures]] per day when equipped
*On [[Critical hit|critical]]: [[bindlestocking#Notes|Merry Crimbo!]]
*+3 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fights]] per day when equipped
* May not equip more than one
|-
|-
|[[brand new key]]
||[[Unkillable Skeleton's restless leg]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mus
|1-handed knife
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +40
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*Regenerate 20-30 [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
|-
|[[Brimstone Bludgeon]]
||[[Unkillable Skeleton's sawsword]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|30 Muscle
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +50%
*+100% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Skeletons
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] <font color=”red”>-20%</font>
*+50% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Zombies
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*+50% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Vampires
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Bad Moon|BM]] reward
*+50% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Werewolves
*+50 [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Ghosts
*+50% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Bugbears
|-
|-
|[[Chester's bag of candy]]
||[[zombie accordion]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=45|30-60
|200 Moxie
|data-sort-value=250|250 Mox
|2-handed ranged weapon
|1-handed accordion
|
|
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +50
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*+5% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
*Keep 1 additional song in your head
*Part of the [[Tawdry Tramp Togs]]
*Enables casting of 20-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Coily™]]
||[[bag of unfinished business]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|200 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mox
|2-handed spring
|2-handed doggie bag
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*+40 {{element|Stench}}
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*+25% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Can be consumed in combat for thousands of damage
|-
|-
|[[cursed cutlass]]
||[[frying brainpan]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|1-handed sword
|1-handed saucepan
|
|
*Part of the [[Cursed Zombie Pirate Costume]]
*+40 Damage to Hot Spells
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*Enables the casting of 20-turn Sauceror buffs
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +200
|-
|-
|[[decaying wooden oar]]
||[[groping claw]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed claw
|&nbsp;
|
*Successful hit weakens opponent.
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[diabolical crossbow]]
||[[hothammer]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|150 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed crossbow
|1-handed club
|
|  
*[[Slime Hates It]]
*+50 {{element|Hot}}
*+30 {{element|Spooky}}
*+2% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[El Vibrato energy spear]]
||[[old dry bone]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed spear
|1-handed club
|
|  
*Part of the [[El Vibrato Relics]]
*+50 {{element|Spooky}}
*Can be [[El Vibrato helmet|charged]] with various effects
|-
|-
|[[fetus-smashing club]]
||[[remorseless knife]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=34|23-45
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed knife
|A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[Bashy]]
|  
*Successful hit causes bleeding.
|-
|-
|[[fish bazooka]]
||[[7-inch discus]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed bazooka
|1-handed boomerang
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
*On [[critical hit]]: grants 3 turns of +50% to All Attributes
|-
|-
|[[fish scimitar]]
||[[Bigger Bugfinder Blade]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*All Attributes +11
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +10%
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventure(s)]] per day when equipped
*Awarded to people who find major bugs or a lot of bugs
|-
|-
|[[fish stick]]
||[[bindlestocking]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5%
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +15%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*On [[Critical hit|critical]]: [[bindlestocking#Notes|Merry Crimbo!]]
|-
|-
|[[Flail of the Seven Aspects]]
||[[Bloodbath]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed flail
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Turtle Tamer]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*So-So [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance]] to All Elements (+2)
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Chelonian Overlord]]
*Regenerate 25-30 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*Handle Doubles as a [[turtling rod|Turtling Rod]]
*Special Attack: [[Turtle of Seven Tails]]
|-
|-
|[[flamin' bindle]]
||[[brand new key]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed knife
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*+25 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*Does extra {{element|Hot}} on critical hits
|-
|-
|[[freezin' bindle]]
||[[Brimstone Bludgeon]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed club
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +50%
*+25 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] <font color=red>-20%</font>
*Does extra {{element|Cold}} on critical hits
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Bad Moon|BM]] reward
|-
|-
|[[Frosty's arm]]
||[[Byte]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed staff
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +100%
*+30 {{element|Cold}}
*+15% chance of Spell Critical Hit
|-
|-
|[[Frosty's nailbat]]
||[[Chester's bag of candy]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mox
|2-handed club
|2-handed ranged weapon
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*Part of the [[Tawdry Tramp Togs]]
*+3% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+30 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
*Part of the [[Hyperborean Hobo Habiliments]]
|-
|-
|[[Frosty's snowball sack]]
||[[Coily™]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mox
|1-handed sack
|2-handed spring
| +50 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|[[giant fishhook]]
|20-40
|85 Moxie
|2-handed spear
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[halibut]]
|20-40
|85 Muscle
|2-handed fish
|
|
*+100 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*+100 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] <font color=”red”>-10%</font>
*+25% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Can be consumed in combat for thousands of damage
|-
|-
|[[Hodgman's whackin' stick]]
||[[cozy bazooka]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed club
|2-handed bazooka
|
|
*All Attributes +20%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*On Critical: Insanity!
*+20% Meat from Monsters
*Makes you a much better diver
|-
|-
|[[lawn dart]]
||[[cozy scimitar]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +20%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +300
*Makes you a much better diver
*Can be consumed in combat for thousands of damage
|-
|-
|[[Mer-kin hookspear]]
||[[cursed cutlass]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed spear
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*Part of the [[Cursed Zombie Pirate Costume]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +40
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*Extracts [[Meat]] on critical hits
|-
||[[decaying wooden oar]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed club
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[deep six-shooter]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +40
*+6% chance of Critical Hit
|-
|-
|[[Mer-kin digpick]]
||[[diabolical crossbow]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mox
|2-handed axe
|1-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Slime Hates It]]
*Allows for mining in the [[Anemone Mine]]
*+30 {{element|Spooky}}
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[Mjolnir Jr.]]
||[[Dinsey's pizza cutter]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed utensil
|A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Thor the Mighty
|
*Part of the [[Dinsey's Exoskeleton]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +50%
*So-So Resistance to All [[Elemental Resistance|Elements]] (+2)
*Motorized Blade is Good for Twisting
|-
|-
|[[non-stick pugil stick]]
||[[dreadful glove]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed knife-glove
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%
*Part of the [[Dreadful Pajamas]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +10%
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*On [[critical hit]]: [[Stunning|Stuns Opponent]]
*Lets you find 5% more Krueggerands
|-
|-
|[[octopus's spade]]
||[[duct tape sword]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=29.5|20-39
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=82|82 Mus
|1-handed knife
|1-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Tapered Threads]]
*[[Damage Absorption]] +40
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[Ol' Scratch's infernal pitchfork]]
||[[egg gun]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*+40 {{element|Hot}}
*+25 {{element|Stench}}
*+2% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*+75% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops from Monsters]]
*[[HP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 15-20 HP per adventure
|-
|-
|[[pernicious cudgel]]
||[[El Vibrato energy spear]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|150 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed spear
|
|
*[[Slime Hates It]]
*Part of the [[El Vibrato Relics]]
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Can be [[El Vibrato helmet|charged]] with various effects
*+2% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[PVC staff]]
||[[FDKOL fire hose]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed staff
|2-handed hose
|
|  
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15%
*+200 {{element|Cold}}
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+60 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[rusty piece of rebar]]
||[[fetus-smashing club]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed club
|
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[Bashy]]
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[rusty speargun]]
||[[fire axe]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed pistol
|2-handed axe
|
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*+200 {{element|Cold}}
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*On Critical: Deals 50-60 additional damage
|-
|-
|[[Seeger's Unstoppable Banjo]]
||[[fish bazooka]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed banjo
|2-handed bazooka
|
|
*[[Disco Bandit]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Groovelord]]
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15
*+23% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+15 damage to Disco Bandit Combat Skills
*Special Attack: [[Funk Bluegrass Fusion]]
|-
|-
|[[skate blade]]
||[[fish scimitar]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed knife
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*[[Monster Level|Devels on hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[skate board]]
||[[fish stick]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed staff
|
|
*All Attributes +10%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5%
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +15%
|-
|-
|[[sleazy bindle]]
||[[Flail of the Seven Aspects]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed flail
|
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Chelonian Overlord]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*Handle Doubles as a [[turtling rod|Turtling Rod]]
*Special Attack: [[Turtle of Seven Tails]]
*Enables the casting of 20-turn TT buffs
*[[Turtle Tamer]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|-
||[[flamin' bindle]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+25 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+25 {{element|Hot}}
*Does extra {{element|Sleaze}} on critical hits  
*Does extra {{element|Hot}} on critical hits  
|-
|-
|[[Sledgehammer of the Vælkyr]]
||[[freezin' bindle]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Seal Clubber]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Seal Crusher]]
*+25 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +23
*Does extra {{element|Cold}} on critical hits
*4x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+20% Physical Damage
*Special Attack: [[Bashing Slam Smash]]
|-
|-
|[[slime-covered club]]
||[[Frosty's arm]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed staff
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*+50 Damage vs. Slimes
*+30 {{element|Cold}}
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[slime-covered shovel]]
||[[Frosty's nailbat]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +60
*Part of the [[Hyperborean Hobo Habiliments]]
*+100 Damage vs. Slimes
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-10%</font>
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
*+30 {{element|Cold}}
|[[slime-covered speargun]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
|20-40
 
|200 Moxie
|-
|1-handed pistol
||[[Frosty's snowball sack]]
|
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mox
*+50 Damage vs. Slimes
|1-handed sack
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|
*+50 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[spooky bindle]]
||[[fruit bat]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed club
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+50% [[Items from Monsters|Weapon Drops from Monsters]]
*+25 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +75
*Does extra {{element|Spooky}} on critical hits
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|Seal Clubbers]] only
|-
|-
|[[stinkin' bindle]]
||[[garbage sticker]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed spear
|
|
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+20% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops from Monsters]]
*+25 {{element|Stench}}
*+20% [[Items from Monsters|Booze Drops from Monsters]]
*Does extra {{element|Stench}} on critical hits 
*+20% [[Items from Monsters|Accessory Drops from Monsters]]
*+20% [[Items from Monsters|Weapon Drops from Monsters]]
*+20% [[Items from Monsters|Hat/Pants Drops from Monsters]]
*+30% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[giant fishhook]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed spear
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[super-sweet boom box]]
||[[giant shrimp fork]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed radio
|2-handed staff
|
|
*All Attributes +20%
*Mysticality +20%
*Regenerate 5-10 [[HP]] and [[MP]] per adventure
*+10% Chance of Spell Critical Hit
*Allows you to keep 4 songs in your head instead of 3.
*Maximum MP +100
|-
|-
|[[teflon spatula]]
||[[giant turkey leg]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|3-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*Serious {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
*Monsters will be more attracted to you.
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +40
|-
|-
|[[The Trickster's Trikitixa]]
||[[Ginsu™]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed accordion
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Accordion Thief]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+100% Food Drops from Monsters
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Master Squeezeboxer]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15
|-
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +23
||[[gunwale whalegun]]
*+11% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
*Special Attack: [[Extreme High Note]]
|data-sort-value=0|None
*Enables casting of 20-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
|2-handed machine gun
|
*[[Damage Absorption]] +100
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*Slight [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance to all Elements]] (+1)
|-
|-
|[[Uncle Hobo's highest bough]]
||[[halibut]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed fish
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*+100 {{element|Stench}}
*[[HP Restorers|Regenerate]] 15-30 HP per adventure
*+100 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 15-30 MP per adventure
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] <font color=red>-10%</font>
|-
|-
|[[Underworld flail]]
||[[Hodgman's whackin' stick]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|150 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed flail
|1-handed club
|
|
*+10 Moxie [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*All Attributes +20%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +30
*On Critical: Insanity!
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[Underworld truncheon]]
||[[The Jokester's gun]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|150 Muscle
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mox
|2-handed club
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*+10 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*Part of [[The Jokester's Costume]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +20%
*+5 [[Prismatic Damage]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +25%
*+50% [[Items from Monsters|Pants Drops from Monsters]]
*Can be fired in a weird way once per day to instantly defeat an opponent
|-
|-
|[[velcro broadsword]]
||[[lawn dart]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 6-12 MP per adventure
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20%
*+20% Hat/Pants [[Items from Monsters]]
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +300
*Can be consumed in combat for thousands of damage
|-
|-
|[[velcro paddle ball]]
||[[Meatcleaver]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed flail
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*+35% Meat from Monsters
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 6-12 MP per adventure
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*+20% Accessory [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[villainous scythe]]
||[[Mer-kin digpick]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|150 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed axe
|
|
*Part of the [[Grimy Reaper's Vestments]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Slime Hates It]] x2
*Allows for mining in the [[Anemone Mine]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +30%
*+4% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[Windsor Pan of the Source]]
||[[Mer-kin dodgeball]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed saucepan
|2-handed dodgeball
|
|
*[[Sauceror]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+7 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped.*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Saucemaestro]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +23
*+11% chance of [[Critical Spell Chance|Spell Critical Hit]]
*Special Attack: [[Saucemageddon]]
|-
|-
|[[Wrath of the Capsaician Pastalords]]
||[[Mer-kin dragnet]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|2-handed dragnet
|
|
*[[Pastamancer]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+7 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped.*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Pasta Master]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*+50% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops From Monsters]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +40%
*Special Attack: [[Noodles of Fire]]
|-
|-
|[[Zim Merman's guitar]]
||[[Mer-kin finpaddle]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|85 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed guitar
|1-handed club
|[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
|
*+100% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Mer-kin
|-
|-
|[[Zombo's shoulder blade]]
||[[Mer-kin hookspear]]
|20-40
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|200 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed spear
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +40
*Extracts [[Meat]] on critical hits
|-
|-
|[[duct tape sword]]
||[[Mer-kin switchblade]]
|20-39
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|82 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed switchblade
|
|
*Part of the [[Tapered Threads]]
*+7 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped.
*[[Damage Absorption]] +40
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +0%-50%
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[beer-a-pult]]
||[[miniature deck cannon]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|3-handed catapult
|2-handed handcannon
|
|
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +25
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Regenerate 10-20 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
|-
|[[beer bong]]
||[[Mjolnir Jr.]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mys
|1-handed bong
|1-handed utensil
|
|  
*+15 {{element|Stench}}
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Thor the Mighty
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
|-
|[[cast-iron legacy paddle]]
||[[non-stick pugil stick]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
*On [[critical hit]]: [[Stunning|Stuns Opponent]]
|-
|-
|[[fire poi]]
||[[octopus's spade]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed flail
|1-handed knife
|
|
*+15 {{element|Hot}}
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[giant driftwood sculpture]]
||[[Ol' Scratch's infernal pitchfork]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed flail
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
*+40 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[massive sitar]]
||[[pernicious cudgel]]
|19-38
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|80 Moxie
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mus
|2-handed sitar
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +12
*[[Slime Hates It]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[Bugfinder Blade]]
||[[Pigsticker of Violence]]
|18-36
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Muscle
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed knife
|
|
*All Attributes +7
*Part of the [[Violent Vestments]]
*Awarded to people who find a few bugs
*Regenerate 20-30 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] per adventure
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +60%
*Lets you stab opponents as they fail to attack you
|-
|-
|[[didgeridooka]]
||[[PVC staff]]
|18-36
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed heavy blowgun
|2-handed staff
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +9
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15%
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+60 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[goatskin umbrella]]
||[[rusty piece of rebar]]
|18-36
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed umbrella
|1-handed club
| +15 {{element|Stench}}
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[plexiglass pikestaff]]
||[[rusty speargun]]
|18-36
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed club
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+10 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*On Critical: Deals 50-60 additional damage
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Hardcore|HC]][[Oxygenarian|O]] reward
|-
|-
|[[war tongs]]
||[[rusty staff]]
|18-36
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|75 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|2-handed staff
|
|
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +25
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*+5% chance of Spell Critical Hit
|-
|-
|[[honey dipper]]
||[[Seeger's Unstoppable Banjo]]
|18-35
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|72 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|2-handed banjo
|
|
*Part of the [[Bits o' Honey]]
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Groovelord]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 3-7 MP per adventure
*+23% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
*+15 damage to Disco Bandit Combat Skills
*Special Attack: [[Funk Bluegrass Fusion]]
*[[Disco Bandit]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|-
|-
|[[lead pipe]]
||[[skate blade]]
|18-35
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|72 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed knife
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +6
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +6
*[[Monster Level|Devels on hit]]
|-
|-
|[[perforated battle paddle]]
||[[skate board]]
|18-35
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|72 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed club
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|
*All Attributes +10%
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 10
|-
|-
|[[toy ray gun]]
||[[sleazy bindle]]
|18-35
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|72 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed pistol
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+25 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Does extra {{element|Sleaze}} on critical hits
|-
|-
|[[Drowsy Sword]]
||[[Sledgehammer of the Vælkyr]]
|17-34
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|66 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Seal Crusher]]
*[[Monster Level]] <font color=”red”>-10</font>
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +23
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+20% Physical Damage
*Special Attack: [[Bashing Slam Smash]]
*[[Seal Clubber]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|-
|-
|[[charming flute]]
||[[slime-covered club]]
|17-34
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|70 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed flute
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+20 [[Bonus Weapon Damage]] vs. Snakes
*+50 Damage vs. Slimes
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[denim axe]]
||[[slime-covered shovel]]
|17-34
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|70 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed axe
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +60
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+100 Damage vs. Slimes
|-
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-10%</font>
|[[giant foam finger]]
|17-34
|70 Muscle
|1-handed club
|[[Damage Reduction]]: +3
|-
|-
|[[dwarvish war mattock]]
||[[slime-covered speargun]]
|17-33
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|67 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mox
|1-handed axe
|
*Part of the [[Dwarvish War Uniform]]
*Shows monster HP
|-
|[[happiness]]
|17-33
|67 Moxie
|1-handed pistol
|1-handed pistol
| +12 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|[[Maxwell's Silver Hammer]]
|17-33
|67 Muscle
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+50 Damage vs. Slimes
|-
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|[[pygmy spear]]
|17-33
|67 Muscle
|1-handed spear
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
|-
|[[star crossbow]]
|17-33
|67 Moxie
|2-handed crossbow
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
|-
|-
|[[star staff]]
||[[slime-covered staff]]
|17-33
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|67 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +8
|
*All Spells Cast Are Sleazy
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +60
*[[Combat Initiative]] -10%
|-
|-
|[[star sword]]
||[[soap knife]]
|17-33
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|67 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed knife
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +8
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[arse-shooting crossbow]]
||[[spooky bindle]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Kucolan
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*All Attributes +15
*+25 {{element|Spooky}}
*Allows [[Arse Shoot]]
*Does extra {{element|Spooky}} on critical hits
|-
|-
|[[black sword]]
||[[Stick-Knife of Loathing]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed knife
|
|
*Part of the [[Black Armaments]]
*Part of the [[Clothing of Loathing]]
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*Superhuman Cold [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance]] (+5)
|-
|-
|[[creepy-ass club]]
||[[stinkin' bindle]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*+25 {{element|Stench}}
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*Does extra {{element|Stench}} on critical hits 
*+15 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|sleaze|}} at end of combat
|-
|-
|[[cyber-mattock]]
||[[super-sweet boom box]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mox
|2-handed axe
|1-handed radio
|
|
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*All Attributes +20%
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Regenerate 5-10 [[HP]] and [[MP]] per adventure
*May break in combat
*Allows you to keep 4 songs in your head instead of 3.
|-
|-
|[[evil-ass club]]
||[[Sword of Procedural Generation]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*Varies player to player
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+15 {{element|Spooky}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|spooky|}} at the end of combat
|-
|-
|[[frigid-ass club]]
||[[teflon spatula]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mys
|2-handed club
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*Serious {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +40
*+15 {{element|Cold}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|cold|}} at the end of combat
|-
|-
|[[giant cactus quill]]
||[[The Trickster's Trikitixa]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|1-handed spear
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Master Squeezeboxer]]
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +30
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15
|-
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +23
|[[heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr]]
*+11% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
|16-32
*Special Attack: [[Extreme High Note]]
|65 Moxie
*Enables casting of 20-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
|2-handed axe
*[[Accordion Thief]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +16
|-
|-
|[[hot-ass club]]
||[[triple barreled barrel gun]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|2-handed club
|3-handed shotgun
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*Weapon Damage +100%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*+10% Chance of Critical Hit
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+25% Meat from Monsters
*+15 {{element|Cold}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|hot|}} at the end of combat
|-
|-
|[[jungle drum]]
||[[Truthsayer]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed drum
|1-handed sword
|
|
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*+12 to [[Monster Level]]
*So-So {{element|Spooky|Resistance}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +40%
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-20%</font>
|-
|-
|[[nasty-ass club]]
||[[Uncle Hobo's highest bough]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[HP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 15-30 HP per adventure
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 15-30 MP per adventure
*+15 {{element|Stench}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|stench|}} at the end of combat
|-
|-
|[[pointed stick]]
||[[Underworld flail]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mox
|1-handed spear
|2-handed flail
|
|
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+10 Moxie [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +30
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[trout fang]]
||[[Underworld truncheon]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Muscle
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mus
|1-handed knife
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+10 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*25% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[yohohoyo]]
||[[velcro broadsword]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mus
|1-handed yoyo
|1-handed sword
|
|
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*+1 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 6-12 MP per adventure
*+1 {{element|Stench}}
*+20% Hat/Pants [[Items from Monsters]]
*+1 {{element|Hot}}
*+1 {{element|Cold}}
*+1 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[x-37 gun]]
||[[velcro paddle ball]]
|16-32
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|65 Moxie
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|1-handed flail
|
|
*Attack damage in a random element
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5%
*Can break in combat, damaging player
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 6-12 MP per adventure
*+20% Accessory [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[giant discarded plastic fork]]
||[[villainous scythe]]
|16-31
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|62 Muscle
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mus
|3-handed staff
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*Part of the [[Glad Bag Glad Rags]]
*Part of the [[Grimy Reaper's Vestments]]
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Slime Hates It]] x2
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-10%</font>
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30%
*+20% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[magilaser blastercannon]]
||[[White Dragon Fang]]
|16-31
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|62 Moxie
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|2-handed laser cannon
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +15
*All Attributes +9%
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Prismatic Damage]] +9
*Regenerate 9 [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
|-
|[[automatic catapult]]
||[[Windsor Pan of the Source]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|2-handed autopult
|1-handed saucepan
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme]]
|15-30
|60 Muscle
|2-handed polearm?
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[bugbear-smiting sword]]
|15-30
|60 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|
|
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Spazworrier
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Saucemaestro]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +23
*+11% chance of [[Critical Spell Chance|Spell Critical Hit]]
*Special Attack: [[Saucemageddon]]
*Enables the casting of 20-turn Sauceror buffs
*[[Sauceror]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|-
||[[wolf whistle]]
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed whistle
|
*Grants skill [[Blow Wolf Whistle]]
*Regenerate 10-20 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*+100 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[C.B.F.G.]]
||[[Wrath of the Capsaician Pastalords]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|2-handed rifle
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*Part of the [[Crimborg Assault Armor]]
*Part of the [[Legendary Regalia of the Pasta Master]]
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*+50% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops From Monsters]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +40%
*Special Attack: [[Noodles of Fire]]
*[[Pastamancer]]'s [[Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|-
|-
|[[C.H.U.M. knife]]
||[[Zim Merman's guitar]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|175 Muscle
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mox
|1-handed knife
|2-handed guitar
| +30 {{element|Stench}}
|  
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
|-
|-
|[[club of the five seasons]]
||[[Zombo's shoulder blade]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=30|20-40
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed sword
|
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30%
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[drywall axe]]
||[[beer bong]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mox
|2-handed axe
|1-handed bong
|
|
*All Attributes +2
*+15 {{element|Stench}}
*All Attributes +3%
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
|-
|[[giant needle]]
||[[beer-a-pult]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mox
|2-handed spear
|3-handed catapult
|[[Monster Level]] +5
|
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[grassy cutlass]]
||[[cast-iron legacy paddle]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed club
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +11
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[Grimacite gat]]
||[[fire poi]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|40 Moxie
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mox
|1-handed gun
|2-handed flail
|
|
*A prize from [[The Raffle House]]
*+15 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +0-50% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[heavy leather-bound tome]]
||[[giant driftwood sculpture]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed flail
|Successful hit [[Monster Level|weakens opponent]]
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[heteroerotic frat-paddle]]
||[[massive sitar]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=28.5|19-38
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=80|80 Mox
|1-handed club
|2-handed sitar
|A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[Mr Skullhead]]
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +12
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20
|-
|-
|[[immense cyborg hand]]
||[[alarm accordion]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mox
|1-handed club
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventure(s)]] per day when equipped.
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*Enables casting of 20-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[pipe wrench]]
||[[Bugfinder Blade]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mus
|1-handed club
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +8
|-
|[[Radio Free Foil]]
|15-30
|60 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Radio Free Regalia]]
*All Attributes +7
*Intrinsic Effect: [[Shiny Happy Weapon]]:
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventure(s)]] per day when equipped
**[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20
*Awarded to people who find a few bugs
|-
||[[didgeridooka]]
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mox
|2-handed heavy blowgun
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +9
|-
|-
|[[rainbow crossbow]]
||[[ghast iron cleaver]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=26.5|18-35
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=72|72 Mus
|1-handed crossbow
|1-handed club
|
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*Part of the [[Ghast Iron Gear]]
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*+15 Spooky Damage
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+15 Hot Damage
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
|-
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
||[[goatskin umbrella]]
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mus
|1-handed umbrella
|
*+15 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[star spatula]]
||[[honey dipper]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=26.5|18-35
|60 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=72|72 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed utensil
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
|-
|[[vibrating cyborg knife]]
|15-30
|55 Muscle
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*Part of the [[Bits o' Honey]]
*<font color=”red”>3x</font> [[Fumble Chance]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5%
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 3-7 MP per adventure
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[witty rapier]]
||[[oversized pipe]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=26.5|18-35
|60 Muscle
|data-sort-value=72|72 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed club
| +2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]] (Myst substat only)
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +6
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +6
|-
|-
|[[world's smallest violin]]
||[[perforated battle paddle]]
|15-30
|data-sort-value=26.5|18-35
|60 Moxie
|data-sort-value=72|72 Mus
|1-handed violin
|2-handed club
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|-
||[[plexiglass pikestaff]]
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mus
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+9 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
*+5 to [[Monster Level]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +30%
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Hardcore|HC]][[Oxygenarian|O]] reward
|-
|-
|[[a butt tuba]]
||[[toy ray gun]]
|15-29
|data-sort-value=26.5|18-35
|57 Moxie
|data-sort-value=72|72 Mox
|2-handed horn
|1-handed pistol
| +15 {{element|Sleaze}}
|
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[batblade]]
||[[unsanitized scalpel]]
|15-29
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|57 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed knife
|1-handed knife
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|
*+25 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[acoustic guitarrr]]
||[[war tongs]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=27|18-36
|55 Moxie
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|2-handed guitar
|1-handed utensil
| +2% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[armgun]]
||[[ancient ice cream scoop]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|55 Moxie
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mys
|2-handed machine gun
|1-handed utensil
|
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] + 10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[black kettle drum]]
||[[charming flute]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|55 Moxie
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mox
|2-handed drum
|2-handed flute
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +30
*+20 [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] vs. Snakes
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +30
|-
|-
|[[frozen seal spine]]
||[[combat fan]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|55 Muscle
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed flail
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*+3 Prismatic Damage
*+20 {{element|Cold}}
*[[HP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-10 HP per adventure
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-10 MP per adventure
|-
|-
|[[gatorskin umbrella]]
||[[denim axe]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|100 Muscle
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mus
|1-handed umbrella
|2-handed axe
|
|
*Serious {{element|Stench|Resistance}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[ridiculously huge sword]]
||[[Drowsy Sword]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|55 Muscle
|data-sort-value=66|66 Mus
|3-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +12
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
*[[Monster Level]] <font color=red>-10</font>
|-
|-
|[[silver cheese-slicer]]
||[[dwarvish war mattock]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|55 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed axe
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10%
|
*Part of the [[Dwarvish War Uniform]]
*Shows monster HP
|-
|-
|[[silver paté knife]]
||[[giant foam finger]]
|14-28
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|55 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed club
| +5% chance of [[Critical Spell Chance|Spell Critical Hit]]
|  
*[[Damage Reduction]]: +3
|-
|-
|[[broken sword]]
||[[happiness]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|52 Muscle
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mox
|1-handed sword
|1-handed pistol
|Slight {{element|Spooky|Resistance}}
|
*+12 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[carob cannon]]
||[[Maxwell's Silver Hammer]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[hairy staff]]
||[[peace accordion]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25.5|17-34
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=70|70 Mox
|2-handed staff
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*+12 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*Enables casting of 19-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-7 MP per Adventure
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[ram-battering staff]]
||[[pygmy spear]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|52 Muscle
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed spear
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
|-
||[[red-hot poker]]
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*+15 Hot Damage
|-
||[[Saturday Night Special]]
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*So-So Hot Resistance (+2)
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|-
|[[rave whistle]]
||[[short-handled mop]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|52 Moxie
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed whistle
|1-handed polearm
|
|
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +10
*+10 Stench Damage
*+10 [[Monster Level]]
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[Spirit Precipice]]
||[[star crossbow]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mox
|2-handed sword
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +8
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*5x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[star boomerang]]
||[[star staff]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|52 Moxie
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed boomerang
|2-handed staff
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|  
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +8
|-
|-
|[[star stiletto]]
||[[star sword]]
|14-27
|data-sort-value=25|17-33
|52 Muscle
|data-sort-value=67|67 Mus
|1-handed knife
|2-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|  
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +8
|-
|-
|[[4-dimensional guitar]]
||[[accordionoid rocca]]
|13-26
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|50 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed guitar
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +7
*Damage Reduction: 10 (First Hit Only)
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*Enables casting of 18-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[bad-ass club]]
||[[antique machete]]
|13-26
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|50 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed sword
|
|  
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +15
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
|-
|[[hot cross bow]]
||[[arse-shooting crossbow]]
|13-26
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Kucolan
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*All Attributes +15
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*Grants skill [[Arse Shoot]]
|-
|-
|[[lucky ball-and-chain]]
||[[black blade]]
|13-26
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|50 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed flail
|1-handed knife
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[sword behind inappropriate prepositions]]
|13-26
|45 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*+10 Spooky Damage
*+5 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*Successful attacks [[HP Restorers|restore]] some HP
|-
|-
|[[titanium assault umbrella]]
||[[black sword]]
|13-26
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|50 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|1-handed umbrella
|Slight [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance to All Elements]]
|-
|[[crazy bastard sword]]
|13-25
|25 Muscle
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*An [[Ultra Rares|ultra-rare item]]
*Part of the [[Black Armaments]]
*+7 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +7
*+2% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[curmudgel]]
||[[breadchucks]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|47 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed flail
|
|
*[[Monster Level]] +8
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*Can also be used in combat
|-
|-
|[[ga-ga radio]]
||[[coal shovel]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|47 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed radio
|
*+1 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +20
|-
|[[Grimacite glaive]]
|13-25
|47 Muscle
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*A prize from [[The Raffle House]]
*Grants skill [[Shovel Hot Coal]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +0-50% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[meatspout staff]]
||[[creepy-ass club]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+15% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+15 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|sleaze|}} at end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[pitchfork]]
||[[cyber-mattock]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|47 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|1-handed spear
|2-handed axe
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +9
|-
|[[projectile icemaker]]
|13-25
|45 Moxie
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*May break in combat
|-
|-
|[[shuddersword]]
||[[evil-ass club]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed sword
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*+15 {{element|Spooky}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|spooky|}} at the end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[smoldering staff]]
||[[fleetwood chain]]
|13-25
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed flail
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*Weapon Damage +5
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*+11 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[asbestos sword]]
||[[frigid-ass club]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed sword
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+15 {{element|Cold}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|cold|}} at the end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[bone and arrows]]
||[[giant cactus quill]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed bow
|1-handed spear
| +30 Damage vs. Skeletons
|
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|chance]] of Critical Hit
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +30
|-
|-
|[[bone crusher]]
||[[giant discarded plastic fork]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|1-handed club
|3-handed staff
| +30 Damage vs. Skeletons
|-
|[[buffalo blade]]
|12-24
|45 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*Part of the [[Glad Bag Glad Rags]]
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-10%</font>
|-
|-
|[[chrome crossbow]]
||[[giant safety pin]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed spear
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*Successful hit weakens opponent.
|-
|-
|[[giant cheesestick]]
||[[half-size scalpel]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed knife
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
*+11 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*Makes you look like a doctor
|-
|-
|[[lawnmower blade]]
||[[heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed sword
|2-handed axe
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +16
|-
|-
|[[linoleum staff]]
||[[hot-ass club]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+15 {{element|Cold}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|hot|}} at the end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[ocarina of space]]
||[[jungle drum]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed flute
|2-handed drum
|
|
*All Attributes +4
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +5
*So-So {{element|Spooky|Resistance}}
*+2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-20%</font>
|-
|-
|[[potato pistol]]
||[[magilaser blastercannon]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Moxie
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|2-handed laser cannon
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +15
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[Ruby Rod]]
||[[nasty-ass club]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|40 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|1-handed rod
|2-handed club
|Used in the [[Future]] quest
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*+15 [[Monster Level]]
*+15 {{element|Stench}}
*Player loses 10 HP due to {{element|stench|}} at the end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[silver shrimp fork]]
||[[The Nuge's favorite crossbow]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|45 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +14
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +30
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Combat Initiative]] +100%
*Increased adventures and stats when eating [[pr0n cocktail]]s
*+5 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventure(s)]] per day when equipped
|-
|-
|[[two-handed depthsword]]
||[[pewter claymore]]
|12-24
|data-sort-value=23.5|16-31
|45 Muscle
|data-sort-value=62|62 Mus
|2-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|&nbsp;
|  
*Regenerate 6-12 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
|-
|[[old school Mafia knicke½æ]]
||[[pointed stick]]
|12-23
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|41 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed spear
|[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +27
|
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[lupine sword]]
||[[tommy gun]]
|12-23
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|42 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|1-handed sword
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*+9 {{element|Spooky}}
*Weapon Damage +5
*+9 additional {{element|Spooky}} if a [[snarling wolf shield]] is equipped
*Grants skill [[Unload Tommy Gun]]
|-
|-
|[[ram stick]]
||[[trout fang]]
|12-23
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|42 Muscle
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed knife
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|[[serpentine sword]]
|12-23
|42 Muscle
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Monster Level]] +10
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*[[Monster Level]] +10 more if wielded with a [[snake shield]]
*25% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|-
|-
|[[asbestos crossbow]]
||[[X-37 gun]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|40 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*Attack damage in a random element
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*Can break in combat, damaging player
|-
|-
|[[bone flute]]
||[[yohohoyo]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=24|16-32
|40 Moxie
|data-sort-value=65|65 Mox
|2-handed flute
|1-handed yoyo
| +11 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|[[chrome staff]]
|11-22
|40 Muscle
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*+1 {{element|Spooky}}
*+1 {{element|Stench}}
*+1 {{element|Hot}}
*+1 {{element|Cold}}
*+1 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[iron pasta spoon]]
||[[a butt tuba]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=22|15-29
|40 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=57|57 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|2-handed horn
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|  
|-
* +15 {{element|Sleaze}}
|[[linoleum sword]]
|11-22
|40 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|-
|-
|[[machetito]]
||[[antique nutcracker sword]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|40 Muscle
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +9
|  
*Part of the [[Antique Nutcracker Outfit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
|-
|-
|[[mannequin leg]]
||[[antique spear]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=30|15-30
|40 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed polearm
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*Part of the [[Antique Arms And Armor]]
*+20 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-30%</font>
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*[[Pulverize]]s into [[useless powder]]
*Can break in combat
|-
|-
|[[sack of doorknobs]]
||[[automatic catapult]]
|11-22
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|40 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|2-handed sack
|2-handed autopult
|&nbsp;
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[asbestos staff]]
||[[backwoods banjo]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mox
|2-handed staff
|2-handed banjo
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*+20% to all [[Stat Gains from Fights|Moxie Gains]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +40
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +200
|-
|-
|[[bamboo bokuto]]
||[[bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed polearm?
|&nbsp;
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[big stirring stick]]
||[[bugbear-smiting sword]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to Spazworrier
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
|-
|-
|[[bottle-rocket crossbow]]
||[[C.B.F.G.]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|1-handed crossbow
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*+15% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Part of the [[Crimborg Assault Armor]]
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*Shoots [[Bottle-rocket crossbow#Notes|bottle-rockets]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[bounty-hunting rifle]]
||[[C.H.U.M. knife]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=175|175 Mus
|2-handed rifle
|1-handed knife
|
|
*Part of the [[Bounty-Hunting Rig]]
*+30 {{element|Stench}}
*+15% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[bow staff]]
||[[candy knife]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed knife
|
| &nbsp;
*Part of the [[Bow Tux]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
|-
|[[can of fake snow]]
||[[club of the five seasons]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed can
|1-handed club
|
|
*Part of the [[Arboreal Raiment]]
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[chrome sword]]
||[[double barreled barrel gun]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|2-handed sword
|2-handed shotgun
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*+5% Chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[Crimbomination Contraption]]
||[[drywall axe]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed axe
|&nbsp;
|
*All Attributes +2
*All Attributes +3%
|-
|-
|[[Crimbo sword]]
||[[flaming sword]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Crimbo Duds]]
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+10% chance of Spell Critical Hit
*Never Fumble
|-
|-
|[[depleted Grimacite hammer]]
||[[giant artisanal rice peeler]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|2-handed club
|1-handed utensil
|
|  
*[[Monster Level]] +0-25 based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
*Needed for depleted Grimacite smithing
|-
|-
|[[duck-on-a-string]]
||[[giant needle]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed flail
|2-handed spear
|
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Monster Level]] +5
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[elven whittling knife]]
||[[grassy cutlass]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed knife
|1-handed sword
|Does extra damage on criticals
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +11
|-
|-
|[[flaming juggler's balls]]
||[[grease cannon]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed euphemisms
|1-handed bazooka
|
|
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*+2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*+20 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
*Sets opponents on fire
|-
|-
|[[giant candy cane]]
||[[Grimacite gat]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|1-handed gun
|
|
|2-handed staff
*A prize from [[The Raffle House]]
|
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*+40% [[Items from Monsters|Candy from Monsters]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +0-50% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[goulauncher]]
||[[heavy leather-bound tome]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed club
|
|  
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
*Successful hit [[Monster Level|weakens opponent]]
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[haiku katana]]
||[[heteroerotic frat-paddle]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed club
|
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[Mr Skullhead]]
|-
||[[immense cyborg hand]]
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +50%
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*+1% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*Allows use of [[The 17 Cuts]], [[Falling Leaf Whirlwind]], [[Spring Raindrop Attack]], [[Summer Siesta]], [[Winter's Bite Technique]] in combat
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[ice sickle]]
||[[keel-haulin' knife]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|1-handed knife
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Monster Level]] +15
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +17
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[infernal toilet brush]]
||[[love]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed club
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*+50% [[Items from Monsters|Pants Drops from Monsters]]
*+20 {{element|Stench}}
*Regenerate 8-16 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +20
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +20
|-
|-
|[[linoleum crossbow]]
||[[mercenary rifle]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*Ranged Damage +20
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*Combat Initiative +50%
*Allows the Use of Specialty Ammunition
|-
|-
|[[Loathing Legion chainsaw]]
||[[murderbot plasma rifle]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|2-handed chainsaw
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*+25 {{element|Hot}}
*Successful hit [[Monster Level|weakens opponent]]
*[[Deleveling|Reduce enemy defense]] by 10%
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
*Can be used to instantly kill Spants
|-
|-
|[[Loathing Legion double prism]]
||[[obsidian nutcracker]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|1-handed prism
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
*Spell Damage +30%
*+2 {{element|Stench}}
|-
*+2 {{element|Hot}}
||[[Othello's dagger]]
*+2 {{element|Cold}}
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mus
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|1-handed knife
|  
*+10 [[Othello Skill]]
|-
|-
|[[Loathing Legion flamethrower]]
||[[Pener's drumstick]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed flamethrower
|1-handed club
|
|
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*+5% Chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*Sets opponents on fire
|-
|-
|[[Loathing Legion hammer]]
||[[pipe wrench]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed hammer
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Loathing Legion hammer#Notes|Gets the job done]]
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +8
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[Mafia violin case]]
||[[pygmy concertinette]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|1-handed club
|1-handed accordion
|
|
*Prize from the Penguin Mafia [[Mystery Raffle Ticket|Mystery Raffle]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20
*Enables casting of 17-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Moonthril Flamberge]]
||[[Radio Free Foil]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|40 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|2-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Luniform]]
*Part of the [[Radio Free Regalia]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +0-75% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20
|-
|-
|[[Moonthril Longbow]]
||[[rainbow crossbow]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|40 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|2-handed bow
|1-handed crossbow
|
|
*Part of the [[Luniform]]
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +0-75% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[origami riding crop]]
||[[spectral axe]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mus
|1-handed crop
|1-handed axe
|
|
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+15 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*+30 [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Ghosts
*Has a [[Chat Guide: Miscellaneous|chat effect]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[oversized pizza cutter]]
||[[star spatula]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed utensil
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +13
|  
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +18
|-
|-
|[[Periodical Paintbrush]]
||[[toxic mop]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|None
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mus
|1-handed artsything
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*A prize item given to winners of the first calendar art contest
*Part of the [[Toxic Togs]]
*All Attributes +0-25%
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*Boost based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[plastic guitar]]
||[[vibrating cyborg knife]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mus
|2-handed guitar
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*<font color=red>3x</font> [[Fumble Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[prehistoric spear]]
||[[witty rapier]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mus
|1-handed throwing spear
|1-handed sword
|2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|
*+2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]] (Myst substat only)
|-
|-
|[[ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon]]
||[[world's smallest violin]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22.5|15-30
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=60|60 Mox
|3-handed ...weapon
|1-handed violin
|
|
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +5
*<font color=”red”>3x</font> [[Fumble Chance]]
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+5 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
|-
|[[roboduck-on-a-string]]
||[[batblade]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=22|15-29
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=57|57 Mus
|1-handed flail
|1-handed knife
|
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
||[[acoustic guitarrr]]
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mox
|2-handed guitar
|
* +8% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[scratch 'n' sniff crossbow]]
||[[armgun]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|None
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mox
|1-handed crossbow
|2-handed machine gun
|
|
*Actual power can vary with player level
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] + 10
*Enchantments can be added with [[Summon Stickers|stickers]]
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[scratch 'n' sniff sword]]
||[[black kettle drum]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|None
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mox
|1-handed sword
|2-handed drum
|
|
*Actual power can vary with player level
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*Enchantments can be added with [[Summon Stickers|stickers]]
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +30
|-
|-
|[[soylent staff]]
||[[carob cannon]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|2-handed staff
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +4
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[spiked femur]]
||[[crowbar]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
| +6 {{element|Spooky}}
|
* [[Combat Initiative]] +25%
|-
|-
|[[Spooky Putty ball]]
||[[frozen seal spine]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|None
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mus
|1-handed superball
|1-handed club
|
|
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*+20 {{element|Cold}}
*On critical, may ricochet up to three times, each doing 10-20 physical and 10 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[HP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 5-10 HP per adventure
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 5-10 MP per adventure
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[stinky cheese sword]]
||[[gatorskin umbrella]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|None
|data-sort-value=100|100 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed umbrella
|
|
*{{element|Stench}} based on number of adventures stunk up
*Serious {{element|Stench|Resistance}}
*May not be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[sugar shank]]
||[[ghost accordion]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|None
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mox
|1-handed knife
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +50%
*+5 Spooky Damage
*[[Passive Damage]] on critical
*+15% Booze Drops from Monsters
*Breaks after 30 combats
*Enables casting of 16-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[sugar shillelagh]]
||[[hairy staff]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|None
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 5-7 MP per Adventure
|-
||[[ram-battering staff]]
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|data-sort-value=52|52 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +50%
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*Breaks after 30 combats
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|-
|[[sugar shotgun]]
||[[rave whistle]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|None
|data-sort-value=52|52 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|1-handed whistle
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +50%
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +10
*[[Stunning]] on critical
*+10 [[Monster Level]]
*Breaks after 30 combats
|-
|-
|[[Super Magic Power Sword X]]
||[[ridiculously huge sword]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mus
|1-handed sword
|3-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +12
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[The Landscaper's leafblower]]
||[[silver cheese-slicer]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|35 Moxie
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mys
|2-handed leafblower
|1-handed utensil
| +1-25 [[Monster Level]] based on number of combats with leafblower equipped
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10%
|-
||[[silver paté knife]]
|data-sort-value=21|14-28
|data-sort-value=55|55 Mys
|1-handed utensil
| 
*+5% chance of [[Critical Spell Chance|Spell Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[time sword]]
||[[Spirit Precipice]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Time Trappings]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*+20% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[Tropical Crimbo Sword]]
||[[star boomerang]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=52|52 Mox
|1-handed sword
|1-handed boomerang
|
|
*Part of the [[Tropical Crimbo Duds]]
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[vampire duck-on-a-string]]
||[[star stiletto]]
|10-20
|data-sort-value=20.5|14-27
|35 Muscle
|data-sort-value=52|52 Mus
|1-handed flail
|1-handed knife
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|-
||[[autocalliope]]
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Prismatic Damage]] +2
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*Enables casting of 15-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[17-alarm Saucepan]]
||[[bad-ass club]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mus
|1-handed saucepan
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +11
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+15 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
*[[Sauceror|S]]' [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*Enables the casting of 15-turn Sauceror buffs
*Bonus for [[Sauceror|S]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Cerebral Crossbow]]
||[[bastard baster]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|30 Moxie
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mys
|1-handed crossbow
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*Part of the [[Encephalic Ensemble]]
*Spell Damage +20%
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[Chelonian Morningstar]]
||[[battery-powered drill]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|1-handed flail
|1-handed drill
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +11
*Spell Damage +100%
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*Maximum HP/MP +50
*[[Turtle Tamer|TT]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+10 to Monster Level
*Enables the casting of 15-turn TT buffs
*+10% Meat from Monsters
*Bonus for [[Turtle Tamer|TT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick]]
||[[beaver spear]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|30 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed spear
| +ceil([[Moons#Grimacite Equipment|Grimace darkness]]/2)% [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|[[grass whistle]]
|9-18
|35 Moxie
|1-handed whistle
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +6
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 4-6 MP per adventure
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[Greek Pasta of Peril]]
||[[crazy bastard sword]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +11
*An [[Ultra Rares|ultra-rare item]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +25%
*+6 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
*[[:Category:Food|Food]] [[Items from Monsters|Drops]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Pastamancer|P]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*Bonus for [[Pastamancer|P]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Hammer of Smiting]]
||[[curmudgel]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +16
*[[Monster Level]] +8
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
|-
|-
|[[huge spoon]]
||[[ga-ga radio]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|30 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|2-handed radio
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|-
|[[icy-hot katana]]
|9-18
|30 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[Hot and Cold Running Ninja Suit]]
*+1 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +20
|-
|-
|[[kneecapping stick]]
||[[Grimacite glaive]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|30 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|1-handed club
|3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|[[ninja mop]]
|9-18
|30 Muscle
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed polearm
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|
*A prize from [[The Raffle House]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +0-50% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[Shagadelic Disco Banjo]]
||[[hand-carved bokken]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|2-handed banjo
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +11
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5%
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*+7 damage to DB combat skills
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Disco Bandit|DB]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Squeezebox of the Ages]]
||[[hand-carved bow]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|2-handed bow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +11
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +15
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +10
*[[Accordion Thief|AT]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*Enables the casting of 15-turn AT buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[stainless steel shillelagh]]
||[[hand-carved staff]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|30 Muscle
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10%
*4x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*Slight [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance]] to All Elements (+1)
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Hardcore|HC]] reward
|-
|-
|[[vorpal blade]]
||[[hot cross bow]]
|9-18
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|30 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|1-handed sword
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*Part of the [[Yendorian Finery]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[ancient stone fist]]
||[[huge mosquito proboscis]]
|9-17
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|27 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed spear
|
|
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 2
*Regenerate 8-12 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] per adventure
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +20
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +20
|-
|-
|[[magic whistle]]
||[[kelp-holly gun]]
|9-17
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|27 Moxie
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed whistle
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*+4 [[Monster Level]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10
*+1 [[Familiar Weight]]
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +50%
*+25% [[Pickpocket]] Chance
|-
|-
|[[7-Foot Dwarven mattock]]
||[[leechknife]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mus
|2-handed axe
|1-handed knife
|
|
*Part of the [[Mining Gear]]
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +10
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +5
*Regenerate 4-6 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[lucky ball-and-chain]]
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mox
|2-handed flail
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[bubble bauble bow]]
||[[meatspout staff]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed bow
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*+15% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[clockwork crossbow]]
||[[oil pan]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=47|47 Mys
|1-handed crossbow
|1-handed saucepan
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +10
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10%
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*Enables the casting of 12-turn Sauceror buffs
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]] on [[Critical hit]]
|-
|-
|[[clockwork staff]]
||[[peppermint spine]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|25 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mys
|2-handed staff
|1-handed staff
|
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
* [[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
* +10% [[Critical Spell Chance]]
*[[MP Restorers|Restore]] 3-24 MP on [[Critical hit]]
|-
|-
|[[clockwork sword]]
||[[projectile icemaker]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|2-handed sword
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*[[HP Restorers|Restore]] 3-24 HP on [[Critical hit]]
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[corrupt club of corrupt corruption]]
||[[shuddersword]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed club
|2-handed sword
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +9
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
*Player loses 5 HP at end of combat
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[Crimbo ukulele]]
||[[smoldering staff]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19|13-25
|20 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed guitar
| +10% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|[[crowbarrr]]
|8-16
|25 Muscle
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*+11 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[flypaper staff]]
||[[staph of homophones]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+5 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventure(s)]] per day when equipped.
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[frigid hankyū]]
||[[sword behind inappropriate prepositions]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed bow
|2-handed sword
|
|
*+6 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*+5 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
|-
|-
|[[frozen nunchaku]]
||[[titanium assault umbrella]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=19.5|13-26
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mus
|2-handed flail
|1-handed umbrella
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
* Slight [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance to All Elements]]
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[goblin autoblowgun]]
||[[adobe adze]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|40 Mus
|2-handed blowgun
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +5
*+3 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*[[Adobe Adze Subscription|Subscribe]] for access to Premium Enchantments&trade;
|-
|-
|[[goblin hunting spear]]
||[[asbestos sword]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed spear
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*+15 Damage vs. Jungle Beasts
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
|-
|-
|[[grass blade]]
||[[bone and arrows]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|1-handed sword
|2-handed bow
|
|
*Part of the [[Grass Guise]]
* +30 Damage vs. Skeletons
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin melon baller]]
||[[bone crusher]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed club
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +8
|
*+30 Damage vs. Skeletons
|-
|-
|[[lead yo-yo]]
||[[buffalo blade]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed yo-yo
|2-handed sword
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[Meteoid ice beam]]
|8-16
|25 Moxie
|1-handed gun
|
|
*+20 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*+2% chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*On [[Critical hit|Critical]]: [[Stunning|Freeze Opponent]]
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[rib of the Bonerdagon]]
||[[carrot-on-a-stick]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|2-handed staff
|1-handed flail
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*Moxie +7
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*+50% Candy Drops from Monsters
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[rusty grave robbing shovel]]
||[[ceramic celery grater]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mys
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed weapon
|
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +20%
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-10%</font>
*+20% [[Critical Spell Chance|Chance of Spell Critical Hit]]
*Enables use of the [[Ceramic Grate]] skill in combat
|-
|-
|[[savory crossbow]]
||[[chrome crossbow]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed crossbow
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
|-
|-
|[[savory staff]]
||[[elevenderizing hammer]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=11|11 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed club
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +4
|
*All Attributes +11
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +11
|-
|-
|[[savory sword]]
||[[fiberglass foil]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
|
*Part of the [[Fiberglass Finery]]
*+3 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
*Deals damage and restores some MP at the beginning of each fight
|-
|-
|[[severed flipper]]
||[[flagstone flail]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed flail
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*+20% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +5
*Allows use of the [[Flagflog]] skill in combat
|-
|-
|[[spooky bicycle chain]]
||[[giant cheesestick]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed flail
|2-handed staff
|
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*2x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+11 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
|-
|-
|[[wholeberd]]
||[[gummi sword]]
|8-16
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|25 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|1-handed sword
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +6
|-
|[[can cannon]]
|8-15
|22 Moxie
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Muscle +7
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*+50% Candy Drops from Monsters
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
|-
|[[chopsticks]]
||[[half-melted spoon]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|23 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=42|42 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +12
*+10 Damage to Hot Spells
|-
|-
|[[elephant stinger]]
||[[Jacob's rung]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|22 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mys
|2-handed spear
|1-handed staff
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +15
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[pixel morning star]]
||[[lawnmower blade]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|22 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|1-handed whip
|2-handed sword
|All Attributes +5
|  
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
|-
|-
|[[squeaky staff]]
||[[linoleum staff]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|22 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Monster Level]] +6
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|-
|-
|[[sword of static]]
||[[lupine sword]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|22 Muscle
|data-sort-value=42|42 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*+9 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*+9 additional {{element|Spooky}} if a [[snarling wolf shield]] is equipped
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-4 MP per Adventure
|-
|-
|[[ultimate ultimate frisbee]]
||[[Mer-kin rollpin]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|22 Moxie
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed frisbee
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +25%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +4
*+75% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[wiffle-flail]]
||[[non-Euclidean non-accordion]]
|8-15
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|22 Muscle
|data-sort-value=42|42 Mox
|2-handed flail
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
*Enables casting of 15-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[double-barreled sling]]
||[[ocarina of space]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Moxie
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|1-handed sling
|2-handed flute
|
|
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*All Attributes +4
*Slight {{element|Cold|Resistance}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +5
*+2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
|-
|-
|[[25-meat staff]]
||[[old school Mafia knicke½æ]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=41|41 Mys
|2-handed staff
|1-handed sword
|&nbsp;
|  
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +27
|-
|-
|[[flaming cardboard sword]]
||[[petrified wood war pike]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
* +5 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fights]] per day when equipped
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
* Attack a second time when you attack
|-
|-
|[[flamingo mallet]]
||[[porcelain police baton]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*+4 to [[Monster Level]]
*Part of the [[Ceramic Suit]]
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Maximum MP +20
*Muscle +20%
*Your Smacks [[MP Restorers|Restore]] MP
|-
|-
|[[Frost™ brand sword]]
||[[potato pistol]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mox
|1-handed sword
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[hippy bongo]]
||[[ram stick]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|20 Moxie
|data-sort-value=42|42 Mus
|1-handed drum
|2-handed staff
| +5 {{element|Stench}}
|  
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|-
|[[homoerotic frat-paddle]]
||[[Red Roger's red right hand]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|  
*Part of the [[Frat Boy Ensemble]]
*+50 Physical Damage (in [[PirateRealm]] only)
*+4 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[Kentucky-fried meat crossbow]]
||[[Ruby Rod]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed rod
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|  
*Used in the [[Future]] quest
|-
|-
|[[Kentucky-fried meat staff]]
||[[serpentine sword]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=17.5|12-23
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=42|42 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed sword
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
|
*[[Monster Level]] +10
*[[Monster Level]] +10 more if wielded with a [[snake shield]]
|-
|-
|[[Kentucky-fried meat sword]]
||[[silver shrimp fork]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|20 Muscle
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mys
|2-handed sword
|1-handed utensil
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +14
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*Increased adventures and stats when eating [[pr0n cocktail]]s
|-
|-
|[[Totally Gay Claymore]]
||[[stained glass shiv]]
|7-14
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|19 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed sword
|1-handed knife
|A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[PhilANThropiSt]]
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +20%
*Serious {{element|Stench|Resistance}} (+3)
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[finger cymbals]]
||[[Sword of Dark Omens]]
|7-13
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|17 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed cymbals
|1-handed sword
|[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +20
|-
|[[grease gun]]
|7-13
|17 Moxie
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Prismatic Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
*All Attributes +5%
|-
|-
|[[repeating crossbow]]
||[[terra cotta tongs]]
|7-13
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|17 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mys
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*Part of the [[Terra Cotta Tackle]]
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+3 Mysticality [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*+5 [[Prismatic Damage]]
*Lets you [[Unleash Terra Cotta Army|unleash a terra cotta army]] on your foes
|-
|-
|[[BRICKO sword]]
||[[two-handed depthsword]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|None
|data-sort-value=45|45 Mus
|2-handed club
|2-handed sword
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[wrought-iron whisk]]
|data-sort-value=18|12-24
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*Part of the [[Wrought Wrappings]]
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
*Adds many additional balls to [[Salsaball]]
|-
||[[Accordion of Jordion]]
|data-sort-value=16|11-21
|data-sort-value=37|37 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*Part of the [[BRICKOfig Outfit]]
*+5% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +6
*+10% Meat from Monsters
*Enables casting of 14-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[bubblewrap crossbow]]
||[[asbestos crossbow]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|-
||[[bone flute]]
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed flute
| 
*+11 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[bubblewrap staff]]
||[[chrome staff]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
|-
|-
|[[bubblewrap sword]]
||[[ghostly dagger]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed knife
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*Slight Resistance to All [[Elemental Resistance|Elements]] (+1)
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 11
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] -10
|-
|-
|[[cardboard crossbow]]
||[[haunted paddle-ball]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed flail
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*+5 to [[Monster Level]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+10 Spooky Damage
|-
|-
|[[cardboard staff]]
||[[hawk]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed saw
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*+5% Chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +11
*+22% Damage vs. Skeletons
|-
|-
|[[cardboard sword]]
||[[iron pasta spoon]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|-
||[[linoleum sword]]
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|-
||[[machetito]]
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +9
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
|-
|[[dense meat crossbow]]
||[[mannequin leg]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|2-handed crossbow
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
|-
|[[dense meat staff]]
|6-12
|15 Muscle
|2-handed staff
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
|-
|[[dense meat sword]]
|6-12
|15 Muscle
|2-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
|[[diamond-studded cane]]
|6-12
|15 Muscle
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*+20 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
|-
|[[eXtreme meat crossbow]]
||[[sack of doorknobs]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed sack
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[eXtreme meat staff]]
||[[wicker sticker]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=16.5|11-22
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|1-handed knife
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
|
|-
*Part of [[Wicker Wear]]
|[[eXtreme meat sword]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20%
|6-12
*+4 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped.
|15 Muscle
*Is a sweet, sweet knife
|2-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
|-
|-
|[[filthy pestle]]
||[[ancient Elf dessert spoon]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed utensil
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|
|-
*+20 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
|[[flaming crutch]]
*+20 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
|6-12
*+20 Damage to {{element|Spooky|Spells}}
|15 Muscle
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
|1-handed club
*+20 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
| +3 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
|-
|-
|[[glistening staff]]
||[[asbestos staff]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|-
|[[Gnollish autoplunger]]
||[[bamboo bokuto]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|3-handed spear
|1-handed sword
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[knob bugle]]
||[[barrel gun]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed horn
|1-handed pistol
|[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25%
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin elite polearm]]
||[[big stirring stick]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed staff
|
|
*Part of the [[Knob Goblin Elite Guard Uniform]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[muculent machete]]
||[[Bonestabber]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
*Serious Spooky [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance]] (+3)
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+10 Spooky Damage
*+5 to [[Monster Level]]
*+30% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Skeletons
|-
|-
|[[pair of bolt cutters]]
||[[bottle-rocket crossbow]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|1-handed crossbow
|[[Monster Level|Delevels]] on hit
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*+15% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*Shoots [[Bottle-rocket crossbow#Notes|bottle-rockets]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[ratarang]]
||[[bounty-hunting rifle]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed boomerang
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +7
*Part of the [[Bounty-Hunting Rig]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*+15% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*[[Pickpocket|Pickpocketed item]]
|-
|-
|[[sabre teeth]]
||[[bow staff]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed knife
|2-handed staff
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +4
|
*Part of the [[Bow Tux]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
|-
|[[slightly peevedbow]]
||[[can of fake snow]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|2-handed bow
|1-handed can
|&nbsp;
|
*Part of the [[Arboreal Raiment]]
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[styrofoam crossbow]]
||[[candlestick]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed wand
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*+2 Mysticality [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stat(s) Per Fight]]
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +100%
*This item will disappear at the end of the day
|-
|-
|[[styrofoam staff]]
||[[chocolate cow bone]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*+30% Candy Drops from Monsters
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*Candilicious Smacks!
|-
|-
|[[styrofoam sword]]
||[[chrome sword]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
|-
|-
|[[wooden axe]]
||[[Crimbo sword]]
|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|15 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed axe
|2-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
|[[boxing glove on a spring]]
|6-11
|12 Moxie
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Part of the [[Crimbo Duds]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +4
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
|-
|-
|[[infernal fife]]
||[[Crimbomination Contraption]]
|6-11
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|12 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed flute
|2-handed club
| +7 {{element|Hot}}
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[poutine pole]]
||[[Crimbuccaneer tavern swab]]
|6-11
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|12 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*All Attributes +25%
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+20 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+20 {{element|Stench}}
*Helps clean up [[The Bar At War]]
|-
|-
|[[5-Alarm Saucepan]]
||[[depleted Grimacite hammer]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed saucepan
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Monster Level]] +0-25 based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*[[Sauceror|S]]' [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Needed for depleted Grimacite smithing
*Enables the casting of 10-turn Sauceror buffs (all classes)
*Bonus for [[Sauceror|S]]s only
|-
|-
|[[astral bludgeon]]
||[[duck-on-a-string]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed club
|1-handed flail
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +25%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[astral longbow]]
||[[Elf Guard broom]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed bow
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +25%
*All Attributes +25%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
*Successful hit [[Deleveling|weakens]] opponent
*+30% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*Helps clean up [[The Bar At War]]
|-
|-
|[[astral mace]]
||[[elf ploughshare]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +25%
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +30
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*+5 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
|-
|-
|[[astral pistol]]
||[[elven tambourine]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|1-handed rattle
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +25%
*So-So Resistance to All [[Elemental Resistance|Elements]] (+2)
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
*+5 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
|-
|-
|[[Ax of L'rose]]
||[[exclusive club]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed axe
|1-handed club
|&nbsp;
|
*It's very exclusive!
|-
||[[elven whittling knife]]
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed knife
|  
*Does extra damage on criticals
|-
|-
|[[balloon sword]]
||[[flaming juggler's balls]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed euphemisms
|
|
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] <font color=”red”>-2</font>
*+2 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[blammer]]
||[[Frankly Mr. Shank]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed knife
|
|
*3x chance of Critical Hit
*Disco Bandit Combat Skills weaken enemies by an additional 25%
*Successful hit weakens opponent.
*+5 Smithsness
*Moxie +X%
**X based on Smithsness
*Bonus for Disco Bandits only
|-
|-
|[[blunt icepick]]
||[[giant candy cane]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|
|
|1-handed club
*+40% [[Items from Monsters|Candy from Monsters]]
|
*+15 Cold Damage
|-
|-
|[[Bjorn's Hammer]]
||[[gilded trumpet]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed horn
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +5
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*+3 Moxie [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
|-
|-
|[[can of maces]]
||[[goulauncher]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed club
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +2
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
*Slight {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[cheap plastic kazoo]]
||[[haiku katana]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed kazoo
|1-handed sword
| +10 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
|[[clock-cleaning hammer]]
|5-10
|
|
|1-handed club
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
|Weapon Damage +20
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*Allows use of [[The 17 Cuts]], [[Falling Leaf Whirlwind]], [[Spring Raindrop Attack]], [[Summer Siesta]], [[Winter's Bite Technique]] in combat
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[Disco Banjo]]
||[[Hand that Rocks the Ladle]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed banjo
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Prismatic Damage]] +5
*+3 damage to DB combat skills
*+5 [[Smithsness]]
*[[Disco Bandit|DB]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +X%
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
*Eminently Twistable (PM only)
|-
|-
|[[dripping meat crossbow]]
||[[ice nine]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed pistol
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
|
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*Regenerate 10-20 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*+30% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+5 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped.
|-
|-
|[[dripping meat staff]]
||[[ice sickle]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|1-handed knife
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
|-
|[[dripping meat sword]]
|5-10
|10 Muscle
|1-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|-
|[[fluorescent lightbulb]]
|5-10
|
|
|1-handed club
*[[Monster Level]] +15
|Maximum MP +30
*+5 {{element|Cold}}
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[gift-a-pult]]
||[[iFlail]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|2-handed giftapult
|1-handed flail
|Allows hurling of Gift Items
|-
|[[glow-in-the-dark dart gun]]
|5-10
|None
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +([[Moons|9 - light]])
*+11 to [[Monster Level]]
*+2x ([[Moons|9 - light]]) [[Bonus Ranged Damage]]
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*Super Accurate!
*[[Combat Frequency|Monsters will be less attracted to you]].
|-
|-
|[[Hammerus]]
||[[infernal toilet brush]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*+15 Spooky Damage
*+20 {{element|Stench}}
|-
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +20
|[[inflatable baseball bat]]
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +20
|5-10
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|None
|2-handed club
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin deluxe scimitar]]
||[[kiwi beak]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|
*+25% [[Items from Monsters|Food Drops from Monsters]]
*+25% [[Items from Monsters|Booze Drops from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[Mace of the Tortoise]]
||[[knife]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed mace
|1-handed knife
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*+50% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*[[Turtle Tamer|TT]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +100%
*Enables the casting of 10-turn TT buffs (all classes)
*Item disappears at the end of the day
*Bonus for [[Turtle Tamer|TT]]s only
|-
||[[The Landscaper's leafblower]]
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|2-handed leafblower
| 
*+1-25 [[Monster Level]] based on number of combats with leafblower equipped
|-
|-
|[[office-supply crossbow]]
||[[lead pipe]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed crossbow
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +50
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +3
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +100%
|-
|-
|[[Pasta of Peril]]
||[[lightning rod]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +50
*[[Pastamancer|P]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 5-10 MP per adventure
*Bonus for [[Pastamancer|P]]s only
*Disappears at the end of day
|-
|-
|[[pestoblade]]
||[[linoleum crossbow]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed sword
|2-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|-
|-
|[[pixel boomerang]]
||[[Loathing Legion chainsaw]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed boomerang
|2-handed chainsaw
| +5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|[[pixel chain whip]]
|5-10
|10 Muscle
|1-handed whip
|All Attributes +4
|-
|[[pixel sword]]
|5-10
|10 Muscle
|1-handed sword
|
|
*Part of the [[8-Bit Finery]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*Successful hit [[Monster Level|weakens opponent]]
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[poison pen]]
||[[Loathing Legion double prism]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|1-handed prism
|75% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
*+2 {{element|Stench}}
*+2 {{element|Hot}}
*+2 {{element|Cold}}
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[pottery club]]
||[[Loathing Legion flamethrower]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|2-handed flamethrower
| +5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|[[pottery yo-yo]]
|5-10
|None
|1-handed yo-yo
| +5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|[[Red Rover BB gun]]
|5-10
|10 Moxie
|2-handed gun
|
|
*3x [[Critical Hit Chance]]
*+20 {{element|Hot}}
*On critical, either puts out your eye (All Attributes <font color=”red”>-10%</font>) or your opponent's
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[Rock and Roll Legend]]
||[[Loathing Legion hammer]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|1-handed hammer
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Loathing Legion hammer#Notes|Gets the job done]]
*[[Accordion Thief|AT]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Cannot be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
*Enables the casting of 10-turn AT buffs (all classes)
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[sucker tachi]]
||[[macroplane grater]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
|
|1-handed weapon
*Spell Damage +10%
|Weapon Damage +10
|-
|-
|[[tambourine]]
||[[madius]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Moxie
|data-sort-value=36|36 Mus
|1-handed drum
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +20
*Part of the [[Gladiatorial Glad Rags]]
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +20
*+7 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
|-
|[[Unionize The Elves sign]]
||[[Mafia violin case]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*Prize from the Penguin Mafia [[Mystery Raffle Ticket|Mystery Raffle]]
*No longer drops
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
|-
|-
|[[worm-riding hooks]]
||[[massive wrench]]
|5-10
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|2-handed club
|&nbsp;
|
*+10 [[Elf Warfare Effectiveness]]
*+20% [[Critical Hit Chance|Change of Critical Hit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
|-
|-
|[[basic meat spork]]
||[[Meat Tenderizer is Murder]]
|5-9
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|7 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+5 [[Smithsness]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +X%
*(+% to Muscle Based on [[Smithsness]])
*25% chance to gain an extra gallon of Fury when you gain a gallon of Fury.
*(SC only)
|-
|-
|[[curdflinger]]
||[[Moonthril Flamberge]]
|5-9
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|7 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mus
|1-handed crossbow
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Part of the [[Luniform]]
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +0-75% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[calavera concertina]]
||[[Moonthril Longbow]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Moxie
|data-sort-value=40|40 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|2-handed bow
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Part of the [[Luniform]]
*Enables the casting of 7-turn AT buffs (all classes)
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +0-75% based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
|-
|-
|[[corrupt club of corruption]]
||[[origami riding crop]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed crop
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*Player loses 3 HP at end of combat
*Has a [[Chat Guide: Miscellaneous|chat effect]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
||[[oversized pizza cutter]]
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +13
|-
|-
|[[dreadlock whip]]
||[[papier-mâchéte]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed sword
|
|
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Weapon Damage +10
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*All Attributes +15%
*[[Monster Level]] +10
*Makes actions more exciting
|-
|-
|[[dueling banjo]]
||[[papier-mâchine gun]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Moxie
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|2-handed banjo
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +10
*+5 [[Monster Level]]
*All Attributes +15%
*Makes actions more exciting
|-
|-
|[[half-sized guitar]]
||[[peppermint harpoon gun]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed guitar
|2-handed bazooka
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*+100 [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Physical Damage]] (Underwater Only)
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +4
|-
|-
|[[ironic battle spoon]]
||[[Periodical Paintbrush]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed artsything
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|
*A prize item given to winners of the first calendar art contest
*All Attributes +0-25%
*Boost based on Grimace [[moons#Grimacite Equipment|darkness]]
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[pool cue]]
||[[plastic guitar]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|2-handed staff
|2-handed guitar
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
|-
|-
|[[rubber axe]]
||[[plastic nunchaku]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|2-handed axe
|2-handed flail
| +2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|
*+3 [[Prismatic Damage]]
*+30% [[Combat Initiative]]
|-
|-
|[[starchy crossbow]]
||[[prehistoric spear]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Moxie
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed crossbow
|1-handed throwing spear
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
|  
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[starchy staff]]
||[[Rain-Doh violet bo]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
|
*+11 Sleaze Damage
*Moxie +11
|-
|-
|[[starchy sword]]
||[[Rain-Doh yellow laser gun]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed pistol
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|
*Successful hit weakens opponent.
*Super Accurate!
|-
|-
|[[suede shortsword]]
||[[reindeer hammer]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed club
|&nbsp;
|
*All Attributes +10
|-
|-
|[[white sword]]
||[[reindeer sickle]]
|4-8
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed claw
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|
*Successful hit causes bleeding.
|-
|-
|[[big bass drum]]
||[[revolver]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed drum
|1-handed pistol
|
|
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +20
*+2 Moxie [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stat(s) Per Fight]]
*[[Damage Absorption]] +8
*[[Combat Initiative]] +50%
|-
|-
|[[Dr. Hobo's scalpel]]
||[[ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed knife
|3-handed ...weapon
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+1 {{element|Stench}}
*<font color=red>3x</font> [[Fumble Chance]]
|-
|-
|[[Gnollish flyswatter]]
||[[right bear arm]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|&nbsp;
|
*+10% Muscle
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30%
*Lets you act like a bear
|-
|-
|[[Gnollish plunger]]
||[[roboduck-on-a-string]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed spear
|1-handed flail
|&nbsp;
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[jack flapper]]
||[[rusted-out shootin' iron]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed club
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
|
*+10% Meat from Monsters
*Ranged Damage +50
*Monsters will be less attracted to you.
|-
|-
|[[pocket theremin]]
||[[Saucepanic]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed theremin
|1-handed saucepan
| +4 {{element|Spooky}}
|
*+2 Mysticality Stat(s) Per Fight
*+5 [[Smithsness]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +X%
*(+% to Mysticality Based on [[Smithsness]])
*Lets you gather more Soulsauce
*Enables the casting of 15-turn Sauceror buffs
*(Bonus for Saucerors only)
|-
|-
|[[sealhide whip]]
||[[scratch 'n' sniff crossbow]]
|4-7
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|2 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|1-handed crossbow
| +25 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|[[spooky staff]]
|4-7
|2 Muscle
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*Actual power can vary with player level
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
*Enchantments can be added with [[Summon Stickers|stickers]]
|-
|-
|[[bat whip]]
||[[scratch 'n' sniff sword]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*Actual power can vary with player level
*[[Monster Level]] +5
*Enchantments can be added with [[Summon Stickers|stickers]]
|-
|-
|[[bone rattle]]
||[[sewage-clogged pistol]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed rattle
|1-handed pistol
| +4 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|[[cardboard katana]]
|3-6
|None
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20 more if [[Double-Fisted Skull Smashing|dual-wielded]] with a [[cardboard wakizashi]]
*+20 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[cardboard wakizashi]]
||[[Shakespeare's Sister's Accordion]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Damage Reduction]]: +2
*-1 MP to use Skills
*gives the [[cardboard katana]] 20 more [[Bonus Weapon Damage]] when [[Double-Fisted Skull Smashing|dual-wielded]]
*+5 [[Smithsness]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +X%
*(+% to Moxie Based on [[Smithsness]])
*Has a cool Cadenza
*Enables casting of 15-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[cheap plastic bottle opener]]
||[[sharpened spoon]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed knife
| +2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|&nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife]]
||[[Sheila Take a Crossbow]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|1-handed crossbow
|[[MP Restorers|Restore]] 0-2 MP on successful hit
|
*Regenerate 1-2 HP and MP per adventure
*+5% [[Pickpocket]] Chance
*+5 Smithsness
*Combat Initiative +X%
*(+Initiative based on Smithsness)"
|-
|-
|[[electric crutch]]
||[[silent pea shooter]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed staff
|1-handed slingshot
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +30
|
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+5 [[Monster Level]]
|-
|-
|[[evil paper umbrella]]
||[[Sneaky Pete's basket]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed umbrella
|1-handed basket
| +1 [[Monster Level]]
|
*Quest item in an AoSP run*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[grave robbing shovel]]
||[[snow shovel]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|2-handed polearm
|
|
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*All Attributes +10
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=”red”>-10%</font>
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100%
|-
|-
|[[halfberd]]
||[[soul knife]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed polearm
|1-handed knife
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +2
| Can harm True Mimes
|-
|-
|[[huge mirror shard]]
||[[soylent staff]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed knife
|2-handed staff
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +4
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin spatula]]
||[[space heater]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed pistol
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +4
|
*+12 Hot Damage
*So-So Cold Resistance (+2)
|-
|-
|[[little paper umbrella]]
||[[space needle]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed umbrella
|1-handed sword
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +1
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*So-So Spooky [[Elemental Resistance|Resistance]] (+2)
|-
|-
|[[obsidian dagger]]
||[[Space Tourist Phaser]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|10 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed knife
|1-handed pistol
|
|  
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*This Phaser is set to Fun
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[out-of-tune biwa]]
||[[spant spear]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|2-handed guitar
|1-handed spear
|[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] +2
|  
* All Attributes +10%
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25%
|-
|-
|[[parasitic claw]]
||[[spiked femur]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
| 
*+6 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[Spooky Putty ball]]
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed superball
|
|
*Part of the [[Mutant Couture]]
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +player level (capped at 15), or 2x player level with [[Yuletide Mutations]]
*On critical, may ricochet up to three times, each doing 10-20 physical and 10 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[portable corkscrew]]
||[[Staff of Ed (Actually Ed the Undying)]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed staff
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*Quest item
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
*Mysticality +25%
*Spell Damage +25%
*Regenerate 2-6 MP per adventure
*+5 Pool Skill
|-
|-
|[[rattail whip]]
||[[Staff of Fats]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mys
|1-handed whip
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*+5 Pool Skill
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
|-
|[[shiny butcherknife]]
||[[Staff of Fats (Actually Ed the Undying)]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
|-
|[[skeleton bone]]
|3-6
|None
|1-handed club
| +1 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|[[spooky stick]]
|3-6
|None
|2-handed staff
|2-handed staff
| +2 {{element|Spooky}}
|
*+5 Pool Skill
|-
|-
|[[spork]]
||[[steel sword]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +15
*Regenerate 2-4 HP per adventure
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
|-
|[[tail o' nine cats]]
||[[stinky cheese sword]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*{{element|Stench}} based on number of adventures stunk up
*[[Monster Level]] +5
*May not be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[third-hand nunchaku]]
||[[sugar shank]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|7 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed flail
|1-handed knife
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*[[Passive Damage]] on critical
*Breaks after 30 combats
|-
|-
|[[throwing wrench]]
||[[sugar shillelagh]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|2-handed club
|[[Monster Level|Delevels]] on hit
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*Breaks after 30 combats
|-
|-
|[[trusty torch]]
||[[sugar shotgun]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|1-handed pistol
| +3 {{element|Hot}}
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +50%
*[[Stunning]] on critical
*Breaks after 30 combats
|-
|-
|[[Wand of Nagamar]]
||[[Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword]]
|3-6
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed wand
|2-handed sword
|&nbsp;
|
* [[Prismatic Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[cheap plastic blowgun]]
||[[Super Magic Power Sword X]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed blowgun
|1-handed sword
|50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[eggbeater]]
||[[Thor's Pliers]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed pliers
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +2
|
*+4 [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stat(s) Per Fight]]
*Lets You Smith and Make Jewelry Faster
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 6-9 MP per adventure
*+20% [[Pickpocket]] Chance
*Regular Attacks Can't Miss
*Allows You to Ply Reality
*Regenerates Lightning Power
*(in [[Heavy Rains]] only)
|-
|-
|[[Gnollish slotted spoon]]
||[[time sword]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed sword
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
|
*Part of the [[Time Trappings]]
*+3 [[Extra Rollover Adventures]]
|-
|-
|[[palm-frond whip]]
||[[tin drum]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|2-handed drum
|
|
*Part of the [[Palmist Paraphernalia]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*[[Prismatic Damage]] +3
*Can break in combat
*+1 Moxie Stat(s) Per Fight
|-
|-
|[[stone banjo]]
||[[tin foil]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed banjo
|1-handed sword
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
*+1 Muscle Stat(s) Per Fight
|-
|-
|[[wooden stakes]]
||[[Tropical Crimbo Sword]]
|3-5
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed spear
|1-handed sword
|[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +1
|
*Part of the [[Tropical Crimbo Duds]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[basic meat crossbow]]
||[[Trusty]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Moxie
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed crossbow
|2-handed axe
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|
*Quest item in AoB run
|-
|-
|[[basic meat staff]]
||[[vampire duck-on-a-string]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mus
|2-handed staff
|1-handed flail
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +1
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[basic meat sword]]
||[[whalegun]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|5 Muscle
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed sword
|2-handed rifle
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +1
|
*+10 [[Pirate Warfare Effectiveness]]
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +100
|-
||[[Work is a Four Letter Sword]]
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*Regenerate 4-6 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] per adventure
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+5 [[Smithsness]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +X
*(+Damage based on [[Smithsness]])
|-
|-
|[[bonerang]]
||[[wrench]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=15|10-20
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed boomerang
|1-handed utensil
| +10 Damage vs. Skeletons
|
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +50
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +100%
*Item will disappear at the end of the day
|-
|-
|[[boning knife]]
||[[17-alarm Saucepan]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed knife
|1-handed saucepan
| +10 Damage vs. Skeletons
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +11
*+15 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*[[Sauceror|S]]' [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Enables the casting of 15-turn Sauceror buffs
*Bonus for [[Sauceror|S]]s only
|-
|-
|[[club of corruption]]
||[[ancient stone fist]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=27|27 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|
|
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 2
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +3
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +20
*Player loses 1 HP at end of combat
|-
|-
|[[corn holder]]
||[[anger blaster]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed forearm replacement
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +1
|  
*+10 {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[dented harmonica]]
||[[broken sword]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=27|27 Mus
|1-handed horn
|1-handed sword
|[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +1
|
*Slight {{element|Spooky|Resistance}}
|-
|-
|[[dishrag]]
||[[Cerebral Crossbow]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed whip
|1-handed crossbow
| +3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|[[fouet de tortue-dressage]]
|2-4
|None
|1-handed whip
|
|
*+10 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*Part of the [[Encephalic Ensemble]]
*+10 to Familiar Damage
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[gnauga hide whip]]
||[[Chelonian Morningstar]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed flail
|
|
*Part of the [[Gnauga Hides]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +11
*+3% [[Items from Monsters]]
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*[[Turtle Tamer|TT]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Enables the casting of 15-turn TT buffs
*Bonus for [[Turtle Tamer|TT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[Gnollish pie server]]
||[[debonair deboner]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed club
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10
*+25% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Skeletons
|-
|-
|[[hippo whip]]
||[[depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed club
|[[Monster Level]] +10
| 
*+ceil([[Moons#Grimacite Equipment|Grimace darkness]]/2)% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin tongs]]
||[[doubt cannon]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed forearm replacement
|[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +2
|
*Successful hit weakens opponent
*Grants skill [[Doubt Shackles]]
|-
|-
|[[penguin whip]]
||[[elegant nightstick]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed club
| +3% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|
*Maximum HP +30
*Maximum MP +15
|-
|-
|[[scorpion whip]]
||[[fear condenser]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed whip
|1-handed forearm replacement
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +13
*+10 Spooky Damage
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*Grants skill [[Fear Vapor]]
|-
|-
|[[slingshot]]
||[[foot-long hot daub]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=27|27 Mus
|2-handed slingshot
|2-handed club
|&nbsp;
|
*Part of the [[Hot Daub Ensemble]]
*+9 {{element|Hot}}
*+9 Damage to Hot Spells
|-
|-
|[[sweet ninja sword]]
||[[grass whistle]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=35|35 Mox
|1-handed sword
|1-handed whistle
|&nbsp;
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +6
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 4-6 MP per adventure
|-
|-
|[[tiny ninja sword]]
||[[Greek Pasta Spoon of Peril]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed sword
|1-handed utensil
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +11
*[[Combat Initiative]] +25%
*[[:Category:Food|Food]] [[Items from Monsters|Drops]] +10%
*[[Pastamancer|P]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Pastamancer|P]]s only
|-
|-
|[[yak whip]]
||[[Hammer of Smiting]]
|2-4
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed club
|[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +16
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
|-
|-
|[[asparagus knife]]
||[[huge spoon]]
|2-3
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mys
|1-handed knife
|1-handed utensil
| +1 {{element|Stench}}
|  
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|-
|-
|[[Knob Goblin scimitar]]
||[[icy-hot katana]]
|2-3
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed sword
|2-handed sword
|[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +1
|
*Part of the [[Hot and Cold Running Ninja Suit]]
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[soup-chucks]]
||[[kneecapping stick]]
|2-3
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|2-handed flail
|1-handed club
| +2 {{element|Hot}}
|  
*+8% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[wumpus-hair whip]]
||[[magic whistle]]
|2-3
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=27|27 Mox
|1-handed whip
|1-handed whistle
|
|
*Part of the [[Wumpus-Hair Wardrobe]]
*+4 [[Monster Level]]
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
*+1 [[Familiar Weight]]
*+2 {{element|Stench}}
|-
*+2 {{element|Hot}}
||[[ninja mop]]
*+2 {{element|Cold}}
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|-
|-
|[[bar whip]]
||[[pentatonic accordion]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed whip
|2-handed accordion
| +2 to [[Familiar Weight]]
|
*+9 {{element|Cold}}
*Enables casting of 12-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[big stick]]
||[[plasma rifle]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|1-handed rifle
|&nbsp;
|
*Quest item
*Ranged Damage +20
|-
|-
|[[bucket of anniversary lard]]
||[[regret hose]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13|9-17
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mox
|1-handed flail
|1-handed forearm replacement
|All Attributes +1
|
*Grants skill [[Tear Wave]]
*+10 {{element|Cold}}
|-
|-
|[[candy knuckles]]
||[[Shagadelic Disco Banjo]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|1-handed knuckles
|2-handed banjo
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +25
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +11
*Breaks after 31 combats
*+10% [[Meat from Monsters]]
*+7 damage to DB combat skills
*[[Disco Bandit|DB]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
|-
|-
|[[can-you-dig-it?]]
||[[Squeezebox of the Ages]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|1-handed spade
|2-handed accordion
| +???
|
|-
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +11
|[[chisel]]
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +15
|1-2
*[[Accordion Thief|AT]]'s [[Legendary Epic Weapon]]
|None
*Enables the casting of 15-turn AT buffs
|1-handed knife
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|&nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[clown hammer]]
||[[stainless steel shillelagh]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed club
|1-handed club
|Squeaky!
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +15%
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Hardcore|HC]] reward
|-
|-
|[[clown whip]]
||[[vorpal blade]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=13.5|9-18
|None
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed whip
|So-So {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
|-
|[[cool whip]]
|1-2
|None
|1-handed whip
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[costume sword]]
|1-2
|None
|1-handed sword
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] <font color=”red”>-10</font>
*Part of the [[Yendorian Finery]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +30%
*+8% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
|-
|[[demon whip]]
||[[4-dimensional guitar]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mox
|1-handed whip
|2-handed guitar
|
|
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +5
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[disco ball]]
||[[7-Foot Dwarven mattock]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed disco ball
|2-handed axe
|&nbsp;
|
*Part of the [[Mining Gear]]
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|-
|-
|[[KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat]]
||[[boilgun]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|2-handed club
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +10
*+8 {{element|Hot}}
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +10
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +10
*[[HP Restorers|Regenerate]] 1-3 HP per adventure
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 1-3 MP per adventure
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[live wire]]
||[[bone bandoneon]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed whip
|2-handed accordion
|
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] +3
*+7 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per adventure
*Enables casting of 6-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
|-
|[[pasta spoon]]
||[[broken beer bottle]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed utensil
|1-handed knife
|&nbsp;
|  
|-
|-
|[[pixel whip]]
||[[bubble bauble bow]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed whip
|2-handed bow
|All Attributes +3
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
|-
|[[saucepan]]
||[[can cannon]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mox
|1-handed saucepan
|2-handed crossbow
|Enables the casting of 5-turn Sauceror buffs (all classes)
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
|-
|[[seal-clubbing club]]
||[[candy stick]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mys
|1-handed club
|1-handed staff
|&nbsp;
|
*Spell Damage +50%
*+40% Candy Drops from Monsters
|-
|-
|[[Spooky Putty snake]]
||[[chopsticks]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=23|23 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +50%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Spooky|Spells}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +12
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 6-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do 25% of the enemy's remaining HP in {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of Blood and Pudding]]
||[[clockwork crossbow]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed crossbow
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +25%
*+7% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[HP Increasers|Maximum HP]] +15
*[[Monster Level|Weakens Monster]] on [[Critical hit]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to steal and [[HP Restorers|restore HP]]
|-
|-
|[[Staff of Queso Escusado]]
||[[clockwork staff]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +50%
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Restore]] 3-24 MP on [[Critical hit]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 6-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Stench}}
*May not be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Black Kettle]]
||[[clockwork sword]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|75 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed sword
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +75%
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10
*[[HP Restorers|Restore]] 3-24 HP on [[Critical hit]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-6 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Deepest Freeze]]
||[[corrupt club of corrupt corruption]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|200 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed club
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +9
*+30 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
*Player loses 5 HP at end of combat
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 20-30 MP per Adventure
|-
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Cold}}
||[[Crimbo ukulele]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|2-handed guitar
| 
*+10% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
||[[crowbarrr]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|2-handed staff
|  
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Grand Flambé]]
||[[crystalline reamer]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|125 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*Spell Damage +10
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*Superhuman {{element|Cold|Resistance}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Greasefire]]
||[[elephant stinger]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|20 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed spear
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +35%
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 3-4 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Hot}} and {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Grease Trap]]
||[[flypaper staff]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|125 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed staff
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+20 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Kitchen Floor]]
||[[frigid hankyū]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|125 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed bow
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*+6 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Midnight Snack]]
||[[frozen nunchaku]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed flail
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Spooky|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the November Jack-O-Lantern]]
||[[giant spider leg]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed club
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*+10 {{element|Sleaze}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*+10% Chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*+10 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Stench}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Short Order Cook]]
||[[goblin autoblowgun]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|15 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed blowgun
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Soupbone]]
||[[goblin hunting spear]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|75 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed spear
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +75%
*+15 Damage vs. Jungle Beasts
*[[MP Increasers|Maximum MP]] +15
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-6 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Spooky}}
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Teapot Tempest]]
||[[grass blade]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|25 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed sword
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*Part of the [[Grass Guise]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +25%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 3-4 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Walk-In Freezer]]
||[[Knob Goblin melon baller]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|125 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed utensil
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +8
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
|-
*+20 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
||[[lead yo-yo]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Cold}}
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed yo-yo
| &nbsp;
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Well-Tempered Cauldron]]
||[[logging hatchet]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|125 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|1-handed chefstaff
|1-handed axe
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
|-
||[[Meteoid ice beam]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|1-handed gun
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*+20 {{element|Cold}}
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +125%
*+2% chance of [[Critical Hit Chance|Critical Hit]]
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*On [[Critical hit|Critical]]: [[Stunning|Freeze Opponent]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 7-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
|-
|[[Staff of the Woodfire]]
||[[piratical blunderbuss]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|150 Mysticality
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|2-handed rifle
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*+5 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +100%
*+30% [[Items from Monsters|Booze Drops from Monsters]]
*+10 Mysticality [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-15 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Spooky}} and {{element|Hot}}
|-
|-
|[[stolen accordion]]
||[[pitchfork]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|2-handed accordion
|1-handed spear
|Enables the casting of 5-turn AT buffs (all classes)
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +7
|-
|-
|[[stuffed crazy bastard sword]]
||[[pixel morning star]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|1-handed sword
|1-handed whip
|&nbsp;
|-
|[[The Necbromancer's Wizard Staff]]
|1-2
|200 Mysticality
|1-handed chefstaff
|
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a [[Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
* All Attributes +5
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*+30 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 20-30 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Sleaze}} and delevel
|-
|-
|[[tiny plastic sword]]
||[[quantum disintegrator pistol]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mox
|1-handed sword
|1-handed pistol
|[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|  
*+15% [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Damage]] vs. Bugbears
|-
|-
|[[turtle totem]]
||[[rib of the Bonerdagon]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|None
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed totem
|2-handed staff
|&nbsp;
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +15
*Must have any [[Monster Aggravation Devices|monster aggravation device]] set to 5 to acquire
|-
||[[rusty grave robbing shovel]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-10%</font>
|-
||[[savory crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
|-
||[[savory staff]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +4
|-
||[[savory sword]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +4
|-
||[[severed flipper]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
||[[spooky bicycle chain]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed flail
|
*+5 {{element|Spooky}}
*+5% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
||[[squeaky staff]]
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +6
|-
|-
|[[white whip]]
||[[sword of static]]
|1-2
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|None
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 2-4 MP per Adventure
|-
||[[swordzall]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*Weapon Damage +8
*Maximum MP +10
|-
||[[ultimate ultimate frisbee]]
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mox
|1-handed frisbee
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +4
|-
||[[wholeberd]]
|data-sort-value=12|8-16
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +6
|-
||[[wiffle-flail]]
|data-sort-value=11.5|8-15
|data-sort-value=22|22 Mus
|2-handed flail
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
*[[Combat Initiative]] +20%
|-
||[[25-meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|2-handed staff
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[accord ion]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|1-handed accordion
|
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[double-barreled sling]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|1-handed sling
|
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*Slight {{element|Cold|Resistance}}
|-
||[[finger cymbals]]
|data-sort-value=10|7-13
|data-sort-value=17|17 Mox
|1-handed cymbals
|
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +20
|-
||[[flaming cardboard sword]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[flamingo mallet]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|2-handed club
|
*+4 to [[Monster Level]]
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[Frost™ brand sword]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +3
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
|-
||[[gnawed-up dog bone]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*+5 to Familiar Weight
*+1 Familiar Experience Per Combat
|-
||[[grease gun]]
|data-sort-value=10|7-13
|data-sort-value=17|17 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[hippy bongo]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|1-handed drum
| 
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[Kentucky-fried meat crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
||[[Kentucky-fried meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
|-
||[[Kentucky-fried meat sword]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|-
||[[Orcish frat-paddle]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*Part of the [[Frat Boy Ensemble]]
*+4 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Totally Gay Claymore]]
|data-sort-value=10.5|7-14
|data-sort-value=19|19 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
*A [[:Category:Custom Items|custom item]] given to [[PhilANThropiSt]]
|-
||[[repeating crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=10|7-13
|data-sort-value=17|17 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
||[[slide rule]]
|data-sort-value=10|7-13
|data-sort-value=17|17 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
|-
||[[accordion file]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*Regenerate 2-4 [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[boxing glove on a spring]]
|data-sort-value=8.5|6-11
|data-sort-value=12|12 Mox
|1-handed club
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +4
*[[Combat Initiative]] +10%
|-
||[[BRICKO sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|
*Part of the [[BRICKOfig Outfit]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +6
|-
||[[bubblewrap crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
|-
||[[bubblewrap staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|-
||[[bubblewrap sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
|-
||[[cardboard crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[cardboard staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[cardboard sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[dense meat crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
|-
||[[dense meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
|-
||[[dense meat sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
||[[diamond-studded cane]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
|-
||[[eXtreme meat crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
|-
||[[eXtreme meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
|-
||[[eXtreme meat sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
|-
||[[filthy pestle]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +7
|-
||[[flaming crutch]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed club
| 
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[glistening staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Gnollish autoplunger]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|3-handed spear
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
|-
||[[infernal fife]]
|data-sort-value=8.5|6-11
|data-sort-value=12|12 Mox
|2-handed flute
| 
*+7 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[knob bugle]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|1-handed horn
|
*[[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|-
||[[Knob Goblin elite polearm]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed polearm
|
*Part of the [[Knob Goblin Elite Guard Uniform]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[muculent machete]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
*+5% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[pair of bolt cutters]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed club
|
*[[Monster Level|Delevels]] on hit
|-
||[[poutine pole]]
|data-sort-value=8.5|6-11
|data-sort-value=12|12 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[ratarang]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|1-handed boomerang
|
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +7
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Pickpocket|Pickpocketed item]]
|-
||[[sabre teeth]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed knife
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +4
|-
||[[shotgun]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed
|
*Quest item
*Ranged Damage +10
|-
||[[slightly peevedbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed bow
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[styrofoam crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +3
|-
||[[styrofoam staff]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +3
|-
||[[styrofoam sword]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Monster Level]] +3
|-
||[[wooden axe]]
|data-sort-value=9|6-12
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mus
|2-handed axe
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
||[[5-Alarm Saucepan]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mys
|1-handed saucepan
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Sauceror|S]]' [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Enables the casting of 10-turn Sauceror buffs (all classes)
*Bonus for [[Sauceror|S]]s only
|-
||[[aerogel accordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed accordion
|
*Part of the [[Aeroutfit]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +20
*[[HP Modifiers|Maximum HP]] +40
*Only takes up one hand!
|-
||[[astral bludgeon]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +25%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
|-
||[[astral longbow]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed bow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +25%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
*+30% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[astral mace]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +25%
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20
*+4 [[Extra PvP Fights]]
|-
||[[astral pistol]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +25%
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage|Ranged Damage]] +20
*+4 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped
|-
||[[Ax of L'rose]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed axe
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[balloon sword]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Fumble Chance|Never Fumble]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] <font color=red>-2</font>
|-
||[[bal-musette accordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*+4 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fight(s)]] per day when equipped
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[basic meat spork]]
|data-sort-value=7|5-9
|data-sort-value=7|7 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[Bjorn's Hammer]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +10
*[[Seal Clubber|SC]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber|SC]]s only
|-
||[[blammer]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+7% chance of Critical Hit
*Successful hit weakens opponent.
|-
||[[blunt icepick]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+15 Cold Damage
|-
||[[boot knife]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[butterfly knife]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed knife
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +6
|-
||[[Cajun accordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +15
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[can of maces]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed club
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +2
*Slight {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
|-
||[[cheap plastic kazoo]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed kazoo
| 
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
||[[chiffon chakram]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed ranged weapon
| 
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*Deals [[Passive Damage|damage]] each round
|-
||[[clock-cleaning hammer]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Weapon Damage +20
|-
||[[corn holder]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +6
|-
||[[Crimbuccaneer squirtblunderbuss]]
|data-sort-value=7.0|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*100% chance of [[Poison Damage|poisoning]] opponent
*+30 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[curdflinger]]
|data-sort-value=7|5-9
|data-sort-value=7|7 Mox
|1-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Deleveling|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|-
||[[deathchucks]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|2-handed flail
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +75%
*+15 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
||[[Disco Banjo]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed banjo
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*+3 damage to DB combat skills
*[[Disco Bandit|DB]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Disco Bandit|DB]]s only
|-
||[[dripping meat crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
|-
||[[dripping meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
* [[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
|-
||[[dripping meat sword]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|-
||[[Elf Guard mouthknife]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|
*+3 [[Elf Warfare Effectiveness]]
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +20%
|-
||[[Elf Guard officer's sidearm]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*+3 [[Elf Warfare Effectiveness]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10%
|-
||[[Elf Guard squirtgun]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*Successful hit [[Deleveling|weakens]] opponent
*+20 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[fluorescent lightbulb]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +30
|-
||[[gift-a-pult]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed giftapult
|
* Allows hurling of Gift Items
|-
||[[glow-in-the-dark dart gun]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +([[Moons|9 - light]])
*+2x ([[Moons|9 - light]]) [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]]
*Super Accurate!
|-
||[[guancertina]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*+4 {{element|Stench}}
*Enables casting of 9-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[Hammerus]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+15 Spooky Damage
|-
||[[high-energy mining laser]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed rifle
|
*Part of the [[High-Radiation Mining Gear]]
*2x chance of Fumble
*+20 Hot Damage
|-
||[[high-temperature mining drill]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed drill
|
*Allows Mining in the Velvet / Gold Mine
|-
||[[inflatable baseball bat]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
|-
||[[iron dagger]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*+10 [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]]
*+5% Item drops from Monsters
|-
||[[Knob Goblin deluxe scimitar]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +5
|-
||[[law-abiding citizen cane]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+5 Maximum [[Hooch]]
|-
||[[loofah ladle]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*+2 Mysticality [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*[[MP Modifiers|Maximum MP]] +30
*Allows use of the [[Loofah Stew]] skill in combat
|-
||[[LyleCo premium magnifying glass]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*FantasyRealm enemies will drop 1 extra Rubee
|-
||[[Mace of the Tortoise]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed mace
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +7
*[[Turtle Tamer|TT]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Enables the casting of 10-turn TT buffs (all classes)
*Bonus for [[Turtle Tamer|TT]]s only
|-
||[[mercenary pistol]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed pistol
|
*All Attributes +10
*Never Fumble
*Allows the Use of Specialty Ammunition
|-
||[[moss mace]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+2 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*So-So {{element|Hot|Resistance}} (+2)
*Lets you [[Moss Mugging|mug]] a foe
|-
||[[office-supply crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +3
|-
||[[paraffin pseudoaccordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed accordion
|
*Part of the [[Paraffinalia]]
*+2 Moxie [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*+10 {{element|Spooky}}
*Lets you unleash a [[Prismatic Damage|prismatic attack]]
|-
||[[Pasta Spoon of Peril]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +7
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*[[Pastamancer|P]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Bonus for [[Pastamancer|P]]s only
|-
||[[pestoblade]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[pixel boomerang]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed boomerang
| 
*+5% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
||[[pixel chain whip]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed whip
|1-handed whip
| +1 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
|  
*All Attributes +4
|-
||[[pixel sword]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
*Part of the [[8-Bit Finery]]
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
|-
||[[poison pen]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|
*75% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|-
||[[polyester peeler]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*Part of the [[Synthetic Suit]]
*Spell Damage +20%
*Regenerate 2-4 MP per adventure
*Increases the Damage of Stuffed Mortar Shell
|-
||[[pottery club]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
* +5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[pottery yo-yo]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed yo-yo
| 
*+5 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[primitive alien blowgun]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed blowgun
| 
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +20
* +25 {{element|Sleaze}}
* Regenerate 2-4 [[HP_Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP_Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[primitive alien spear]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed spear
| 
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +20
* +25 {{element|Hot}}
* Regenerate 2-4 [[HP_Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP_Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[quirky accordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*+5 to [[Monster Level]]
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[Red Rover BB gun]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed gun
|
*+15% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*On critical, either puts out your eye (All Attributes <font color=red>-10%</font>) or your opponent's
|-
||[[Rock and Roll Legend]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +7
*[[Accordion Thief|AT]]'s [[Epic Weapons|Epic Weapon]]
*Enables the casting of 10-turn AT buffs (all classes)
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[sawed-off blunderbuss]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*+3 [[Pirate Warfare Effectiveness]]
*All Attributes +3
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Skipper's accordion]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*+10% [[Pickpocket]] Chance
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +15%
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[sucker tachi]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed weapon
|
*Weapon Damage +10
|-
||[[tambourine]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mox
|1-handed drum
|
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +20
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +20
|-
||[[toy Crimbot power glove]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knuckles
|
*Part of the [[Crimbot Crimboutfit]]
*Weapon Damage +15
*+1 Crimbot Outfit Power
*Allows use of ZAP in combat
|-
||[[Unionize The Elves sign]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*[[Deleveling|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
*No longer drops
|-
||[[velour voulge]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed polarm
|
*+2 Muscle [[Stat Gains from Fights|Stats Per Fight]]
*+30% [[Items from Monsters|Weapon Drops from Monsters]]
*Triples the effect of [[Snarl of Three Timberwolves|Snarl of the Timberwolf]]
|-
||[[warbear exhaust manifold]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*+10 {{element|Stench}}
*(Bonus for Accordion Thieves only)
|-
||[[warbear oil pan]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed saucepan
|
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|dmg=Hot Spells}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|dmg=Sleaze Spells}}
*[[Spray Hot Grease|Lets you sling hot grease]]!
|-
||[[wooden spoon]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*Spell Damage +5
|-
||[[worm-riding hooks]]
|data-sort-value=7.5|5-10
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[big bass drum]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mox
|2-handed drum
|
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +20
*[[Damage Absorption]] +8
|-
||[[calavera concertina]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Enables casting of 7-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[corrupt club of corruption]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed club
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*Player loses 3 HP at end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
||[[Dr. Hobo's scalpel]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mus
|1-handed knife
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*+1 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[dreadlock whip]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed whip
|
*+5 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+5 {{element|Stench}}
*[[Monster Level]] +10
|-
||[[dueling banjo]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|2-handed banjo
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +4
*+5 [[Monster Level]]
|-
||[[Gnollish flyswatter]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mus
|1-handed club
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[Gnollish plunger]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mus
|1-handed spear
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[half-sized guitar]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|2-handed guitar
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +2
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +4
|-
||[[ironic battle spoon]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
|-
||[[jack flapper]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mys
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
|-
||[[mama's squeezebox]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|2-handed accordion
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*Enables casting of 8-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[plastic replica blaster pistol]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed
|
*Combat Initiative +20%
*Ranged Damage +20
*This item disappears at the end of the day
|-
||[[pocket theremin]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mox
|2-handed theremin
| 
*+4 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[pool cue]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
*+3 to [[Pool Skill]]
|-
||[[rubber axe]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|2-handed axe
|
* +2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[sealhide whip]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mus
|1-handed whip
| 
*+25 {{element|Cold}}
|-
||[[spooky staff]]
|data-sort-value=5.5|4-7
|data-sort-value=2|2 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +2
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[starchy crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|1-handed crossbow
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +3
|-
||[[starchy staff]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
* [[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +3
|-
||[[starchy sword]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
||[[suede shortsword]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed sword
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[weighted paperclip chain]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed flail
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +12
|-
||[[western-style skinning knife]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed knife
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Hat/Pants Drops from Monsters]]
|-
||[[white sword]]
|data-sort-value=6|4-8
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|1-handed sword
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|-
||[[amok putter]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|
*+9 Hot Damage
*+9 Cold Damage
*Combat Initiative +18%
|-
||[[Bananubis's Staff]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed
|
*Quest item
*-6 Luck
*Raise Skeleton Buddies
|-
||[[baritone accordion]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*Regenerate 2-4 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] per adventure
*Enables casting of 7-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[Barney's rake]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|
*+3 Spooky Damage
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +3
|-
||[[bat whip]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
||[[beer-soaked mop]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[bone rattle]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed rattle
|
* +4 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[breadwand]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed wand
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +3
|-
||[[cardboard katana]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +20 more if [[Double-Fisted Skull Smashing|dual-wielded]] with a [[cardboard wakizashi]]
|-
||[[cardboard wakizashi]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 4
*gives the [[cardboard katana]] 20 more [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] when [[Double-Fisted Skull Smashing|dual-wielded]]
|-
||[[cheap plastic blowgun]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed blowgun
|
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|-
||[[cheap plastic bottle opener]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
| 
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|
*[[MP Restorers|Restore]] 0-2 MP on successful hit
|-
||[[eggbeater]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +2
|-
||[[electric crutch]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed staff
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +30
|-
||[[evil paper umbrella]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed umbrella
| 
*+1 [[Monster Level]]
|-
||[[Gnollish slotted spoon]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
|-
||[[grave robbing shovel]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*[[Combat Initiative]] <font color=red>-10%</font>
|-
||[[halfberd]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed polearm
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +2
|-
||[[huge mirror shard]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +5
*Quest item
*No longer available
|-
||[[Knob Goblin spatula]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +4
|-
||[[little paper umbrella]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed umbrella
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +1
|-
||[[obsidian dagger]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=10|10 Mus
|1-handed knife
|
*+3 {{element|Spooky}}
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+3 {{element|Cold}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[out-of-tune biwa]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed guitar
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Ranged Damage]] +2
|-
||[[palm-frond whip]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Part of the [[Palmist Paraphernalia]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +30
*Can break in combat
|-
||[[parasitic claw]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Part of the [[Mutant Couture]]
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +player level (capped at 15), or 2x player level with [[Yuletide Mutations]]
|-
||[[portable corkscrew]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
|-
||[[rattail whip]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
||[[rubber band gun]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +5
|-
||[[rubber spatula]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*Spell Damage +2
|-
||[[sewer snake]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed flail
|
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[shiny butcherknife]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +5
|-
||[[skeleton bone]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
* +1 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[spooky stick]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
|
* +2 {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[spork]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +2
|-
||[[stone banjo]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed banjo
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|-
||[[sturdy machete]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*Quest item
*Weapon Damage +5
|-
||[[tail o' nine cats]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*[[Monster Level]] +5
|-
||[[third-hand nunchaku]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=7|7 Mus
|2-handed flail
|
* [[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
|-
||[[throwing wrench]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
* [[Monster Level|Delevels]] on hit
|-
||[[trusty torch]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
* +3 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[trusty whip]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Quest item
* Available in [[Tales of Spelunking (area)]] only
|-
||[[Wand of Nagamar]]
|data-sort-value=4.5|3-6
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed wand
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[wooden stakes]]
|data-sort-value=4|3-5
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed spear
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +1
|-
||[[asparagus knife]]
|data-sort-value=2.5|2-3
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
| 
*+1 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[basic meat crossbow]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mox
|2-handed crossbow
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|-
||[[basic meat staff]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|2-handed staff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +1
|-
||[[basic meat sword]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=5|5 Mus
|2-handed sword
|
* [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +1
|-
||[[beer-battered accordion]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*+2 Sleaze Damage
*(Bonus for Accordion Thieves only)
|-
||[[bonerang]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed boomerang
| 
*+10 Damage vs. Skeletons
|-
||[[boning knife]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
| 
*+10 Damage vs. Skeletons
|-
||[[cap gun]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*Base [[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] Limited to 200
*Base [[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] Limited to 200
*Base [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] Limited to 200
*Bang Bang! (Grants skill [[Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!]]"
|-
||[[club of corruption]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*Player loses 1 HP at end of combat
*Bonus for [[Seal Clubber]]s only
|-
||[[dented harmonica]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed horn
|
* [[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +1
|-
||[[dishrag]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
| 
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[fouet de tortue-dressage]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+10 to [[Familiar Weight]]
*+10 to Familiar Damage
|-
||[[gnauga hide whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Part of the [[Gnauga Hides]]
*+3% [[Items from Monsters]]
|-
||[[Gnollish pie server]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
* [[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +3
|-
||[[hippo whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* [[Monster Level]] +10
|-
||[[Knob Goblin scimitar]]
|data-sort-value=2.5|2-3
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Muscle Modifiers|Muscle]] +1
|-
||[[Knob Goblin tongs]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +2
|-
||[[penguin whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* +3% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[remaindered axe]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Muscle +2
*Weapon Damage +2
|-
||[[scorpion whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +13
*50% chance of [[Passive Damage|poisoning opponent]]
|-
||[[slingshot]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed slingshot
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[soup-chucks]]
|data-sort-value=2.5|2-3
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed flail
|
*  +2 {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[space beast fur whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Part of the [[Space Beast Furs]]
*[[Damage Reduction]]: 5
|-
||[[sweet ninja sword]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[tiny ninja sword]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
* [[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|-
||[[wumpus-hair whip]]
|data-sort-value=2.5|2-3
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Part of the [[Wumpus-Hair Wardrobe]]
*+2 {{element|Spooky}}
*+2 {{element|Stench}}
*+2 {{element|Hot}}
*+2 {{element|Cold}}
*+2 {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[yak whip]]
|data-sort-value=3|2-4
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* [[Monster Level|Successful hit weakens opponent]]
|-
||[[airblaster gun]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed pistol
|
*Gives skill [[Air Blast]] in combat
|-
||[[antique accordion]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*Enables casting of 10-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs for all classes
|-
||[[archaeologing shovel]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|
* Allowed digging at [[Bigg's Dig]]
*No longer available
|-
||[[bar whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
| 
*+2 to [[Familiar Weight]]
|-
||[[big stick]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed staff
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[bucket of anniversary lard]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed flail
|
* All Attributes +1
|-
||[[candy knuckles]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knuckles
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +25
*Breaks after 31 combats
|-
||[[can-you-dig-it?]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed spade
| 
*+???
|-
||[[chisel]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed knife
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[clown hammer]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Squeaky!
|-
||[[clown whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*So-So {{element|Sleaze|Resistance}}
|-
||[[cool whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[costume sword]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] <font color=red>-10</font>
*[[Combat Initiative]] +30%
|-
||[[demon whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+3 {{element|Hot}}
*+3 {{element|Sleaze}}
*+3 {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[disco ball]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed disco ball
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[hilarious comedy prop]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Regenerate 4-6 [[HP Regeneration|HP]] and [[MP Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed club
|
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +10
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +10
*[[HP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 1-3 HP per adventure
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 1-3 MP per adventure
*Cannot equip in [[Hardcore]]
|-
||[[lavalarva]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+30 {{element|Hot}}
*Stupendous Cold Resistance (+4)
*+10 to [[Monster Level]]
|-
||[[licorice whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+5% Chance of Critical Hit
*Candiful Crits
|-
||[[live wire]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +3
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per adventure
|-
||[[Mayor Ghost's gavel]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*+10% Chance of Critical Hit
*Weapon Damage +30
*+50 Damage vs. Ghosts
*Grants skill [[Hammer Ghost]]
|-
||[[murderbot whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=30|30 Mus
|1-handed whip
|
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage|Weapon Damage]] +10
*+10% [[Critical Hit Chance|Chance of Critical Hit]]
*Deals 1,000 extra damage on Critical Hit
|-
||[[The Necbromancer's Wizard Staff]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*+30 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 20-30 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Sleaze}} and delevel
|-
||[[pasta spoon]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed utensil
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[pixel whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* All Attributes +3
|-
||[[rope]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+2 Muscle Stat(s) Per Fight
*+10 to Familiar Weight
|-
||[[saucepan]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed saucepan
|
*Enables the casting of 5-turn Sauceror buffs (all classes)
|-
||[[seal-clubbing club]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[Spelunker's whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*Part of [[Spelunker's Gear]]
*Weapon Damage +25%
*+10% Item Drops from Monsters
*+5 to Familiar Weight
|-
||[[Spooky Putty snake]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +50%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Spooky|Spells}}
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 6-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do 25% of the enemy's remaining HP in {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[Staff of Blood and Pudding]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +25%
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +15
*[[MP Regeneration|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to steal and [[HP Restorers|restore HP]]
|-
||[[Staff of Fruit Salad]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +10
*Regenerate 2-3 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Deal some Prismatic damage
|-
||[[Staff of Holiday Sensations]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +75%
*+15 Damage to Cold Spells
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[Staff of Kitchen Royalty]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +200%
*Regenerate 30-40 [[MP_Regeneration|MP]] per adventure
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +50%
*+4 [[Extra Rollover Adventures|Adventures]] per day when equipped
*+4 [[Extra PvP Fights|PvP fights]] per day when equipped
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Spooky}} (thrice)
|-
||[[Staff of Queso Escusado]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +50%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 6-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Stench}}
*May not be equipped in [[Hardcore]]
|-
||[[Staff of Simmering Hatred]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Part of the [[Hateful Habiliment]]
*Regenerate 20-30 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Reduce enemy defense by 10%
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
|-
||[[Staff of the All-Steak]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*Damage Reduction: 15
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Massive Bonus to Item Drops (5 charges left today)
|-
||[[Staff of the Black Kettle]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +75%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +10
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-6 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
||[[Staff of the Cozy Fish]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=85|85 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15%
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*Makes you a much better diver
|-
||[[Staff of the Cream of the Cream]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +30
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Attune to Monster's Essence
|-
||[[Staff of the Deepest Freeze]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*+30 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 20-30 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Cold}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Electric Range]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*+20 Damage to Spooky Spells
*Regenerate 8-10 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[Staff of the Grand Flambé]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*Superhuman {{element|Cold|Resistance}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Grease Trap]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Greasefire]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=20|20 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +35%
*+10 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*+10 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 3-4 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Hot}} and {{element|Sleaze}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Headmaster's Victuals]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Regenerate 2-3 MP per adventure
*+5 Damage to Sleaze Spells
*+5 Smithsness
*+X Spell Damage
*(+Spell Damage based on Smithsness)
|-
||[[Staff of the Healthy Breakfast]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +15
*+10% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*Regenerate 2-4 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Recover Some HP
|-
||[[Staff of the Hearty Dinner]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*Damage Reduction: 5
*Regenerate 2-3 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Weaken Bad Guy
|-
||[[Staff of the Kitchen Floor]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Light Lunch]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +10
*[[Combat Initiative]] +15%
*Regenerate 2-3 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Deal Some {{element|Cold}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Lunch Lady]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item only in KOLHS run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +75%
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]]/[[MP Modifiers|MP]] +15
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*+25% Food Drops from Monsters
|-
||[[Staff of the Midnight Snack]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*+10 Damage to {{element|Spooky|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[Staff of the November Jack-O-Lantern]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*+10 Damage to {{element|Stench|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Stench}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Peppermint Twist]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=200|200 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +200%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*+20 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
*Regenerate 15-20 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to delevel and stagger
|-
||[[Staff of the Roaring Hearth]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=250|250 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +250%
*+40 Damage to {{element|Hot|Spells}}
*Regenerate 30-35 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
|-
||[[Staff of the Scummy Sink]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Sleaze|Spells}}
*Regenerate 8-10 [[HP Restorers|HP]] per adventure
*Slime Hates It
|-
||[[Staff of the Short Order Cook]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=15|15 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +20%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 2-3 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
||[[Staff of the Soupbone]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=75|75 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +75%
*Maximum [[MP Modifiers|MP]] +15
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-6 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Spooky}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Staff of Life]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*Maximum [[HP Modifiers|HP]] +30
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Regenerate 10-12 HP per adventure
*Jiggle: Full HP Recovery
|-
||[[Staff of the Standalone Cheese]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=50|50 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*Quest item in AoJ run
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +50%
*[[Combat Initiative]] +30%
*Regenerate 5-6 [[MP Restorers|MP]] per adventure
*Jiggle: Banish opponent for the rest of the day
|-
||[[Staff of the Teapot Tempest]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=25|25 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +25%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +5
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 3-4 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
||[[Staff of the Walk-In Freezer]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +150%
*+20 Damage to {{element|Cold|Spells}}
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 8-10 MP per Adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do {{element|Cold}}
|-
||[[Staff of the Well-Tempered Cauldron]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=125|125 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage|Spell Damage]] +125%
*[[Mysticality Modifiers|Mysticality]] +15
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 7-8 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled in combat to do physical damage
|-
||[[Staff of the Woodfire]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=150|150 Mys
|1-handed chefstaff
|
*[[:Category:Chefstaves|Chefstaves]] can only be equipped with a [[special sauce glove]] (and as a Sauceror), having [[Spirit of Rigatoni]] or being an [[Avatar of Jarlsberg]]
*[[Bonus Spell Damage]] +100%
*+10 Mysticality [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
*[[MP Restorers|Regenerate]] 5-15 MP per adventure
*Can be jiggled once per combat to do {{element|Spooky}} and {{element|Hot}}
|-
||[[sticky hand whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
*+5% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]]
*+10% [[Pickpocket]] Chance
*+15% [[Meat from Monsters]]
|-
||[[stolen accordion]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*Enables casting of 5-turn [[Accordion Thief]] buffs
*Bonus for [[Accordion Thief|AT]]s only
|-
||[[stuffed club]]
|data-sort-value=1|1
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed club
|
*Replaces sound effects
|-
||[[stuffed crazy bastard sword]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[tiny plastic sword]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
|
*[[Moxie Modifiers|Moxie]] +1
|-
||[[toy accordion]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed accordion
|
*Enables the casting of 5-turn AT buffs (all classes)
|-
||[[toy taijijian]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed sword
| &nbsp;
|-
||[[trash net]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed polearm
|
*Quest item
|-
||[[turtle totem]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed totem
|
*Enables the casting of 5-turn TT buffs (all classes)
|-
||[[twisted-up wet towel]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* +25% [[Items from Monsters|Item Drops from Monsters]] (KoL High School zones only)
|-
||[[white whip]]
|data-sort-value=1.5|1-2
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed whip
|
* +1 [[Stat Gains from Fights]]
|-
||[[KoL Con 12-gauge]]
|data-sort-value=0|0-0
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed shotgun
|
*Maximum HP/MP +12
|-
||[[Tales of the Word Realms]]
|data-sort-value=0|0-0
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed book
|
* Lends Power to Your Words
|-
||[[gnollish nunchaku]]
|data-sort-value=0|N/A
|data-sort-value=0|None
|2-handed flail
|
*No longer available in game
|-
||[[turtleslinger]]
|data-sort-value=0|N/A
|data-sort-value=0|None
|1-handed slingshot
|
* No longer available in game
|-
|-
|}
|}
Line 3,848: Line 6,528:
==See also==
==See also==
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] (affects all damage dealt from regular attacks)
*[[Bonus Weapon Damage]] (affects all damage dealt from regular attacks)
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] (affects all damage dealt from regular attacks when a [[ranged weapon]] is equipped)
*[[Bonus Ranged Damage]] (affects all damage dealt from regular attacks when a [[ranged weapons|ranged weapon]] is equipped)


[[Category:Game Mechanics]]
[[Category:Game Mechanics]]
[[Category:Weapons|{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:Weapons|{{PAGENAME}}]]

Latest revision as of 22:15, 24 August 2025

[ Return to Game Mechanics ]

Weapons are things adventurers use to hurt monsters, rocks, grass, small children, air, each other, and whatever else happens to get in their line of fire.

As a general rule:

In terms of weapon types, all weapons of the following types are ranged:

  • accordion
  • autopult
  • banjo
  • bong
  • boomerang
  • bow
  • can
  • catapult
  • crossbow
  • disco ball
  • euphemisms
  • guitar
  • gun
  • heavy blowgun
  • pistol
  • radio
  • rifle
  • sack
  • sitar
  • slingshot
  • superball
  • throwing spear
  • yo-yo
  • yoyo

Chefstaves, utensils, and saucepans are Mysticality weapons, as is the special Periodical Paintbrush. All other items are generally melee weapons, although there are exceptions; for example, the lucky ball-and-chain is a ranged flail, the can of maces is a ranged club, and the heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr is a ranged axe.

If you're clumsy, you may fumble your weapon on some part of your body. Not only does this hurt, it allows your opponent to get a free hit on you. Which also hurts. And let's face it: everyone's a little clumsy.

Before an update on September 5th, 2012, weapons only had a power listed. The game would calculate damage by rolling for a number between 10% and 20% of the weapon's power. Following this update, damage scores were instead listed directly on the item's page, replacing power.

Name Damage Requirement Weapon Type Notes
Granny Hackleton's Gatling gun 30-60 70 Mox 1-handed machine gun
Great Wolf's right paw 30-60 250 Mus 1-handed claw
Great Wolf's rocket launcher 30-60 100 Mox 2-handed bazooka
scepter of the Skeleton Lord 30-60 50 Mys 2-handed staff
Unkillable Skeleton's restless leg 30-60 100 Mus 2-handed staff
Unkillable Skeleton's sawsword 30-60 100 Mus 2-handed sword
zombie accordion 30-60 250 Mox 1-handed accordion
bag of unfinished business 23-45 200 Mox 2-handed doggie bag
  • +40 Stench Damage
  • +5 to Familiar Weight
frying brainpan 23-45 200 Mys 1-handed saucepan
  • +40 Damage to Hot Spells
  • Enables the casting of 20-turn Sauceror buffs
  • Maximum MP +200
groping claw 23-45 200 Mus 1-handed claw
hothammer 23-45 200 Mus 1-handed club
old dry bone 23-45 200 Mus 1-handed club
remorseless knife 23-45 200 Mus 1-handed knife
  • Successful hit causes bleeding.
7-inch discus 20-40 85 Mox 1-handed boomerang
Bigger Bugfinder Blade 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed sword
  • All Attributes +11
  • +3 Adventure(s) per day when equipped
  • Awarded to people who find major bugs or a lot of bugs
bindlestocking 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
Bloodbath 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed sword
  • So-So Resistance to All Elements (+2)
  • Regenerate 25-30 HP and MP per adventure
brand new key 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed knife
Brimstone Bludgeon 20-40 30 Mus 1-handed club
Byte 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed sword
Chester's bag of candy 20-40 200 Mox 2-handed ranged weapon
Coily™ 20-40 200 Mox 2-handed spring
cozy bazooka 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed bazooka
  • Moxie +15%
  • +20% Meat from Monsters
  • Makes you a much better diver
cozy scimitar 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed sword
cursed cutlass 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed sword
decaying wooden oar 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed club  
deep six-shooter 20-40 85 Mox 1-handed pistol
diabolical crossbow 20-40 150 Mox 1-handed crossbow
Dinsey's pizza cutter 20-40 100 Mys 1-handed utensil
dreadful glove 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed knife-glove
duct tape sword 20-39 82 Mus 1-handed sword
egg gun 20-40 40 Mox 1-handed pistol
El Vibrato energy spear 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed spear
FDKOL fire hose 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed hose
fetus-smashing club 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed club
fire axe 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed axe
fish bazooka 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed bazooka
fish scimitar 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed sword
fish stick 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed staff
Flail of the Seven Aspects 20-40 60 Mus 1-handed flail
flamin' bindle 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
freezin' bindle 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
Frosty's arm 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed staff
Frosty's nailbat 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed club
Frosty's snowball sack 20-40 200 Mox 1-handed sack
fruit bat 20-40 75 Mus 1-handed club
garbage sticker 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed spear
giant fishhook 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed spear  
giant shrimp fork 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed staff
  • Mysticality +20%
  • +10% Chance of Spell Critical Hit
  • Maximum MP +100
giant turkey leg 20-40 200 Mus 3-handed club
Ginsu™ 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed sword
gunwale whalegun 20-40 None 2-handed machine gun
halibut 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed fish
Hodgman's whackin' stick 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed club
  • All Attributes +20%
  • On Critical: Insanity!
The Jokester's gun 20-40 50 Mox 1-handed pistol
lawn dart 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed club
Meatcleaver 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed sword
Mer-kin digpick 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed axe
Mer-kin dodgeball 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed dodgeball
Mer-kin dragnet 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed dragnet
Mer-kin finpaddle 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed club
Mer-kin hookspear 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed spear
Mer-kin switchblade 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed switchblade
miniature deck cannon 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed handcannon
Mjolnir Jr. 20-40 85 Mys 1-handed utensil
non-stick pugil stick 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed club
octopus's spade 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed knife
Ol' Scratch's infernal pitchfork 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
pernicious cudgel 20-40 150 Mus 1-handed club
Pigsticker of Violence 20-40 100 Mus 1-handed knife
PVC staff 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed staff
rusty piece of rebar 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed club
rusty speargun 20-40 85 Mox 1-handed pistol
rusty staff 20-40 85 Mys 2-handed staff
Seeger's Unstoppable Banjo 20-40 60 Mox 2-handed banjo
skate blade 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed knife
skate board 20-40 85 Mus 2-handed club
sleazy bindle 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
Sledgehammer of the Vælkyr 20-40 60 Mus 1-handed club
slime-covered club 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed club
slime-covered shovel 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
slime-covered speargun 20-40 200 Mox 1-handed pistol
slime-covered staff 20-40 200 Mys 2-handed staff
soap knife 20-40 60 Mus 1-handed knife  
spooky bindle 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
Stick-Knife of Loathing 20-40 150 Mus 1-handed knife
stinkin' bindle 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed polearm
super-sweet boom box 20-40 75 Mox 1-handed radio
  • All Attributes +20%
  • Regenerate 5-10 HP and MP per adventure
  • Allows you to keep 4 songs in your head instead of 3.
Sword of Procedural Generation 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed sword
  • Varies player to player
teflon spatula 20-40 85 Mys 1-handed utensil
The Trickster's Trikitixa 20-40 60 Mox 2-handed accordion
triple barreled barrel gun 20-40 85 Mox 3-handed shotgun
  • Weapon Damage +100%
  • +10% Chance of Critical Hit
  • +25% Meat from Monsters
Truthsayer 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed sword
Uncle Hobo's highest bough 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed club
Underworld flail 20-40 150 Mox 2-handed flail
Underworld truncheon 20-40 150 Mus 2-handed club
velcro broadsword 20-40 85 Mus 1-handed sword
velcro paddle ball 20-40 85 Mox 1-handed flail
villainous scythe 20-40 150 Mus 2-handed polearm
White Dragon Fang 20-40 200 Mus 1-handed sword
Windsor Pan of the Source 20-40 60 Mys 1-handed saucepan
wolf whistle 20-40 85 Mox 1-handed whistle
Wrath of the Capsaician Pastalords 20-40 60 Mys 1-handed utensil
Zim Merman's guitar 20-40 85 Mox 2-handed guitar
Zombo's shoulder blade 20-40 200 Mus 2-handed sword
beer bong 19-38 80 Mox 1-handed bong
beer-a-pult 19-38 80 Mox 3-handed catapult
cast-iron legacy paddle 19-38 80 Mus 2-handed club
fire poi 19-38 80 Mox 2-handed flail
giant driftwood sculpture 19-38 80 Mus 2-handed flail
massive sitar 19-38 80 Mox 2-handed sitar
alarm accordion 18-36 75 Mox 2-handed accordion
Bugfinder Blade 18-36 75 Mus 2-handed sword
  • All Attributes +7
  • +3 Adventure(s) per day when equipped
  • Awarded to people who find a few bugs
didgeridooka 18-36 75 Mox 2-handed heavy blowgun
ghast iron cleaver 18-35 72 Mus 1-handed club
goatskin umbrella 18-36 75 Mus 1-handed umbrella
honey dipper 18-35 72 Mys 1-handed utensil
oversized pipe 18-35 72 Mus 1-handed club
perforated battle paddle 18-35 72 Mus 2-handed club
plexiglass pikestaff 18-36 75 Mus 2-handed club
toy ray gun 18-35 72 Mox 1-handed pistol
unsanitized scalpel 18-36 35 Mus 1-handed knife
war tongs 18-36 75 Mys 1-handed utensil
ancient ice cream scoop 17-34 70 Mys 1-handed utensil
charming flute 17-34 70 Mox 2-handed flute
combat fan 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed flail
  • +3 Prismatic Damage
denim axe 17-34 70 Mus 2-handed axe
Drowsy Sword 17-34 66 Mus 2-handed sword
dwarvish war mattock 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed axe
giant foam finger 17-34 70 Mus 1-handed club
happiness 17-33 67 Mox 1-handed pistol
Maxwell's Silver Hammer 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed club
peace accordion 17-34 70 Mox 2-handed accordion
pygmy spear 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed spear
red-hot poker 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed club
  • +15 Hot Damage
Saturday Night Special 17-33 67 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • So-So Hot Resistance (+2)
short-handled mop 17-33 67 Mus 1-handed polearm
star crossbow 17-33 67 Mox 2-handed crossbow
star staff 17-33 67 Mus 2-handed staff
star sword 17-33 67 Mus 2-handed sword
accordionoid rocca 16-32 65 Mox 2-handed accordion
  • Damage Reduction: 10 (First Hit Only)
  • Enables casting of 18-turn Accordion Thief buffs
  • Bonus for ATs only
antique machete 16-31 62 Mus 1-handed sword
arse-shooting crossbow 16-32 65 Mox 2-handed crossbow
black blade 16-32 65 Mus 1-handed knife
  • +10 Spooky Damage
  • Successful attacks restore some HP
black sword 16-32 65 Mus 1-handed sword
breadchucks 16-31 62 Mus 1-handed flail
coal shovel 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed polearm
creepy-ass club 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed club
cyber-mattock 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed axe
evil-ass club 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed club
fleetwood chain 16-31 62 Mus 1-handed flail
  • Weapon Damage +5
frigid-ass club 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed club
giant cactus quill 16-32 65 Mus 1-handed spear
  • +7% chance of Critical Hit
  • Maximum HP +30
giant discarded plastic fork 16-31 62 Mus 3-handed staff
giant safety pin 16-31 62 Mus 1-handed spear
half-size scalpel 16-31 62 Mus 1-handed knife
heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr 16-32 65 Mox 2-handed axe
hot-ass club 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed club
jungle drum 16-32 65 Mox 2-handed drum
magilaser blastercannon 16-31 62 Mox 2-handed laser cannon
nasty-ass club 16-32 65 Mus 2-handed club
The Nuge's favorite crossbow 16-32 30 Mox 1-handed crossbow
pewter claymore 16-31 62 Mus 2-handed sword
  • Regenerate 6-12 HP and MP per adventure
pointed stick 16-32 65 Mus 1-handed spear
tommy gun 16-32 65 Mox 2-handed rifle
trout fang 16-32 65 Mus 1-handed knife
X-37 gun 16-32 65 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • Attack damage in a random element
  • Can break in combat, damaging player
yohohoyo 16-32 65 Mox 1-handed yoyo
a butt tuba 15-29 57 Mox 2-handed horn
antique nutcracker sword 15-30 30 Mus 1-handed sword
antique spear 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed polearm
automatic catapult 15-30 60 Mox 2-handed autopult  
backwoods banjo 15-30 50 Mox 2-handed banjo
bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme 15-30 60 Mus 2-handed polearm?  
bugbear-smiting sword 15-30 60 Mus 2-handed sword
C.B.F.G. 15-30 60 Mox 2-handed rifle
C.H.U.M. knife 15-30 175 Mus 1-handed knife
candy knife 15-30 40 Mus 1-handed knife  
club of the five seasons 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed club
double barreled barrel gun 15-30 60 Mox 2-handed shotgun
drywall axe 15-30 60 Mus 2-handed axe
  • All Attributes +2
  • All Attributes +3%
flaming sword 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed sword
  • +20 Hot Damage
  • +10% chance of Spell Critical Hit
  • Never Fumble
giant artisanal rice peeler 15-30 60 Mys 1-handed utensil
giant needle 15-30 60 Mus 2-handed spear
grassy cutlass 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed sword
grease cannon 15-30 35 Mox 1-handed bazooka
Grimacite gat 15-30 40 Mox 1-handed gun
heavy leather-bound tome 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed club
heteroerotic frat-paddle 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed club
immense cyborg hand 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed club
keel-haulin' knife 15-30 60 Mys 1-handed utensil
love 15-30 35 Mox 1-handed pistol
mercenary rifle 15-30 30 Mox 2-handed rifle
  • Ranged Damage +20
  • Combat Initiative +50%
  • Allows the Use of Specialty Ammunition
murderbot plasma rifle 15-30 30 Mox 2-handed rifle
obsidian nutcracker 15-30 60 Mys 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +30%
Othello's dagger 15-30 50 Mus 1-handed knife
Pener's drumstick 15-30 35 Mus 1-handed club
pipe wrench 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed club
pygmy concertinette 15-30 60 Mox 1-handed accordion
Radio Free Foil 15-30 60 Mus 2-handed sword
rainbow crossbow 15-30 60 Mox 1-handed crossbow
spectral axe 15-30 50 Mus 1-handed axe
star spatula 15-30 60 Mys 1-handed utensil
toxic mop 15-30 50 Mus 2-handed polearm
vibrating cyborg knife 15-30 55 Mus 1-handed sword
witty rapier 15-30 60 Mus 1-handed sword
world's smallest violin 15-30 60 Mox 1-handed violin
batblade 15-29 57 Mus 1-handed knife
acoustic guitarrr 14-28 55 Mox 2-handed guitar
armgun 14-28 55 Mox 2-handed machine gun
black kettle drum 14-28 55 Mox 2-handed drum
carob cannon 14-27 45 Mox 2-handed crossbow
crowbar 14-28 55 Mus 1-handed club
frozen seal spine 14-28 55 Mus 1-handed club
gatorskin umbrella 14-28 100 Mus 1-handed umbrella
ghost accordion 14-28 55 Mox 2-handed accordion
  • +5 Spooky Damage
  • +15% Booze Drops from Monsters
  • Enables casting of 16-turn Accordion Thief buffs
  • Bonus for ATs only
hairy staff 14-27 45 Mus 2-handed staff
ram-battering staff 14-27 52 Mus 2-handed staff
rave whistle 14-27 52 Mox 1-handed whistle
ridiculously huge sword 14-28 55 Mus 3-handed sword
silver cheese-slicer 14-28 55 Mys 1-handed utensil
silver paté knife 14-28 55 Mys 1-handed utensil
Spirit Precipice 14-27 45 Mus 2-handed sword
star boomerang 14-27 52 Mox 1-handed boomerang
star stiletto 14-27 52 Mus 1-handed knife
autocalliope 13-26 50 Mox 2-handed accordion
bad-ass club 13-26 50 Mus 2-handed club
bastard baster 13-25 47 Mys 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +20%
battery-powered drill 13-25 47 Mus 1-handed drill
  • Spell Damage +100%
  • Maximum HP/MP +50
  • +10 to Monster Level
  • +10% Meat from Monsters
beaver spear 13-25 47 Mus 1-handed spear
crazy bastard sword 13-25 25 Mus 1-handed sword
curmudgel 13-25 47 Mus 1-handed club
ga-ga radio 13-25 47 Mox 2-handed radio
Grimacite glaive 13-25 47 Mus 2-handed polearm
hand-carved bokken 13-26 30 Mus 1-handed sword
hand-carved bow 13-26 30 Mox 2-handed bow
hand-carved staff 13-26 30 Mus 2-handed staff
hot cross bow 13-26 45 Mox 2-handed crossbow
huge mosquito proboscis 13-25 47 Mus 1-handed spear
  • Regenerate 8-12 HP per adventure
  • Maximum HP +20
kelp-holly gun 13-25 25 Mox 1-handed pistol
leechknife 13-25 47 Mus 1-handed knife
  • Maximum HP +10
  • Maximum MP +5
  • Regenerate 4-6 HP and MP per adventure
lucky ball-and-chain 13-26 50 Mox 2-handed flail  
meatspout staff 13-25 45 Mus 2-handed staff
oil pan 13-26 47 Mys 1-handed saucepan
  • Mysticality +10%
  • Enables the casting of 12-turn Sauceror buffs
peppermint spine 13-25 20 Mys 1-handed staff
projectile icemaker 13-25 45 Mox 2-handed crossbow
shuddersword 13-25 45 Mus 2-handed sword
smoldering staff 13-25 45 Mus 2-handed staff
staph of homophones 13-26 45 Mus 2-handed staff
sword behind inappropriate prepositions 13-26 45 Mus 2-handed sword
titanium assault umbrella 13-26 50 Mus 1-handed umbrella
adobe adze 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed club
asbestos sword 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed sword
bone and arrows 12-24 45 Mox 2-handed bow
  • +30 Damage vs. Skeletons
bone crusher 12-24 45 Mus 1-handed club
  • +30 Damage vs. Skeletons
buffalo blade 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed sword
carrot-on-a-stick 12-24 45 Mox 1-handed flail
  • Moxie +7
  • +50% Candy Drops from Monsters
ceramic celery grater 12-24 40 Mys 1-handed weapon
chrome crossbow 12-24 45 Mox 2-handed crossbow
elevenderizing hammer 12-23 11 Mus 1-handed club
fiberglass foil 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed sword
flagstone flail 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed flail
giant cheesestick 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed staff
gummi sword 12-24 45 Mus 1-handed sword
  • Muscle +7
  • +50% Candy Drops from Monsters
half-melted spoon 12-23 42 Mys 1-handed utensil
Jacob's rung 12-24 45 Mys 1-handed staff
lawnmower blade 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed sword
linoleum staff 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed staff
lupine sword 12-23 42 Mus 1-handed sword
Mer-kin rollpin 12-24 25 Mus 1-handed utensil
non-Euclidean non-accordion 12-23 42 Mox 2-handed accordion
ocarina of space 12-24 45 Mox 2-handed flute
old school Mafia knicke½æ 12-23 41 Mys 1-handed sword
petrified wood war pike 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed polearm
  • Muscle +20%
  • +5 PvP fights per day when equipped
  • Attack a second time when you attack
porcelain police baton 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed club
potato pistol 12-24 45 Mox 1-handed pistol
ram stick 12-23 42 Mus 2-handed staff
Red Roger's red right hand 12-24 None 1-handed club
Ruby Rod 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed rod
serpentine sword 12-23 42 Mus 1-handed sword
silver shrimp fork 12-24 45 Mys 1-handed utensil
stained glass shiv 12-24 40 Mus 1-handed knife
Sword of Dark Omens 12-24 None 1-handed sword
terra cotta tongs 12-24 40 Mys 1-handed utensil
two-handed depthsword 12-24 45 Mus 2-handed sword  
wrought-iron whisk 12-24 40 Mys 1-handed utensil
Accordion of Jordion 11-21 37 Mox 2-handed accordion
asbestos crossbow 11-22 40 Mox 2-handed crossbow
bone flute 11-22 40 Mox 2-handed flute
chrome staff 11-22 40 Mus 2-handed staff
ghostly dagger 11-22 40 Mus 1-handed knife
haunted paddle-ball 11-22 40 Mox 1-handed flail
hawk 11-22 40 Mus 1-handed saw
iron pasta spoon 11-22 40 Mys 1-handed utensil
linoleum sword 11-22 40 Mus 2-handed sword
machetito 11-22 40 Mus 1-handed sword
mannequin leg 11-22 40 Mus 1-handed club
sack of doorknobs 11-22 40 Mox 2-handed sack  
wicker sticker 11-22 None 1-handed knife
ancient Elf dessert spoon 10-20 None 1-handed utensil
asbestos staff 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed staff
bamboo bokuto 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword  
barrel gun 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed pistol
big stirring stick 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed staff
Bonestabber 10-20 None 1-handed sword
bottle-rocket crossbow 10-20 None 1-handed crossbow
bounty-hunting rifle 10-20 25 Mox 2-handed rifle
bow staff 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed staff
can of fake snow 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed can
candlestick 10-20 None 1-handed wand
chocolate cow bone 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed club
  • +30% Candy Drops from Monsters
  • Candilicious Smacks!
chrome sword 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed sword
Crimbo sword 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed sword
Crimbomination Contraption 10-20 None 2-handed club  
Crimbuccaneer tavern swab 10-20 None 2-handed polearm
depleted Grimacite hammer 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed club
duck-on-a-string 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed flail
Elf Guard broom 10-20 None 2-handed polearm
elf ploughshare 10-20 None 1-handed sword
elven tambourine 10-20 None 1-handed rattle
exclusive club 10-20 None 1-handed club
  • It's very exclusive!
elven whittling knife 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed knife
  • Does extra damage on criticals
flaming juggler's balls 10-20 None 1-handed euphemisms
Frankly Mr. Shank 10-20 None 1-handed knife
  • Disco Bandit Combat Skills weaken enemies by an additional 25%
  • +5 Smithsness
  • Moxie +X%
    • X based on Smithsness
  • Bonus for Disco Bandits only
giant candy cane 10-20 None 2-handed staff
gilded trumpet 10-20 None 1-handed horn
goulauncher 10-20 35 Mox 2-handed crossbow
haiku katana 10-20 None 1-handed sword
Hand that Rocks the Ladle 10-20 None 1-handed utensil
ice nine 10-20 None 1-handed pistol
ice sickle 10-20 None 1-handed knife
iFlail 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed flail
infernal toilet brush 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed club
kiwi beak 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword
knife 10-20 None 1-handed knife
The Landscaper's leafblower 10-20 35 Mox 2-handed leafblower
  • +1-25 Monster Level based on number of combats with leafblower equipped
lead pipe 10-20 None 1-handed club
lightning rod 10-20 None 1-handed staff
linoleum crossbow 10-20 35 Mox 2-handed crossbow
Loathing Legion chainsaw 10-20 None 2-handed chainsaw
Loathing Legion double prism 10-20 None 1-handed prism
Loathing Legion flamethrower 10-20 None 2-handed flamethrower
Loathing Legion hammer 10-20 None 1-handed hammer
macroplane grater 10-20 35 Mys 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +10%
madius 10-20 36 Mus 1-handed sword
Mafia violin case 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed club
massive wrench 10-20 None 2-handed club
Meat Tenderizer is Murder 10-20 None 1-handed club
Moonthril Flamberge 10-20 40 Mus 2-handed sword
Moonthril Longbow 10-20 40 Mox 2-handed bow
origami riding crop 10-20 None 1-handed crop
oversized pizza cutter 10-20 35 Mys 1-handed utensil
papier-mâchéte 10-20 20 Mus 1-handed sword
  • Weapon Damage +10
  • All Attributes +15%
  • Makes actions more exciting
papier-mâchine gun 10-20 20 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • Ranged Damage +10
  • All Attributes +15%
  • Makes actions more exciting
peppermint harpoon gun 10-20 None 2-handed bazooka
Periodical Paintbrush 10-20 None 1-handed artsything
  • A prize item given to winners of the first calendar art contest
  • All Attributes +0-25%
  • Boost based on Grimace darkness
  • Cannot equip in Hardcore
plastic guitar 10-20 35 Mox 2-handed guitar
plastic nunchaku 10-20 10 Mus 2-handed flail
prehistoric spear 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed throwing spear
Rain-Doh violet bo 10-20 None 2-handed staff
  • +11 Sleaze Damage
  • Moxie +11
Rain-Doh yellow laser gun 10-20 None 1-handed pistol
  • Successful hit weakens opponent.
  • Super Accurate!
reindeer hammer 10-20 None 1-handed club
  • All Attributes +10
reindeer sickle 10-20 None 1-handed claw
  • Successful hit causes bleeding.
revolver 10-20 None 1-handed pistol
ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon 10-20 35 Mus 3-handed ...weapon
right bear arm 10-20 None 1-handed club
roboduck-on-a-string 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed flail
rusted-out shootin' iron 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed club
  • +10% Meat from Monsters
  • Ranged Damage +50
  • Monsters will be less attracted to you.
Saucepanic 10-20 None 1-handed saucepan
  • +2 Mysticality Stat(s) Per Fight
  • +5 Smithsness
  • Mysticality +X%
  • (+% to Mysticality Based on Smithsness)
  • Lets you gather more Soulsauce
  • Enables the casting of 15-turn Sauceror buffs
  • (Bonus for Saucerors only)
scratch 'n' sniff crossbow 10-20 None 1-handed crossbow
  • Actual power can vary with player level
  • Enchantments can be added with stickers
scratch 'n' sniff sword 10-20 None 1-handed sword
  • Actual power can vary with player level
  • Enchantments can be added with stickers
sewage-clogged pistol 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed pistol
Shakespeare's Sister's Accordion 10-20 None 2-handed accordion
sharpened spoon 10-20 20 Mus 1-handed knife  
Sheila Take a Crossbow 10-20 None 1-handed crossbow
  • Regenerate 1-2 HP and MP per adventure
  • +5% Pickpocket Chance
  • +5 Smithsness
  • Combat Initiative +X%
  • (+Initiative based on Smithsness)"
silent pea shooter 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed slingshot
Sneaky Pete's basket 10-20 None 1-handed basket
snow shovel 10-20 None 2-handed polearm
soul knife 10-20 None 1-handed knife Can harm True Mimes
soylent staff 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed staff
space heater 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • +12 Hot Damage
  • So-So Cold Resistance (+2)
space needle 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword
Space Tourist Phaser 10-20 35 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • This Phaser is set to Fun
spant spear 10-20 20 Mus 1-handed spear
spiked femur 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed club
Spooky Putty ball 10-20 None 1-handed superball
Staff of Ed (Actually Ed the Undying) 10-20 None 1-handed staff
  • Quest item
  • Mysticality +25%
  • Spell Damage +25%
  • Regenerate 2-6 MP per adventure
  • +5 Pool Skill
Staff of Fats 10-20 35 Mys 2-handed staff
  • +5 Pool Skill
Staff of Fats (Actually Ed the Undying) 10-20 35 Mys 2-handed staff
  • +5 Pool Skill
steel sword 10-20 20 Mus 1-handed sword
stinky cheese sword 10-20 None 1-handed sword
sugar shank 10-20 None 1-handed knife
sugar shillelagh 10-20 None 2-handed club
sugar shotgun 10-20 None 1-handed pistol
Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword 10-20 35 Mus 2-handed sword
Super Magic Power Sword X 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword
Thor's Pliers 10-20 None 1-handed pliers
time sword 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword
tin drum 10-20 None 2-handed drum
tin foil 10-20 None 1-handed sword
Tropical Crimbo Sword 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed sword
Trusty 10-20 None 2-handed axe
  • Quest item in AoB run
vampire duck-on-a-string 10-20 35 Mus 1-handed flail
whalegun 10-20 None 2-handed rifle
Work is a Four Letter Sword 10-20 None 1-handed sword
wrench 10-20 None 1-handed utensil
17-alarm Saucepan 9-18 15 Mys 1-handed saucepan
ancient stone fist 9-17 27 Mus 1-handed club
anger blaster 9-17 30 Mox 1-handed forearm replacement
broken sword 9-17 27 Mus 1-handed sword
Cerebral Crossbow 9-18 30 Mox 1-handed crossbow
Chelonian Morningstar 9-18 15 Mus 1-handed flail
debonair deboner 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed club
depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed club
doubt cannon 9-17 30 Mox 1-handed forearm replacement
elegant nightstick 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed club
  • Maximum HP +30
  • Maximum MP +15
fear condenser 9-17 30 Mox 1-handed forearm replacement
foot-long hot daub 9-17 27 Mus 2-handed club
grass whistle 9-18 35 Mox 1-handed whistle
Greek Pasta Spoon of Peril 9-18 15 Mys 1-handed utensil
Hammer of Smiting 9-18 15 Mus 1-handed club
huge spoon 9-18 30 Mys 1-handed utensil
icy-hot katana 9-18 30 Mus 2-handed sword
kneecapping stick 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed club
magic whistle 9-17 27 Mox 1-handed whistle
ninja mop 9-18 30 Mus 2-handed polearm
pentatonic accordion 9-18 30 Mox 2-handed accordion
plasma rifle 9-18 None 1-handed rifle
  • Quest item
  • Ranged Damage +20
regret hose 9-17 30 Mox 1-handed forearm replacement
Shagadelic Disco Banjo 9-18 15 Mox 2-handed banjo
Squeezebox of the Ages 9-18 15 Mox 2-handed accordion
stainless steel shillelagh 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed club
vorpal blade 9-18 30 Mus 1-handed sword
4-dimensional guitar 8-16 50 Mox 2-handed guitar
7-Foot Dwarven mattock 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed axe
boilgun 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed rifle
bone bandoneon 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed accordion
broken beer bottle 8-15 10 Mus 1-handed knife
bubble bauble bow 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed bow
can cannon 8-15 22 Mox 2-handed crossbow
candy stick 8-16 25 Mys 1-handed staff
  • Spell Damage +50%
  • +40% Candy Drops from Monsters
chopsticks 8-15 23 Mys 1-handed utensil
clockwork crossbow 8-16 25 Mox 1-handed crossbow
clockwork staff 8-16 25 Mys 2-handed staff
clockwork sword 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed sword
corrupt club of corrupt corruption 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed club
Crimbo ukulele 8-16 20 Mox 2-handed guitar
crowbarrr 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed staff
crystalline reamer 8-15 22 Mys 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +10
elephant stinger 8-15 22 Mus 2-handed spear
flypaper staff 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed staff
frigid hankyū 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed bow
frozen nunchaku 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed flail
giant spider leg 8-15 22 Mus 2-handed club
goblin autoblowgun 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed blowgun
goblin hunting spear 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed spear
grass blade 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed sword
Knob Goblin melon baller 8-16 25 Mys 1-handed utensil
lead yo-yo 8-16 25 Mox 1-handed yo-yo  
logging hatchet 8-15 22 Mus 1-handed axe
Meteoid ice beam 8-16 25 Mox 1-handed gun
piratical blunderbuss 8-16 None 2-handed rifle
pitchfork 8-15 22 Mus 1-handed spear
pixel morning star 8-15 22 Mus 1-handed whip
  • All Attributes +5
quantum disintegrator pistol 8-15 22 Mox 1-handed pistol
rib of the Bonerdagon 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed staff
rusty grave robbing shovel 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed polearm
savory crossbow 8-16 25 Mox 2-handed crossbow
savory staff 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed staff
savory sword 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed sword
severed flipper 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed club
spooky bicycle chain 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed flail
squeaky staff 8-15 22 Mus 2-handed staff
sword of static 8-15 22 Mus 1-handed sword
swordzall 8-16 25 Mus 1-handed sword
  • Weapon Damage +8
  • Maximum MP +10
ultimate ultimate frisbee 8-15 22 Mox 1-handed frisbee
wholeberd 8-16 25 Mus 2-handed polearm
wiffle-flail 8-15 22 Mus 2-handed flail
25-meat staff 7-14 20 Mus 2-handed staff  
accord ion 7-14 20 Mox 1-handed accordion
double-barreled sling 7-14 20 Mox 1-handed sling
finger cymbals 7-13 17 Mox 1-handed cymbals
  • Maximum MP +20
flaming cardboard sword 7-14 20 Mus 1-handed sword
flamingo mallet 7-14 20 Mus 2-handed club
Frost™ brand sword 7-14 20 Mus 1-handed sword
gnawed-up dog bone 7-14 20 Mus 1-handed club
  • +5 to Familiar Weight
  • +1 Familiar Experience Per Combat
grease gun 7-13 17 Mox 1-handed pistol
hippy bongo 7-14 20 Mox 1-handed drum
Kentucky-fried meat crossbow 7-14 20 Mox 2-handed crossbow
Kentucky-fried meat staff 7-14 20 Mus 2-handed staff
Kentucky-fried meat sword 7-14 20 Mus 2-handed sword
Orcish frat-paddle 7-14 20 Mus 1-handed club
Totally Gay Claymore 7-14 19 Mus 2-handed sword
repeating crossbow 7-13 17 Mox 2-handed crossbow
slide rule 7-13 17 Mus 1-handed sword
accordion file 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed accordion
boxing glove on a spring 6-11 12 Mox 1-handed club
BRICKO sword 6-12 None 2-handed club
bubblewrap crossbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed crossbow
bubblewrap staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
bubblewrap sword 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed sword
cardboard crossbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed crossbow
cardboard staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
cardboard sword 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed sword
dense meat crossbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed crossbow
dense meat staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
dense meat sword 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed sword
diamond-studded cane 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed club
eXtreme meat crossbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed crossbow
eXtreme meat staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
eXtreme meat sword 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed sword
filthy pestle 6-12 15 Mys 1-handed utensil
flaming crutch 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed club
glistening staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
Gnollish autoplunger 6-12 15 Mus 3-handed spear
infernal fife 6-11 12 Mox 2-handed flute
knob bugle 6-12 15 Mox 1-handed horn
Knob Goblin elite polearm 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed polearm
muculent machete 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed sword
pair of bolt cutters 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed club
poutine pole 6-11 12 Mus 2-handed staff
ratarang 6-12 15 Mox 1-handed boomerang
sabre teeth 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed knife
shotgun 6-12 None 1-handed
  • Quest item
  • Ranged Damage +10
slightly peevedbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed bow  
styrofoam crossbow 6-12 15 Mox 2-handed crossbow
styrofoam staff 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed staff
styrofoam sword 6-12 15 Mus 1-handed sword
wooden axe 6-12 15 Mus 2-handed axe
5-Alarm Saucepan 5-10 10 Mys 1-handed saucepan
aerogel accordion 5-10 None 1-handed accordion
astral bludgeon 5-10 None 2-handed club
astral longbow 5-10 None 2-handed bow
astral mace 5-10 None 1-handed club
astral pistol 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
Ax of L'rose 5-10 None 2-handed axe  
balloon sword 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed sword
bal-musette accordion 5-10 None 2-handed accordion
basic meat spork 5-9 7 Mys 1-handed utensil
Bjorn's Hammer 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed club
blammer 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • +7% chance of Critical Hit
  • Successful hit weakens opponent.
blunt icepick 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • +15 Cold Damage
boot knife 5-10 None 1-handed knife  
butterfly knife 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed knife
Cajun accordion 5-10 None 2-handed accordion
can of maces 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed club
cheap plastic kazoo 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed kazoo
chiffon chakram 5-10 None 1-handed ranged weapon
clock-cleaning hammer 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • Weapon Damage +20
corn holder 5-10 10 Mys 1-handed utensil
Crimbuccaneer squirtblunderbuss 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
curdflinger 5-9 7 Mox 1-handed crossbow
deathchucks 5-10 10 Mus 2-handed flail
Disco Banjo 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed banjo
dripping meat crossbow 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed crossbow
dripping meat staff 5-10 10 Mus 2-handed staff
dripping meat sword 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed sword
Elf Guard mouthknife 5-10 None 1-handed knife
Elf Guard officer's sidearm 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
Elf Guard squirtgun 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
fluorescent lightbulb 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • Maximum MP +30
gift-a-pult 5-10 None 2-handed giftapult
  • Allows hurling of Gift Items
glow-in-the-dark dart gun 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
guancertina 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed accordion
Hammerus 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • +15 Spooky Damage
high-energy mining laser 5-10 None 2-handed rifle
high-temperature mining drill 5-10 None 2-handed drill
  • Allows Mining in the Velvet / Gold Mine
inflatable baseball bat 5-10 None 2-handed club
iron dagger 5-10 None 1-handed knife
Knob Goblin deluxe scimitar 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed sword
law-abiding citizen cane 5-10 None 1-handed club
loofah ladle 5-10 None 1-handed utensil
LyleCo premium magnifying glass 5-10 None 1-handed club
  • FantasyRealm enemies will drop 1 extra Rubee
Mace of the Tortoise 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed mace
mercenary pistol 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed pistol
  • All Attributes +10
  • Never Fumble
  • Allows the Use of Specialty Ammunition
moss mace 5-10 None 1-handed club
office-supply crossbow 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed crossbow
paraffin pseudoaccordion 5-10 None 1-handed accordion
Pasta Spoon of Peril 5-10 10 Mys 1-handed utensil
pestoblade 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed sword
pixel boomerang 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed boomerang
pixel chain whip 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed whip
  • All Attributes +4
pixel sword 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed sword
poison pen 5-10 None 1-handed knife
polyester peeler 5-10 None 1-handed utensil
  • Part of the Synthetic Suit
  • Spell Damage +20%
  • Regenerate 2-4 MP per adventure
  • Increases the Damage of Stuffed Mortar Shell
pottery club 5-10 None 1-handed club
pottery yo-yo 5-10 None 1-handed yo-yo
primitive alien blowgun 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed blowgun
primitive alien spear 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed spear
quirky accordion 5-10 None 2-handed accordion
Red Rover BB gun 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed gun
Rock and Roll Legend 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed accordion
sawed-off blunderbuss 5-10 None 1-handed pistol
Skipper's accordion 5-10 10 Mox 2-handed accordion
sucker tachi 5-10 None 1-handed weapon
  • Weapon Damage +10
tambourine 5-10 10 Mox 1-handed drum
  • Maximum HP +20
  • Maximum MP +20
toy Crimbot power glove 5-10 None 1-handed knuckles
  • Part of the Crimbot Crimboutfit
  • Weapon Damage +15
  • +1 Crimbot Outfit Power
  • Allows use of ZAP in combat
Unionize The Elves sign 5-10 10 Mus 1-handed club
velour voulge 5-10 None 1-handed polarm
warbear exhaust manifold 5-10 None 2-handed accordion
warbear oil pan 5-10 None 1-handed saucepan
wooden spoon 5-10 10 Mys 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +5
worm-riding hooks 5-10 None 2-handed club  
big bass drum 4-7 2 Mox 2-handed drum
calavera concertina 4-8 5 Mox 2-handed accordion
corrupt club of corruption 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed club
Dr. Hobo's scalpel 4-7 2 Mus 1-handed knife
dreadlock whip 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed whip
dueling banjo 4-8 5 Mox 2-handed banjo
Gnollish flyswatter 4-7 2 Mus 1-handed club  
Gnollish plunger 4-7 2 Mus 1-handed spear  
half-sized guitar 4-8 5 Mox 2-handed guitar
ironic battle spoon 4-8 5 Mys 1-handed utensil
jack flapper 4-7 2 Mys 1-handed utensil
mama's squeezebox 4-8 5 Mox 2-handed accordion
plastic replica blaster pistol 4-8 None 1-handed
  • Combat Initiative +20%
  • Ranged Damage +20
  • This item disappears at the end of the day
pocket theremin 4-7 2 Mox 2-handed theremin
pool cue 4-8 10 Mus 2-handed staff
rubber axe 4-8 5 Mus 2-handed axe
sealhide whip 4-7 2 Mus 1-handed whip
spooky staff 4-7 2 Mus 2-handed staff
starchy crossbow 4-8 5 Mox 1-handed crossbow
starchy staff 4-8 5 Mus 2-handed staff
starchy sword 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed sword
suede shortsword 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed sword  
weighted paperclip chain 4-8 None 2-handed flail
western-style skinning knife 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed knife
white sword 4-8 5 Mus 1-handed sword
amok putter 3-6 None 2-handed club
  • +9 Hot Damage
  • +9 Cold Damage
  • Combat Initiative +18%
Bananubis's Staff 3-6 None 1-handed
  • Quest item
  • -6 Luck
  • Raise Skeleton Buddies
baritone accordion 3-6 None 2-handed accordion
Barney's rake 3-5 None 2-handed polearm
bat whip 3-6 None 1-handed whip
beer-soaked mop 3-6 None 2-handed polearm
bone rattle 3-6 None 1-handed rattle
breadwand 3-5 None 1-handed wand
cardboard katana 3-6 None 1-handed sword
cardboard wakizashi 3-6 None 1-handed sword
cheap plastic blowgun 3-5 None 1-handed blowgun
cheap plastic bottle opener 3-6 None 1-handed utensil
Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife 3-6 None 1-handed knife
eggbeater 3-5 None 1-handed utensil
electric crutch 3-6 None 1-handed staff
evil paper umbrella 3-6 None 1-handed umbrella
Gnollish slotted spoon 3-5 None 1-handed utensil
grave robbing shovel 3-6 None 2-handed polearm
halfberd 3-6 None 1-handed polearm
huge mirror shard 3-6 None 1-handed knife
Knob Goblin spatula 3-6 None 1-handed utensil
little paper umbrella 3-6 None 1-handed umbrella
obsidian dagger 3-6 10 Mus 1-handed knife
out-of-tune biwa 3-6 None 2-handed guitar
palm-frond whip 3-5 None 1-handed whip
parasitic claw 3-6 None 1-handed club
portable corkscrew 3-6 None 1-handed utensil
rattail whip 3-6 None 1-handed whip
rubber band gun 3-6 None 1-handed pistol
rubber spatula 3-5 None 1-handed utensil
  • Spell Damage +2
sewer snake 3-6 None 1-handed flail
shiny butcherknife 3-6 None 1-handed utensil
skeleton bone 3-6 None 1-handed club
spooky stick 3-6 None 2-handed staff
spork 3-6 None 1-handed utensil
stone banjo 3-5 None 2-handed banjo
sturdy machete 3-6 None 1-handed sword
  • Quest item
  • Weapon Damage +5
tail o' nine cats 3-6 None 1-handed whip
third-hand nunchaku 3-6 7 Mus 2-handed flail
throwing wrench 3-6 None 1-handed club
trusty torch 3-6 None 1-handed club
trusty whip 3-6 None 1-handed whip
  • Quest item
Wand of Nagamar 3-6 None 1-handed wand  
wooden stakes 3-5 None 2-handed spear
asparagus knife 2-3 None 1-handed knife
basic meat crossbow 2-4 5 Mox 2-handed crossbow
basic meat staff 2-4 5 Mus 2-handed staff
basic meat sword 2-4 5 Mus 2-handed sword
beer-battered accordion 2-4 None 2-handed accordion
  • +2 Sleaze Damage
  • (Bonus for Accordion Thieves only)
bonerang 2-4 None 1-handed boomerang
  • +10 Damage vs. Skeletons
boning knife 2-4 None 1-handed knife
  • +10 Damage vs. Skeletons
cap gun 2-4 None 1-handed pistol
club of corruption 2-4 None 1-handed club
dented harmonica 2-4 None 1-handed horn
dishrag 2-4 None 1-handed whip
fouet de tortue-dressage 2-4 None 1-handed whip
gnauga hide whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
Gnollish pie server 2-4 None 1-handed utensil
hippo whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
Knob Goblin scimitar 2-3 None 1-handed sword
Knob Goblin tongs 2-4 None 1-handed utensil
penguin whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
remaindered axe 2-4 None 1-handed club
  • Muscle +2
  • Weapon Damage +2
scorpion whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
slingshot 2-4 None 2-handed slingshot  
soup-chucks 2-3 None 2-handed flail
space beast fur whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
sweet ninja sword 2-4 None 1-handed sword  
tiny ninja sword 2-4 None 1-handed sword
wumpus-hair whip 2-3 None 1-handed whip
yak whip 2-4 None 1-handed whip
airblaster gun 1-2 None 1-handed pistol
antique accordion 1-2 None 2-handed accordion
archaeologing shovel 1-2 None 2-handed polearm
bar whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
big stick 1-2 None 2-handed staff  
bucket of anniversary lard 1-2 None 1-handed flail
  • All Attributes +1
candy knuckles 1-2 None 1-handed knuckles
can-you-dig-it? 1-2 None 1-handed spade
  • +???
chisel 1-2 None 1-handed knife  
clown hammer 1-2 None 1-handed club
  • Squeaky!
clown whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
cool whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip  
costume sword 1-2 None 1-handed sword
demon whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
disco ball 1-2 None 1-handed disco ball  
hilarious comedy prop 1-2 None 1-handed club
  • Regenerate 4-6 HP and MP per adventure
KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat 1-2 None 2-handed club
lavalarva 1-2 None 1-handed whip
licorice whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
  • +5% Chance of Critical Hit
  • Candiful Crits
live wire 1-2 None 1-handed whip
Mayor Ghost's gavel 1-2 None 1-handed club
  • +10% Chance of Critical Hit
  • Weapon Damage +30
  • +50 Damage vs. Ghosts
  • Grants skill Hammer Ghost
murderbot whip 1-2 30 Mus 1-handed whip
The Necbromancer's Wizard Staff 1-2 200 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
pasta spoon 1-2 None 1-handed utensil  
pixel whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
  • All Attributes +3
rope 1-2 None 1-handed whip
  • +2 Muscle Stat(s) Per Fight
  • +10 to Familiar Weight
saucepan 1-2 None 1-handed saucepan
  • Enables the casting of 5-turn Sauceror buffs (all classes)
seal-clubbing club 1-2 None 1-handed club  
Spelunker's whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
  • Part of Spelunker's Gear
  • Weapon Damage +25%
  • +10% Item Drops from Monsters
  • +5 to Familiar Weight
Spooky Putty snake 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of Blood and Pudding 1-2 15 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of Fruit Salad 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item only in AoJ run
  • Spell Damage +10
  • Moxie +10
  • Regenerate 2-3 MP per adventure
  • Jiggle: Deal some Prismatic damage
Staff of Holiday Sensations 1-2 75 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Spell Damage +75%
  • +15 Damage to Cold Spells
  • Regenerate 5-6 MP per adventure
Staff of Kitchen Royalty 1-2 200 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of Queso Escusado 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of Simmering Hatred 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the All-Steak 1-2 50 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item only in AoJ run
  • Spell Damage +50%
  • Damage Reduction: 15
  • Regenerate 5-6 MP per adventure
  • Jiggle: Massive Bonus to Item Drops (5 charges left today)
Staff of the Black Kettle 1-2 75 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Cozy Fish 1-2 85 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Cream of the Cream 1-2 50 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item
  • Spell Damage +50%
  • Moxie +30
  • Regenerate 5-6 MP per adventure
  • Jiggle: Attune to Monster's Essence
Staff of the Deepest Freeze 1-2 200 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Electric Range 1-2 75 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Spell Damage +50%
  • +20 Damage to Spooky Spells
  • Regenerate 8-10 MP per adventure
Staff of the Grand Flambé 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Grease Trap 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Greasefire 1-2 20 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Headmaster's Victuals 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
  • Regenerate 2-3 MP per adventure
  • +5 Damage to Sleaze Spells
  • +5 Smithsness
  • +X Spell Damage
  • (+Spell Damage based on Smithsness)
Staff of the Healthy Breakfast 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Hearty Dinner 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item only in AoJ run
  • Spell Damage +10
  • Damage Reduction: 5
  • Regenerate 2-3 MP per adventure
  • Jiggle: Weaken Bad Guy
Staff of the Kitchen Floor 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Light Lunch 1-2 None 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Lunch Lady 1-2 75 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item only in KOLHS run
  • Spell Damage +75%
  • Maximum HP/MP +15
  • Regenerate 5-6 MP per adventure
  • +25% Food Drops from Monsters
Staff of the Midnight Snack 1-2 15 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the November Jack-O-Lantern 1-2 15 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Peppermint Twist 1-2 200 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Roaring Hearth 1-2 250 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Scummy Sink 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Short Order Cook 1-2 15 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Soupbone 1-2 75 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Staff of Life 1-2 50 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
  • Quest item in AoJ run
  • Spell Damage +50%
  • Maximum HP +30
  • Regenerate 5-6 MP per adventure
  • Regenerate 10-12 HP per adventure
  • Jiggle: Full HP Recovery
Staff of the Standalone Cheese 1-2 50 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Teapot Tempest 1-2 25 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Walk-In Freezer 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Well-Tempered Cauldron 1-2 125 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
Staff of the Woodfire 1-2 150 Mys 1-handed chefstaff
sticky hand whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
stolen accordion 1-2 None 2-handed accordion
stuffed club 1 None 1-handed club
  • Replaces sound effects
stuffed crazy bastard sword 1-2 None 1-handed sword  
tiny plastic sword 1-2 None 1-handed sword
toy accordion 1-2 None 2-handed accordion
  • Enables the casting of 5-turn AT buffs (all classes)
toy taijijian 1-2 None 1-handed sword  
trash net 1-2 None 2-handed polearm
  • Quest item
turtle totem 1-2 None 1-handed totem
  • Enables the casting of 5-turn TT buffs (all classes)
twisted-up wet towel 1-2 None 1-handed whip
white whip 1-2 None 1-handed whip
KoL Con 12-gauge 0-0 None 1-handed shotgun
  • Maximum HP/MP +12
Tales of the Word Realms 0-0 None 2-handed book
  • Lends Power to Your Words
gnollish nunchaku N/A None 2-handed flail
  • No longer available in game
turtleslinger N/A None 1-handed slingshot
  • No longer available in game
Equipment Lists
Hats | Shirts | Back Items | Off-hand Items | Pants | Accessories | Familiar Equipment
Weapons (Melee | Mysticality | Ranged | One-Handed | Two-handed / Three-handed)

See also

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